


What's Left Unsaid

by darkphoenix168



Category: InuYasha - A Feudal Fairy Tale
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Arranged Marriage, F/M, Sex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-28
Updated: 2021-02-25
Packaged: 2021-03-06 14:49:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 25
Words: 96,496
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26150671
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darkphoenix168/pseuds/darkphoenix168
Summary: An arranged marriage is not always a happy union, but Rin is determined to make the best of it. Unfortunately, her new husband keeps everything locked away and secret, even from the one woman he wants more than ever. Can anything grow in a garden that no one knows how to care for?
Relationships: Rin/Sesshoumaru (InuYasha)
Comments: 183
Kudos: 539





	1. Wedding Day

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! Gonna give posting longer stories a try here! This has been sitting in my WIP folders forever and with the sequel coming out I figured why not! (Anybody else not ready for the sequel?)
> 
> This is set (broadly) in the Victorian Era (1800's. Early 1880's fashion with late 1800's technology). Apologies in advance to any history buffs ;P
> 
> Edit 02/24/2021: What's this? A new tag? ;P

Silence was not the most uncomfortable thing one could experience,  and at the moment, it did not help the young bride’s situation.

Brown eyes stared silently out of the small window, her lungs expelling a deep sigh.

Her wedding day could not be any better; a beautiful blue sky was dotted by  white puffy clouds and swallows flying high, their arched tails soaring on the breezes that could only be felt so high up. The trees were full with flowers and greenery , lea ves opened and greeting the sun. 

Inside was just as marvellous. Even for a small ceremony, the wood was polished till it shone and the marble floor held the  reflection of their few guests and, while she hadn’t seen any of the other occupants,  the young woman was sure they were just as immaculate as she was. 

The whit e dress was simple ,  silk  wrapping around her bodice and flowing out from her waist. Upon her request , the dress maker had left out any padding and  petticoats , the only detail was the floral beading  up her right side.

The young woman’s jaw tightened as she fiddled with the small flowers in her bouquet , her heart in her throat as she kept repeated what was to be her new last name in hopes that it would start to come naturally.

Mrs. Rin Takahashi… Mrs. Rin Takahashi… Mrs. Rin Takahashi…

Her husband-to-be could not have been more perfect either , man or demon. His  family  ruled most of the Western Lands, making them unimaginably wealthy and powerful. Their lineage was old and honoured, and, as though he was not a catch already, Sesshomaru Takahashi was incredibly attractive. Fit and skilled with a blade, the demon stood tall and proud, his silver hair falling down his  back and to his hips, his markings  pronounced on his sharp cheeks and strong jaw , and his amber eyes could pierce anyone’s soul .

But they were cold.

As a Lady herself , Rin was already contemplating marriage to a young man in a neighbouring estate ; he was shorter and held most of his mass around his stomach, but he was sweet and kind , always laughing and smiling about some small thing.

And then her family fell on hard times.

They  were from one of the Northernmost regions, operating as a trade centre  for goods and visitors before they would travel over the mountains to the bordering country.  Now, however, with a few consecutively harsh winters  slowing business and deterring tourist s , her father, a proud military veteran, had no choice but to make a business deal with  a neighbouring land, and the Takahashi’s  offered the best.

Each land owner had a high price for their aid, a fact Rin knew as there was  great potential in her family’ s land, despite the hard times. Still, the Takahashi’s of the West seemed to show the most i nterest in it and  at least treated  him with some semblance of respect.

They offered a few deals,  but the most prosperous one seemed to involve her marital status. In it, the Nakamura’s would offer lower tariffs on products to and from the West in exchange for  several  necessities, not  the least of which was an easier road through the mountains and more food for the people. 

And husband for Rin.

The young woman had been involved in the talks with her father, the elder demanding that she be in charge of her own fate  and let her make the final decision. Sh e had to admit, for a demon whose hatred for humans was known even to her, she found it bewildering that a marriage proposal be apart of the negotiations.

Never the less, it was something she could do, something she could offer her family. Aside from the  agreements, she, and by extension, her family, would be granted immeasurable status and wealth, perhaps earning her father the respect he so rightfully deserved.

A  short knock on her door disrupted her thoughts,  her head turning to look at her guest, her skirts hit ched up as she came to her feet.

“It ’s open.”

Rin watched as her father timidly stepped into her room, his tall body  unfurling in her dressing room, the usually strong and  tough solider now appearing small and defenceless.

“How I wish this was a happy  day for you,” the old man murmured, his body coming to hug his only daughter, “oh my Rin…”

“Father,” tears were kept at bay as the young woman slid into the man ’s strong embrace, his well -formed muscles refusing to let her go.

“Look at you,” her father continued, “ you’re as beautiful as your mother…”

Laughing, Rin turned to kiss her fathers  bearded cheek, her body pulling back while hands kept together. 

“I think mother made a better bride than I,” Rin told him quietly, her throat catching a t how much she missed the woman that would undoubtedly be the life of the party.

“That’s only because her wedding was her choice,” the man told her solemnly, his eyes glancing to her hair, “that… and she  was herself in her dress.”

“Father!”

Rin protested weakly as her father’s fast fingers pulled the hair pin free from the hair the women had spent hours  tying back and fighting.

“There,” her father smiled, “much better ,” his fingers slipped through her loose waves, “that’s my Rin…”

“Father…”

The young w oman felt silence overtake her, her eyes turning to her reflection,  her long hair framing her cheeks and eyes.

“You were always a wild spirit,” the man spoke calmly, “and, while it made  you a rather difficult child, it is something that should always remain in you.”

Again, Rin said nothing as she turned to face her father, his hands digging through his pockets to pull out  a jeweled box . Pulling out the silk  package, his fingers proceeded to unwrap  her gift, a tiny glass tiger lily sitting on top of a jeweled comb .

“Father…”

“This… was the first gift I gave your mother,” the elder started quietly, “ she wore it on our wedding day…and at every special event after that,” hi s eyes were glassy as he looked to his daughter, “she begged me to give it  to you when you were old enough … it was supposed to be for your coming of age ball but… well,” he smiled  sadly, “better late then never… right?”

“Daddy…”

Rin let her Lady training slip  for a moment as she  felt tears fill her eyes , her father reaching to pull a few strands  off her face, the comb running through a small lock and coming to  rest on the left side of her head.

“If you ever want to come home, just hop on the first ride you can,”  her father whispered, “you’ll always have a place, I promise.”

“ I’ll always remember that,” the young lady promised, “but… I need to make my place here too.”

The elder nodded as he stepped back to look over his daughter once more , his lower lip quivering at the sight of  his baby girl all grown up and making a decision that should have been reserved for him and him alone.

“Your family does appreciate this sacrifice,” her father told her kindly, “and… we’ll always be here for you .”

“Thank you father,” Rin smiled sadly, her head turning to the young man timidly knocking on her door, “and it looks like I need to be wife now .”

“Then it seems I need to walk you down the aisle,” the elder smiled , his arm held out for his youngest child .

Rin smiled at her father, the first little bit of happiness budding in his chest  on what was supposed to be the happiest day of her life.

“I’m scared… father,” th e young woman admitted quietly,  her father’s hand patting hers.

“I know love,” he murmured, “ I am too,” his lips touched her cheek, “ but we can always turn  left instead of right…”

“Just because I’m scared doesn’t mean I’m going to run,” Rin teased quietly,  her father chuckling at her tenacity.

“ And who taught you a stupid thing like that?” the man asked her, their feet stepping in unison.

“ Why, only the bravest man I know,” his daughter whispered, “ you, father,” her body stopping to look him in the eye, “because you  taught me to be this way , I can do this.”

Steel blue eyes searched hers, his jaw settin g as his fingers ran  over her cheek before he  reache d to touch the clip on the side o f her head. 

“I would never change anything about you,” her  father told  her, “ but…  sometimes…  I wish you  weren’t so headstrong … and I wish it wouldn’t take you away from me.”

“You’re the one who says I’m a wild child ,” Rin pointed out, “you’re the one who says I can’t be caged.”

“And nor should you be,”  the man smiled warmly to his daughter,  “ so I guess… it’s time for me to let you go…” his hands brought her forehead to his lips, “but I  will always have a hand out for you to take hold.”

Their embrace was tight and warm, Rin never wanting to let go of her father, the man that  worked so hard  to take care of her and to raise her into a Lady without her mother.

She was going to miss him so much , miss being a little girl, miss being his treasured daughter .

Miss home.

“ I suppose I can’t  prolong this anymore,” her father murmured, “ time to wed you off my dear; to the luckiest demon alive.”

* * *

Long sleeves were tugged and pulled in an attempt to straighten out any imaginary creases and wrinkles, his outfit as immaculate as he always required. 

The demon raised his head to the mirror, his jaw tightening as he lifted his hand to brush a stray hair off his black suit ,  half hating how glaring an imperfection his white hair was on his black out fit. Turning to make sure the rest of him was polished, the demon straightened the hem of his coat and adjusted  the  deep red cravat around his neck, the fabric tucked ne atly into his jacket, a gold pin with his family’s crest  proudly displayed in the middle of the red.

He didn’t pay attention to the door creaking open, know that his father was checking in on him, as no  servant would dare disturb him until it was time.

“Sesshomaru.”

Turning, amber eyes watched as his father stepped  into his dressing room, the demon dressed professionally for his son’s wedding.

“You look nice,” the elder started, “ are you ready?”

“What do I need to be ready for?” Sesshomaru asked, the cuffs of his suit adjusted, “ it’s just a wedding.”

“Just a wedding,” his father whispered, “Sesshomaru-”

“If the marriage doesn’ t work, we can get an annulment or divorce-”

“Sesshomaru!”

For once the demon held his tongue as his father groaned slightly , his fingers rubbing his temples.

“Don’t play coy with me,” the elder demon commented, “ not today.”

“Then what do you want to know?” the groom murmured, his cufflinks straightened out.

InuTaisho remained silent for a moment, his heart sinking as he wondered what became of the  young boy that, while stubbo rn and impassive, would not got his far for his own personal gain.

“Are you sure, about going through this,” his father r epeated for the umpteenth time, “marrying this girl?”

“ She’s a woman,” Sesshomaru pointed out,  “and she agreed to this too,” the demon hearing  his elder sighing softly.

“She’s barely in her twenties,” InuTaisho told him, “ and this arrangement was not of her choosing either.”

Sesshomaru kept quiet as he fiddled with his attire, his  wrist flicking to look at the hands on his watch.

“That girl is a romantic at heart,” his father continued, “ she still needs her father  and for her, this is a big deal,” his hand came to touch the younger’s shoulder, “ please treat it as such .”

His son  took in a deep breath  as the amber eyes turned to his father’ s, the elder  wanting desperately to pull his child into a hug.

“I guess that ’s the advice I give you on your wedding day,” InuTaisho sucked in a deep breath, “ I just wish it was… to be followed with a celebration.”

“Neither of us saw the point,” Sesshomaru interrupted quietly,  his father’s lips tightening in a thin line.

“ That’s not what I meant,” the elder demon murmured, “and you know that.”

Sesshomaru deliberately avoided his father’s gaze as a young boy timidly approached the door,  the demon’s nod allowing the child to scurry away.

“I always thought your wedding would be  a bigger affair,” InuTaisho commented as he followed his son down the hall,  “ with more witnesses...”

“ I thought you were done with your advice,” Sesshomaru commented quietly, his father  sighing for the umpteenth time.

“I am not going to stop you from going through with this ,” the elder murmured, “you’re an adult now...  but  I just don’t want you  hurting someone -”

“Father!”

Both demons stopped as the younger turned to his father, his eyes narrowing  at the implications .

“ Do not act like you don’t know my reasoning for this,” his son murmured dangerously, “ _ you _ agreed to the conditions,  and you  agreed  to this wedding-”

“ I know why you wanted  the marriage to be part of the deal,”  InuTaisho told him firmly, “but what I don’t know is how she’s going to fair in all this ...  with you.”

“You talk as if she’s some sort of delicate flower ,” Sesshomaru retorted,  “she’s been through worse than me.”

InuTaisho stood tall, his breath deep and his head high.

“You’re right,” the elder started, “ she’s a young woman, not some delicate flower,” his body starti ng to move towards his son’s wedding,  his hand touching the younger’s back, “ but whether or not you’re the worst thing to happen to her is entirely up to you.”

Sesshomaru’s jaw tightened at the words, his eyes looking directly forward.

“I am a Takahashi,” the younger demon murmured, “I have to uphold our family name as best I can,” his eyes glancing to his father, “  even around her.”

“You better,” his father commented as they moved into the room where the small ceremony was to take place, “ th is woman deserves that and more,” he stopped his son for a second time, “she deserves a good husband.”

The  groom nodded, his attention turning to the Father  flipping through the instructions he had been sent.

“Thank you... father,” Sesshomaru nodded, “ for your advice … and for  being here…”

His father felt a smile tug at the corner of his lips at the words, his shoulders sagging as he sighed.

“It’s your wedding day,” the elder murmured, “I wouldn’t miss this for the world.”

* * *

Both men stood silently by the alter, Sesshomaru and his father having agreed to the soldier’s request to some semblance of a traditional wedding ceremony. The priest seemed slightly uncomfortable with the swiftness of the situation, though that may have had more to do with the fact that there were two demons standing on holy ground.

All their confusion and thoughts stopped once the doors  opened and the bride stepped through. 

The elder demon and his son both turned to the young woman walking down the aisle, her eyes turned downwards to her white shoes and bouquet of flowers, the traditional roses replaced with white wildflowers  and ivy. The veil over her  face lace, her dress simplistic yet beautiful, the ornate beading running up her side  reflecting the light that spilled from the glass windows. Her gloved hand  was held by her father’s, the man’s brass and gold metals shining, his stripes  displayed proudly on his chest and just beneath his shoulders. 

Their arrival at the altar was slow, his hand reaching to remove his soldier’s hat before he lifted his daughter’s  veil to kiss her on the cheek, her lips doing the same.

Replacing the lace over her face,  the elder standing at attention beside her, his eyes looking at the priest while resisting the urge to grab his daughter and  run from the Western Lands.

InuTaisho looked from the bride to her father, the man stone-faced and  calm, a product of his military training. It was not enough, however,  to keep all emotions at ba y; a sliver of sorrow slipped between the cracks of his mask.

“If I may proceed,” the priest started smoothly, “now, both par ties have agreed to forgo their vows, and since there is no audience, there has also been a request that I keep it simple and to the point, am I correct in saying that? ”

“ Indeed,” the groom nodded, his bride saying nothing as she nodded as well, her heart in her throat  and she feared it would leap from her mouth if she opened it.

“I have also been informed that this is more of a formality, for the bride’s family ,”  he looked to Rin’s father, “and that the official marriage licence will be signed after this?”

“Yes, Father,” the soldier nodded, “ her… her mother always insi sted on he r wedding having some tradition.”

“Of course,” the man nodded, his body adjusting at the altar, book in his  hand , “let’s begin.”

Rin felt her heart pound in her chest as the man began his sermon , the young woman  nodding with the groom at all the right times, their fathers  handing out the rings for their new  in-laws. The steel felt cold as it slid onto her f inger, her own hands trembling as she slipped the silver band on his.

“ Sesshomaru Takahashi,” Rin’s  heart pounded at the words as they marked what could be the beginning of the end for her , “do you, take Rin  Nakamori to be your wife, to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, till death do you part?”

“I do.”

The words made her breathing shake a little more , her eyes remaining focused on the flowers in her hands.

“Rin  Nakamori ,”  the man turned his attention to the young woman, “do you take Sesshoma ru Takahashi to be your husband, to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, till death do you part?”

No.

She was not ready for this, she was not ready to be a wife to a man she didn’t know let alone love . Other women could do it, sure, and they should be admired for their courage and o ptimism, but she was not  like them. 

She wasn’t ready  to marry.

“I… do.”

The man nodded to the two of them , his chest filling as he stood tall.

“And… is there any opposition from the fathers?”

InuTaisho shook her head along with Rin’ s father, though their eyes were saying the opposite.

“Then I pronounce you husband and wife,” he nodded to the demon, “you may kiss your bride.”

Rin could practically feel her father tense beside her as the new couple turned to each other, the veil covering her face  pushed back an d her head lifting to her new husband ’ s , eyes closing as his lips lowered to meet her s.

Th eir first kiss seemed cold, his mouth  firm and seemingly experienced in these matters,  though that could have been  the rumours playing tricks on Rin’ s m ind. When she timidly kissed back, the demon  decided to end it , his body pulling away from  hers and leaving her  standing awkwardly, her face flushing slightly and her heart beating for a reason other than nervousness.

“Shall we move on to signing the  document,” the priest interrupted them, Rin nodding weakly as she turned to follow the elder, her eyes noticing her groom, her husband now,  offer his arm to her.

As he r father was seemingly about too.

Silently, the young woman sil ently accepted her husband’s arm, her heart hurting at the expression on her father’s face. With her head held high, the young woman followe d the elder into the back room, still not ready to sign away her future.


	2. Wedding Night

An ebony carriage clattered on through the winding countryside rolling hills bleeding into  long and large rivers. The land was carved up with long stretches of stone fencing , cows and sheep breaking up the stretches of shades of green. B rown eyes stared determinedly out the window of her carriage, trying to keep her emotions from bubbling over. Fingers twisted the  small gold ring around her finger , th e small diamonds catching the light before they disappeared  towards her palm. Even as she fiddled with her wedding ring it really hadn’t sunk in yet.

She was married.

In truth, she didn’t really get much of a wedding or celebration. After the signing of their certificate she and Sesshomaru went their separate ways to get changed and then head home. The two had stepped into separate carriages, not that Rin complained too much. Her father hugged her tighter and longer than ever before , and Rin could’ve sworn she saw tears in his eyes as her carriage pulled away. Her stoic, military, do it right the  first-time father was emotional over her. Part of Rin was glad there wasn’t a celebration or dinner ; she doubted she could’ve kept her composure with her father as choked up as he was.

Then again, if there were a celebration,  he might’ve been happy, and drunk himself into something of a stupor.

She smoothed out the  invisible crease in her  pink silk dress; her father suggested that something bright and cheery after the wedding so that her white dress could stay clean. Rin suspected he would rather she wear something darker, given his feelings on the matter. She really couldn’t  act blind as to why; her father trusted Sesshomaru’s father, but not the young  demon himself.  It was likely that  because  he  had  asked for Rin’s hand in marriage as part of a business deal that made the retired general  loathe him so. Rin wasn’t so  stupid ; she knew she was the apple in her father’s eye, and he’d have done anything to make her happy. Perhaps that’s why Sesshomaru wanted her hand in marriage; keep her father in line.

The carriage stopping made her focus on the out side.  Two gates opened smoothly to let the advancing entourage in , Rin surprised with how long  and winding the drive was. The white stones wound through the trees , vanishing from the sight of the main road. She supposed he enjoyed his privacy.

Rin watched as a beautiful manor came into view. It was much bigger than anything she’d lived in , but she expected more trees cut into unnatural shapes, less  wild nature on her doorstep. To the right was a path that led through the trees towards a  brick building. A shed perhaps? Or a stable?  The horses came to a stop in front of the doorway to the house , just behind the carriage that her husband was in.

Sesshomaru appeared by her door, the footman opening the  carriage before  the demon extended his hand to her. Accepting it, Rin  gathered up her  pink skirts and descended, her eyes fixated on the house in front of her.

It was so beautiful, and yet there was a simplicity about it. It was a large house with great grey bricks and ivy climbing up the side of the wall.  Everything seemed symmetrical, from the arched windows on each of the  two stories, to the large double doors that held black iron around  the polished oak. The area in front of the  manor was wide and open, despite the forest that they seemed to live in, and filled with what Rin would assume were expensive stones.

“Your home is beautiful,” Rin said, standing still as the servants bustled around them to gather the things that were not sent on ahead.

“It’s yours now.”

R in found his words more informative, rather than comforting.

“This  way.”

Hoping she hid her hesitation, Rin slipped her arm into his, ignoring that as a new brid e she should be carried over the threshold, rather than walked. A servant opened the  door  from the inside. He was a small imp, standing almost at her knee, but held himself with such pride that Rin was surprised he hadn’t puffed up and floated away.

“Welcome, Lord Sesshomaru,” he spoke in a  squawking tone, but bowed respectfully to his Master, “and you, Lady Taka ha shi.”

“Oh—”

“Rin,” Sesshomaru said, “this is Jaken, my personal assistant.”

“Pleasure,” Rin curtseyed to him, “ call me—”

“Lord Sesshomaru!”

Rin was slightly taken aback by the imp turning away from her to squawk at his master. She looked from one to the other,  watching Sesshomaru tell him off and send him back inside the house .

“Welcome,” Sesshomaru said curtly,  stepping aside so she can enter the mansion.

“Thank you,” Rin inclined her head , enterin g her new home.

She was greeted by warm wood and expensive rugs. Thankfully, Jaken was the only staff there to greet them. The rest were  gathering her things from the carriage or running around the house in practiced silence .  The hallway branched off in two directions, both hallways on either side of the large staircase that went up one flight before it too split , one to the west wing, and another to the east.

It wasn’t ostentatious or overly extravagant, but  his wealth  was evident in every corner of the manor. Rich mahogany paneled the walls , and the floors were another wood Rin probably couldn’t  pronounce. The brass was likely gold and was polished to shine , and there wasn’t a spot of anything  on the gas lamps. Unsure of where to walk, Rin stood in the entranceway, entranced by the magnificence of her new home.

“Dinner will be in  an hour or so ,” Sesshomaru said, taking off his coat , “I’ll see you then.”

“You’ll… what?”

“I have some  last-minute files to finish before  tomorrow morning.”

“On… our wedding day?”

She couldn’t deny the feeling of hurt that twisted in her stomach. True, they weren’t going to have a party or even a dinner, but to work on their wedding day stung.

“Work doesn’t stop for a wedding,” Sesshomaru told her, “ you should know that, given your father’s profession.”

“But there’s usually someone he could trust to leave for occasions like this.”

“I’m not so lucky.”

Rin fell mute , resisting the temptation to run back into the carriage and  run home. No, this was her home.

“My Lady.”

Snapped out of her reprieve, Rin turned to one of the maids that was bowing low to her. Her husband  had left her standing alone in the entranceway, with nothing more than  her mother’s hair comb in her hand.

“The master bedroom is up this way, if you’d like to freshen up before dinner.”

“Oh… yes,” Rin  nodded, taking her first few steps into her house, “lead the way, please .”

Rin followed the maid, who remained tight-lipped  despite Rin’s prying, up the stairs and towards the master bedroom. Wood changed to c arpeting, a deep red along the hallways , and matched some of the flowers Sesshomaru had in vases scattered on antique tables that lined the walls.

“In here my Lady.”

The double doors swung open to reveal an open and beautiful room. The carpet here was cream and the y matched the curtains that bordered large and wide windows. An entire wall had been  devoted to  the windows that reached from ceiling to floor. Curious, Rin walked towards them,  looking out to the back of the property . It wasn’t manicured or filled with symmetrical hedges and gardens, but instead was filled with forest. There was some lawn, but  it was no where near as impressive as the old forest that she now lived on.

“This is amazing…”

It was only when Rin turned did she realize she was talking to herself. She supposed the servants must be used to disappearing without a sound . It was only then that a  large silk bag in the closet caught her eye. Curious, she stepped towards it, her heart sinking when she realized what it was.  Rin opened the bag, staring at her wedding dress one more time. Something caught in her throat at the sight of it.

Wasn’t this supposed to be an amazing day for her ?

Her fingers ran over the silk and lace , letting the white fabric fall from her hand and float  back into place. She  always  thought her husband was supposed to take it off her tonight, after a day of drinking, eating, and celebrating with their family and friends. Given how quickly all of this had to take place everyone thought it would be best if it were just the two of them and their fathers. Small and private ,  as her father requested. Not that Rin was overly upset by this, letting her have more time to prepare for high society, but she supposed she would have liked to spend a day in celebration.

Closing the bag, s he sat down on the large bed, her eyes looking up at the high ceiling  and dark trim.

This was really her home now.

Rin ran her hand over the large comforter on the bed, the  material feeling expensive under her fingertips. The cream was embroidered with  gold dragons,  the long snake-like beasts twisting around each other.  The  bedsheets underneath was a deep navy blue ; a perfect contrast  from the comforter overtop. Rin followed her hands  up to the other side of the bed, her eyes taking in a book and a crystal glass on a coaster.

A knot suddenly formed in her throat.

They really were going to share a bed together.

She just needed a moment to breathe.

Rin  slowly entered the  bathroom , a handkerchief in her hands and dabbing her eyes. Talking a moment to stare at herself in the mirror, Rin ’s jaw tightened and her fingers gripped the sink.  She let the cold water run for a moment  before it splashed into her face. The cool ness  calmed her skin and her eyes , the traces of sorrow almost hidden. Dabbing the water away with a fluffy towel , Rin felt her heart rate calm slightly as she steeled her resolve.

She was far too old to be homesick.

She was married now; she had  to hold herself to the standard that was expected of her .

Which meant she had to preform those “wifely duties” she’d been told so much about.

Now her anxieties were returning in full force.

Would it hurt?

Other married women always whispered about those encounters when they were behind closed doors. Rin picked up only pieces of it, hearing how it hurt one, but another loved it. Some said it had to hurt to feel good. So… which was it?

Rin fiddled with her jewelry,  deciding to pull off her  necklace.  The gold  necklace p ooled in her hand, her fingers playing with the chain and small gold flower in hopes that it would distract her .

She really wished she’d done more before she was married. Maybe her husband wanted her more experienced ; or maybe if he found out she wasn’t a virgin he’d have thrown her away and called off the business arrangement.  Rin groaned, wishing there wasn’t so much uncertainty between them. It would seem she was in trouble either way . In all fairness, if she’d known more about  him and what he might want, she might have a better understanding of how to feel.

They’d known each other  since they were kids, but they never really  _ knew  _ each other. She always had a  lesson to attend and was needed elsewhere, while Sesshomaru  usually stuck very closely with his father, and attended every meeting his father and her father were in.  He would be cordial when they talked, but nothing more. Not that she never really did much to engage him. She so often spent her days off in her own little world he probably thought she was just weird. Hell, he probably still think s that . 

“My Lady?”

Rin guessed she needed to get used to her servants slipping in and out silently and get used to it quickly. She nearly jumped at the  voice calling for her. Her hand on her heart, Rin turned to the maid that was bowing low to  her.

“Lord Sesshomaru  has requested your company for dinner .”

“Oh! Yes, right!” Rin  walked towards the woman , “what’s for dinner?”

“My Lord has  had the cook whip up a marvelous roast of pheasant with roasted potatoes and  roasted vegetables ,” the maid informed Rin, “unless you’d like something else.”

“No… that sounds wonderful,” Rin said,  “let ’s be off, shall we.”

“This way  miss .”

Rin followed the maid down the hallways and staircase to the dining room , where a perfectly laid-out table  stood in the center , set with candles  being lit by her new husband.

“Lord Sesshomaru.”

On instinct, Rin  curtseyed along with her maid , feeling her cheeks burn the minute  her ankle bent .

“Um… how was work?” Rin asked, now trying to hide her faux pas .

“Fast,” Sesshomaru said, pulling her chair out for her .

The dinner smelt delicious, and Rin thanked the man who put her plate in front of her. As she put the napkin on her lap, Rin became aware that Sesshomaru was looking at his assistant, and was still working through dinner.

Turning instead to her dinner , Rin tucked into her pheasant .  She found the cook at her new home was rather spectacular. He knew to season well and  the meat was  perfectly cooked th r ough . There wasn’t a single blemish or  discoloration on  any of the vegetables and the cutlery was just as spotless. The only thing that could’ve made this meal more  delicious would be if the chef cooked the carrots in honey like her old cook used too.

That was it.

One stray thought and she was suddenly hit with homesickness worse than before. All of her hunger was suddenly gone and she was left staring at a plate of delicious food she couldn’t swallow .

She couldn’t just not eat.

“Um…”

Now Sesshomaru looked at her, his eyes studying her as she wiped  her mouth.

“What are the neighbors like?” Rin asked,  pushing the food around with her fork.

“I don’t know,” Sesshomaru said, “ they’re so far away I don’t see them and they don’t make their  presence known to me."

“So… we’re alone out here?” Rin aske d.

“for the most part, yes,” Sesshomaru turned back to Jaken for a moment, “as far as everyone else knows, we’re on our honeymoon, so no one will disturb us.”

“Oh,” Rin eyed the imp .

“Jaken will keep his mouth shut,” Sesshomaru answered her unasked question , the imp seemingly please with the praise .

“Do you live in, Jaken?”

“Lord Sesshomaru  has graciously rented me a cabin on the property ,” he announced , fluffing himself up higher.

“I see…”

Rin tried for a little while longer before she excused herself from the table, her meal left largely uneaten and the conversations having gone nowehere. She returned to the only place in the house she knew, choosing to slip into the bathroom and take off her overskirts and undo her corset. She knew there was a maid around to help her, but for now, she wanted to be left alone.

Her husband standing in the room surprised her.

“Oh!”

Sesshomaru was taken aback at her sudden outburst. He looked at her in  almost as much  surprise as Rin looked at him.

“Sorry,” Rin swallowed, “I didn’t expect you here.”

“You didn’t expect me here, in our  bed room?”

Rin felt stupid .

“Oh… right…”

“Is your stomach alright?”

The question took her aback.

“Pardon?”

“The way you left dinner made me think your stomach was bothering you.”

“Oh!” Rin shook her head, “no! Just… been an eventful day,” she wished it didn’t sound so bad coming from her mouth , “ I’m fine, thank you.”

“If you insist…”

“Excuse me a moment,” she nodded to him, turning the closet to  change into a  white nightgown.

It was silly, she supposed, to undress  away from her husband , but for now, she just wanted to keep some things to herself for as long as she could.

When she re-entered the room, Sesshomaru had pulled off his own jacket and pants, slipping the garments onto their hangers and organising himself for tomorrow. 

"Goodnight."

She felt like a little girl as she hurried to her side of the bed, rolled onto her side, threw the blanket over her, and turned off her light.

The wait was the longest part for Rin, her heart pounding in her chest and her stomach twisted in so many knots she felt nauseous.

Was she even ready?

Her anxieties returned in full force, remembering again how s ome of her married friends talked about sex  as both painful and wonderful, while others regarded it as a chore. Which was  i t supposed to be ? Why did it need to be either of those things? She was only twenty-two, but she was also one of the last of her friends to marry, and Sesshomaru was fo ur years her senior. When her friends heard who  she was betrothed too, they all told her that she had nothing to worry about, that he was experienced. What did that even mean?

Sesshomaru was surprisingly silent as he undressed and moved towards his side of the bed. The mattress adjusted to his weight and the covers slid over his body.

Rin waited.

She waited for him to roll over, to touch her, to kiss her.

To take her.

The young woman wondered if he could feel her heart beat through the mattress, the blood rushing through her ears and her breathing deep as she tried to calm herself down.

But t here was nothing.

Tentatively, she turned to look at the demon, his back to her and showed no signs of moving to her. She watched as his sides rose slowly up and down, Sesshomaru evidently trying to get as much sleep as he could for the following day.

She felt relief trickle into her.

Relief... and something more.

Did he really not want her? His own wife.

Tears pricked at the corners of her eyes.

Her husband didn’t want her. He’d taken her from his home, married her, and now he didn’t want her. Rin’s hand covered her mouth as she took deep breaths to calm her beating heart. This was not the time to weep. She needed to make peace with the life she had now . If she wanted to have her sanity intact she needed to accept this was her life.

Even if her husband  wanted nothing to do with her.

She hiccoughed only once before she bit her lip and clutched the pillowcase tightly. Her tears soaked the  expensive silk,  but she swore she wouldn’t make a sound. She wasn’t some sort of child anymore; this was the life that many other women like her led . If they could do it, so could she.

Rin managed, somehow, to fall into a deep sleep. The trip and the day exhausting her. She was in such a deep sleep that she didn’t feel the long fingers  that pulled her hair off her cheek so her husband could lean over and give her a gentle kiss.

Sesshomaru hated the taste of salt on his lips, but he knew that she’d been crying. Of course she would; she’d been ripped from her home and forced into the best of a bad situation. He leaned back onto his pillow. She really was here, lying next to him in his bed , and the only thing he wanted to do  was hold her in his arms. But he couldn’t. It would only hurt her more, and it  would irreparably harm any hope of  a descent relationship they might hope to have.

The demon rubbed his forehead, wondering if they had any hope to begin with. He took one last look of her before he turned over ;  hope or no, that wasn’t what going to make them work, but right now, he just wanted to see her smile again.


	3. Morning After

It was early when the brown eyes pushed open, the lids feeling heavy and her eyes sore. It only took her a moment  to remember that she was waking, for the first time, in her new home.

Swallowing thickly, she forced down the lump that was threatening to bubble up so early in the morning , her breathing deep as she steadied herself. Shuffling under the covers, she didn’ t want to get out of her bed, wishing to stay shrouded under the protection of the down comforter. It was a very nice home she was living in, and the bed she slept in was one of the most comfortable  she’d even been in.

She stretched, finding it odd when she bumped into something solid. Confused, she turned to find  her husband’s bare back by her hand. Given his shuffling, it was rather obvious she’d just  woke him up.

“Oh… OH!”

Now embarrassed, Rin instinctively covered her chest as Sesshomaru rolled over,  his face grumpy and frustrated.

“I am so sorry,” Rin apologized, “I-I didn’t mean to wake you—”

“Don’t  concern yourself over it ,” Sesshomaru said,  sitting up and rubbing his  forehead.

“H-How… did you sleep?” Rin asked, still nervous about having a man that was not a blood relative in her room , given how rudely she woke him.

“ Fine ,” he told her, “and yourself?”

“Okay,” she admitted, swallowing thickly, trying to ignore the gnawing hunger in her stomach . 

He stood slowly, wearing nothing but  pants on his lower half. Rin deliberately averted her eyes, trying not to stare at the demon’s physique.

Most of the men she’d been around were much hardier, not that she ever really went to sneak glances. Her husband, on the other hand, seemed to have carefully crafted his body. It was obvious from  how he woke up looking nearly picture perfect. 

“What… time is it?”

“Early,” Sesshomaru dressed quickly, pulling on a button-up over his form, “around  7:30.”

“Do you usually get up this early?”

“Earlier.”

Rin nodded, looking away as the demon walked into the bathroom to get dressed . As she was getting up and putting on her robe, h e emerged a few moments later, in a white button-up , vest, and black pants. He walked to the door, calling one of the servants to speak to them in low tones.

“Breakfast is ready for you downstairs,” he informed her, “get dressed.”

She was somewhat thrown at the curtness of his voice, her hand tightening on her robe.

“ Th -Thank you,” she nodded, moving slowly towards the closet .

“I’ll send for a maid to help you.”

She heard his footsteps soften before the door opened and closed behind him, leaving her alone once again. Somehow, she managed to breathe easier, the constriction on her heart loosening somewhat as she began to dress, interrupted by the knock at her door.

Growing up, Rin had never had a proper hand maid. It was always her mother that helped her into pretty dresses or a woman they had hired for the night. To have a woman standing  in front of her ready to help her with everything was entirely new.

“ Good Morning miss.”

The woman old, and had an eye patch over  her left eye. She seemed bent over , and was using a cane to help her walk. Straight hair was tied in a low ponytail on her back and her face was set in something of a scowl.

“I am Kaede,” the elderly woman bowed to Rin, “I’m your lady’s maid. Apologies for not greeting you yesterday; I wanted to give the happy couple a day to themselves.” 

Rin nodded , keeping quiet about how a woman bowing to her made her stomach flip. She supposed it was something she’d have to get used too.

“Is something wrong miss?”

“I’ve just… never had a lady’s maid before,” Rin explained, “so… this is all a little new to me.”

“What did ye do before?”

“My mother did most of it,” Rin said, “but we’d hire maids to help out on more special occasions.”

“I see…”

The old woman walked her way to the closet, pulling out one of Rin’s dresses from home while the young woman  came to sit on the edge of the b ed.

“I ’m here help you with your clothes,  make-up,  style your hair when you need it,” she eyed Rin’s mussed locks, “but I can also be your confidant and help you out with rules you might be unaware of.”

“Are you usually so straightforward?”

“ There is no other way to be child.”

Rin was dressed very quickly and efficiently , the woman clearly skilled. Her hair was slipped into her usual style, with one small ponytail on the side of her head and the rest of it was left long down her back. Feeling much fresher , Rin made her way down stairs , welcomed to a polished dining table and perfectly set out  cutlery and napkins. Sesshomaru was sitting at the table,  his nose buried in the day’s newspaper . He glanced up for a moment, pausing as he took in his wife’s appearance. While nothing was said, Rin really wished she’d given in to the old woman’s insistence that her hair be tied up in a looser style.

“I see you’ve met Kaede,” Sesshomaru  turned back to his paper.

“She’s lovely,” Rin said , sitting down .

“She’s an eccentric,” the demon looked back, “but she has years of experience.”

“Is that why you hired her?”

To this Sesshomaru didn’t respond . Instead, he turned to the  man who put down a cup of tea in front of him, and Rin watched as she was given a cup and a plate of  eggs and toast.

“Aren’t you going to eat anything?” Rin asked, thanking the servant for  her breakfast .

“Tea is all I need,” Sesshomaru said , “I’ll b e off .”

“Off?”

“ Work,” Sesshomaru stood and Jaken, who had been standing dutifully by his Lord, picked up his cup and saucer, “I have an office in the city, but I mainly work here .”

“And… you and your father work  with  commercial properties… right?” Rin asked, hoping to spend a  few more moments with him.

“We do,” Sesshomaru nodded, “ to make a  long story short, we’re land owners who lease for business practices, and we work closely with those we lease land too to make sure  everything is above board ,” he looked down at her, “how involved were you in your father’s business?”

“Not much,” Rin shrugged, “didn’t have time really. I’d visit the warehouse every now and then, but my father didn’t much l ike having his little girl walking around the  building in long skirts. ”

“My Lord—”

“I’m coming, Jaken,” to Rin,  “ m y office is the door at the end of the west wing,” Sesshomaru told her, “ I’ll ask that you not disturb me unless you need something .”

“Alright,” Rin nodded, hating that ‘yes sir ’ was about to come out of her mouth.

“The house is yours; feel free to explore it and walk around,” the demon said, turning to walk towards his office .

“Thank you…”

Rin was left alone, feeling suddenly very awkward and very lonely. A maid was still in the room, and  the servant who brought her  her breakfast was standing off to the side.  Eating what she could,  Rin left  at least half of her eggs  on her plate before she nodded to the staff and decided to explore her new home.

She was somewhat surprised that his house wasn’t lined with pictures of his ancestors. Then again, this wasn’t his ancestral home. Perhaps it was different at InuTaisho’s . Here he only had a few more prominent members, and closer to him.  There were, however, several artifacts, all looking to be from the same country of origin. If Rin had to guess, it would seem like the furs, swords, and armors were  all from his family history. Given how they had prominence  along the walls  and  had  an entire room to themselves, it would seem they were  of great importance to Sesshomaru. She paused below a pair of crossed swords,  reminiscing about  the family sword that held its place over her father’s mantle. Perhaps it wasn’t such a  big difference  she’d have to maneuver.

The gardens were just as massive. In the front it was perfectly stylized , and yet there was a touch of wildness about it. Ivy that crawled up the house didn’t have a single spot on the dark green leaves , and the bushes around the house were predominately roses.  The rest of the flowers that dotted the gardens were plants she’d never seen before, though there were some similarities to plants  she’d grown up with. Maybe she could learn which were which; he had to have a library, right? Rin continued her walk outside, coming across a stable and what she would assume were the servant’s quarters. Both stone buildings were easily accessible, but well-hidden  thanks to the multitudes of trees surrounding the property. As tempting as it was for her to see his horses, Rin  kept her curiosity at bay and turned back into the house, vowing to visit the stables before the  week was out.

A maid she ran into told her where the library was, and after getting lost  three times she finally managed to  find the large double doors. 

The library was huge. Rin craned her neck to look at the rows and rows of books that lined the walls. She drank the musky scent of books and  spines, letting her fingers run the outside of the books. There were ladders and separate floors, all filled with more books than she knew existed . The metal was a warm, yet warn brass set on a deep brown stained wood that got polished regularly. It was obvious there was a lot of time and care in this library . For the first time in the house there was evidence that someone  lived here. The tips of her fingers came to run over the lightly worn couch in front of the fireplace, feeling the short velvet move with her hand.

Where was she going to start?

“Knock  Knock !”

Startled from her thoughts, Rin  backed quickly from  the couch , her head turning until she saw her new father-in-law standing in the  doorway with a beaming smile on his face.

“Hope I’m not disturbing you,” the elder told her kindly, “the maid said you were in the  library .”

“Y-Yes,” Rin swallowed, taking a moment to gather her thoughts, “pardon me, Lord Takahashi,” she curtseyed low, “I should have-”

“There’s no need for the formalities,” the elder dog demon brushed aside, his hand pulling her up, lips to the soft flesh, “InuTaisho to you, my dear.”

“S-Sir...?”

“You’re family now,” InuTaisho pressed, “so I am not sir or Lord, just InuTaisho...”

“Th... That might be a little tricky,” Rin giggled nervously, “g-given that my father preferred ‘sir’ on occasion.”

“Ah yes,” the demon smiled, “he’s a military man yes?”

“That’s right,” the young woman nodded, “ I’m surprised you could tell... he hardly mentions it. ”

InuTaisho laughed at her joke , knowing full well that he was reminded of the man’s service every time the two met up. T he demon let her hand go, his own reaching around to pull something from his  pockets .

“I have something for you,” he told her teasingly, his hands holding out a finely wrapped package of colourful pieces of sweets.

“O... Oh...”

“Candied fruits,” the man announced proudly, “your father mentioned you were fond of them.”

“Y-Yes... I am,” Rin nodded, still slightly stunned, “ th. .. thank you.”

“It’s no trouble,” InuTaisho smiled, “I never had a daughter to dote on, so this is such fun for me.”

“My father might fight you for that right,” the young woman teased, her body lowering to place the candy on the  coffee  table  in front of the couch , her eyes growing wide as she caught her reflection in the polished wood .

“Don’t worry about your hair,” the demon chuckled at her frantic patting and pulling, “ your father is right about that, it looks much better down.”

Blushing, Rin looked back to the elder who had sat on the couch, indicating for her to join him.

“S o tell me; which on is your favorite?”

“Oh tell me; which on is your favorite?", her hands clasped in front of her and nerrvousness over ! U-Um... I like the lemon... and the orange, but the ginger helps when my stomach is bothering me.”

“They smelt divine,” InuTaisho agreed, his body  leaning over to look at the candies, his hand patting the cushion beside him, “would  you  care to join me?”

Nodding, Rin moved towards him, her hands grabbing the bag of sweets first.

“Would you care for one?” the young woman offered, the demon smiling as he reached in to take a cherry.

“Thank you,” he smiled, “have some with me.”

“Not right now,” Rin shook her head, “I’m… not very hungry…”

Amber eyes looked over the young woman, his jaw tightening slightly before he took a sip of his scotch.

“Do you often fast in times of high stress?”

Brown eyes looked to the elder, his eyes kind as his hand reached to pat hers.

“I’m not belittling you,” the demon told her gently, “and I understand this is a very hard time for you.”

Her breath was deep as she steadied her nerves, her hands tightening around the bag,

“I am sorry for making you worry,” Rin finally found her voice, “but I’m fine; really I am.”

Pulling back, InuTaisho nodded, understanding that she was not willing to admit her weakness, that her training as a Lady kept her head high and her pain hidden.

“So tell me,” the demon started, “how have the Western Lands been treating you?”

“Very well, thank you,” the young woman started to perk up, “the nature around here is amazing; there’re so many new species for me to learn about , and Sesshomaru has an entire forest on his doorstep .”

“That’s wonderful,” InuTaisho smiled, “Sesshomaru should have a plethora of encyclopaedias on the matter.”

“ Think there are a few books around ,” Rin admitted, “but his libraries are so vast… ” she gestured to the books around her, “ I hardly know where to start.”

“Well, whenever there’s a rainy day, you let me know and we’ll spend an afternoon looking for a few books,” the demon promised, his warmth infecting Rin and coaxing out a small smile. “Well now,” InuTaisho grinned, “you  _ do  _ know how to smile!”

“It has been a while,” Rin admitted, “but thank you… for your kindness.”

“Of course,” the elder demon patted her leg, “you’re family now; despite my son’s appearance, we do care for each other.”

Nodding to the elder, the young woman bowed her head to him, her hand covering his own, the first little bit of happiness blooming in her chest.

“Unfortunately, I need to visit my son for a moment,” he gently stood, “but I’ll stop by to  say farewell… and  maybe  help you get a start on those books,” he gestured to the small section towards the corner on an upper platform, “try the green section; most of his books are  color -coded.”

She  looked where the demon pointed and smiled up at him before she took his suggestion and walked over to the row of forest green spines . InuTaisho smiled at her excitement as he left her to her research .  He strode down the hall before his knuckles rapped on the  heavy oak door to Sesshomaru’s study.

“Come in.”

“Good  afternoon Sesshomaru.”

The younger demon lifted his head to his father, InuTaisho holding the door open and standing casually.

“Jaken, do you mind?”

“We’re in the middle of—”

“Jaken.”

The imp didn’t protest as he shuffled out the door, encouraged by Sesshomaru’s  tone .

“What are you doing here?” Sesshomaru asked, his father shutting the door.

“ I came to see you, and my new daughter-in-law,” he explained,  “I would think you’d be enjoying married life,” InuTaisho said, “ given that you’ve been married for… twenty-four hours now?”

“What of it?” Sesshomaru asked, keeping his eyes on his papers.

“It means you’re a married man… with a young wife that has no idea of what to do with herself in a big h ouse she can’t call a home,” he gently pulled away that stack of files, “go enjoy your honeymoon. These will keep for a week, as they’re supposed too.”

“If I get them signed now,  I can be a week ahead—”

“What  good is being a week ahead if you never take a week off ? ”

Sesshomaru finally stopped. Putting his pen down, he leaned back in his chair and met his father’s stern gaze.

“You’re married; stop working, and  spend this week with her like you should.”

“I’m letting her get adjusted to  life here,” Sesshomaru said, “she needs time.”

“She needs a friend.”

“Isn’t that why you’re here?”

“I’m here to be an ear if she, or you, need one,” InuTaisho said, “ but I’m not her friend, not in the same way you can be.”

“Jaken—”

“Be serious.”

“I can’t throw her into this life—”

“Too late.”

“Father…”

“What’s done is done,” InuTaisho crossed his arms, “the only thing now is to start looking forward, with her. She’s here, and you’re not with her right now. ”

“What the Hell am I supposed to do?”

“Talk to her?” InuTaisho said incredulously , “ ask her how she’s doing?”

“She doesn’t want to talk to  me,” Sesshomaru said .

“You know this because you asked her?”

It was obvious InuTaisho was getting nowhere with his  son, and Sesshomaru’s stubbornness wasn’t helping the situation.

“If you keep assuming how she feels, you’ll only make those problems you think you created worse ,” InuTaisho reminded him,  turning to the door, “I’m not about to babysit you and hold your hand through this; you got yourself here, now it’s your responsibility  to make her happy. If you don’t know how, learn.”

The demon left his younger to his work, sighing once the door shut behind him.  There was no way his son was going to do anythin g when it came to talking about his feelings. He’d never done that. Even as a child he wouldn’t admit to  his own father that he had a crush on a girl. Sesshomaru never had to learn  how to express himself, and since InuTaisho felt he would wind up with a woman very much unlike Rin,  he didn’t push it as much as he should have.

InuTaisho peeked in to the library , smiling at the young woman sitting with a book in her lap and was absent-mindedly snacking on some of the candied fruit , only a piece at a time, but it was a start.

“Rin.”

She sat up straighter,  smiling to her father-in-law.

“I’ll be taking my leave,” InuTaisho said, “ I’ll have the maids send you up some te a,” he paused for a moment, “it was wonderful to see you again.”

“You could always join me,” Rin said, hope in her voice.

“I’m afraid I can’t,” he smiled sadly, “ Sesshomaru should come out and join you soon , or at least come out and bring you to dinner .”

“Okay…” she seemed somewhat dejected, “do you want me to walk you out?”

“Oh no!” InuTaisho walked up to her and gave her a  warm hug, “it was wonderful to see you; I’ll call on you both again sometime soon when I’m freer, okay?”

“Alright,” Rin smiled, hugging back , “safe travels.”

The demon left them to themselves, Rin in the library and Sesshomaru in his office where he remained until a maid called him for dinner. He figured he’d stop by to pick up his wife, and found it odd when she didn’t respond to him calling her.

“Rin,” Sesshomaru called again, “it’s  time for dinner -”

He stopped speaking as soon as her figure came into view . She was on the couch,  feet still to the floor and her head on a pillow by the armrest . There was a book open on her  stoamch and one hand by her face. Sesshomaru moved silently towards her , noticing her eyes closed and her breathing slow and deep. The demon stepped  towards the couch , his amber eyes watching as she silently slept.

Of course she was tired.

She was trying so hard to make things work for her.

For them.

His face softened slightly.

She wanted to be happy. That was it; a simplistic desire for a woman who now had access to almost anything with a price tag.

And she wanted what she could not have with him.

Carefully, the demon slipped his arm under her legs and back, her figure fitting comfortably in his arms. Amber eyes looked down at her, her head coming to rest on his chest and her body seemingly smaller in his arms.

She seemed to weigh almost nothing to him . Given how little she’d ea ten  of her first day of being here, it would only get worse.

Could it kill her?

He carried her gently to their bedroom, Rin hardly stirring  during the walk.  Sesshomaru was careful as he placed her on the mattress, the pillow sinking to accommodate her head. Gently, the demon reached to untie her boots, her dress loose enough the demon did not need to call in a maid to help her out of her skirts but he did gently loosen her corset , just enough that it wouldn’t hurt her if she slept in it.

Sesshomaru pulled the covers over his wife’s sleeping body, his own deciding to sit by her for a moment longer. Curious, the demon reached out to run the back of his fingers over her cheek, his face impassive as she barely reacted to his touch.

The stress was just too much for her. 

The demon wasn’t a stupid man. He heard her on the other side of the bed, tossing and turning, sighing, and being kept  up only due to her anxiety.

Perhaps she wasn’t even ready to call this place home.

Before even coming here she studied in preparation , changing her etiquette skills to meet the higher standards, learning her new family tree branches, new locations and attractions in the area, people and their family history and was essentially taking courses to not embarrass herself or her new husband. All she wanted was to be happy and to get to enjoy her life as it came.

The demon felt she was born in the wrong class for such a desire.

Or perhaps she was born into the wrong time.

She was smart and skilled; were she a man, she would easily be a contender for her father’s business ventures. From his experience with her and her family, they could hold their own in debates and discussions with those thought to be of higher class and the deals they made usually benefited them outright without any underhanded means. Had it been a time where women could hold such positions, the demon doubted they’d have ever been married.

Kissing her temples gently, Sesshomaru noticed a n unfortunate pattern starting to form . He left her  in their room to sleep and when he finished his work hours  later, he came back to Kaede holding her corset and was working on her heavier skirts.

“She shouldn’t sleep in this,” the woman held the corset up, “even loose it’ll be a problem.”

“Kaede—”

“I must be off,” she nodded to Sesshomaru,  now having Rin’s heavier skirt over her arm,  “good night, my Lord.”

“ Hn ,” Sesshomaru nods .

“She’s a good girl,” the elderly woman commented, “ smart too;  t’would be a pity for someone to treat  her with indifference.”

Sesshomaru said nothing as the woman passed by  him , leaving the demon to stand alone in his room with his sleeping wife .  Both her and her father’s words were rattling around in his ears , and left him feeling more frustrated then he’d been in years.


	4. Introduction

“Quit struggling...” 

“I’m not struggling,” Rin pouted, “it’s just- _ow_!” 

“Sit up!” 

Rin whimpered as she did as her maid said. Pushing her chest out and straightening her back, Rin bit her lip as the old woman pulled and tightened the coils and braids in her hair. 

Getting ready for a dance was less fun as she got older. 

Nervous didn’t even begin to cover her feelings on her first official introduction to society. Her dress was new and to have someone fuss over her hair like Kaede was was not helping her situation either. There were just so many ways this could go wrong. 

“Alright,” Kaede took a step back, “we’re done.” 

A light coat slipped over the carefully tightened dress and the perfectly curled hair was pulled over the back and collar of the white coat her seamstress had made specifically for her and her dress. Bowing low and silently exiting the room, her maid left her to herself, Rin staring at the woman in the full-length mirror. She hardly recognized her own face and body. Not that the maid had overdone it on the make-up, she’d used barely any on her, but there was still something about her she didn’t recognize. 

And a part of her found that thrilling. 

It was nice to finally see herself as a woman, not a little girl. 

“You look beautiful dear,” Kaede said, cleaning up the vanity, “come now; your husband is waiting.” 

Rin tightened her coat around her body, straightened up, and made her way to the font hall with Kaede walking beside her. 

Sesshomaru was talking to the imp beside him about some business matter. The two were conversing in such low tones that the young woman had difficulty hearing. She descended the stairs all ready to go only to find the demon was waiting for her. Embarrassed at her tardiness, Rin began to apologize before the demon held his hand up, silencing her. He explained she wasn’t intruding on their schedule, as he intended to arrive fashionably late to the party. 

They loaded up into the carriage and set off towards the party in silence, a running theme Rin had quickly grown to hate. She sat up straighter, determined not to feel sorry for herself. She was off to an extravagant party with a handsome husband. Rin snuck a glance to the man seated next to her, knowing that he wasn’t as perfect as everyone made him out to be. What if she said the wrong thing? What if she accidentally revealed absolutely everything he didn’t want coming to light? Could she even do that? Did she even know that much about him? 

“Relax, Rin.” 

Her body jerked for a moment, surprised at his words. 

“How did you—” 

“You always start to breathe heavier when you’re thinking too much,” Sesshomaru said, “it’s just a ball.” 

Rin silently agreed, looking out the window at the passing houses and trees. Sesshomaru wasn’t going to do much to calm her nervousness; if anything, he only made it worse by being so passé about the whole thing. 

She just didn’t want to embarrass anyone. 

Their arrival was met with beautiful lanterns and perfectly styled footman that greeted the multitude of carriages and ladies. It was the demon, not a footman, that met her at the door. His hand extended to her, Sesshomaru remained cool and composed as he helped her down the carriage steps. 

The ascended the steps in unison, the doorman greeting them with a low bow. Rin was quiet as she removed her coat and handed it to the waiting servant. Swallowing her nervousness, she turned to the demon who was now looking over her dress for the first time in the night. 

Amber eyes roamed the champagne-coloured dress, from the bodice made up of beading that trailed down over her skirts to the light chiffon skirt that seemed to float around her feet. Her hair was up in a low knot and her shoulders were only covered by the straps that exposed her collarbones and were tempted to slip down to her arms. 

“You look good.” 

She seemed slightly taken aback at his comment. Remembering her training as a lady, she composed herself quickly before responding. 

“So do you.” 

The young woman wasn’t simply returning the curtesy. His suit was well-fitted to his strong form and was a deep black. The bowtie was neat and symmetrical and his cufflinks showed his family crest in ornate gold. 

“Shall we?” 

Wishing her hand would stop shaking, she slipped it through his arm, he holding her close to his body as the two began walking down that curved staircase. 

Rin became very apparent about the eyes that started to turn to look up at her. There, with one of the most elite demons in the Western Lands, was a woman no one had ever heard of. Praying that her clumsiness would stay at bay for the descent, the young woman took strength from her husband, grateful that he was always so composed in these matters. 

Brown eyes turned to look at the men and woman that milled around her, some glancing to look at her for as long as societal norms allowed while others stopped and stared, whispers shot into their partner’s ears. Rin’s head bowed slightly as she tried to keep up with the demon beside her, her hand squeezing his arm out of anxiety. It should’ve come as no surprise that people were staring at her; she was a Takahashi now, after all, and married to one of the most sought after men in the country. Still, she’d never had this much attention on her at once, and all of it felt unnerving. 

“Drink?” 

The young woman looked up to the waiting shyly offering them glasses of wine on a tray. Unable to speak, Rin nodded, her free hand accepting the drink along with her husband. 

“Relax,” Sesshomaru said again, his voice low enough that only the young woman could hear him, “you’re too tense.” 

“My apologies,” Rin replied, “I’m just... not used to all of this.” 

“No one ever is,” the demon pointed out dryly, “just ignore them.” 

“Easier said than done,” the young woman whispered, taking a slow drink. 

“Just remember to breathe,” Sesshomaru told her, “their opinions don’t matter anyways.” 

The young woman nodded, wondering if his words came from a place of encouragement or frustration at her naïveté. 

She had never even been to such an extravagant place, let alone invited to a party where the dresses alone could fetch a small fortune, with the jewels around necks it could make a peasant a Lord overnight. Her eyes snuck glances to Sesshomaru, impressed at his calm and poise, greeting the others with nods and a smile. 

This was a different man than the one she’d spent two weeks with. 

“Congratulations on your marriage!” 

The statement brought Rin right back to reality. She looked to the demon that was eagerly shaking Sesshomaru’s hand. 

“It’s a shame to see you fall from our noble bachelor ranks, but I guess that means broken hearts for us to comfort,” the white smile flashed to Rin, “you won’t believe how many women sobbed when they learned he was married.” 

“Oh...” 

“He’s exaggerating,” all of Sesshomaru’s charm was gone now. 

“Hardly,” there was now joy in his laugher, “I had three come confirm to me if those rumours about you were true today alone!” 

“Whatever would you people do without rumours,” Sesshomaru whispered, Rin barely catching it when a woman started to vie for Rin’s attention. 

“How are you enjoying the West?” the lady asked, her perfectly styled hair bouncing with excitement. 

“It’s beautiful,” Rin smiled, “I feel like I could spend an eternity learning about this place and still not know everything.” 

“Several scholars have figured that out the hard way,” the man beside her joked, his salt and pepper walrus moustache twitching as he spoke, “but there are still several volumes published about the geography and history of this place; I could give you a list if you’d like.” 

“Oh that’d be lovely,” the young woman smiled, “thank you.” 

“I’m sure your Lord husband has them all,” a glass was lifted to Sesshomaru. 

“Not all,” Sesshomaru corrected, “there are three that are going to be published this year.” 

Laughter rippled through the men; Rin slightly surprised that her husband could be so charismatic. 

“Rin, yes?” one of the women interjected, “will we be seeing more of you?” 

“I think so,” Rin looked to Sesshomaru, “I’m not sure really; everything’s still so new.” 

“The dances here are always marvellous!” the woman’s blue eyes practically sparked with excitement, “everything’s done so extravagantly too! Especially the coming of age dances,” her red lips smiled warmly, “what was your like?” 

“O-Oh,” Rin stammered slightly, her face flushing as she felt all eyes, including her husband’s on hers, “I... I never really had one, so I couldn’t tell you...” 

“No?” the woman seemed shocked, “why ever not?” 

“My... my mother passed a few days before I was set to come out,” Rin explained, her throat swallowing thickly, “so I needed time to mourn her and have the funeral... and then I just... never got around to it.” 

“Oh you poor thing...” 

Rin felt uncomfortable at the comment. She knew she meant well, but it came off as pity rather than empathetic. 

“Will you excuse us?” Sesshomaru stepped in, gently pulling Rin along. 

She caught on quickly, learning that Sesshomaru liked to shake hands with many people, but not liger for long. It was the exact opposite from her father, who was so charismatic but selective in the company he kept. With Sesshomaru, it was obvious men and women wanted to be around him because of the way he carried himself and his status. Unlike others, Sesshomaru seemed to know it. Most of the people she met were cordial, and others wanted to have her over for tea and lunch. 

“Rin! Oh Rin!” 

A young woman caught her attention from the other side of the room. The lace glove was waving her over, beckoning the young woman away from her husband. She looked from one to the other, moving quietly at Sesshomaru’s tight-lipped nod. Rin cautiously moved towards the others, her eyes glancing nervously to her husband who seemed to be enjoying the conversation with the other businessmen. 

“So tell us,” one of the women seemed to giggle with excitement, her face turning red with the embarrassment the question brought, “how.... how is he?” 

“How... is he?” Rin repeated, her eyebrow raising, “I... I’m afraid I don’t quiet understand...” 

“Your husband,” the young woman asked again, “how is he,” her neck craned to look at him, “you know... in bed?” 

At this Rin went red, her heart hammering loudly in her chest and her nerves burning in her throat. She swallowed thickly, wondering how she could possibly talk about the matter if they had never actually _had_ sex before. 

“I... I...” 

“Oh come on!” another harmlessly encouraged, “please tell us! We’re all just _dying_ to know!” 

“Well... that is... I-” Rin swallowed thickly at the questions, “u-um...” 

“Please Rin?” the other gently begged, “just give us a hint at least!” 

“I-uh-” 

“A woman must never kiss and tell ladies.” 

All three women turned their heads to the approaching elder, her wide hips sashaying as she marched determinedly to them, her wavy raven hair swept to one side of her head and covered half her face. Her purple mermaid dress matched with purple gloves and even a purple lipstick, which was now curled up into a knowing grin. 

“And you should never tell where he kisses,” the woman winked with a smirk, “besides, she’s still very new to all this boring well-to-do lifestyle,” her brown eyes looked down at Rin, “must give her a moment longer to be used to us gossiping ladies.” 

“Such a spoil-sport!” one of them teased, their eyes turning back to Rin, “but you must tell us at _some_ point! Perhaps over tea!” 

“Tea sounds lovely,” Rin was grateful for the interruption’s ability to let her gather her bearings, “but I prefer to keep myself to myself.” 

“Oh of course!” one seemed to just now realize their implications, “we were only joking around-” 

“It’s fine,” the young woman brushed off, “but... this is still all so new-” 

“We’ll get you used to fun parties and fine wine in no time,” the elder slipped in, her hand touching Rin’s shoulder, “speaking of; would you care to try one? My husband has generously donated one of my favourites and I believe you have yet to try it.” 

“I’d love too,” Rin smiled, excusing herself from the group and following after the woman dressed in dark blue. 

“I hope these parties aren’t too overwhelming,” the woman smiled, handing Rin a glass of white wine. 

“Oh no,” Rin half-lied, “it’s absolutely stunning.” 

“It is, isn’t it,” black hair lifted to the high ceilings and gold accents, “they must spend a fortune on parties alone.” 

“Can they afford that?” 

“Given how many deals they make at these events, I’d say so,” she leaned down to whisper to Rin, “best place to have a private conversation; in the middle of a party.” 

Rin smiled, taking a sip of the rather dry white wine. 

“You must be craving that life in the mountains right now.” 

The air around Rin went cool. Carefully, Rin licked her lips and looked around for her husband, who was still conversing with the men she’d left him with. 

“What I miss is home,” Rin did her best to hold in the tears, “but it’s wherever I make it, so I’ll try and make it here.” 

At this the tall-raven haired woman genuinely smiled, her gloved hand extended to Rin. 

“Then we’ll help you,” she promised, “I am Madame Bernard,” she added a French accent to the words, “my husband is Monsuir Bernard isFrench accent to the words, ", her gloved hand extended to Rin.the embarassment the question brought; the gentleman over there.” 

Rin followed her gesture, and her eyes settled on a short man with a rounded stomach laughing joyously at something his compatriot was saying. He was balding, but the hair that was left was jet black and slicked down to his head. His pince-nez were perched on his rather long nose. 

“Oh,” Rin didn’t know what to say, “he’s—" 

“Yes yes I know,” she waved the air around her, “pretty lady only after money,” she sighed, “but honestly,” she turned to him and smiled, “he’s the only man who sought me for a brain rather than a body...” she looked to Rin, “and he’s the only man who’s ever tried to make me smile and succeed.” 

“I wasn’t judging,” Rin said kindly. 

“Besides which,” Madame continued, “happy marriages are rare around here...” 

“That doesn’t surprise me...” 

Madame looked down at her, Rin finding her fingers tightening on the glass. 

“Don’t let how the people around here act fool you,” she whispered, squeezing Rin’s shoulder, “and don’t let how he acts fool you either. He’s just a product of his environment.” 

“I... suppose...” 

“ _Ladies and Gentlemen_ ,” the crowd turned to an announcer who stood in the hall, “ _we are opening the ballroom and invite you to join us for a dance_.” 

Dancing... 

Excited, Rin looked back up to where her husband had been, surprised when she couldn’t find him. 

“Will you excuse me,” Rin apologized as she started to look for Sesshomaru. 

“Of course,” her elder nodded, “we’ll call on you for lunch sometime, yes? Or tea?” 

“That would be lovely,” Rin bowed to her, “till then.” 

She moved through the crowds, passing couples and groups chattering away about some sort of business deal or new exterior on a house. Somewhat surprised that she couldn’t find her husband in and amongst the businessmen, she wondered if she should try to find her hosts, not that she knew who they were. 

Rin turned to the balcony, confused when she saw her husband slip in from the double doors. 

“Sesshomaru?” 

The demon turned to look at her, his brows raising in response. 

“What were you doing out there?” Rin asked him, her neck craning to try and get a glance of another person. 

“Working through an agreement,” Sesshomaru murmured, his hand coming to her back and guiding her away from the glass doors, “was there something you needed?” 

“Oh! Um...” she turned red as she tried to find an answer, “they’ve... started to open the ballroom,” she swallowed thickly, “and... I was wondering, if-” 

“I don’t dance.” 

Rin stopped short, her eyes turning to meet her husband’s. 

“O-Oh?” the young woman asked, her heart sinking at the thought. 

“I find it to be a waste of time,” he told her bluntly, “why do you ask?” 

“Because... I was sort of hoping _we_ could have a dance,” she mumbled after a moment, thumbs twiddling away. 

“As I said, I find it to be a waste of time,” the demon responded. 

“Right,” Rin nodded, taking his outstretched arm and walking sombrely in step. 

She loved dancing. 

Her father would always take her, from the time when she was so small she needed to stand on his shoes to knowing the steps to her farewell party, when she could feel better than adequate. 

Now she just wanted to feel normal. 

“Come on,” Sesshomaru said, “an associate of mine would like to meet you personally.” 

Rin nodded as she followed him. She tried not to look at the women spinning in beautiful gowns with bright smiles on their faces and their husband’s arms around their waists. 

“Lord Sesshomaru.” 

Sesshomaru’s name brought her back to reality. They were now standing in front of a man with long wavy black hair tied up in a half-ponytail. He was dressed to the nines, and had a smile that didn’t quite reach his blood red eyes. 

“So this is who you’ve been hiding,” he practically purred, “I thought we were closer than that.” 

“You’d be wrong,” Sesshomaru said. 

Rin had never seen the demon so tense, and it only got worse when Naraku took her hand and bent over to kiss her knuckles. 

“Your husband has this nasty habit of mumbling,” Naraku laughed, “and he likes to joke around,” he stood up straight, Rin’s hand still in his, “it’s an honour to meet you in person, my dear. My name is Naraku Onishi.” 

“It’s a pleasure,” Rin nodded, keeping her eye on Sesshomaru. 

“You are more beautiful than those rumours let on,” Naraku’s smile didn’t reach his eyes, “I hope this place becomes a home for you. So many others get lost on their way here, and never find their way back out.” 

Rin felt cold. The hand around hers was uncomfortably tight and she suddenly felt like breathing was getting harder. 

“This place can be intimidating,” he patted Rin’s hand for emphasis, “if there’s anything you ever need, please don’t hesitate to call on me.” 

“Thank you, for your generosity,” Rin curtseyed to him, pulling her hand back as subtly as she could to grab her skirt. 

“She’s more charming than you let on,” Naraku turned to Sesshomaru, “you must make sure not to hide her away like the precious treasure she is.” 

“You’re contradicting yourself,” Sesshomaru said through gritted teeth, “is she meant to be a precious treasure, or am I not supposed to hide her away?” 

“Treasures are only enjoyed when they’re on display,” Naraku wouldn’t stop smiling, “aren’t they, my dear.” 

“I... suppose,” Rin was really not comfortable with the conversation, “but... that would assume I’m property...” 

“Too right,” if Rin found Naraku’s smile to be unnerving, his laugh was even worse, “it wasn’t like your marriage was part of some business arrangement.” 

Rin fell silent at his laugher, wondering just how much Sesshomaru had said about her. 

“Forgive me,” Naraku smiled down at her, “he and I tend to joke a lot, seeing as I was going to be his brother-in-law, before you came along,” he looked from one to the other, “well, don’t let me stop you from enjoying your night,” he nodded to the both of them, “My Lord,” he paused, and then, “My Lady.” 

Rin felt her husband stiffen next to her as Naraku passed him by. He said nothing to her but kept his head high and continued to move forward and meet another one of his business associates. It was the pattern they kept up for the rest of the night, only leaving when the party started to get more and more rowdy. Rin didn’t protest as she was brought back into the carriage and taken home, her sore feet grateful to have a rest. Once at home, Sesshomaru waited as the hand maids helped Rin out of her corsets and hoop skirt. They were carried them to their proper places and bowing to the Lord and Lady as they left. Rin stepped out in a simple white nightgown, now becoming more comfortable around the demon in the bedroom. The demon paused to look her over before he turned to his dresser and she slipped under the covers and grabbed her book. 

“What you told some of the other guests,” the demon started, “about you not having an introduction ball.” 

“What about it?” Rin asked, taking off her earrings. 

“I’d rather you not admit that to anyone else,” Sesshomaru murmured, “though I suspect you won’t have too.” 

“I... beg your-” 

“A true Lady is supposed to be introduced to society at a young age, not as a wife,” the demon explained, “it is not a good for your image if you haven’t had a coming of age ball.” 

“I... apologize,” Rin swallowed thickly, “but I was only being honest. Would you rather I lie?” 

She could see his jaw tightening at the words, his stubborn pride keeping him from admitting she could be right. 

“You should also stay away from Naraku and his siblings.” 

Rin turned to look at the demon taking off his cufflinks. 

“Alright.” 

Sesshomaru seemed surprised by her acceptance. 

“Just like that?” 

She looked up from her book. 

“What do you mean?” 

“You protested when I asked you not to talk about your coming out dance, but this—" 

“There was something... not right about him,” Rin said, “it was unsettling.” 

“That’s a word for it,” Sesshomaru agreed, “he’s tried to screw me over in the past; gotten pretty close too.” 

“What did he do?” 

“It’s a long story,” the demon said, “Naraku’s family came into their money through less than honest means. No one can prove anything, but a lot of things just don’t add up. He’s done everything he can to legitimize his name, from the circles he runs in to the people he manipulates. He’s cleverer than I gave him credit for, and you need to be careful around him.” 

Rin nodded, thinking back to what Naraku had said about her and their marriage. 

“If he wants legitimacy... why doesn’t he get a wife with an old name?” 

“As far as I know, he’s tried, but he hadn’t had success,” he looked to her as he turned down his lamp, “old names have a way of knowing who rats are.” 

“I suppose...” 

She knew he was right, but there was so much Naraku had suggested to her in one night it was hard to sort things out. He seemed intelligent, and worse, he seemed to enjoy lording it over other people, her and her husband included. 

“How much... do people know?” Rin asked as Sesshomaru settled into bed next to her, “about our marriage.” 

“Nothing unless you tell them,” he said, “why?” 

“Did you tell them... about the arrangement—” 

“Most know it was an arranged marriage,” Sesshomaru said, “it’s the only way I’d marry...” 

“A human?” Rin finished for him, surprised that Sesshomaru seemed somewhat embarrassed by his comment. 

“Yes,” he said, “and most know your father and mine are business associates and that our business got stronger thanks to our marriage, but other than that, they don’t know all the details.” 

“Ah.” 

“Did Naraku’s comment upset you?” 

Rin put a bookmark in her pages and put her novel away for the night. 

“It was just... not fun,” Rin admitted, “to have to stand there and have him make those accusations... and the fact that he was accurate too.” 

“Like I said, Naraku has a way of knowing things people want secret,” Sesshomaru said, “even if he’s right, try not to let it bother you. Most of the time he’s fishing.” 

“Well he landed one,” she sank into the pillow, “makes me wonder how he knew and what else he knows.” 

“Don’t let it bother you; you’ll be at it forever,” he leaned over to his lamp, “are you done?” 

“Yes... I’m tired,” Rin said, turning off her own lamp and let the room settle into darkness. 

Again, Sesshomaru kept himself to himself, though the bruise to her ego was becoming less and less with each day they did nothing. It would seem her fears about sex were all for naught as her husband apparently had no interest in her. 

“Hey... Sesshomaru?” 

“Hm?” 

Rin paused, the question nagging at the back of her mind since Naraku said it in passing. 

“What did Naraku mean, when he said the two of you were going to be brother-in-laws?” 

“It doesn’t concern you.” 

She gathered from his tone that that’s where he wanted to leave it. A part of her wanted to press it more, but another part of her didn’t want to cause friction between them. Though, she supposed, friction was going to come, ironically, from avoiding it. 


	5. Walk in the Woods

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm only just now realizing how long these chapters are! Oops! I swear I don't mean too :P

Rin sighed as she sipped her tea, her fingers running along the lip of the expensive china that was used for regular day-to-day  operations. In her house, this was something that revered guests  were treated too and  perhaps for a  special  occasion or holiday.

She wasn’t used to being so well-off.

Every surface in the house was  covered in so met hing trimmed with real gold and could afford t o feed a small army for a month at least. The little artifacts scattered about the house  w ere equally as grand, their destinations unique and varied.  Desert scarabs,  carvings from century old  trees, jade from ancient palaces, and  gold and silver ornaments, just to name a few.

Rin was certain  there was a story behind each one, each  piece holding a tale  of their own that the young woman wished desperately to hear.

If only Sesshomaru would spend a moment with her.

She had lived here for a few weeks at most, and still knew almost nothing  about the location or the people around her. His librarie s were so vast Rin hardly knew  where to start looking for books, despite InuTaisho’s invitation to help her , and she ’d barely interacted with a single soul outside of her husband and their servants, though the latter h ad more to do with Sesshomaru insisting on their privacy. According to the  gossip ,  it was all because she and Sesshomaru  couldn’t keep his hands off of her . In truth, she and the demon hardly look at each other let alone touch.

Not that Rin particularly minded.

Her husband was a handsome man, and she  was no ignorant child, she knew about his reputation with women.

She also knew about her base desires.

It was difficult, not to have a mother to talk too about these things,  but then again, one might not talk to anyone about those sorts of things. Rin knew she had sexual desires, and knew there were ways of  self-pleasure .

And she also knew that she was curious about the touch of a man.

But she knew that she would not  enjoy discovering passions when she was still so anxious and  her emotions were  so unsteady. 

Groaning, Rin rubbed her  eyes and stared blankly out at the window.  Was she trying too hard? Maybe it was just Sesshomaru. Maybe it was all her.

There had to be something he liked to do aside from work.

Rin walked slowly around the house, her  eyes peering into every room to try and gather as much information as she could about her husband.

There were so many  books in her new house; perhaps he liked to  read? But everything else in this house was for show, so it would not be completely  out of li ne to assume the books were too.

What else?

She doubted any of the servants knew what their master did on his day off, the demon  being so silen t none of the m had even heard him move  until he seemingly appeared in a room, often behind them, often when they were chatting or doing something they weren’t supposed too. Did he even take days off?

There were stables, and he had many fine animals, though again, she had never seen him ride one, and assumed it was mainly for show. There were gardens, but it was in the middle of summer and everything was tended too by gardeners. She already knew he liked reading, but most of the books were  reference material, none of the fairy tails or romance or mystery novels she’d brought from home.

Perhaps she could try and simply ask him.

Newly determined, the young woman stood, her hands gathering her skirts and her body moving towards his study, a glance at the clock telling her that the markets had closed  for the day and the demon would likely be free.

She had never actually been in his study, only glanced at it while taking a brief tour of the house . The door was massive and heavy, and Rin felt nervous knocking at the heavy wood.

“Come in.”

The door creaked open and Rin took in the study for the first time since her tour.  More books  and shelves  lined the walls behind the demon and his large antique desk. The carpet was a deep red and the cushion that lined the bay window he had was just as dark. There were two large armchairs in front of his desk and  the walls were  paneled with a rich wood.

“Sesshomaru ?”

The demon seemed as unaccustomed to hearing his name without honorifics as she was saying it, his eyebrow raising as he turned to face his still new wife.

“Sesshomaru,” Rin  tried anew, her ears tinged with red, “if you’re done with work… it’s a beautiful day … so perhaps we could go for a walk?”

Sesshomaru’s jaw visibly tightened at her words, Rin’s optimism fading quickly as she tried not to wither under his steely gaze.

“I am not done with work,” Sesshomaru told her, “my business doesn’t have set hours; I work when others request it.”

“Right,” the young woman nodded, her teeth pulling on her lower lip, “ so… d-do you think you could take a break at some point-”

“It would be unprofessional of me to do such a thing,” the demon cut her off, “ people are exp ecting me to be there; I cannot be absent because I ‘took a walk ’.”

“I’m sure Jaken can distract them for five minutes,” Rin tried to encourage,  “ please? I-I ’d really like to spend some time together.”

Again, the demon just looked at her, his eyes impassive and even cold.

“As I have said, my work keeps me incredibly busy these days ,” Sesshomaru repeated, “ so I’m afraid it’s just not possible at this moment. ”

“R… Right…”

Rin swallowed thickly,  saddened by the words and wishing she hadn’t requested such a foolish thing in the first place.

“ Enjoy your walk .”

“P-Perhaps-”

Sesshomaru stilled at the interruption, his eyes turning to look at his wife.

“Perhaps… when it all dies down,” the younger woman murmured, “then… maybe?”

The demon didn’t yell at her or snap at her, but his face was still impassive .

“Perhaps ,” Sesshomaru told her, “but for now, no.”

“Alright.”

She was getting better and better at  fighting the urge to bow or curtsey to him, but his presence was  still so commanding it was difficult at times.  Making sure to inform the maid about where she’d be going, Rin made her wa y outside, staring at the large forest at her doorstep . Where would she even begin? She didn’t have the best sense of direction, and she wasn’t dressed for a hike.

Rin sat quietly on the ston e bench, her lungs deflating as she  felt defeated.

She kept trying to make this work.

She had too.

If she had any hope of being happy in her marriage, she had to keep trying.

She groaned loudly as her head leaned back against the bench’s back rest.

It wasn’t supposed to be this hard.

Or maybe it was, and she was just too caught up in all the fairy  tail and wonder to realize it.

Rin looked back to the manor; it stood so tall and imposing, almost like a cold castle. She turned to her husband’s office window, noticing nothing but inky darkness. At this, she hitched up her brown skirts to her knees and all but ran into the forest.

She remembered her mother’s words screaming in her ears about acting like a child . If Kaede caught her , she’d probably yell at her too. But Rin didn’t care. She would listen to them berate her all day if it just meant she could run for a minute.

She just needed to feel normal again.

Her run slowed to a walk, only pausing to look behind her and see that no one was following her. A part of her liked the secrecy of it all, and she loved that no one was chasing her and forcing her back into the  role that she wasn’t fitting. Rin’s walk stopped at the sight of  a small creek that seemed to curve from out of nowhere and then disappear back through the trees.

There were rivers that ran through the land, it was only natural that babbling brooks and streams would inhabit too.

Without a second thought Rin hitched up her skirts and picked her way through the shallowest and driest places in the creek, running through the  longer parts. She took care not to soak her boots, and she did what she could to keep her boots on her feet. It was hard though;  every memory of her running through the woods and feeling the dirt beneath her feet was starting to flood back. Her toes scrunched in their confines ,  and Ri n drew in a deep breath.

Rin walked for what felt like hours, her boots gratefully comfortable for the trek. Though,  they weren’t comfortable enough for her to press on and on. She needed to take a break and soon, no matter how much she wanted to press on.  She stopped at a t runk of the large tree .  Rin walked around it and sat down in the dirt, the house to her back and the wide expanse of forest in front of her. There was so much more to explore and do ; would time allow it?

The sun was starting to lower in the sky, though it was still incredibly warm out. Face tilted towards the sun; she felt her smile come back to her. It was warm and inviting, and the forest smelt like damp leaves and wood chippings. It smelt like home.

It really was a perfect day.

Leaning down, Rin undid the laces of her boots, pulling each foot out onto for her to then remove her stockings and dig her feet into the dirt. It was cool and gritty between her toes. Each point and flex dug up new earth and let it go again, Rin resting her head on her knees and wrapping her arms around her thighs.

She wanted to go back to the river and feel the cool water around her ankles. Her brothers always warned her that she might slip and fall on the rocks, given how clumsy she was. It was only a miracle that Rin didn’t trip on anything on her run to the tree. But right now, she was willing to risk anything just to find a moment of rest. The balls over her feet pushed the dirt around and around, the toes gripping and pulling up  stones. It was lucky her husband had this piece of land. If it had been the perfectly manicured lawn that she’d seen  in other houses she doubted she could’ve had her reprieve. 

She really would have to do this again. 

“Rin?”

Sesshomaru’s presence was no longer surprising. He always seemed to know exactly where she was . It was probably due to his nose  and ears  more than anything else .  She was, however, surprised by the large black horse Sesshomaru was leading through the woods. The animal had on a full bit and bridal, but only a green saddle pad on its back. Its hair wasn’t completely midnight, as it had flecks of white sprinkled through the body. There was long hair around  it’s feet , making Rin think it was a  draft horse of some sort .

“Sesshomaru,” she stood quickly, dusting off her skirt and hoping she didn’t have any dirt on her butt, “what are you doing here?”

“I came looking for you,” he said, “the maid said you’d left.” 

“I did tell you I was going for a walk,” Rin defended,  “do you need me for something?”

“It’s almost supper time.”

“Oh!”

How l ong had she been out here? She knew the sun was starting to  fade, but she didn’t think she’d been out this long.

“I should start getting back, huh?” Rin smiled , quickly picking up her skirts and moving around him to get out of the situation.

“Rin.”

She paused, looking up at him in curiosity.

“Your boots.”

Now she was back to feeling embarrassed all over again. The moment of joy she had stolen was now gone, replaced by the reality of her world.

“Oh… right—”

“You’ll cut your feet if you walk barefoot,” the demon stepped around her to pick up her forgotten  footwear .

“Of course,” she bit her lip, “um—”

“Get on.”

That startled her.

“What?”

“You’ll cut yourself if you walk barefoot,” he motioned to the animal, “get on.”

“I-um—”

Without waiting for her to protest, Sesshomaru grabbed her by her waist and lifted her up onto the horse’s back. She instinctively gripped his arms as her feet kicked in the air. Rin had to steady herself on the animal, hearing it grunt as she reached for  a spot on  its mane. 

“Don’t worry, he’s quite comfortable in the forest,” Sesshomaru said, coming to grab the reins, “walk on.”

The horse moved at once, starting jerkily and forcing Rin to  cling tighter . It stabilized itself rather quickly, the animal calm and slow.  Rin started to sit up on the animal, growing more comfortable as the  horse picked its way through the forest with  his master by h is side.

“What’s his name?” Rin asked, the white  hair knotted between her fingers.

“ Tenseiga ” Sesshomaru turned to look back at her, “his back’s rather broad, so an inexperienced rider should be safe on him,” his hand ran over the long neck, “he is, however, rather old too, so taking him out for rides is becoming rarer and rarer.”

“He’s beautiful,” her hand rubbed the horse’s exposed withers, “ ey ? Aren’t you a handsome old man…” she paused, “what sort of horse is he?”

“He’s a Lipizzaner.”

“Aren’t they usually white?”

“Usually,” he agreed, “but this one and his brother are special.”

“His brother?”

“ This horse was  once  my father’s,” the demon said, “the smaller of the twin foals he’d raised. My brother got  Tessaiga ,” Rin couldn’t help but notice there was some bitterness in his voice.

“He seems  like  he was a strong horse,” Rin said.

“He wasn’t.”

Rin’s patting  slowed, her eyes fixed on the twitching ears .

“Te s s a iga was the racehorse, Tens e iga was always too weak to run and he was never very good with dressage or hunting .”

“Then… why keep him?” Rin asked.

“My father has a fondness for sentimental things,” Sesshomaru said.

“No , ” she  corrected herself , “why did  _ you _ keep him?”

To this Sesshomaru looked back at her, Rin studying his expression before he turned away from her. He didn’t answer her question and decided to leave  it hanging in the air between them.

“Why do you have a forest?” Rin asked anew , “why not cut it down and make a large garden?”

“Because I prefer the forest,” Sesshomaru said .

“Oh…”

It was the exact opposite answer she expected. Every time Rin thought she had him figured out  something new came up and he reminded her how little she knew about him. For example, his handling of his horse and knowledge of the forest was not something she expected from him.  She thought he’d want every blade of grass cut to a perfect height, not having an unruly forest surrounding his home.

It must’ve looked odd, him in a crisp and clean full suit walking beside a horse that carried a barefoot and slightly muddied woman. And yet somehow, it fit the two of them. 

Sesshomaru was surprisingly patient as the horse took his time picking his way through the woods. There were times when  Tenseiga surged ahead with confidence, and others when it lowered his head to sniff at the ground in order to make his next step.

There was a stable boy  waiting for the two of them when they got back to the house . Tenseiga didn’t attempt to run faster when his home came into view , instead, he kept close to Sesshomaru,  nudging him every now and then. Sesshomaru was surprisingly patient with the animal. Rin could see there was some displeasure on the demon’s face, but  he wasn’t openly cruel or abusive or violent with his animal.

“Come here,” Sesshomaru turned his attention to her once they’d arrived.

“Thank you,” Rin smiled as he helped her down off the horse, replacing his hands on her wait and pulling her down off the beast.

She was impressed with his strength , though she knew she didn’t weigh much. The young woman’s feet touched the ground gently , and she looked up at him for a moment longer. Rin remembered the ir wedding, how he didn’t hold her like this even then.

“Thank you,” she murmured, taking a step back and he let her go , “and thank you, Tenseiga!”

Rin reached to let the horse sniff her hand before  she rubbed his nose. She forgot about her bare feet around thick hooves as the animal leaned into the touch.

“Your towels, sir.”

The maid interrupted the two of them. Rin was confused , and looked up from the horse.

“Towels?”

“You can’t walk through the house with muddy feet,” Sesshomaru said, handing her one of the towels, “they’re getting you a bowl of water.” 

“Thank you,” Rin nodded to him, watching him pass the  reins to  the stable boy. She lingered by the animal for a moment longer and then conceded to cleaning up her feet on the stone steps .

“Lord Sesshomaru!”

Rin squeezed her eyes at the sound of Jaken’s voice. She appreciated his devotion, but if he could do it at half volume, she’d appreciate it all the more.

“Forgive the interruption my Lord, but there are two more papers for you to sign—”

“And I told you, those papers will wait until tomorrow,” Sesshomaru’s voice was curt, “you are dismissed for the night.”

He turned to Rin, finding the towels had been left  be the steps and she had gone. Rin was back beside  Tenseiga , her hands rubbing his nose tenderly and her lips making kissing faces at him that he seemed to enjoy.

“Rin.”

“ Hm ? Oh! Right!”

Pulled back to the present, Rin reluctantly let the stable boy pull the horse away. She  came back to the steps, washing off the dirt on the bottom of her feet. Sesshomaru  made his way into the  house, letting Kaede  tend to her mistress.

Rin ate well that night, finally clearing her plate for the first time in forever. She tried to spend more time with him, but the demon was called away by a rather anxious Jaken. Despite  insisting that the work would keep for a night, the imp seemed nervous about a call.  A moment turned  into an hour and it was growing dark by the time he’d finally left. Apparently, Rin  knew her way around the house well enough  to disappear .

Sesshomaru checked the living room, the library, and their bedroom, growing more and more confused by the absence of his wife. Upon asking a servant, he was told that she had visited the kitchens, and the kitchens informed him that  she had gone outside to the stables. 

It was strangely quiet when he marched through the  grass towards his stable. Clouds started brewing overhead but a few allowed the scattered stars to peek through.  The light in the stables told him she didn’t want anyone to know she was there, and he suspected she must’ve stolen a key given how most of his grooms had turned in for the night. He looked in through the partially open door, noticing how she was now dressed in a dark cloak , protecting herself from the slight chill  in the late spring air.

“Want another one?” 

He s tepped into the side of the stables, keeping himself out of sight as he heard  the familiar crunch of a carrot.

“Good boy,” Rin whispered, keeping her palm open for the animal to sniff , “that’s all I have for you!”

Sesshomaru looked in, seeing Rin  was  stand in front of  Tensaiga’s stall. One of her hand was by the animal’s ears and the other was against his flaring nostrils . She was slightly bent over, and she was smiling.

“There, see?” Rin  rubbed the velvety nose, “all gone!” she giggled as she rubbed his forehead, “such a good, handsome boy, aren’t you?”

Sesshomaru leaned back against the wall. She was smiling.  She was smiling and laughing and happy. It wasn’t directed at him, but it didn’t need to be. She wa s finally smiling and laughing . There was no front, no acting or pretending, just her being happy.

“I needed to say thank you for rescuing me, didn’t I?” Rin said, “yeah; you did such a good job.”

He listened to her laugh a little more. It hadn’t changed from when she was a young girl, and a part of him was grateful for that.

“You’re getting old, aren’t you?” Rin spoke calmly, “I’ll bet you’re having a hard time  seeing,” she played with his long mane, “ but you just keep walking forward huh? Yeah…” the young woman paused, running her hand down the sleek neck, “ you must really love and trust your master… huh? ” she paused her petting, “if you love him so much…  there must be something there, right?”

This was Sesshomaru’s cue to leave. It was one thing to listen to her laugh with the horses; it was another to eavesdrop on her secret conversations.

The rustle on the grass went unnoticed by the occupants of the stable. Rin was still standing by the snuffling animal, letting her thoughts  drift calmly for the first time in weeks. It was wonderful to be back  in the stable; to be surrounded by the smells and sounds of horses again made her feel whole again. She almost didn’t want to leave.

“Guess it’s getting late,” she mused, looking  down at the horse that wanted to go to bed for the night, “alright… I’ll stop bugging you.”

Rin started walking away, stopping at the animal next to  Tens e iga’s stall that was poking its head out to investigate.

“Hello… and who are you?” she read the bronze plaque proudly polished, “ Hoshi… huh?” Rin stood up, letting the horse smell her hand before it lifted up to the pure white star on the center of it’s forehead, “I can see why . You’re always the horse that leads our carriage, aren’t you,” she rubbed the  star, “ I guess I should be thanking you too then. ”

As proud a demon as her husband was, the horses she could visit were friendly enough. In all fairness, she’d walked in with  snacks for them, so she supposed that had a lot to do with it.

“I’ll bring you treats next time,” Rin whispered, giving Tenseiga  one last rub behind the ears, “enough for everyone it seems…”

Rin stopped to look into some of the more  locked down stalls. Horses in them were bundled up for the night, and some had even gone to sleep already. Others were looking at her curiously , ears perked up and head erect. Not one animal was standing in filth, looked unfit or underfed, and every blanket and piece of tackle looked cleaned, polished, and  didn’t have a stitch out of place. The stable itself was one of the cleanest she’d been in and it was painfully obvious that there was great care put into the building and the animals. Maybe spending more time out here could be a way to  alleviate her boredom. 

She  grabbed her lantern and made her way  out of the stable. Making sure to lock the door behind her, Rin paused for a moment longer and then set off towards the house, somewhat surprised by the  lights still on. Hoping that she could go unnoticed, Rin slipped back in the house, and hung the key she’d borrowed back on its hook. Her fingers ran over the horse’s head that was  on the  bow of the key, looking at it for a minute longer before she quietly ran upstairs.

“Rin.”

She wondered if she’d get used to how silently he walked around. Sesshomaru was coming up the stairs behind her , his eyes never leaving hers.

“Yes?” she asked, her hand over her thumping heart.

“I meant to give you these earlier,” Sesshomaru handed her an iron ring, on which were a set of keys.

“Oh…”

“I don’t think I need to  tell you not to share those with anyone,” he said, while Rin fiddled with  a very similar-looking horse head , “they’re your set.”

“Thank you,”  she said earnestly, holding them close to her chest, “umm…”

“The horse head is for the stables, the largest is for the main house ,  and  the  black key is for the servant’s quarters out back . If there ar e any rooms in this house you need to get into,  let me know and I’ll give  them to you.”

“Thank you,”  she nodded again, wondering just how Sesshomaru got so comfortable  with silence.  “ Your horses are beautiful,” Rin said, “ how many do you have?”

“Twelve,” Sesshomaru told her, “ you need to be careful; they are meant for show and  trained as such. They are not ponies at a petting zoo.”

“Tenseiga is a sweetheart,” Rin  defended, “he seems  bored though.”

“He is an old horse,” Sesshomaru  stopped walking , mulling his thoughts for a moment before: “you’re welcome to ride him.”

It was the first time he’d said something that made her light up.

“Really!?”

“He doesn’t get out much, and he still needs his exercise ,” Sesshomaru said,  turning to head back to their bedroom,  “I’ll have someone show you where his tack is. If you choose to, don’t take him too far—”

He stumbled as arms wrapped around his waist . Confused, he looked back to see Rin hugging him tightly.

“ Sorry, ” Rin stepped back after realizing her action.

As  embarrassed as she looked, there was no hiding how happy his offer made her.

“Thank you,” she bowed her head to him, “ just… thank you.”

She walked past him, the keys held tightly to her chest and her smile immovable.  The tension around his stomach loosened slightl y; he hadn’t made her life perfect, but he’d  helped her find something to occupy her time and mind . These little moments  could sustain her or this marriage forever, but it was all he knew how to do . Could he learn how to do more in time?

“Sesshomaru?”

His attention was brought back to the young woman standing outside their bedroom door. Her hands were now behind her back and she was looking at him with a small smile.

“Are you coming?”

The demon stood tall, noticing that the smile was both for him, and because of him. Maybe he could learn in time after all.

"Yes."


	6. Garden Party

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last Chapter I said I was going to try and make the chapters shorter. This chapter is one of my longer ones -_-. Figures.
> 
> Sequel starts this week! Anybody not ready or is it just me?

A bright sunny day greeted the couple as they arrived at the party . Several people had already arrived, and they were among st th e several attendees. They’d since entered their sixth month of marriage, and Rin was beginning to feel more and more comfortable in the house and around people. She was starting to get more and more chatty , and despite her worries, Sesshomaru never told her to be quiet. Jaken, on the other hand, did complain, but never in front of her husband. She was starting to learn the ways of her  world, and she was feeling like maybe she could  be successful.  Even on off days like today she felt she could hold it in well enough to make it through the parties. 

Rin’s  skirts moved around her as she descended to the ground, stopping for a moment to  pat Hoshi’s nose. The demon stood off to the side, waiting for her to finish , and then linked arms and led her to the garden party.  Rin and Sesshomaru  walked with the other guests along the paths perfectly laid out and winding around a huge property that hosted gardens that would make Kings and Queens jealous.  She took the time to adjust her lace gloves and check on her fan, which was still hidden in her pocket.

“Lord Sesshomaru!”

Rin smiled , taking the skirt of her emerald-green dress and walking beside her husband. The garden was stunning and huge. The gravel crunched underfoot as they made their way towards their host with outstretched arms.

“So good of you to come,” the man smiled, “ we were honoured  that you accept ed our invitation. We thought you weren’t planning on coming! ”

“Thank you for the invitation,” Sesshomaru nodde d, “and for letting us accept so late.”

“Not at all! Not at all! Summer will be drawing to a close soon!” their host said exuberantly, “we must take every opportunity to  enjoy these beautiful flowers while we still can.”

“Of course,” Sesshomaru murmured, turning to Rin to introduce her, “this is Lady Rin Takahashi, my wife.”

“An honour and a pleasure,” he kissed her hand , “we hope you enjoy these gardens; they are my pride and joy ,” their host clearly ignoring the eye-roll his wife gave.

“They are already beautiful,” Rin said, “thank you for having us,” she bowed to him and to his wife.

“Now-Now you  _ must  _ start with the roses. My pride and joy you see and—”

“Dear,” his wife interrupted him, “don’t bore them.”

“I’m not-I’m just explaining—”

With a scoff the woman walked off, leaving her husband standing awkwardly with the couple.

“Will you excuse me-dear!”

Rin watched as he chased after his wife,  giggling before she and Sesshomaru carried on.

“His roses are over here,” Sesshomaru said,  guiding her towards the bushes people were looking at.

Rin didn’t complain,  not sure of where to go in a maze as complicated as this. They walked  past whites and reds and towards what looked like freckled purple roses; an oddity to be sure.

“These are different,” Rin commented, pointing  to the odd rose, “what is it?”

“He breeds hybrid roses,” Sesshomaru said, “ don’t get him started, he won’t stop talking until the sun sets. His wife hates them,” the demon explained, “threatened to burn down his flowers one year .”

“Why does she hate them? They’re very pretty.”

“ They’re all named after his  mother .”

“Oh…” she looked to the blooms, “um… does he…”

“Have an unhealthy obsession with his mother? Yes,” Sesshomaru muttered,  “she’s here somewhere. Though I’d rather avoid her.”

“I see…”

She could feel the demon’s eyes on her as they continued to walk, but she was too tired to ask about it. Being out here was  rejuvenating, but her mind was still elsewhere.

“ How are you?” Sesshomaru  finally  asked, “ you’re quiet today .”

“I’m fine! Just thinking,” Rin said.

“ If something is bothering you, you can tell me.”

Rin was finding it odd how insistent he was being. True, he wasn’t being as cold to her as he was in their first week of marriage, but  his questions weren’t  becoming of him.

“It’s okay,” Rin said, “ I’m fine, really.”

Sesshomaru let the matter drop , but kept close to her as they moved towards  daffodils and tiger lilies and bright  cheerful flowers that danced in the light breeze. They moved towards  large hedges and trees, which effectively sectioned off parts of the garden from others . She heard running water coming from somewhere , and starting to smell it too .

“This way,” Sesshomaru said talking down the path, “there’s—"

“Ah! Lord Sesshomaru!”

Rin stopped, turning to the voice. It was their host again, waving to the demon.

“Are we—”

“You can continue, if you’d like,” Sesshomaru said , “I’ll join you when I’m done.”

“Sure,” she saw their host approach with an elderly woman on his arm, “good luck.”

Rin heard her husband audibly groan at the sight of the two of them. Smiling, Rin took the chance to have a moment or two to herself . T urning ahead, she paused at the white roses growing  over the path.  Rin smiled as she touched some of the petals . It was nice to get to feel the soft buds on her fingers. Given how short the growing season was back home , she found the numerous plants and species growing around her thrilling. 

It was a beautiful day, and it was nice to be out of the house and have her mind on something other than the date. Sesshomaru had surprised her, asking her if she wanted to attend a garden event only  a week ago. Usually he was so prompt and timely about their outings, but this one was more short notice. Not that she minded; it was better for her to be out. Rin walked down with her hands be hind her back, looking around at the tall trees that likely bloomed earlier and she nearly walked into a tall figure with long black hair and a pair of red eyes fixed on her.

“ Lord  Onishi …”

“Hello Lady Takahashi,” Naraku kissed the back of her hand, “ how  wonderful to see  you again.”

“And you,” Rin kept stiff, trying to find her husband , “how have you been?”

“Terribly bored,”  the half-demon smiled, “but exciting now that I’ve found you,” he came to  stand next to her , “come… let’s walk next to the water lilies.”

“Oh… I couldn’t possibly,” Rin took a step back.

“Your husband won’t mind, surely,” Naraku extended his  arm to her , “come now… don’t want to be rude.”

Rin tried to take a step away, remembering Sesshomaru’s words of warning but found she had nowhere else to go, and people were starting to look at them.

“Come now,” Naraku  took another step, “don’t want to cause a scene, do we?”

She swallowed thickly, knowing he was playing on her worries. Sesshomaru was still nowhere in sight and she could swear people were starting to whisper about her. Against her better judgement, she slipped her arm in his, and picked up her skirt.

“Good girl…”

Rin felt her stomach churn at the  crooning. She tried to keep a distance between them, but Naraku countered every move she made .

“Whatever brings the two of you out today?” he kept their conversation light, “ Sesshomaru usually never comes to these sorts of things. Too dull, he says.”

“I… like flowers,” Rin said, opening her mouth to continue before —

“Of course you do.”

She closed her mouth and sucked in a deep breath. His patroni zing tone made this whole experience that much worse for her.

“How are you enjoying the West? I must be all so dull compared to the North.”

“It’s lovely,” Rin defended, “it’s much busier and—"

“Yes, but you’re married to one of the most boring men around,” he gestured from where they came, “oh yes, he’s handsome and rich, but hardly stimulating. ”

“Sesshomaru is a good husband,” Rin jumped to his defense, “I’m still so new here and—"

“Lady Takahashi...”

Rin stumbled a bit, taking in her current position with Naraku in front of her and the  large pond behind her. No matter where she moved she’d be stumbling over rocks or splashing through water . He’d trapped her, and she didn’t see it coming. Now she was starting to understand why people said he was dangerous.

“May I call you Rin?” he asked gently, tilting his hea d.

“I’d rather you didn’t,” Rin surprised even herself .

“Very well,” Narak u composed himself rather quickly, “ the truth is,  I have concerns  about your husband.”

“ Concerns ? What sort of concerns? ”

“ I am concerned... that he can’t be a good husband to you,”  he said simply, “he’s always been aloof and distant and highly manipulative ... I worry he might  hurt you.”

“Lord  Onishi —”

“Please, let me explain myself,” Naraku gently cut her off, “ Lord Sesshomaru has an incredible temper, and he so often loses it when he doesn’t get his way. ”

“Your concern is touching,” Rin  interrupted , “but my father wouldn’t have given me away to someone who would do that to me.”

“Your father might not be the best judge of character—”

“On the contrary; he’s a fabulous judge of character,” she looked him up and down, “ he passed that judgement on to me , and I can see that you are  an awful person .”

Rin saw rage flash in his eyes. She wondered for a moment if he might try and d r own her in front of everyone. His body blocked her escape, and she wondered how she was going to get out without touching him or getting wet. He’d well and truly cornered her,  and done it without laying a finger on her.

“Ah! Lord Sesshomaru!”

A wave of relief crashed over her as Sesshomaru came around the bend, her peeking around Naraku to see the demon approach.

“You’ll be taking your wife back then, will you?” Naraku gestured to Rin , “you won’t let me have her for another minute or so?”

“ No,” Sesshomaru said , subtly encouraging Naraku out of Rin’s way.

“Shame,” Naraku smiled down to Rin, “ she was just regaling me with  fanciful tales about her father. ”

“ And Naraku was making comments about your...  idiosyncrasies,” Rin came to stand next to her husband , grateful to be away from  Naraku .

“Was he now?” Sesshomaru’s eyes narr owed.

“ I was informing your wife that  you are not the warmest person,”  Naraku said, “no doubt she’s come to that conclusion already .”

“I don’t need to listen to you anymore,” Sesshomaru hissed, turning and putting his hand on Rin’s back.

“Why, Lord Sesshomaru,” Naraku purred, “it’s almost as if you don’t trust your wife…”

“It’s not Rin I do n’t trust,” Sesshomaru said , deliberately standing between them, “if you’re finished—”

“I am not.”

Naraku moved deftly, stepping up to block their path .

“I was hoping for a moment alone with you,” Naraku said , “you hardly make time for me these days.”

“That’s because I don’t want to see you.”

“Well I’d like to see you; it appears we are at an  impasse …”

“We are not,” Sesshomaru stood firm, “now move you vile—"

“Careful now,” Naraku  gestured to Rin, “mind present company.”

“Go to Hell.”

That outburst surprised both men . Naraku and Sesshomaru had their eyes on her,  while Rin crossed her arms.

“That’s not very Lady-like,” Naraku said coolly, “ you should speak kindlier to me.”

“You’re not worth me acting like a Lady,” Rin said simply.

“Mind you r tongue—"

“You mind yours,” Sesshomaru cut Naraku off, “ Rin can say what she  likes.”

Both looked to Sesshomaru, Rin in awe and Naraku with ire. Red eyes darted around, remembering where they were. Even though having a private conversation was plausible here, a fight most certainly was not.

“It appears I’ve offended the both of you,” he nodded to them, “if you’ll excuse me; My Lord, My Lady . Another time. ”

The two watched him walk off, Rin stepping a little closer to Sesshomaru’s side and he taking  her hand in his.

“ Bastard …”

“ I’m starting to see why you  don’t like him,” Rin said , rubbing her arms, “and why you think he’s dangerous.”

Sesshomaru turned to Rin quickly.

“Did he—”

“I’m okay,” Rin said, holding up her hands , “but… ” she trailed off, staring at his retreating back, “well…” she took a deep breath, “ I didn’t see that coming…”

Sesshomaru kept close to her, his arms  by her side to  hold her if she needed it.

“He- h e’s going to start a rumor about me… isn’t he?”

“Very likely,” the demon admitted .

“Probably that I’m some backwater hick with no manners ,” she pouted, “I’m sorry… my temper got the better of me…”

“What’s done is done,” Sesshomaru said, “ don’t apologise;  you’re not the first person he’s provoked, and you certainly won’t be the last. If past behaviour is anything to go by, he probably deserved it. ”

“So… what do I do?”

The demon didn’t answer her immediately. He took her away from the lilies, to an even more secluded spot with blue and  purple irises.

“I’m afraid I don’t have the answer for you,” Sesshomaru murmured, “you can ignore them, but it is not easy , especially when they’re  you or who you know .”

She closed her eyes. Of course he heard. With his senses,  it probably took him all of thirty seconds to find the two of them.

“Yeah,” she admitted, “he said… he said you would…”

“Hurt you?”

Rin didn’t want to  verbalize it, so she simply nodded. This was not a conversation she wanted to have on a day like this in a place like this.

“ You are not some ignorant child,” Sesshomaru said, “you want, and seek, the truth,” he gently pulled a small cluster of purple flowers from a bush, “ the truth is this; I will not harm you or let harm come to you.”

Rin looked from him to the flowers he handed her,  twisting the small group around in her fingers. She heard the sincerity in his voice .

“I know my reputation,” he carried on, “ I know what rumors are out there, I know what you and your father must think of me, especially after  almost seven weeks of this ,” he licked his lips, “ but I promised you and your father that I’d keep you safe and I will .”

She thought back to their last few weeks. True, he was still aloof and prideful , but  he was starting to come out of his office more and more and would answer any and all of her questions . He never once ordered her to dress a certain way or berated her for using the wrong fork at dinner. He let her make those little mistakes and didn’t make any excuses for her or let her flounder on her own. She was allowed to go off on her own at parties and events  and he wouldn’t pull her to the side and command her to do or say something. 

Perhaps, in his own way, he really was trying. But then again, her father always said it wasn’t enough to try. So when  _ was  _ trying enough?

“These are pretty…”

He looked down to the blossom in her hand , guessing that she wanted an end to this conversation.

“They’re your mother’s favorite, aren’t they?”

The flowers stopped spinning between her fingers. Slowly, she looked up to her husband, a soft and somber expression on his face.

“It’s her birthday today, isn’t it?”

She could feel pain bubbling in her chest and tears threatening to  fall. Sniffling, Rin made to wipe them away with her glove, finding a handkerchief handed to her.

“I… yes, it is,” Rin swallowed her pain,  about to say something more and then remembered what their host had said about Sesshomaru joining them last minute.  “Um… how long have you known?”

“ Your father reminded me  two weeks  ago,” Sesshomaru said, “I thought you might like something to keep your mind off of it and celebrate it at the same time , and I remembered that she liked flowers too.”

Rin sniffed, and looked down at the  small flowers that her mother loved seeing whenever they ventured South for a vacation. She could never seem to grow them  in her own garden and it frustrated her to no end.

“Thank you,” she looked up at him , still with tears in her eyes .

She looked around, making sure they were well enough alone. The last thing she wanted to do was cause a scene.

“ Take all the time you need.”

He was beside her now, his hand on her back . She wasn’t sobbing and breaking down, but a few tears were on her cheeks as she remembered her mother making huge bouquets of flowers to fill the house, much to her father’s displeasure.

“She liked you, you know.”

“Did she?” Sesshomaru asked, “ I’m afraid barely knew her.”

“She thought you were so well-mannered and respectful ,” her face cam e to a teasing smile, “she always wanted us to be more proper, like you ,” now she laughed, “she always said you’d grow up to be a handsome young man—”

Rin flinched at the confession that came out of her mouth.  Sesshomaru gave no indication that it bothered him, but he did turn his head to the side.

“She… She approved of you,” Rin needed to say something else to fill the gap, “ I think she’d have been happy  to know that you and I got married.”

“Oh?”

“ Well… happy to know I got married at all,” she rolled her eyes, “m y  mother’s house… her father gambled away all their money , so they really had nothing . When she married my father, the young upstart, she was determined to make me and my bothers proper people of society, like she was raised to be, ”  she smiled at the memory, “ no matter how hard she tried though, my father always had a say .”

“You must miss her.”

“Yeah,” Rin whispered, getting lost in one of the last memories of her mother, just before what was supposed to be her coming out ball.

_ “Think about i _ _ t,  _ _ Rin,” her mother said, yanking a brush through her hair, “first the introduction ball, then marriage!” _

_ “ _ _ No  _ _ one’s  _ _ gonna _ _ marry me mom,” Rin muttered, wincing at the  _ _ force of the teeth through her knots. _

_ “Not with that language,” the woman agreed, “sit up.” _

_ “I’m boring,” Rin defended, sitting up all the same, “and weird and—” _

_ “Weird? Who says?” _

_ “Well Ken—” _

_ “Don’t you know better than to listen to your brothers about these sorts of things?” her mother  _ _ chastised _ _ ,  _ _ “that boy… I swear…” _

_ “He’s not wrong…” _

_ “Yes he is.” _

_ Rin sighed, sitting up and let her mother continue to battle with the mess Rin called hair. _

_ “Who is coming?” Rin asked, watching her mother tuck a strand away, “who am I going to embarrass myself around?” _

_ “Well… several young Lords _ _ and their families _ _ are coming,” she gave a side-eye to her daughter, “even…  _ _ Lord Takahashi… and his eldest son…” _

_ Rin had turned around at this. _

_ “Lord Sesshomaru is coming?” _

_ “He accepted the invitation,” she pulled a few more strands into _ _ the knot she was making, “oh…this won’t do…” _

_ “Why is he coming?” _ _ Rin asked, hating how her heart raced at the very idea of seeing the young Lord again _ _ , “doesn’t he have better things to do? Isn’t he to take over the company soon?” _

_ “ _ _ He’s p _ _ robably  _ _ coming  _ _ to sweep you off your feet and take you away from here!” she made a grand gesture,  _ _ “ _ _ j _ _ ust imagine it… Mrs. Rin Takahashi…” _

_ “That’s why  _ _ it’s _ _ called  _ _ imagination _ _ mom…  _ _ it’s _ _ not _ _ always _ _ meant to be real-OW!” _

_ “Hush you,” she said, “ _ _ dreams are an important thing to have _ _ ;  _ _ they can guide us and challenge us—” _

_ “And delude us and make us miserable,” Rin chimed in _ _. _

_ “You’re starting to sound like your father,” her mother said, “ _ _ dream often my dear,” she kissed her daughter on the cheek, “and you never know what it might bring.” _

_ “Like a handsome Lord who’s in love with me?” Rin teased, wincing at the yanking of the brush. _

_ “ _ _ That’s not such a bad thing to wish for, is it?” _

“She  was always so determined and firm,” Rin finally said after a few moments of silence , her throat feeling thick, “no time for regrets, she would say, so make the choice, and live with the consequences.”

“ A wise woman,” Sesshomaru said, “ and  easier said than done.”

“She’d agree,” Rin nodded , clearing her throat and looking at the gardens , “ s he would have loved it down here . ”

Sesshomaru looked out to the flowers,  his own shoulders relaxing and his lungs taking in a deep breath.

“Thank you…” Rin smiled, looking down to the flowers in her hand, “I doubt I can just walk out with this though .”

“Just put it in your pocket,” Sesshomaru told her, “our host  won’t mind .”

“You sure?”

“ Yes.”

They walked more, Rin feeling her face cooling and her breathing calming. She wondered if she’d ever stop crying over her mother’s death. Probably not, but it was becoming easier and easier to talk about her. For once, the silence between them wasn’t anxiety inducing for her, and she was happy to just walk with the flowers twirling in her fingers.

“Can we grow some of these? At the house?” Rin finally asked, pointing to the gardens around them.

“ Sure,” Sesshomaru agreed, “you can choose which ones you’d like , and we can speak to a landscaper about it. It would have to start next year.”

“Do I have to stick to a colour scheme?” she asked , “or flower types.”

“I trust you to make those  decisions ,” Sesshomaru said, “I have no allergies, so you’re free to make your choices.”

Smiling, Rin looked down to  the flowers in her hand, wondering how well those clusters grew and how long they took.  The flowers were in her lap when they rode home, Rin fiddling with them occasionally and running the tips of her fingers over the petals.

They arrived home in time for dinner , then the two separated for an hour or two, Sesshomaru to check in on his stables, and Rin to the drawing room .  He came looking for her at the end of the night, finding her gently pressing a flower from the  bunch between two sheets of paper while the rest of the plant sat in a small vase filled with a bit of water. She looked at her handiwork and then slipped it into the  envelope that was addressed to her father. The demon breathed a sigh of relief at her work, finding her straightforwardness endearing. 

Deliberately making enough noise to be noticed,  he entered the  drawing room. Rin turned from the writing desk, closing it with the letter still to her chest. She’s moved the flower to a different table, and was clearly wondering where to put it permanently.

“When can I mail this out?” she asked, handing him the note.

“I’ll make sure it gets  sent out in the morning,” the demon assured her, “ everything finished?”

“I think so,” Rin sighed, “ never know what to put in, you know…”

“The truth it a good place to start.”

“That’s usually what I tell him .”

The demon  sat down on the couch,  holding her mail carefully while Rin  cleaned up after herself.

“I am sorry you had to deal with Naraku alone,” Sesshomaru finally said, “I should have been more careful.”

“It’s not your fault.”

She’d picked up her little vase and put it on the table in front of them.

“He came up to me,” Rin said, turning back to  lock the desk,  “and I went off on my own; you can’t control every piece of your world, you know.”

“Still, this day was for you ; you shouldn’t have had to deal with him.”

She smiled at him . 

“I  appreciate your concern,” she said, sitting next to him, “but I’m okay, really , ” she sat back, “and I did have some good memories of my mother today …”

Taking the opportunity, Rin decided to scoot closer, coming to rest on his shoulder . Sesshomaru flinched for a moment, but then slowly relaxed. It was apparent he was used to a distanced relationship, where physical contact was kept to a minimum .

“If this makes you uncomfortable—”

“It’s fine.”

His fingers found their way onto her hips, Rin relaxing further into him at the touch.

“My brother and his wife have been asking to meet you,” Sesshomaru told her, “they’d like to  have us over, with some of their friends. ”

“Oh! Sure!” Rin seemed to perk up, “ are they your friends too?”

“Mutual  acquaintances ,” Sesshomaru said , “but I do trust them, which is more than most.”

“Naraku won’t be there, will he?”

“Never,” the demon’s nose wrinkled, “my brother hates him almost more than I do.”

“Then that sounds wonderful!” Rin  said while Sesshomaru looked her over , “what?”

“Nothing,” he said, “you just seem happier; like your old self.”

“Guess I’m getting used to it here,” she stretched, “and you.”

“ Hm …”

“I mean… it’s been six weeks. I should be getting used to everything ,” Rin paused, “but not like, everything, you know? But enough, reasonable , you could say ? But who’s to say what’s reasonable or not —” she hummed, “ah well… guess the point is, I’m getting used to how you live down here.”

“And me,” Sesshomaru finished.

“And you…”  she looked up at him fro m her spot on his shoulder, “ well…”

“Well what?”

She studied him, looking up with her big brown eyes that made  him want to hold her and never let her go, to anyone.

“Nothing,” she settled on, sitting up, “for later, I think.”

Sesshomaru let her go, his wife now standin g in front of him and looking down at him.  With a small smile, she put j er hands on his legs, bent down , and gently kissed him on the lips .

He was surprised, but didn’t pull away .  She was more confident than their wedding day, an d  he pressed back and moulded his mouth to hers. They parted too quickly for his liking, and he  was left looking up at her  coy smile in surprise. 

“What was…”

“Just wanted too,” Rin shrugged, straightening up, “ thank you, again, for today,” she tucked her hair behind her ear , “and for wanting to keep me safe.”

She left him on the couch, Sesshomaru watching her leave with his mind more of a muddled mess  than before.  He looked back to the small vase of flowers she’d left behind, the purple flowers looking perky in the glass of wate r.  She was starting to flourish on her own, becoming more and more like the little girl he’d gotten to know and watch as they’d grown up . His promise to her had been genuine, and he was more determined than ever to keep her  safe and happy . 


	7. Meeting

“Kaede.” 

The demon walked into his bedroom where Rin’s maid was hovering over the young woman with a hair brush. He and Rin were preparing to leave for his brother’s but the old woman insisted that Rin be made up a little bit to impress others. Sesshomaru had been downstairs with Jaken when he heard quiet whimpers coming from their bedroom. Going to every event, Sesshomaru would always hear her cry quietly when it came to her hair, and Kaede would twist it into tight knots and braids and curls which the style demanded. It was apparent styling her hair caused her pain. 

“It’s an informal event.” 

Rin peeked around Kaede, her nose a little red and her hair half up already. 

“She still must be properly dressed!” the old woman said, returning to the hair, “how does it get so knotted?” 

“I don’t- _OW!_ ” 

“You need to tie it up more! It will stay cleaner if you do!” Kaede informed the young woman. 

“I don’t like too-OW!” 

“All right!” the old woman yielded, “we’ll stop there.” 

She let the long locks fall back to their place and left the two of them alone in a room, Sesshomaru shutting the door behind Kaede and went to Rin who was restyling her hair in a small little ponytail that pulled the front pieces to one side of her head. 

“Sorry. I think I have a sensitive scalp,” Rin sniffed, pushing her hair back, “it was always like this…” 

“Why do you have your hair like that?” 

It was the first time he’d asked her about herself that wasn’t a formality. 

“Like what?” 

“Have those pieces tied up on the side of your head,” his finger touched the small side ponytail on her head. 

“My mother liked doing this for me,” Rin said, “it was a compromise when I was a child; I liked it long, she wanted it up,” she gestured to her hair, “this was what came out of it. We agreed on the side so I could stick flowers in it,” she blushed lightly, “kind of silly, isn’t it?” 

Sesshomaru hummed quietly, looking back to the imp that had joined them at the door. 

“The horses are ready, My Lord,” he bowed before scuttling off. 

“If you’re ready…” 

“Yes,” Rin stood, rubbing her sore scalp, “let’s go.” 

She took his offered arm and followed him into their carriage. They were only to spend a night or two at InuYasha’s, so neither of them packed much. They set off in a comfortable silence, Rin really unsure of what to even ask when it came to her brother and sister-in-law. She knew pieces, like that Sesshomaru didn’t seem all that fond of his brother, and that Kagome was once a Higurashi, and those that didn’t go into religion were fletchers and archers by trade. 

They arrived in the late afternoon. Their trip was longer than she expected, but Rin figured she could easily ride out alone if she ever wanted too. InuYasha’s house was smaller than Sesshomaru, and didn’t have as much of a forest on his backdoor. He had settled in rolling hills, with older farm building surrounding him. It was apparent they were abandoned, and the land seemed to be in dispute. Expertly cared for flowers lined the driveway and stone flew under the horse’s hooves as they came up to the house. As usual, Sesshomaru met her by the door, walking arm-in-arm with her towards the large oak doors. 

Sesshomaru and Rin were greeted not by a servant, but by a young man with white dog ears perched on top of his head. His hair was long and thick and he wore a suit of deep burgundy. Before Sesshomaru could even speak the door opened wider to reveal a young woman with wavy black hair and bright brown eyes. Her pink dress swished as she pulled open the door wider, and her smile was huge. 

“Hello!” 

In an instant, arms were around Rin. Somewhat stunned, she stumbled slightly and managed to awkwardly hug back, given how her arms were trapped by her side and her ribs were being pressed tightly. 

“Rin, this is my half-brother, InuYasha,” he gestured to the half-demon beside him, “and this is his wife, Kagome.” 

“It’s so wonderful to meet you!” Kagome pulled back, bouncing on the balls of her feet, “Big Brother hasn’t told us a thing about you and we weren’t at the wedding so—” 

“What have I told you about calling me that?” Sesshomaru interrupted, his half-brother bristling. 

“Hey!” 

“It’s a formality,” Kagome interrupted them, clearly trying to diffuse the brewing fight, “but that makes you Big Sister so—” 

Rin’s head was spinning with how fast this was moving. She’d only just met Kagome and InuYasha, and they were talking to her so informally it was like they’d been friends for years. Kagome was bouncing between all three of them, and her excitement was evident. Infectious, even, as Rin let herself be swept up in Kagome’s energy. 

“Rin’s younger than you two,” Sesshomaru was saying, likely correcting Kagome’s assertion that Rin was her older sister. 

“She is?” Kagome asked, “how old are you?” 

“Twenty-one,” Rin said, “Sesshomaru’s five years older than me.” 

“Oh!” Kagome’s eyes lit up, “so that makes me your older sister! I’ve always wanted a younger sister! Well, a sister in general,” she took a deep breath, “oh! I’m just so happy to meet you!” 

Rin was pulled in for another hug, something she missed since coming here. Sesshomaru was not the most affectionate man. His hand every now and then, his arms at events, but hugs? Kisses? He seemed to want to keep his distance with more intimate forms of affection. He would let her lead, but never take the leap himself. 

“Come on!” Kagome whispered, “everyone else hasn’t shown up yet; let’s you and I go for a walk! Just the two of us!” 

“Okay!” Rin agreed, “lead the way!” 

They left their husbands alone as the two women headed down the steps, Kagome leading her down a path and walking up the path a way before she started talking to Rin. Rin looked back to the two brothers, Sesshomaru watching them for a moment longer before he followed his brother inside. 

“So,” Kagome started, looking to the smaller woman, “how is it? Being out here?” 

“It’s—” 

“Oh! And don’t feel like you have to lie or anything for formality sake,” Kagome cut her off, “just be honest!” 

Rin licked her lips. Honest was tricky; not because she couldn’t be, but because she was taught to be polite. 

“It’s nice,” she finally settled, unable to shake off her Lady’s training, “the scenery is gorgeous!” 

Kagome gave her a look, but didn’t press the matter further. They talked a little more about their upbringings and mundane topics, but it was nice to feel like she had a friend again and talk about little things that didn’t really matter. 

“We should get together more often!” Kagome said after a rare moment of silence between them. 

“I’d love that,” Rin said honestly, “but don’t force yourself.” 

“For you? Wouldn’t dream of it! Now that Sesshomaru’s softened up a little bit, InuYasha might enjoy his company.” 

“Softened up?” Rin asked, “what do you mean by that?” 

Kagome paused, looking back to the house before she clarified. 

“I know Sesshomaru can be… he’s not the nicest or warmest person, is he?” Kagome said, “I would play with InuYasha when we were teenagers and he wasn’t a very nice person then. He was actually rather awful,” she paused, “but then he asked for your hand in marriage! So it sounds like he’s changing.” 

“He didn’t… it was an arranged marriage,” Rin reminded Kagome, thinking back to the day she learned Sesshomaru had asked for it, “although… he did ask for that concession, so I guess that’s technically correct? Unfortunately, I don’t have a romantic proposal story…” 

“Most women don’t get one,” Kagome reminded her, “Sesshomaru’s the first-born, so I think he had so much pressure on him to marry well that when he had an opportunity to marry you, he jumped on the chance. Didn’t he spend time with you before the wedding?” 

“When we were children yes,” Rin said, “and I think he was supposed to come down, but he said something came up and so we never did.” 

“Really!? He’s such a stickler for tradition, I thought for sure he’d try and court you before the wedding,” Kagome seemed in thought, “when did you two get married?” 

“Uh… early summer,” Rin told her, “why?” 

“Well… something _did_ come up before all of that,” Kagome hummed, “but… I’m not sure how much I can tell you…” 

“Why not?” 

“Well,” now Kagome seemed uncomfortable, “Sesshomaru’s asked us not to involve you…” 

“Involve me in what?” 

Kagome thought for a moment, and looked to Rin with concern in her eyes. 

“There… was an incident about two months before you two got married.” 

“Is it… bad?” Rin asked, “someone said he was engaged—” 

“Oh! No; he’s never been engaged before,” Kagome laughed, “he’s had a relationship or two, but nowhere near as many as the rumors say, and he was single for almost a year before you two got married,” she leaned closer to Rin, “he’s a bit of a romantic, but don’t tell him I said that.” 

“He is!?” 

“Oh yes,” Kagome said, “trouble is, he was never allowed to be, you know? None of his previous romantic engagements would’ve reciprocated it and society wouldn’t let him so he doesn’t act on it.” 

“He just… it’s like he’s always trying to keep his distance from me,” Rin whispered, “and every time I try to close the gap… he just moves away.” 

Kagome smiled to Rin, seeing the young woman’s mind move a million miles an hour. She was analyzing every move she made, and it was causing her stress. 

“Sesshomaru loves to be in control,” Kagome said, “but he doesn’t want to control you; and I think that thought makes him uncomfortable,” she nudged Rin, “I don’t think he’s been in love with anyone before you—” 

Rin stopped in her tracks, looking up at Kagome with a slacked jaw. 

“What?” 

Kagome’s hand went to her mouth. 

“Did I say that out loud?” 

“What on earth makes you think he’s in love with me?” 

“Well… he was always so excited to get to travel up North, and when we were younger he’d talk about you and he was under so much anxiety when your father was deliberating—” Kagome seemed to look for an exit, “and… he won’t stop watching you and wants you close to him at all times and he was real nervous when you first met Naraku—” 

“What does _that_ have to do with anything?” 

“Naraku… isn’t a good person,” Kagome said, “Sesshomaru’s not the warmest person, but at least he’s honorable and protective. Naraku…” she bit her lip, “just… don’t get involved with him, okay?” 

“You think he’s dangerous too?” Rin asked. 

“He hurt a very good friend of ours,” Kagome explained, “and he runs a very shady business. Sesshomaru doesn’t want you anywhere near that-that-monster. And for good reason.” 

“He doesn’t seem dangerous; a nuisance maybe—” 

“Let’s hope he stays that way,” Kagome said, “but if you should ever feel unsafe or scared, you just ride down to see us and we’ll make sure you’re taken care of.” 

“Thank you…” Rin paused, “but Sesshomaru’s never made me feel unsafe; a lot of the time, it’s the opposite.” 

“That’s good,” Kagome sighed, “that makes me happy to hear… actually.” 

A pair of amber eyes watched the young women walk around the woods. Rin seemed happy, and had he been outside, he probably would have heard her laugh. 

“She seems really nice.” 

InuYasha took a seat on the couch with his cup of tea and his sandwich. The maid left the two of them alone, and for the first time in their lives, they weren’t trying to tear out each other’s throats. 

“She is,” Sesshomaru admitted, sipping on his tea, “almost too nice for this place.” 

“You’re not gonna toughen her up or anything—” 

“Nothing so barbaric,” Sesshomaru snapped, “besides, she’s strong enough as it is; no need for me to force her into anything.” 

The half-demon thought it was odd, to see his brother act so calm. And the things he was saying were borderline comforting for someone like his brother. 

“Damn… you actually really like her.” 

Sesshomaru eyed his brother, the half-demon used to his brother’s looks and was thusly unperturbed. 

“Well, you do,” InuYasha shrugged. 

“I care about her enough to selfishly pull her from her home and force her to live here,” Sesshomaru said, “clearly—” 

“She accepted, didn’t she?” InuYasha pointed out, “she must’ve known what she was signing up for. Don’t treat her like she’s some dumb child.” 

Sesshomaru straightened up. Another conversation he did not want to have with someone who shouldn’t make as much sense as he was. 

“Fine, you screwed up,” the half-demon crossed his arms, “so; tell her that—" 

“Father and I already had this conversation.” 

“And it clearly stuck,” InuYasha huffed, “which means you already know the answer.” 

“And you’re going to tell it to me again?” Sesshomaru asked. 

“Like you’d listen to me,” his brother said, “you’re too damn stubborn to wake up and do what you need to anyway cause it makes you feel uncomfortable.” 

Sesshomaru bristled at the implications and his brother’s tone. What made it worse was that his oblivious brother had a valid point. 

“Well… your timing is terrible,” the half-demon leaned back on the couch opposite his brother, “I get not wanting to lose her, but now you’ve got another issue on your hands.” 

“If you’re referring to whatever Naraku has up his sleeve—” 

“It’s a little bigger than that,” InuYasha suddenly sat up, “is _that_ why you’re beating yourself up!?” 

Sesshomaru was reminded vehemently why he hated having lengthy conversations. 

“You couldn’t have predicted what he’d be doing—” 

“Yes I could have,” Sesshomaru said, “and I should have. And now I’ve dragged Rin into all this and she most certainly doesn’t deserve this.” 

“So… it happened,” InuYasha said, “now you’ve got to deal with it.” 

“When did you become such an expert in giving advice?” Sesshomaru grumbled. 

“You know when.” 

InuYasha was becoming surprisingly wiser in his older life, though Sesshomaru attributed that to his marriage to Kagome more than anything else. 

“Just tell her the truth; that’s all she wants to hear,” InuYasha seemed determined to have the last word, “suck it up; you’re already halfway there.” 

“What on earth makes you think that?” 

“Well… you’re already not the cold bastard I grew up with.” 

“Oh?” 

“You haven’t called me a vile half-breed once since I walked in.” 

“I’m waiting for the right moment.” 

InuYasha opened his mouth to respond, but at that moment: 

“We’re back!” 

Rin and Kagome walked into from the back door, each of them kicking dirt off their shoes before joining the young men in the living room. 

“And just in time too,” Kagome said, “Rin and I spotted Miroku’s carriage coming up the lane.” 

Sesshomaru said nothing as Rin came to sit beside him and InuYasha stood to greet his friend at the door. 

“How was your talk?” Rin asked her husband. 

“Fine,” Sesshomaru murmured, “and yours?” 

“Good,” Rin smiled, “Kagome’s really nice! I really like her!” 

Their conversation was interrupted by Kagome beckoning the two of them to the door. Standing, Rin went to meet the other guests, and she ran into a familiar face. 

“Sango?” 

Wide eyes turned to look at Rin. Her dress was also pink, but it was darker, almost a salmon colour. Her straight hair was up in a high ponytail and she was standing next to someone Rin assumed was Miroku. He was dressed in a navy blue and purple suit and his hair had a small pony-tail at the base of his neck. There were gold chains in his pockets and he seemed to carefully cultivate his fashion to the time. 

“Sorry… have we met?” 

“A long time ago,” Rin said, “it’s alright if you don’t remember—” 

“I’m afraid I don’t,” Sango seemed apologetic, “my apologies.” 

“That’s alright,” Rin bowed, “I’m Rin,” she couldn’t bring herself to say ‘Sesshomaru’s wife’. 

“Wonderful to meet you, properly,” Sango smiled, curtseying, “hopefully I can remember where we knew each other from.” 

“Don’t stress about it,” Rin told her, returning the curtsey, “it’s no problem if you can’t.” 

She smiled at Rin once more before she caught the eye of the demon that stepped behind Rin. 

“Lord Sesshomaru.” 

Rin was surprised at how stiff the young woman had suddenly become. Sesshomaru nodded to them both, but didn’t say much. 

“A delight to meet you!” Miroku finally stepped forward, clasping Rin’s hands in his, “you are just as beautiful as everyone says!” 

“Oh!” Rin turned a light red, “th-thank you?” 

“Miroku…” 

Sango was beside her husband now, giving him a look and muttering his name through gritted teeth. 

“I’m just being friendly!” Miroku defended, “I won’t do anything, I promise!” he eyed Sesshomaru, “besides, Rin has a big bad dog to protect her!” 

Sesshomaru looked like he’d love nothing more than to punch Miroku out at the comment. Kagome ushered all of them along, bringing everyone to her living room while a late lunch was prepared. 

“Miroku… is friendly,” Rin whispered when she and Sesshomaru were alone. 

“He’s a flirt,” Sesshomaru said, “but harmless. He’s loyal to his wife and family. If you took him up on that he’d run for the hills.” 

“That’s good,” Rin sighed, not ready to become entangled in anything remotely scandalous. 

“I didn’t know you knew Sango’s family,” Sesshomaru looked to the woman. 

“Not well,” Rin whispered, “I knew her brother, Kohaku, when they came over with their father, I think they were looking for horses to train… anyway, we got to playing and he made fun of me so I pushed him and,” she went lightly red, “she threw something at me in retaliation.” 

“Threw something?” 

“We were really young,” Rin defended, “I think it was a stick? But she missed-well… I tripped running away. And she decided we were even and that was that.” 

“And you never kept in touch?” 

“Not… not really,” the young woman admitted, “she sort of scared me, to be honest.” 

“She’s very protective of her little brother,” Sesshomaru said, “seems that hasn’t changed.” 

“Where is he?” 

“Probably training their horses,” the demon murmured, “I use them sometimes; they whole family is talented in that regard.” 

“Is… that why she doesn’t like you all that much?” 

Sesshomaru studied her, clearly impressed with her powers of observation. 

“Part of the reason,” Sesshomaru said, “she thinks I push her brother too hard. As I said; very protective.” 

Rin nodded, following the rest of the group into the living room for a pleasant chat before a servant announced that a dinner of braised pork and potatoes was ready for them. They’d barely sat down for a few moments before Kagome decided to ask Rin some more questions. 

“How’s Kaede?” Kagome asked, “forgot to ask that on our walk.” 

“You know Kaede?” 

“Of course! She was one of my teachers!” 

“A teacher?” Rin glanced to Sesshomaru, “what did she teach?” 

“A lot,” Kagome laughed, “etiquette mainly, but she also taught me about the ins and outs of society. You know, those unwritten rules,” she leaned forward to whisper, “she also taught me how to shoot and arrow.” 

“Oh!” Rin giggled, “she’s never mentioned it to me.” 

“She wouldn’t, probably wants you to be a proper Lady, unlike me,” Kagome teased, “but she’s worked with others, like Ayame-you’ve met Ayame, right?” 

“Madame Puanteur has invited us to attend her Fete,” Sesshomaru said, “Koga’s been invited, and we’ll likely see Ayame there.” 

“Ug,” InuYasha groaned, “make sure you eat something before you go; her food is disgusting.” 

“It wasn’t that bad—” 

“There was an eyeball in my soup,” InuYasha countered, “and it was _meant_ to be there.” 

“I’m sorry, but who is Koga?” 

“Koga’s a wolf demon and Ayame is his fiancée; she’s from the North, like you,” Kagome explained, “do you know Ayame? From up North?” 

“Is her family related to the military in anyway?” 

“Uh… no; I don’t think so, no.” 

“Then no,” Rin said, “the North is pretty big, and subjective,” she explained, “my father mostly hung around other military men.” 

“Why’d they all settle there?” InuYasha asked, his nose crinkling 

“There’s a military base nearby,” Rin explained, “when they get dismissed, they often don’t go far.” 

“So you grew up with soldiers,” Miroku said, pointing his knife in her direction while his wife smacked his hand for his poor manners. 

“You could say that,” Rin agreed, smiling quietly as she remembered dinners around her parent’s table when her father had military men over. Miroku’s knife waving would have been the tamest thing at those events. 

They finished dinner without incident, and when it came time for the after-dinner drinks, Kagome ushered the women upstairs for some privacy. 

“Nothing for you, Sango?” Rin asked, accepting the drink Kagome poured her but noticed Sango was holding on to a glass of water. 

“No,” she shook her head. 

“Sango’s pregnant,” Kagome whispered. 

“Oh! Well congratulations!” 

“Thank you,” Sango laughed, to Kagome, “any luck on your end?” 

“Not for lack of trying,” Kagome sighed, “eventually, but not now,” she turned to Rin, “what about you?” 

Rin was confused now. 

“What about me?” 

“Are you pregnant yet?” 

Rin coughed into her cognac. 

“What?” she asked, trying to pat her corset dry, ignoring the burning in her nose. 

“She’s only _been_ here two months!” Sango pointed out. 

“Plenty of time to make a baby!” Kagome said, “so? Are you?” 

“Doubt she’d be drinking if she was,” Sango muttered. 

“Maybe… you are but don’t know!” Kagome looked to Rin, “when did you last bleed?” 

“Kagome!” 

“What!? I just want to know if she’s pregnant or not—" 

“No! I’m not,” Rin finally interrupted, “have to have sex to—” 

She froze, realizing what she’d just admitted. 

“What!?” 

Kagome immediately hushed when she remembered who was downstairs. 

“You haven’t had sex!?” she whispered, sitting next to Rin while Sango looked at her in surprise, “you’ve been married two months!?” 

“I-I—he—oh…” Rin groaned, really wishing she’d kept that secret to herself. 

“ _And_ he’s a very attractive man—” 

“He’s your brother-in-law!” Sango chastised. 

“I’m not having an affair with him!” Kagome said, “and I love InuYasha. But you have to admit; of the two of them, he _is_ the more handsome of the two.” 

“I don’t want to talk about this—" 

“But we’re the people you’re _supposed_ to talk too about this,” Kagome encouraged, “we won’t tell him! We promise!” 

“And we don’t judge you,” Sango added, “promise.” 

Rin looked from one to the other. Both of them were right; they were the sort of people you were supposed to talk to about these sorts of things. They could give her advice or a shoulder to cry on or laugh with her. But the problem was she didn’t _want_ to talk about it with them. The person she wanted to talk to about it wasn’t the most approachable man. 

“ _He_ won’t _do_ anything,” Rin finally admitted, pushing aside her need to avoid the topic, “every time we go to bed that’s all that happens; we go to bed, and we sleep,” she bit her lip, “I know he’s been with other women… so why not me?” 

Both women went silent, and let Rin mope a little. 

“Oh Rin,” Kagome rubbed her arm, “it’s not you, it’s him.” 

“Right—” 

“I agree,” Sango piped up, “and… that’s not the only thing that matters—" 

“I just… want to feel like he actually _wants_ me,” Rin whispered, “is that so wrong?” 

“No,” Kagome brought her in for a hug, “absolutely not…” 

Rin let herself be comforted like that for a few minutes, grateful for the surrounding her. Kagome and Sango never made her feel like her issue was trivial and they weren’t giving her silly suggestions to make him act differently. Instead, they offered her a place to go if she should ever need it, and an ear when she couldn’t talk to Sesshomaru. 

They moved on from the topic to trivial things, like who they did and didn’t like in society, and who Rin should avoid and events she should absolutely never attend. They talked late into the night, and only slowed when Rin started to yawn. 

“It’s getting late,” Rin said, standing up, “I’m going to go to bed, if that’s alright.” 

“Of course!” Kagome smiled, “there’s no set time for breakfast, but we can find something to do tomorrow.” 

Rin walked alone down the halls of warm caramel and gold trim. Her fingers trailed over the trim and she looked up rather than straight ahead, which was how InuYasha came to startle her. 

“Oh! InuYasha!” Rin put her hand over her chest, “you frightened me!” 

The half-demon stood in front of her, equally as surprised by her reaction. 

“Sorry,” he said, “didn’t mean to sneak up on you.” 

Rin nodded, noticing how the half-demon was looking around almost nervously. 

“I kinda wanna thank ya, actually” InuYasha looked around to make Sesshomaru was well out of earshot. 

“Me!?” Rin stared at him, “why?” 

“Well… I got to sit in a room with him and never called me a half-breed or nuthin,” he noticed her staring, “sorry for my language, it’s hard to keep up appearances but our dad always let me have a breather, and I forget that Sesshomaru doesn’t like it…” 

“I don’t mind,” Rin shrugged, “and… as much as I want to take credit for everything, your brother might just be growing up—” 

“Nah, it’s you,” InuYasha said, “and… I’m glad it’s you,” his head tilted, “you’re shorter than I thought you’d be.” 

“Your dad talked about me?” 

“Sesshomaru did,” InuYasha shook his head, “we were actually supposed to go to the wedding… but your dad wanted it real quiet…” 

“My… my dad’s a pretty private person,” Rin said, “I think if it were up to him, I wouldn’t be married. To anyone.” 

“It sounds like he must trust Sesshomaru,” the half-demon grinned, “wonder what he said…” 

“Don’t know,” she shrugged, “all I know is Sesshomaru showed up and about a month later my father brought me his proposition.” 

“And you accepted? Just like that?” 

Now it was Rin who looked around for her husband. 

“I knew him, at least,” Rin said, “and… he came to visit to ask. Either way, I was going to be married off, and my father was closer to Sesshomaru and your father than anyone else,” she took in a deep breath, “and the young man I knew growing up… I liked being around him…” 

“Did… did you know any others or…” 

“Yeah… I knew one or two,” Rin said, “a young man from a small hamlet to the South I think?” she shuffled, "he was nice… horrific manners though.” 

“Worse than mine?” InuYasha teased. 

“You don’t smack your lips when you eat,” she shuddered, “or spray food everywhere…” 

“Ew.” 

She smiled at his retort. InuYasha might be related to Sesshomaru, but he was much more laid-back. Likely a result of being the son that wasn’t set to inherit everything. 

“Right… well, have a good night,” Rin said, nodding to him before she walked on. 

“Um…” 

InuYasha took a deep breath. Clearly long conversations about feelings weren’t something that came naturally to this family. 

“You… okay?” he paused, “I mean… with my brother—” 

“I’m doing alright,” Rin trued to assure him, “thank you.” 

“If you ever need anything, Kagome and I can help you.” 

“Thank you,” she repeated, “but I would be remised if I didn’t try.” 

“You know he’s not something that needs to be saved, right?” 

“I know,” Rin nodded, “neither am I.” 

She left him with that, bowing to him before she carried on to the guest bedroom, where she opened the door to her husband already in bed with his eyes shut and the lights off. Rin undressed quickly, and then joined him. 

“Hey,” Rin said, crawling into bed next to him. 

“Hm…” Sesshomaru murmured, keeping his eyes closed. 

“Never seen you this tired,” Rin teased. 

“My brother and his friends are exhausting,” the demon sighed, “how were Kagome and Sango?” 

“They were lovely,” Rin settled under the covers, “they might come over… for tea… or lunch…” 

“Hm…” 

Rin looked down at him, her husband was keeping himself to himself, just like he always did. Would he ever not? If she kept to herself, what would become of them? She bit her lip; in all her romance novels, the man led first. But this wasn’t a novel, it was her life. Maybe if anything was to happen, she needed make it happen. 

He finally opened his eyes when she rested her head on his chest, her hand next to her face. She didn’t look up to him, but waited for him to make the next move. Her heart was in her throat as she waited for him to push her away and roll over. Or ask her about it. Rin’s thigh was pressed against his but her feet were locked over her own ankles. 

Instead, his hand came to her back and he settled back in for the night. He said nothing, and Rin came to expect that from him. But he didn’t reject her advance either, and that made her feel just a little bit better. She slept comfortably that night, knowing that, even though she had someplace else to go, a part of her knew Sesshomaru wouldn’t let her feel like that. Or at least, that was what she saw in him. 


	8. Fête

The young woman thanked her husband as she descended the steps of their carriage. Sesshomaru kept her close, linking arms and walking with her up the  path with all the other guests.

The party was unlike their usual affairs. This one was thrown by a rich  eccentric woman who preferred to be referred to by a French title. Everyone seemed to comply, and from what Rin gathered , it was easier to go along with her and her ramblings. Her manor was an odd thing, and looked like it was just thrown together from other houses in the area. The bricks themselves were not a typical color, but was painted a ghastly green and white. Not that you could see it from the road, given how long and windy her drive was. According to Sesshomaru, it was very “in” , though where it was “in” Rin had no clue. 

“Welcome!”

They were stopped at the entrance to the house by their hostess. Brown eyes looked her up and down in awe, as  Rin had never seen a woman dressed so bizarrely.

The woman’s face was painted pure white  save for her bright red lips and drawn-on eyebrows. Her wig was bright red and curly and clashed with her purple and yellow robe she was wearing. There was a large hat pushing all the curls down and it was wrapped in some sort of spotted fur, which  matched the animal pelt she had over her shoulders. Leopard, perhaps? Not that Rin could really tell the difference or cared much when it came to exotic furs. 

“Lord Sesshomaru,” her red nails firmly clasped his hand, “so good of you to come! You look so much like your mother. How is the old dog?”

“She’s well,” Sesshomaru seemed displeased to have his mother referred too as an old dog, “she sends her regards.”

“Bah! The woman hasn’t regarded anyone in forever ,” the woman turned to Rin, “and this must be your beautiful wife!  From the East?”

“From the North, My Lady,” Rin curtseyed, “thank you for—”

“Yes  yes , ” the woman had immediately moved on to the guests behind them, “my dears!”

Still somewhat in shock, Rin let Sesshomaru pull her along inside the house , the smell one of the first things to hit her. 

“Oh my,” Rin coughed, her eyes starting to water,  “is everything supposed to be so… perfumed,” she whispered, coughing into her sleeve.

“Yes,” the demon said, “it’s her profession.”

“Are  _ you  _ going to be okay?”

Sesshomaru looked down at her, suggesting that this was not the time or place to ask him questions like that. However, she noticed that he was breathing a little more through his mouth an d he  was  keeping to himself more than usual.

Rin was handed some sort of drink in a wide glass . While it smelled nice, she wasn’t sure it was because of the drink itself or  the perfume that seemed to saturate the rooms. They walked along to the room  the  other guests had a ccrued. Some of them were simply enjoying the company they were in, while others seemed just as uncomfortable as Rin was, and the room wasn’t helping.

Absolutely none of the colors match ed , and the patterns clashed with the ones next to it. The furniture was all stained unnatural  colors, like green and pink , and the walls were painted  equally as shocking. Curtains were the same yellow as the scarf the woman had around her neck and every surface was covered  with perfumed stones and odd  sculputres . Rin didn’t mind bright colors, but the excessive amounts were a bit much.

“Ah, Lord Sesshomaru…”

Rin groaned quietly. Why was he  _ everywhere _ !?

Both of them turned to look at the approaching half-demon. He was dressed in a stark black suit and white cravat. His hair was  tied in a low ponytail with a spider wrapped  around the  thick hair . Naraku was smiling, and seemingly enjoying the discomfort everyone else was experiencing.

“What a pleasure it is to see you here at one of Madame  Puanteur ’s Fete,” the half-demon smiled, “she’s been dying to get you here for ages.”

“Naraku,” Sesshomaru dropped all formalities, “what are you doing here?”

“I’m a frequent guest at these parties,” he explained, “ she’s such a delight, isn’t she?” he sharply inhaled, “and always experimenting with the most wondrous of smells, wouldn’t you agree?”

“It’s certainly different,” Rin piped up, really hating Naraku’s unwavering smile .

Uncomfortable with the air between them, she took a drink, and coughed as she sipped what was a very heavily floral drink.

“Elderflower,” Naraku smiled, “lovely, isn’t it?”

“It’s… very distinct,” Rin said, patting her collarbone.

“Will you excuse us—"

“Why… if I didn’t know any  better, I’d say you were trying to avoid me.”

“ You  finally caught on ,” Sesshomaru murmured.

The young woman was impressed by how  unfazed the half-demon was with everything thrown his way.

“Too bad you can’t avoid me forever,” Naraku whispered, “ you can barely go a week. Or would you rather shut yourself away?” he glanced down to Rin, “you have a lovely wife now though… maybe hiding yourself away wouldn’t be such a bad thing.”

Sesshomaru’s eyes narrowed, Rin feeling his muscles tense under her hand. 

Naraku took his leave, nodding to the two of them and striding over to another couple  and bringing them in for a hug.

“He’s like a cockroach,” Rin whispered, Sesshomaru  snorting at the implication.

“That’s one word for him yes…”

They managed to find a space for themselves, mingling with other businessm en and trying to  avoid  the more unsavoury party-goers. Their hostess joined them a few minutes later, and she  flitted from group to group , mingling for a few moments, saying her piece, and then leaving. After she did this for a little while, she spoke with a servant and then  made an announcement in her shrill voice.

“Come  come !” her large sleeves  flowed as she waved in the air, “we are having  hors d'oeuvres in the lounge! Everyone must come and join! Wet your pallets!”

“OH!”

Rin didn’t mean to exclaim as loud as she did. Some of the guests turned to look at her while she fought every instinct she had to run and duck behind Sesshomaru.

In the corner of the room was a wolf. It was up on  its back paws, front ones extended out to the guests, with wild eyes and an open  mouth showing long white teeth. It fit in with the rest of the room; heads of varying animals lined the walls and there were bears  in the other corners, standing up  and in mid fight.

“I would have thought a room like this wouldn’t have been so shocking, given your father’s pastime,”  Naraku’s voice cut in her thoughts.

“No… the -the wolf gave me a shock,” Rin said, trembling  and finding breathing becoming more and more difficult , “that’s all.”

“Poor dear,” to Sesshomaru, “perhaps it’s a good thing Koga isn’t here tonight.”

Sesshomaru looked like he was ready to murder the half-demon . He gently pulled  the woman aside and away from the taxidermy wolf. She had turned her head away from  it and was holding onto him tightly.

“Rin? What’s wrong? ”

“I’m sorry,” she whispered, looking back to the snarling  canine, “I h-hate wolves…”

“Rin?”

“I just-I need-ah—"

“Excuse us,” Sesshomaru said, gently pulling Rin out of the room.

The two wove down a twisting maze of hallways , Sesshomaru always double-checking to make sure they weren’t followed. He had her by the arm and Rin was doing all she could to make sure that she was breathing. Her feet managed to step with him until they came to a spot where Sesshomaru could crack open a window .

“ I’m-I’m sorry,” Rin  was gasping , “I-I just-I can’t—”

“Breathe, Rin,” the demon said, “ take your time.”

“I-I can’t,” she touched her corset, “I can’t breathe I— ”

Rin was pressed to his chest, his fingers gently tugging the strings of her corset.

“Um…”

“I won’t do anything untoward,” Sesshomaru whispered, “just breathe.”

The hand between the laces and her modesty panel  gently worked the strings looser until she felt herself taking a deep breath . It was at that moment that he stopped and pressed gently on her back to keep her chest against his . She buried her nose into his collarbone, managing to smell something other than the potpourri that was around the house.

He was warm and his form was firm , and she could feel his eyes on her . It was comforting, and he wasn’t pressing her for any details or asking her any questions. He was just letting her be. And right now, that was all she needed to keep the memories of her childhood from coming back in full force.

“I… think I’m better,” Rin said after a few minutes, gently pushing back from him,  “ t hank you,” she whispered, wiping her cheeks while he redid the knot on her back.

“Are you alright?”

“I…  yes ,” she sniffed, “ so long as I don’t see another wolf again—"

“You don’t need to explain yourself ,” the demon looked down the hall to make sure they were alone,  “ if you don’t want to go back—”

“I’m fine,” Rin sniffed , taking a deep breath, “I’m fine… just don’t let me go near it.”

They walked back slowly , Rin  wondering what he was going to  say to excuse their absence.

“Ah! There you two are!”

Naraku’s voice was quickly becoming  the most irritating thing in her life. Somehow, he’d appeared out of a room behind them , and was now looking at the two of them with fascination.

“Madame  Puanteur wondered where you two  had run off too,” Naraku stood casually with his hands in his pockets, “you weren’t doing anything that would offend our hostess ’s hospitality , were you?”

“Don’t say such foolish things,” Sesshomaru said, growing  more irritated with Naraku’s presence.

“No?” he  adjusted to stand as tall as Sesshomaru, “perhaps the perfumes have become too much for you. Those senses of yours— ”

“I ate something earlier that didn’t agree with me,” Rin gently interrupted , “ I needed a moment. Now, if you’ll excuse us.”

It was she who pulled the two of them along, Sesshomaru not complaining as he stepped in time with her until—

“Is that why your husband  needed to undo your corset?”

Rin froze, betraying herself and looking up to Sesshomaru. Naraku took the time to  close the gap between  them, stepping beside Rin.

“Those laces are tied differently than before,” his  finger flicked the bow the demon had carefully  knotted, “ well,” he looked up to Sesshomaru, “at least you didn’t break them .”

The half-demon walked away from the two of them with a grin on his face . Rin felt her heart drop into her stomach. Would he tell others? Start spreading some awful rumor about the two of them? Would others notice? And what did he mean by—

“Rin.”

Sesshomaru’s voice brought her back from catastrophizing. She looked up to him; any anger Sesshomaru might’ve had on his face was gone for her. His hand touched her back, fingers on the knot he’d redone.

“Let’s go,” Rin found her voice again, “ if we spend longer…”

“Alright.” 

They returned to the party without much notice . While the group had not moved from the taxidermy room Sesshomaru kept Rin well away from the wolf.  Rin saw Naraku talking to the hostess with his usual smile and charm. She was practically hooked on his every word and throwing back her head and laughing at almost everything he was saying. Sesshomaru pulled her towards another couple that looked just as uncomfortable as they fel t.

“Do you feel better, my dear? ”

Apparently, their hostess was much more  acute than Rin had earlier thought.

“Oh, yes—”

“Naraku was just telling me how  _ awful _ you were feeling,” the woman sighed deeply,  “come, you must eat; it’ll make you feel better !” she snapped her fingers and beckoned a servant come closer , “here.”

Rin was passed a small  piece of toast, her eyes looking down  at what was on the toast.  It was a dull grey substance, and had an oddly musky scent that made her nose winkle. Part of her was glad Sesshomaru’s senses were overstimulated so that he didn’t need to smell  what she should be eating.

“This looks lovely,” Rin tried to be polite, “what um… what is it?”

“ Ambergris !” she said with a flair, “an aphrodisiac my dear.”

“Oh,” again, Rin was at a loss for words, “ um…”

“Yes;  who knew such passion could be derived from  whale  excrement .”

Rin wasn’t the only one  who  pulled away at the information.

“Oh…”

“You really seem to like that  letter …”

“Yes,” Rin swallowed, her ears turning red with the attention on her, “well… ”

“My dear!” their hostess turned away to rush over to a nother couple , “you must try this! It will help with that baby you’ve been wanting!”

Without a word Rin took the opportunity and threw her  food into a nearby plant. If Sesshomaru  saw he said nothing . She wasn’t the only one throwing her food away discretely , but there was an unspoken rule between them to not tell her.

“How was it?”

In their wanderings,  they’d managed to meet up with Madame  Puanteur again, and she was looking down at  Rin over her nose.

“It… was unique,” Rin lied, hoping she wasn’t pressed further.

“Yes… I should think it would inspire passion tonight,” Rin immediately became more  uncomfortable, “I’m thinking of trying horse meat,” she looked pointedly at Rin, “don’t they eat that up North?”

All the eyes Rin had just managed to shake off were now firmly on her.

“N… Not where I’m from,” Rin said, “we… my father is in the  military , and it would be disrespectful to eat an animal that serves us so dutifully.”

“How odd,” their hostess seemed puzzled, “cows serve us dutifully, and we eat them. So do goats and  lambs—”

“It’s different, when it comes to war,” Rin quietly  interrupted, “or… so my  father’s told me.”

“He’s a  soldier! Of course he’d say that !” Rin bristled at the laugh.

“Careful, my dear,” Naraku waved his glass to the two of them, “Rin, like her husband, is very devoted to her father. She gets a bit defensive.”

“My father isn’t here to defend himself, is he?” the young woman  said, “so, until he is, I have too.”

“Or you could learn to laugh with the rest of us,” Naraku suggested.

“Maybe you could tell a funny joke,” Sesshomaru cut in, head tall.

“Your guard dog comes to your rescue  yet again,” Naraku whispered, glancing to Madame as she grew tired of the conversation.  “It’s a pity Koga couldn’t come,” Naraku  suddenly  commented, “he’d have just… eaten  you up.”

Sesshomaru pulled Rin behind him, his body  becoming more obviously aggressive.

“ Come now!” Naraku smiled, “l et us bury the hatchet ; becomes friends again.”

“Friends… again?”

Sesshomaru took a breath  and stepped beside Rin , moving around the half-demon.

“See… now that’s a funny joke,” Sesshomaru murmured, walking past.

Rin felt some satisfaction knowing they had the last word over Naraku .

“What was that comment, about Koga?”

“Do you remember what kind of demon Koga is?”

“A wolf—oh,” Rin  paused, “I mea n… I’ve met wolf demons before, and I was fine with them—” she swallowed, “but… ”

“Koga often travels with a pack of wolves; and there are rumors that he takes in those that attack farmers and  their livestock.”

Rin paused, feeling her heart rate rise again.

“Let’s not talk about this,” Sesshomaru pulled her away , “not now.”

They only stayed for a n hour or two more, and then they left with a few other guests who’d had enough. When they got home, both seemed d esperate to get out of their clothes and get them into the wash. Sesshomaru retreated into the bathroom to stick his head over a bowl of hot water.

Sesshomaru blew his nose yet again, hating how itchy it had become.  He felt like some five-year-old boy who couldn’t stop his runny nose. As frustrating as it was, he knew it was all thanks to that awful woman’s party and her horrific obsession with everything smelling like perfume. When he came home, he had a bowl of hot water  filled and kept his head over the steam to try and undo the  afternoon he’d had, to no avail.  Figuring his night would be filled with discomfort, he made his way back into his bedroom. 

He was surprised to see an empty bed. Rin had certainly been there when he’d gone into the bathroom; Kaede had come in  during that time, but she hadn’t said anything telling, only “it’s ready, My Lady”. With his nose in the state it was in, he couldn’t exactly find her by smell. Fortunately, she wasn’t the quietest woman.  She would often hum or sing as she walked, and she was beyond tip-toeing in the house . The demon walked down to the kitchens, hearing a plate scraping along  wood.

“Rin?”

Sesshomaru walked in on the young woman over a kitchen counter freezing with a mouthful of cheese and bread in her mouth and hunched over a plate of fruit. She stared at him, like a child that had been caught with her hand in the cookie jar, food making a mound in her cheek. 

“I’m sorry,” she mumbled, swallowing, “I was so hungry, and I couldn’t eat a thing at that woman’s party,” she looked down to her plate, “Kaede made me something to tide me over until tomorrow ,” Rin paused, “ she made you something too.”

The demon looked down at the  small meal Kaede had made him. Like his wife, he’d eaten nothing at that awful party ; even her food was overly scented and perfumed.

“At least her plant is fed,” Sesshomaru murmured,  picking up the sandwich all the same.

Rin went slightly red from this accusation .

“ I figured you were n’t going to eat it for me …”

The demon couldn’t hide his grimace.

“I appreciate you not putting me on the spot .”

“ And I wasn’t the only one,” Rin said, “there were at least three other crackers in there, and I swear I saw someone throw their drink out the window.”

“They did,” the demon said, rubbing his nose with the back of his hand.

“Are you alright?”

“My nose is sensitive,”  Sesshomaru said, “when I’m surrounded by that much stimulation I tend to get  irritated. It’ll pass by tomorrow.”

“ Guess it’s a good thing I don’t like perfumes,” Rin smiled,  resuming her chewing and going for her next bite.

“Why don’t you?”

“Father wouldn’t get me any,” Rin said simply, “ he always said ‘if you want to smell like a rose, go roll in the bush’,” she smiled at the memory, “ said they were too expensive for a little bottle.”

“Did you want them?”

Rin looked from him to her  small sandwich.

“I did,” she admitted, “all the other girls had them… and I wanted to fit in ,” she took a deep breath, “but that was never my lot in life… I was never meant to fit in…” her fingers fiddled with the  edge of a piece of fruit, “always been a bit weird…”

“You two are not the same, Rin.”

She huffed, looking up at him with a small smile.

“No?” Rin asked, “ we’re both outsiders. We’re both odd and—”

“You care for other people,” Sesshomaru’s words surprised her, “she never has. She enjoys putting people in  uncomfortable or awkward situations. You wouldn’t.”

Rin looked back down to her  fruit; for Sesshomaru, that was a very sweet compliment. 

“Why is her taste so…”

“Eclectic?” 

“ Yes .”

“As far as I know she’s lived on her own for years,” Sesshomaru said, “she’s an artist.”

“But… she knows your mother?”

“She’s done some paintings for her,” the demon shrugged, “ but they weren’t close friends or anything; at least, not according to my mother.”

“She seems lonely,” Rin said quietly, picking up a piece of melon , “I just wish her food wasn’t so terrible. I wouldn’t have minded trying new stuff,  but it was all flavoured so… horribly…”

“That’s not the worst thing about the party,” Sesshomaru muttered, “the worst part is InuYasha was right.”

Rin laughed at that .

“I won’t tell him if you won’t,” she said , popping in another piece of melon , chewing slowly ,  “ w hy is Naraku practically everywhere?” Rin asked .

“ He cares greatly about making friends in high places,” Sesshomaru said, “he wasn’t born into wealth like you or I , and he didn’t build himself up honestly like your father did. He made some less than savoury deals which got him to where he is.”

“But didn’t you use to associate with him?”

“I did,” Sesshomaru seemed irritated by this fact, “he hid his  indiscretions well, and he made himself out to be a member of a prominent family .”

“And it worked?”

“The family name had fallen into obscurity, and so he used it  to his advantage,” Sesshomaru told her, “ when I cut ties with him, his reputation suffered , as he’s been desperate to rebuild it, which means he’s involving himself in my social circles.”

“Why you, specifically?”

“Because I ruined his reputation in the first place; he’s vindictive ,” he paused, “and malicous.”

Rin looked at her husband, the man clearly in deep thought . What  was it that Sesshomaru found so uncomfortable?

“My Lady—”

They were interrupted  by Rin’s maid waking in with a hot cup of tea in her hands .

“It’s alright, Kaede,” Rin smiled, taking the cup from her before turning to Sesshomaru, “here.”

His brow lifted, looking down at a cup of tea she handed him .

“What’s this?”

“ My special tea,” Rin smiled, “I… brought this mixture from home. I use it a lot when I’m sick  or having allergies… it unclogs your nose and  helps you sleep.”

“What’s in it?”

“Uh… mint, lavender, orange peel, ” she listed off the ingredient on her fingers, “why? Is there anything you’re allergic too?”

“Just chamomile,” Sesshomaru said , grateful that even the hot steam was helping him.

“That’s in a different mix,” Rin said lightly, “there’s none in there!”

He looked from her to the tea, Rin pausing for a minute before she wrapped her arm around his.

“ Come on, it’s late. ”

They walked in step together, Sesshomaru still holding the tea  and had Rin  in his other arm. Despite it being an awful party, having someone to complain about it with was nicer than he thought. He kept thinking back to having her in his arms and his hands pulling her corset loose. He could still feel her breathing  in the palm of his hands  and her chest on his. Amber eyes glanced to her in her heavy robe pulled tight to her neck and  the cord around her waist. Would she let him  hold her like that aga in?

“Rin.”

She looked up to him, confusion in her big brown eyes. Slowly, he bent over  and gave her a gentle kiss on the lips, surprising her like she did him all those weeks ago . When he parted, he met her gaze, and she lifted herself up on her toes to kiss him again. Rin kept her hands on his chest, her fingers  returning to the feeling she had earlier in the night. He pulled back slowly, his eyes still on hers.

“You two! Get to bed!”

Both jumped like caught naughty children . The looked away from the old lady march ing around them to her own room, her nose in the air and a stern look on her face. Unwilling to speak on the matter, Rin smiled to him and walked up the stars first, her husband following with his cup of tea and wondering where they would have gone had Kaede not interrupted them.


	9. Training

Light hooves stomped the dirt path with a pair of boots walking in time with it. They paused every now and then for her to click her tongue and encourage the head up and away from the grass Tenseiga wanted to eat. 

“Come on!” Rin encouraged the animal into the stable, “let’s get you cleaned up.”

Tenseiga tossed his head, prancing up beside her, showing off his stunning lines and practiced gate.

“Show-off,” she teased, rubbing his neck.

Rin was finding her steps becoming lighter and lighter with each passing day . She was finding ways of enjoying her  life here and having freedom certainly helped.  She thought her days would be filled with boring lunches and women’s events and, though she was invited to a few, Sesshomaru never forced her to go. And so, Rin was allowed to spend as much time as she liked out riding  and reading and walking the woods, provided she returned home for dinner. He wouldn’t join her as much as she’d like, but he was still around her more than usual.  Their kiss after the horrendous part was not the last they’d shared; he was starting to kiss her before bed and  he would let her snuggle next to him in the evenings. It was made more romantic by fire crackling in their fireplace; a sign that cooler nights were coming. 

It made her wonder what fall would look like down here.

By now winter was making haste to her  home, and her father was likely starting to work with merchants and traders day and night in order to get harvest ready and sent out. She sniffed a little. Thinking of her father  no longer made her mope and cry, but it did still sting.

Rin looked towards the large arena that was hidden in the grounds. She never rode in it, finding the trails and woods much better on her health and on Tenseiga. The horse was getting better, despite his bad eyesight. It was a surprise though, to see Sesshomaru standing in the middle of the ring with another man. There was a great grey animal pounding the dirt around them, and it was evident the demon was in terse conversation with the man.

Curious, she made her way down, eyes watching the impatient animal stomp and rear and buck. It was not on a lead line, but it was wearing a bright red halter with gold buckles. The animal was big; it’s arched neck and tense muscles showed it’s strength was not just for show and it’s mane and coat shone in the sun  and flowed.

“You hit my horse like that again, and you’re finished,” Rin heard her husband hiss.

The man looked stunned and infuriated, as though no one had spoken to him like that before.

“It’s the only way sir—”

“Then get out.”

The man seemed stunned. Clearly no one had ever spoken to him like  that before and he wasn’t accustomed to it. He didn’t protest, but made a face like he’d swallowed acid and marched out of the ring, Sesshomaru giving him an  angered glare all the way.

Sesshomaru’s anger calmed slightly when he saw Rin standing by the fence, eying the man that passed her . She leaned away, ignoring the mutterings  and frustrations coming from under his breath.

“Did you need something Rin?” Sesshomaru asked, looking back to the horse.

“No… just curious,” she shrugged, stepping up close ,  “ w ho is this?”

Sesshomaru seemed surprised that she  had come up to the gate. Tenseiga’s reins were in her hand and  she was still dressed in her riding  gear.

“New horse,” Sesshomaru said, watching the tense animal pace on the other side of the area, “and  an incompetent trainer.”

“Why is he so incompetent?”

“He thinks beating an animal into submission is the best way to break it,” he walked over to her, Tenseiga  walking up to sniff at the hand he extended out, “ Tenseiga’s looking well.”

“He’s getting lots better,” Rin turned to the  old horse,  laughing quietly,  “ ey ? Yeah…” she looked back to the big beast that was  stamping impatiently,  “what are you going to do about him?”

“I’ll see if he calms down,” Sesshomaru followed her gaze, “he  won’t, but he’ll at least tire enough so that  I can get closer without him lunging at me.”

“What if he never does?”

Sesshomaru only glanced back, his gaze unblinking  and looking right through her. It was apparent he understood her metaphor. 

“I mean,” Rin felt her nerves rising, “what if he never accepts you, and refuses to be tamed.”

Still nothing.  Rin had learned from her father that  silence was an unconventional  tool that few men wielded effectively. That was never his style, but he did respect men who could.  Sesshomaru, it appeared, was one of those few men.

“Then he wasn’t meant to be ridden.”

The tension relaxed once he spoke, and Rin only realized she was holding her breath once she let it out.

“What will you do about him?”

“Keep him,” Sesshomaru shrugged, “no one would take an animal that can’t be ridden, and he can’t be released into the wild , there’s nowhere for him to go.”

“So…”

“I’ve got a place for him,” the demon said, watching as it’s tail  swished down and it bucked, “ but that’s for later, if I’ve run out of choices.”

“Just like that?”

Sesshomaru had his brow lifted when he looked back to her.

“Well… isn’t he for  work ?” Rin asked, rubbing  Tenseiga’s ear.

“He’s a horse first,” Sesshomaru held his head a little higher, “my father  drilled that into our heads.”

“I see…”

Sesshomaru looked back to her and then to the old horse reaching out to him for more pats.

“You better get Tenseiga back to the stables,” Sesshomaru said, obliging the horse all the same, “ it would get bad if  Tokijin decided to fight him.”

“Oh! Right! Sorry! ”

She tugged the animal along, the horse wanting to stay with its old master but didn’t fight her. He plodded along, tail lax and head  sniffing at the ground.

Rin tur n ed back in time to see the big horse run up on Sesshomaru and then suddenly stop inches from him. She paused,  wondering if she needed to run back should the horse decide to kick her husband. Slowly, the demon’s hand reached up to  touch the animal’s muzzle, the steely gaze never leaving  Tokijin’s . They stayed like that for a minute more before the horse moved away at a trot , shaking it’s head and holding it’s tail up high.

“Come on,” Rin said , pulling the horse away from a place she’d very much like to be.

The horse nickered, following her into the cool shade and letting her take off his tack and then brush him down, from head to tail. Rin patted Tenseiga down, smiling at how the horse seemed to be looking happier in her presence. 

“Good boy,” she whispered, rubbing him behind his ears before turning him outside to wander the fields.

When she returned to clean up, Sesshomaru’s other horses stuck their noses out for their usual slice of apple or piece of carrot. Rin happily gave those that wanted it treats, but she was always careful never to give them too much. They were on strict diets of only the best Sesshomaru could get his hands on, and she’d seen the extensive research he’d put into feeding his animals. They were fed well and kept in comfort. Rin passed out her treats, rubbed a few on the nose, and then left to clean up.

It was becoming her routine; up early, ride Tenseiga around, and wash up. After that, she hadn’t really sorted herself out. There were shops she could ride down and visit, but Rin didn’t like spending the money on the dresses. It made her very uncomfortable. The mustard-yellow dress she pulled on that was patched up ten times over made her feel so much more comfortable.  Sesshomaru’d seen her in it only once before but said nothing. His expressions were hard for Rin, as he mostly kept himself to himself. So long as she wore it on days when it was just them, Rin was going to assume it was fine until told otherwise. 

Rin looked around her room, still looking for ways to satiate her boredom. It was made all the more difficult  when she was worried about her husband in a riding ring with a n animal as stubborn and strong as he was.

Said husband was watching his horse run and run, the animal studying him for a few moments at a time before he snorted, shook his head, and ran again, bucking and striking out at nothing but air. Any other rider might not have teeth by this point. The moment Sesshomaru had seen this horse he knew he had to have him. The animal was spirited  sure, but it was also strong and fast. He had been  saddle-trained, and came from a good stock.

“How’s he doing?”

Sesshomaru was surprised to find his wife had returned , this time without a great black beast in tow.

“ Better,” Sesshomaru said , never keeping his eye off the animal for very long, “he’s starting to test me now.”

“Are you passing?”

She had moved, now leaning over the door that was the entrance to the arena. Her arms were crossed and her face was resting in the crooks, her big, expressive eyes looking up at him.

“ Right now, I’m not sure.”

Rin hummed, leaning over to watch her husband watching the horse. She knew this probably wasn’t the safest place  to be when a horse was  working out its anger, but she  trusted Sesshomaru. It was his aura. It just screamed strength and confidence. 

“Lord Sesshomaru!”

Rin closed her eyes. For all the work she was doing with Sesshomaru, Jaken was another matter entirely.  She and her husband glanced back t o the imp that was pelting towards them.

“Jaken’s very enthusiastic… isn’t he?” Rin asked, rubbing her ears at the sight of the assistant running across the field to them.

“ One of his many qualities, yes,” Sesshomaru sighed, “but he’s  incredibly knowledgeable , and useful to have around,” he looked down to the running imp, “what is it?”

“Lord  Onishi has called for you again—”

“Hang up.”

Jaken looked from Sesshomaru to the manor and then up to Rin , who was looking up and away in order not to laugh at his antics.

“He-He already did, my Lord,” Jaken said , “are you sure you wish to discuss—”

“I will discuss nothing  further with him,” Sesshomaru said, keeping h is eyes on the horses, “so whether Rin is present or not is of no consequence.”

Brown eyes glanced to the imp and then to her husband. She knew he was hiding something from  her, but she still felt too new to pry , no matter how insane it was driving her. Jaken would always hush when she was in the room,  and Sesshomaru was careful what he revealed around her.

“Lord Sesshomaru, if I might just get in there to speak with you a moment…”

“I wouldn’t,” Rin muttered, cheek in her hand.

“Why ever not you silly—”

Jaken’s answer came in the form of a loud bang as  Tokijin bucked and slammed his hooves into the  wood supports.

“That’s why,” Rin said, hiding her grin at the imp’s blush. Even Sesshomaru  gave a glance back at his assistant.

“O-O-Oh…”

“You’d get kicked  clear across the field,” Rin could stop laughing at the image of the imp flying from the bucking hooves , “sorry!”

“Stop laughing!” Jaken stamped his foot,  “bodily harm is not funny!”

“It is when it happens to  you ,” Rin coughed, hoping Jaken hadn’t heard her , she took a moment to compose herself, “he seems very wild.”

“He’s actually  been broken in,” Sesshomaru murmured, “but he still has a lot of spirit.  As strong as he is , he just needs to adjust to me. He’ll yield, but not in totality.”

“Isn’t he for shows?” Rin asked.

“It’s not the primary reason I own these animals,” Sesshomaru said, “I might not ride as much as I used too, but  they’re for me to ride.”

“Oh…”

Her fingers  fidgeted, wondering just how Sesshomaru could stand so steady and so calm for so long. 

“He looks like he’s calming down,” Rin said lightly , needing to  fill the silence with  _ anything _ .

“You’d think so…”

Rin was immediately made to eat her words as the horse made another dash across the dirt enclosure , kicking up dust and debris as it sharply turned around.

“Or not,” she sighed, her ego deflating slightly.

“Lord Sesshomaru is an expert with horses!” Jaken announced proudly, “you could learn a thing or two from him!”

“Uh huh,” Rin looked back to her husband before she took two big steps back.

“What are you  gonna learn from—”

_ BANG _ !

Jaken jumped about a foot in the air as  Tokijin bolted at the three of them only to slam its front hooves into the  gate .

“I’m nowhere near as good as he is,” Rin commented,  “but I know when it’s  gonna have  a go at you and when you need to give it it’s space.”

Jaken swallowed, looking a little embarrassed , and turned on his heel and ran back to the manor.

“Is it going to hurt itself?” Rin asked, now genuinely concerned.

“ I have an eye on him and  I have  a veterinarian coming by this evening to see to him,” Sesshomaru said, “ he needs a physical; last time we tried it he nearly took off the man’s hand.”

“ What if he doesn’t exhaust himself by then?”

“ There’s a reason he’s not on a lead line right now.”

“ Huh?”

“He’s an intelligent animal; so long as I don’t make him desperate, he’ll stay safe,” he looked back at her, “I won’t ride him until he’s given a clean bill of health.”

“Oh …”

She  stayed out with Sesshomaru until she started to shiver in the chill.  Her husband ordered her insid e, and she didn’t protest. Rin dined alone that night, Sesshomaru only entering once it had turned dar k. He walked his way up to the library, where he took his dinne r .  Jaken bothered him only once, and Rin stayed away until her boredom demanded company. 

Rin walked into the library, pausing at the doorway at the sight of her husband.  Sesshomaru was sitting on the couch, his left arm over the back and his right holding a report. There was an air of peace around him, and his shoulders were relaxed. His amber eyes weren’t calculated and cold, but softer, taking on an almost warm honey colour. Taking a deep breath, Rin quietly walked over to him, Sesshomaru glancing to her once before back to his paper. She sat next to him, leaning into the demon’s side and pulling his arm around her, her fingers holding his.

Her husband did not pull away. He watched her as she snuggled into his side, but he didn’t fight her. He was slightly bewildered by her seemingly sudden desire to be close to him, but did not question it. Once she was settled, Rin took another deep breath and encouraged herself to relax.

Rin couldn’t take the quiet.

“How’s  Tokijin ?”

“Calmed down enough for us to get a blanket on his back and in a stall for the night,” Sesshomaru murmured,  “he’s making progress.”

“Well that’s good,” Rin said , “it would be sad if you worked with him all this time, just for him to hurt himself or not co-operate…”

She trailed off , her feet rubbing against each other and her fingers fidgeting.

“How’re Kagome and InuYasha?”

“Kagome’s asked after you,” Sesshomaru said, “ InuYasha’s… InuYasha,” the demon seemed to sour .

“Huh…”

Again, silence. Rin could feel her heartbeat in her throat , her anxieties rising because of it.

“How’s your father?”

It was the first time he’d asked her. Slightly bewildered , she thought as to the reason why, and then sighed when she remembered that a piece of mail  came for her from her home with her father’s unkempt sprawl all over it.

“He’s well,” Rin said, “busy… so he won’t write to me for a while now… but I knew that he wouldn’t … he barely has time for  anything other than work now and he’ll be that busy for a few months or so . He asked after you, and I told him  you’re doing well—"

“ Y ou miss your father, don’t you?”

Rin stopped speaking, her heart sinking .  She swallowed the lump that suddenly formed in her throat.  Of course he knew; he knew everything that went on in their house. Rin picked at her fingers, thinking of how to tell him , if she should tell him. Though they were just now starting to warm up, she still felt  uncomfortable t elling him her fears and insecurities. He would just brush them off, unable to relate to her or understand why they made her feel uncomfortable.

“Yes,” she whispered , closing her eyes against the tears that wanted to slip out , “his letters are great, but it doesn’t compare,” she sniffed, “it’s different, not to have him near me. Tell me all his old stories,”  her lips pulled into a smile , “he always said I was just like mom… ”

“You have his courage.”

Her fingers stopped mingling  with each other and she stilled. Sesshomaru never said much to her about her father, clearly preferring to keep out whenever possible .  The demon also rarely said anything he did not mean .

“To leave your home and all you know for the health of your family; it takes great courage,” Sesshomaru said, “it is admirable.”

“It wasn’t some great leap of faith,” Rin admitted, “I knew you, and your father,” she shrugged, “and my father trusts the both of you too.”

“It is still more than others are willing to do for their families,” Sesshomaru told her, “despite everything you accepted my proposal and came here, to marry me,” his face fell for a moment, “but then again, you were always fearless as a child, weren’t you?”

Rin paused. They never talked about the times they had as children, but she distinctly remembered that they didn’t play very often, as Sesshomaru would want to be near to his father.

“I grew up with brothers,” Rin said, “if I didn’t play with them, I’d be very lonely,” she rubbed her wrist, “but you were always a proper lord, even as a child,” she smiled, “you hated getting muddy and messy.”

Sesshomaru looked over her smile, his head standing a little taller.

“My mother was very strict about what I could and could not do for physical activity,” Sesshomaru said, “she always told me a young lord must be presentable at all times, regardless of company. You father seemed to disagree, and always wanted me playing with you four.”

“I think he got a kick out of you being so stiff and formal,” Rin laughed quietly, “your father knew how to be calm and relaxed, but you were so young and so serious…” she licked her lips, “do you… ever just wish you could throw away your training and just…  _ be… _ kind of  like your brother is?”

“As I said—”

“But do you?” Rin pressed, “even just for a little while?”

Sesshomaru looked down at her , Rin keeping  her eyes  on the arm rest of the couch. He stood up slowly, disturbing he r. Now she watched him, the demon extending his hand to her.

“I am not in a position to do so,” Sesshomaru said, “but there are times…”

“You can, you know…”

She took his hand,  letting him help her.

“If it’s just me…” she  took his arm , “you don’t have to hold on to formalities and tradition so closely. I won’t tell anyone.”

Sesshomaru turned back to Rin, the young woman walking beside him.

“Thank you,” Sesshomaru said, “but I’ve lived so long like this, I doubt I know how to relax.”

“I can teach you that,” she returned to his arm, “no mud, I promise.”

The demon walked her into their shared bedroom, enjoying the feeling of her on his arm.

“I’m not a very good student, I’m afraid,” Sesshomaru told her, “too stubborn, my instructors said,” he shut the door behind them, “but that’s not to say a break from this wouldn’t go a miss.”

“If you want a break from all this, it’s not too late to start,” Rin said, walking over to the closet to change, “ it’s just a break; not forever. L ike I said… I won’t tell anyone.”

“Where do you propose we start?” Sesshomaru asked her, taking off his jacket.

“How about tomorrow?” Rin called, “we could go for a walk together.”

Sesshomaru could hear her steel herself. She was very clearly waiting for the word no.

“How about a ride  n ext week instead ? ”

Rin perked up at this; a ride? Just the two of them? No meetings or boring lunches or  work; just them?

“Sure,” she said, not caring how eager she sounded, “um… to-to where are we going?”

“Nowhere, just a ride to get  Tokijin used to me.”

“That sounds wonderful,” Rin  came to stand in font of him, “it won’t interfere with your work?”

“ I wouldn’t offer if it did. ”

She couldn’t stop herself from grinning at this. 

“Yeah…” Rin smiled, “okay… Tenseiga wants a more challenging ride I think…” she bounced on the balls of her feet and shot him one last smile before  she turned in for the night.

Sesshomaru watched her, and then moved to the  closet to change. It was their ritual now, and  he saw nothing of her beyond her shoulders and collarbone.  When he peeked  out, he immediately took a step back.

Rin was in their bed , checking for him before she gently pulled at the top two buttons at her  nightgown and pulled  her hair to frame her face and her chest. H e watched as she fluffed her pillows and relaxed slowly , her hands on her stomach. The demon could hear her heart thumping in her chest , and not for the first time either.

He wasn’t stupid; they were  now three months into their marriage and it still hadn’t been consummated. It clearly bothered Rin, as now she was starting to look into ways to be closer to him , and to preen herself in the way she saw  other women act . The demon closed his eyes ; kisses were one thing, but  sex? He could picture it now, her voice saying  it was okay , but the tears in her eyes saying a different story. If  she were hurt in anyway during it, it wou ld colour every experience she had from there on out.

His partners in the past enjoyed the feelings of his claws and teeth on their flesh , but Rin? Marks like that wouldn’t heal for days and she’d be forced to look at them  everyday when she got  dressed or had a bath. That was nothing to say about the pain , especially when he was her first experience. Right now, he didn’t know how to be  gentle . With a deep breath he returned to their bed, Rin  watching him all the way , even as he turned around and went to bed with his back to her. As usual, she said nothing about it, but Sesshomaru could feel  her  disappointment rising . He wished he had the words to tell her it wasn’t what she was or wasn’t doing, but  how this could hurt her . Not that she would believe him; she’d been told how dangerous things were down here so often it didn’t  phase her.

Rin ’s hand touched his back , another effort  to get close to him. In response he  rolled over, allowing her to come to his chest. He glanced down, the undone buttons letting him look down . Sesshomaru sharply inhaled, raising his head and forcing himself to look away and calm down. The more disappointed he made her, the more she’d do to please him , which would make it that much harder for him to turn her down. Either way, it seemed like  he would hurt her. He took a deep breath,  wondering just how long kisses and touch would satiate her, and it made him wonder just how long it would satiate him.


	10. Horse Ride

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Wednesday y'all!
> 
> Yashahime is just loving teasing us and then giving us nothing, doesn't it XD Until we get some answers, here's an update!

“Good morning!”

Rin practically bounced as she walked towards the stables,  her husband and stable hands turning to  her approaching feet.

“Hope I’m not overdressed,” she commented bashfully, her hand  running over her brown skirts and adjusting her coat .

“ Not at all,” the demon murmur ed, he in a black riding uniform and his hair was tied back with a n ornate silver clip.

Rin smiled up at her husband, grateful that her excitement was keeping the fatigue at bay.

She had hardly slept a moment last night, too energetic about perhaps getting to spend a good  time alone with her new husband. Perhaps she might even  get a chance to show off her skill in the art of riding .

Perhaps she might impress her husband.

At the very least, she would spend some time on an animal that relaxed her greatly  with a man she was still dying to know. After three months she felt she should have known more about him by now.

“Bring him out,” Sesshomaru called, the stable boys nodding nervously and doing their best to pull out the impressive animal.

Rin gasped quietly at the sight of Sesshomaru’s horse. He was a tall beast,  with wild eyes and supple muscles that seemed to quiver. His coat, a beautiful silver,  was glossy and his blackened mane was neat and straight. The bridle and saddle it was adorned with was  black leather and polished silver.

“ Here he is ,” Sesshomaru  said quietly, his eyes looking over the animal tossing his head in frustration.

“ He looks so beautiful ,” Rin breathed, her fingers pulling the leather glove off her hand to offer it to the  flaring nostrils, a hand on her wrist stopping her.

“He’s still  quite wild,” the demon commented, “ he’s  could still bite .”

“O-Oh,” the young woman seemed embarrassed, chastising herself for looking so  green around horses in front of her new husband.

“ Tenseiga is over there,” his head jerked to the slender animal following behind one of the younger stable hands.

Rin walked calmly towards the old horse. Since Sesshomaru had given her permission to take him out, he’d gotten in better shape, and he seemed more and more comfortable out with his saddle on. His ears flicked up at the sound of her approaching. He turned to look at her, taking a step towards her, his nose out for the usual treat she had for him.

“Hello Tenseiga,” Rin crooned, “ have you been a good boy? ”

The animal only nickered in response,  nostrils flaring at the touch of the hand on its snout.

Rin giggled as the animal dug into the palm of her hand, her  breath warm even through the glove and her whiskered twitching about on her  fingers.

“No treats now,” Rin whispered, “later, okay?”

She was truly excited to be riding with someone again.

And to be doing something with her husband that didn’t involve  staying cooped up in the house. She was honestly about to go stir crazy sitting in there.

The young woman looked back to her husband, the demon standing proud as he was checking the lines of his strong beast , his bare fingers running  up and down the lines and thick muscles.

“Lord Sesshomaru!”

Was it so wrong of Rin to hope that the imp might fall flat on his face as he pelted out to his demon master?

“What?”

“Lord Ono has called on you!”

“I said to handle it ,” Sesshomaru flexed his hand in his glove.

“He is insisting on  _ you _ , my Lord!” Jaken insisted.

Sesshomaru sighed, looking from his  fidgeting horse to the imp.

“Try to calm him,” Sesshomaru ordered, his head turning to Jaken, “tell Lord Ono I’ll be with him in a moment,” without changing his tone he looked to Rin, “you may  carry on without me; I’ll catch up.”

“Right,” the young wo man murmured, her heart sinking.

She  was starting to  think they were getting better, piece by piece, but there were moments like this that made her throat thicken .

I t was how easily he transitioned…

“ Milady.”

Rin turned to look at the young man, he clearly getting ready to help the young woman up into the stirrups .

“I’ll be okay,” Rin gently dismissed, the groom’s confusion turning into surprise as Ri n stuck her foot in the stirrup and swung her leg over the saddle.

“Always have had an easy time riding,” the young woman laughed at his face, her  body moving into a comfortable position as she turned the animal towards the road, “ thank you though!”

Sesshomaru had, thankfully, shown her a map of the route  they was set to take . Not to say she had the best sense of direction or memory, but she knew enough to find her way onto the road and back again. Fortunately, their lunch partners were on the  same road as they were,  and Rin was sure she could recognize the hous e by, according to  her husband,  the gaudy white doors.

The horse seemed to prefer a  quick yet  delicate gate, the body  steady as it began it’s walk down the lane. Ears bright and alert, the head turned and lo oked around, drinking in  his first time in a new setting as her rider was.

She was grateful for the  clear air, the gentle breeze through her hair and down her lungs . Fresh air was always something that could calm her shaking nerves, regardless of how bad a day she was  having.

Or how  long the months .

It hurt, to be treated like an employee of his.

She was his wife… w asn’t that supposed to mean something?

Rin felt her smile fall. Her wedding and marriage wasn’t supposed to be  like this, was it? H ere she was, confused and wondering where to go next and what to do. Sesshomaru wasn’t giving her any  clues as to her next step and but he was letting her lead.

Her father would have been so disappointed in the situation.

She wondered if the news might kill him.

A wave of panic flooded through her at the thought. Head shaking, she tried to  break it loose.

Her father’s health had been declining steadily over the last few years, the doctor warning him about his heart’s health, yet still he persisted. Running the business,  dealing with every little thing in his family,  and now having to work with a new son-in-law whos e business was more powerful than the elder’s ever could be.

If he died because of the stress she caused him…

She didn’t think she could live with herself after all that.

A part of her wanted to shake loose the sadness, but another part of her knew that avoiding that sadness would only make it worse. The months she’d spent here didn’t make her miss her home and her family any less. But she didn’t want to feel sad when  she was trying to make her life down here work.

Confused, Rin turned to the sound of approaching  hoof beats , her eyes widening as she saw her husband ride up almost masterfully to her, the stallion’s neck arched and his feet  high. The long mane was loose, a surprise as Rin would have thought Sesshomaru would have insisted that the animal’s hair be knotted.

“You ride fast,” the demon commented, his horse maintaining it’s composure as it’s rider slowed it to Rin’s pace.

“I’m… used to riding quickly ,” Rin told him, her gloved hand reaching to pat the dark neck, “ he’s fairly sensitive in the mouth and side though…”

“He’s always been like that.”

“Did you used to ride him?” Rin asked, “when you were  a kid?”

“ Not on him,” Sesshomaru shook his head, “ I used to ride Tessaiga , but not Tenseiga .”

“Does your father still have Tessaiga?”

“No,” the demon’s face soured slightly, “he was given to my brother.”

“Right… you mentioned that before, didn’t you?” Rin felt  embarrassed now , “ uhmm …”

“ Hey !”

Both Rin and her horse twitched at the voice, the demon looking frustrated as  he pulled his  horse’s mouth away from the  old horse he was curiously sniffing at.

“Away,” Sesshomaru told  Tokijin gruffly,  the animal grunting in protest . Despite his words being harsh, Rin saw him be careful with the reins, and the animal wasn’t frothing at the bit or fighting against it. If anything, Sesshomaru kept the animal’s neck relaxed and gave him it’s head

“Thought you’d be the kind of man who’d want a tamed horse,” Rin commented lightly, watching as the animal, albeit  begrudgingly , fell back in line, it’s neck stretching and the demon letting him.

To this Sesshomaru said nothing, his amber eyes flickering up to her for a moment before he encouraged the animal’ s head back up.

“Do you ride often?” Rin asked, the silence almost too much for her to bear.

“When I can,” the demon told her,  “whenever work permits me.”

“ Do you like it?” she pressed, determined to hear something other than the stomping of horse hooves.

“I suppose,”  Sesshomaru murmured, his eyes glancing to her, “ given how often you ride, it’s  safe to assume you do.”

“Oh yes,” Rin gushed, “I love  it! It’s so nice to have this connection with a creature that won’t judge you.”

“ Hm …”

The demon watched as she rea ched down to pat the glossy neck, a calm smile on her lips.

“So! To where are we riding?”

Sesshomaru glanced to her, his face impassive and the silence making her adjust in her seat.

“ I mean… not that our ride needs to have a destination in mind, but I’m still getting my bearings about this place you see and you would reasonably know more than I-”

She stopped short, her throat swallowing thickly and cheeks burning out of  embarrassment .

“Oh … I’m doing it again… aren’t I?” she asked nervously, “going on and on about something like I know what I’m talking about…”

“As I said, this is just a ride to see how  Tokijin acts with me on him,” Sesshomaru explained,  “after this, I’ll adjust what I need too and come back.”

“How’s he doing?” Rin looked to the horse, wanting to reach out and pet him.

“He’s frustrated…”

Rin  nodded, wondering how he could be so good reading his horse, and yet be so oblivious to every hint she dropped.  She was trying hard to get him to do more with her, and not just spending time in a room with her. But no matter how many buttons she plucked off or  what smells she tried, he would do absolutely nothing. What had happened to him that he would have no interest in her?

“I’ll be a moment,” Sesshomaru said, startling her out of her thoughts.

He  turn ed to the open field and leaving Rin to watch as he encouraged the horse to just run. Rin pulled Tenseiga  to a slow stop, watching as the horse took the what lead Sesshomaru gave him and hammered his hooves over the open  grass. He looked just as wild when he was the paddock , but with a proper saddle and bridle on hi m he was even more handsome. Sesshomaru looked just as good, his muscles tight and his form fit on the animal. Even as  Tokijin adjusted and made a kick now and then Sesshomaru seemed to  be ready for whatever was thrown his way. He really was breathtaking.

It made her heart beat a little fa ster at the sight of him, and she wondered for a moment if she ever made him feel that about her. It wasn’t like she could fully show off on Tenseiga, given how the old the horse was . The last thing she wanted to do was hurt the old man who carried her through the  forest .

The clomping returned to her , Sesshomaru barely breathing hard while the horse was huffing. It’s tail swished , loose and languid, and  it was tossing it’s head around.

“ That was magnificent,” Rin said, patting  Tenseiga’s neck, “ you looked  beautiful ,  Tokijin .”

The anima l seemed to enjoy the praise. It arched its neck and pranced a bit in her presence . Sesshomaru seemed displeased at the creature showing off, but he didn’t force it to fall in line.

“He’s a bit of a show-off too,” she laughed, “ guess that’s a good thing.”

Sesshomaru  looked at her settle back pro perly into the saddle, keeping his horse under tighter rein around Rin.

“Let’s carry on,” Sesshomaru said,  heading back out to the road with a sweating  Tokijin , “hopefully he’s calmed down now.”

Tokijin marched with a practiced ease. He trotted  on ahead, determined to lead the herd of two.

“Where’d you learn how to ride?” Rin asked, trotting beside Sesshomaru.

“Part of my upbringing,” Sesshomaru said,  “ it was taught in boarding schools and my father and mother brought in trainers to help further it along ,” he looked to her, “and yourself?”

“Nowhere near as  nice as you,” Rin laughed, “I never showed anything,  and I barely know any of the terms,  but I loved to jump… I think the closest would be hunting? But father never took me out hunting and I didn’t want to go anyway—”

She wondered why Sesshomaru just let her speak.  He just let her ramble on and on . It didn’t matter that she wasn’t using proper grammar  or was getting mixed up; he just let her speak. If only he  talked back to her, even a little bit.

“What’s down that way?”

Amber eyes followed her finger to the tall grove of trees that grew  before the dip in the land. There was a dirt path that connected it to the road, and Sesshomaru knew the owner of the private property didn’t mind visitors.

“A  wide river ,” Sesshomaru said, “the creek that runs through my property connects to it .”

“Is it nice?”

Her question was  innocent enough, and it was obvious she was dying to travel down the path to the unknown.

“Let’s go,” he said, turning around to talk to her.

Rin urged Tenseiga to follow, the horse needing a moment as it was now  venturing into unknown territory.

They walked through a field and then trees, the path becoming more roots and dirt  and started to dip down. Rin smelt nature permeate the trees, and she was noticing that some of the colours were starting to change into a stunning pallet of oranges and reds and yellows mixed in with the dominate green. Tenseiga seemed nervous, and Rin spent most of her time shushing and scratching at his withers. Sesshomaru led them slowly,  Tokijin now extremely curious about his surroundings.  The two horses rounded the bank of a large river, Rin looking out at a wide and long strip of reflective water, the  surface broken and disturbed by the birds that were feasting before their trip south.

“Wow…” Rin whispered, looking around at the peaceful  setting.

Sesshomaru dismounted, pulling the reins over the proud horse while his wife mirrored him. Instead of  trying to fight Tenseiga, she walked him towards the water.

“Come on,” she encouraged sweetly, “you need a drink…”

Tenseiga followed her to the edge of the water, Sesshomaru watching them  before he  encouraged Tokijin to do the same. The horse seemed reluctant, but he let himself be led all the same.

“This place is beautiful,” Rin  said, “never thought this would exist  here.”

“What do you mean by that?”

“I just… when I was moving down here, I thought this would all be city,” Rin kept her eyes trained on the  river , “I never thought there’d be this much wildlife around me. I thought I’d be leaving it all behind…” she inhaled deeply, “it’s nice…”

Sesshomaru stepped  to the other side of his horse,  looking down before he followed her eyesight. In parties and at home she was as good as her teaching. She learned fast but there was also something missing; her usual spark wasn’t  bright enough against the parties and ladies and gentlemen all vying to be noticed , bu t she also didn’t fight to be the top of the crowd. Instead, she preferred to smile and nod and let herself go unnoticed. 

But out here? And in his forests? She was so full of life and so bright it was criminal to bring her back and dull it , even a little bit . He could see she was desperate to pull out the long pin in her hair but  she stopped; probably thinking about what Kaede would tell her when they got home. Corsets were one thing, but a fanciful up do? Even he wasn’t that skilled.

“This is almost like  what we would do during our courtship period.”

Her quiet comment made her look back to her. She had said it without realizing and was now starting to turn her usual shade of red.

“I mean… right? This is what you do, right?  I mean, you in general not you—s ince we never-um—”

“You wouldn’t have been allowed to be alone with me.”

She  paused, her verbal flailing  slowed by his comment. He was right; she wouldn’t have allowed to be left alone with him.

“But… since we were engaged ….”

“Your father wouldn’t have left you alone with me ,” Sesshomaru pointed out, “engaged or no.”

“That’s… fair,” Rin conceded before a small smile crept up on her face,  “ he would probably stand… right there,” she pointed to the spot in the trees behind them, “ probably with his stern face,” she laughed quietly, “never was one for false niceties .”

The demon watched her smile fall a little . 

“He must miss  you, you know.”

“I know, ” Rin nodded , “but he’s busy now… and he has  my brothers.”

“Your brothers are not you ,” he gently tucked a stray hair behind her ear , “it’s fine to miss your home.”

Rin turned to him, his hand slowly pulling away  but his eyes locked on hers.

“Um… T- Tokijin seems a bit  fidgety,” Rin whispered, pointing to the stallion.

“He is,” the demon took the reins in his hand,  “ I’ll take  him for a walk ,” Sesshomaru murmured, “I’ll be  back.”

Rin nodded, watching him take the horse down the bank. Sesshomaru did look back, receiving a little wave from her.

Sesshomaru walked  Tokijin along the river, trying to keep the antsy animal moving . It decided to splash along the water’s bank , the velvet snout sniffing at the water. He was a little  perturbed to  have his  trousers wet, but he only gave the animal more distance. 

He had planned to  visit her and properly court her , but when something came up, he was forced to abandon his plans,  much to the disappointment of both her and his father. While  the situation was explained and  understood , her father had still expressed his displeasure openly and even threatened to call the whole thing off. He’d been lucky, he supposed, that Rin had calmed  her father down enough to give the demon an undeserved second chance .

How many more did he have?

“Come on.”

Deciding they’d traveled far enough, Sesshomaru encouraged the animal  to turn around, the horse tossing its great head and trying to grab a leaf. As sad as Rin got talking about her family, it was what she needed . She was also pretty good at taking time for herself in order to let herself feel what she needed too. Not that Sesshomaru was much help in that regard.

He came back to Tenseiga  still drinking water. He lifted his head to look at the demon as best he could, but Sesshomaru knew it was out of habit now.  Tenseiga’s eyesight had been declining steadily over the years, and despite Rin’s ability to  get him back in shape, it would do nothing to stop his vision vanishing.  Tokijin was kept well away from the old horse, tied to a tree where he could pick at some tufts of grass while the demon put his hand on  Tenseiga’s forehead. The animal was still so loyal after all these years.

Lifting his head, Sesshomaru looked to where Rin had settled. She had climbed up on  a rock  as tall as he was  and was  lying on her back with her legs hanging over the edge .  Her eye s were staring up at the sky, her  hands over her midriff . The small plateau was only a few steps from the horse, and she’d been around Tenseiga enough to know h e wouldn’t stray far, especially when she’d tied his reins loosely to a sturdy branch.

“What are you doing?”

Big brown eyes looked to him, her head turning for a moment before she turned back up to the sky.

“Nothing,” Rin shrugged, “just… wondering …”

“Wondering what?”

She paused, and then:

“W hat it would be like to fly…”

Sesshomaru watched her stare off into the blue sky, her face peaceful and  dreamy.

It reminded him of when they were young . 

He’d been over visiting for one of his summers. For the first time in forever, the whole family was entertaining Sesshomaru and his father. Rin was sitting on the couch, her legs too short to touch the floor so they were left swinging  in open air. She was quiet and she was staring off into some unknown space outside the window. Even as a child, a part of him wanted to know what that little world she would often escape too was like. What could be so amazing that she felt compelled to return too day after day? Maybe it wasn’t for him to know.

“Rin…”

She turned back to  him, the bubbliness replaced with  an innocent serenity. It was odd for someone to be able to go to both ends of the spectrum so easily, and yet  both fit her well enough .

“ Hm ?”

“ If you ever go in, you need to b e careful with the river,” he warned, “the under current is stronger than  it appears.”

“Yeah…” Rin hummed, “too cold to go swimming anyhow…”

To this he glanced to her boots, noticing how the laces on her right heel were not knotted the same as when she had left the house.

She sat up, twigs on her back and a few leaves stuck  to her shoulders.

“Let’s go back,” Rin suddenly said, “I’m getting hungry.”

Brushing off what she could, she started to make her way down,  helped by the demon reaching up to her. With a small smile, she took his offer and let herself be brought down.  She liked the way his arms felt wh en he lifted her into the air. Her feet fluttered to the ground, her hands on his bicep and her eyes looking up to him. The demon couldn’t help himself; he pulled her close and kissed her. Rin lift ed up on her tip toes to reach him , meeting him.

She was becoming more and more bold with him, a side he wasn’t entirely opposed too. They kissed for a few moments longer, before he found himself wanting  to venture further. It wasn’t the first time he wanted this, but it was the first time he was going to  give in. Lips moved to the corner of her jaw , Rin inhaling sharply .  He kissed her jawline, teeth gently scraping against her  skin.  Her fingers slipped behind his neck, pressing him closer to her. Rin’s other hand came to her high collar, the tips touching the  cloth buttons before Sesshomaru suddenly pulled back.

His moment of impulse was just that; a moment. The demon was careful to not sharply back away from her, but  he stayed close, looking down at her mildly confused face. Whether that was for what  he’d just done or why he moved away he didn’t ask to clarify.

“ We should go,” Sesshomaru murmured , moving away from the woman who  had her hand on her collar, her fingers  starting to fidget with the buttons. 

“Right…”

Her hand went to the back of her head , awkwardly trying to make herself look normal. She then mounted up and urged Tenseiga to follow behind , her eyes fixated on Sesshomaru’s back. 

Again; they started something only for him to end it again.

They were moving at a snail ’ s pace, and she wasn’t keen on continuing at this ra te. Sesshomaru, on the other hand, seemed  content to carry on the way they were. She wondered what she would have to do to up the ante. Or, would it only push him further away? Either way, she really wasn’t going to know unless she tried something.


	11. Snow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello all!
> 
> I am very aware that I missed the last two weeks of updates and I am so sorry about that! It was a combination of work got away from me and I realized I'd written myself into a bit of a corner. I do read and take your feedback in and adjust, so thank you so much for those that give it! But because of that the story has changed (for the better) and I had written myself into a corner and needed to figure my way out of it. Which I did (hopefully)! And now, back to our regularly scheduled uploads (hopefully).

Rin hummed quietly, stretching in an empty bed while she heard her husband shuffling about and getting ready for the day. She glanced to him, watching him pull his hair into a low ponytail and fasten it with a red cord. For the few weeks since their ride the demon had been busy with work, up early and back late. She tried to spend more time with him, but found herself sleeping before he was done and he was up well before her. Today he’d accidentally woken her, not that she minded much. She’d probably turn over and go back to sleep once he was done dressing anyhow. 

The young woman heard the demon walk over to the curtains to pull them open, where he paused before leaving her alone with the curtains open and the light billowing around her. Blinking at the brightness, she groaned, forcing her stiff body out of bed. Throwing off the blankets, Rin felt a slight chill on her legs. Shivering, she was reminded why she hated early mornings. Not that her mornings were particularly early compared to her husband, but she was someone who never said no to a long lazy lie-in. Today there was nothing on the agenda for the two of them, and she happily took the opportunities to relax in her new home. 

Wrapping her body in a warm robe, Rin moved over to the fireplace, wondering what her husband might think of her starting a fire so early in the day. Closing her eyes did not help block out the blinding light, so she was forced to sit there, debating between getting up for the sake of getting up, getting up for the sake of being lazy, or rolling over and being lazy. 

Groaning, she approached the window, her hands gripping the curtains but not before she peeked out at the whitening landscape. 

Snow. 

It was snowing. 

She couldn’t help the smile that fell on her face at the sight of the thick, fat, flakes. One of her biggest worries was that she might not get to see snow in her new home. Her father had assured her that it did indeed snow where she was to live, that they had all the seasons as they did, but she felt quite stupid to be a grown woman and ask someone about the weather conditions. There wasn’t much now, and some of the grass and ground was still peeking through, but it was signaling the start of colder weather. 

And now she was seeing it snow. 

Her heart beat a little faster in the excitement, her lips pulling into a smile as she all but ran to her closet to pull out some of her warmer dresses and boots. The dress she slipped on was a deep burgundy, fitting for the season, at least, as far as her limited sense of style told her. Tying her hair up in a quick side ponytail, Rin moved down the stairs towards the back of the house, slipping on her fur-lined boots and out into the freshly fallen snow. There were only a few centimeters at most, but the fact that it was staying on the ground made her all the more excited. 

Rin looked up to the falling flakes, her fingers extending to catch one, her eyes watching as it vanished. 

She had always loved winter, enjoying the tracks she made in the snow, loving how warmer and calmer everything inside seemed to become. Walks were more enjoyable, though her brothers would tease that it was because she could find her way back, Rin knew it was because of the atmosphere that enveloped her. 

As a child, she was lucky enough to spend many hours out playing, her father and brothers engaging in snowball fights and designing “structurally superior walls” as her father put it. 

Would she have as much fun with a child of her own? The winters here were milder after all… 

She paused at the thought of her having a child, of being a mother. Unconsciously, she glanced down to her stomach, biting her lip. 

They never talked about children, and for that Rin was somewhat grateful. The problem was was that the world was going to be looking to them to have children. Would she be accused of being barren? Or would he be accused of being infertile? What hurt the most was that she wanted to be a mother. 

“You should have on a coat.” 

Rin turned to look at her husband, the demon standing in the doorway, his feet carefully avoiding the freshly fallen snow and fur draped over his arm. 

“You’ll fall ill if you stay out here like that,” Sesshomaru continued, holding out the sleeves of an ivory wool coat that was much too big for her. 

“It was only for a moment or two,” Rin said, slipping into the sleeves all the same, “and it’s not that cold either.” 

“If you’re going to stay out longer, I’ll have Kaede bring out your things,” Sesshomaru told her. 

“Oh! No; I’ll go up and get them!” 

Rin slowly took off her boots and walked upstairs, leaving the demon standing beside the open doors. Silently, he turned to look outside, his expression softening at the sight of the mountains of fresh snow and the tracks that were now being hidden by the falling flakes. 

It seemed they actually had more in common than he first thought. 

Winter was his favorite season, if not the most beautiful. He found himself reminiscing about his youth, playing hide and seek with his father, sitting in front of a fire, letting the glow warm him while the weather around him attempted to chill his bones. t of a fire, letting the glow warm him while the weather around him attempted to chill his one thing wouldn'He supposed his winters were much milder compared to hers; he’d never gone North for the winter given how bad the roads got, but he always heard stories about how the snow could get up to his hips or how the wind could get so bad any skin would be frost bitten inside of ten minutes. Nevertheless, it was somewhat comforting to know that she seemed to enjoy the season as much as he. 

He slowly shut the door, keeping the chill outside where it belonged. 

Snow early in the year was not unusual, but it did give him a chance to think on the year past. They’d been married for half a year now, and she seemed to adjust well. People down here adored her, and she was a delight at lunches and parties, though Sesshomaru could see it was only a face she put on for others. She loved to talk, and would do nothing but if given the opportunity, which was odd for him as he preferred silence. 

Sesshomaru closed his eyes, rubbing his brow in hopes that it would abate his growing headache.

He was exhausted. 

The demon lay down on the couch and closed his eyes, hoping Jaken was busy enough that he wouldn’t come looking for his boss. Sesshomaru was working himself harder and harder, a part of him wanting to lock himself away and ignore every little problem starting to grow bigger and fester worse. But a bigger part of him knew that wasn’t the solution and all this was doing was making every little thing worse. 

Sesshomaru opened his heavy lids at the sound of the slamming door. He sat up a little at this, to see Rin dusting snow off her hair and stamping her boots. When had she gone outside? Had he really slept that much and that deeply. 

“Brr… it’s cold out there,” Rin laughed, turning to her husband on the couch, “snowing worse now…” 

“Hmm…” Sesshomaru looked out the window. 

“Did you take a nap?” 

Sesshomaru peeked up at her, the young woman taking off her coat and boots. 

“A bit,” Sesshomaru murmured, closing his eyes again and relaxing into the cushions. 

She walked around the room, rubbing her hands together and breathing into the red fingers. Her feet were in stockings, and he could see them peeking under her dress when she walked around. 

“If you’re cold, you can call someone over to start a fire.” 

Rin paused, looking down at the demon who was now looking up at her. He was still resting on the couch with his hands on his stomach. 

“I could…” 

She came to sit on the side of the couch, her eyes looking him over with a small smile on her lips. 

“Or… you could warm me up…” 

The demon froze as Rin slipped her fingers into his button-up and running the cold digits over his side. Her eyes flickered down to his body for a moment before back to his face, a cheeky grin on her face and her tongue flickered over her lips. 

Sesshomaru sat up a little more at this. Rin started to crawl over him. Sesshomaru watched as her dress was slowly sliding off her shoulders, revealing bare skin that her hair fell over. He didn’t pull away as she leaned closer to him, her lips gently brushing against his. His hand came to the back of her neck, pressing her closer while her other hand came to his chest. The demon moved to run his teeth over her neck, Rin releasing a deep sigh at the feeling. Long fingers gently tugged at the top of her dress, encouraging it further down. 

“Sesshomaru?” 

The demon jerked awake at his name, the young woman in his dream standing over him, her eyes watching him. 

“You fell asleep,” she teased quietly, “too much work?” 

Sesshomaru found himself breathing a little harder than normal. It was embarrassing; how old was he? 

“A little,” Sesshomaru murmured, sitting up, hoping he sounded normal. 

“I’m going for a walk,” she said, “do you want to join me?” 

He looked her up and down, his wife now dressed in her winter boots and coat. The red wool was surrounded by white fur and her hands were covered in tan mitts that matched her boots. What he needed to do was take some time away from her to calm himself down and refocus. 

“Alright.” 

Rin smiled wider at this. She waited patiently for him to slip on the ivory coat and his own boots. He found her sitting on the couch, hands in her lap and her eyes turned out to the window. Rin stepped in time with him out the door, her walking quickly beside him to keep up. He caught a glimpse at the footprints in the snow, finding two sets for his one. Slowing, the demon let her hand cover his, his fingers curling around hers. 

“Does it snow a lot down here?” 

“Not as much as you’re used too,” Sesshomaru said, “but yes.” 

“Oh that’s good,” Rin breathed a sigh or relief, “I was worried there wouldn’t be anything down here…” 

“Like the wildlife?” 

“Yeah,” the young woman nodded, “guess this place isn’t so different from my home… is it?” 

“I suppose not. Is that a good thing?” 

“Home always is.” 

They walked in silence for a few more moments, Rin taking the opportunity to step closer to him. Maybe she was using the cold as excuse, but the demon did not want to push her away regardless. Despite his demeanor, he liked having her close. Carefully, he put his hand over hers, feeling grateful that she didn’t pull away. 

“What do you like about winter?” Sesshomaru decided to ask her, looking at the snow falling through the trees. 

“I don’t know,” Rin admitted, “I guess… it’s how peaceful everything is.” 

“Odd, given that you enjoy talking.” 

“I guess it is,” she laughed, “but when it snows, it’s just so quiet and relaxing… I just don’t feel the need to fill the silence.” 

“Why do you feel the need?” 

Rin paused at this, and the demon could practically her hear her heart skip a beat. 

“Does… it—” 

“It doesn’t bother me,” Sesshomaru said, “it’s different and new, but doesn’t bother me.” 

“Oh,” Rin smiled in relief at that idea, “well… I guess because my house was always loud and noisy… though it wasn’t always a good thing.” 

“No?” 

“There were fights… loud fights,” she side-eyed Sesshomaru, “you’ve met my father; he’s a military man through and through. Disobedience wasn’t something he liked in our house.” 

“I can imagine,” Sesshomaru said, remembering how their trips to Rin’s house would sometimes be cut short by her father needing to discipline one of his sons, “being in a quiet home must be odd for you then.” 

“Different, and new, but not bad,” Rin smiled up at him. 

As if bringing up the topic itself brought it to fruition, the two lapsed into an almost silence, their feet crunching on the dead leaves and snow. Rin was looking around, taking in the trees, once bare and haunting, were now holding bundles of snow. It made her wonder what would happen when the snow would fall heavily. 

“Rin…” 

She turned to look up at him with big brown eyes that made him need to take a moment. Since they were children, she’d always had those dark eyes that seemed to sparkle when she smiled and laughed. While she didn’t do much of that now, he could see the brightness was still there, and knowing it made him worry a little less. 

“I’m afraid I have to head back,” Sesshomaru said, “Jaken will come looking for me in a few minutes.” 

“Alright,” Rin conceded with a small sigh, “it’s getting cold anyway…” 

“I’ll have Kaede make something warm for you when you get back,” the demon gently pulled her back to the house. 

“That’s alright!” Rin said, “just a few minutes in front of the fire and I’ll be fine!” 

The demon hummed in response, still making an effort to have someone fetch Kaede once they entered in the house. Their coats and boots were taken and changed by the staff, and the demon left Rin to be taken care of by her personal maid. Instead, he made his way up to his office, sending Jaken away for more time to himself to just think. 

He hated his dream. 

Hated how much he wanted it to come true. 

She wasn’t exactly turning him away, the opposite in fact. But he just couldn’t bring himself to do it. He could see how the rejection was affecting her, and little moments of joy weren’t enough to make her forgive him. But what if he hurt her? Took every one of those notions she had about love and destroyed them with his bare hands. She’d already given up so much for her family, to have her ideals crushed was too much to ask of her. Besides, she’d already told him to give up on her ever loving him. 

He mulled his dream at his desk, hand to his head and breathing steady and low. Determined to take his mind off of everything, he reached for his mail, digging through the multiple letters from associates and clients, stopping when he came upon a green envelope. 

Curiosity piqued, he turned it over eyebrows raising at the sight of the return address of an old family. Ripping open the letter, he pulled out a rather beautifully painted Christmas card, filled with a long letter explaining that the couple were getting an early start due to their travel plans, what they hoped for the coming year, and other cheerful thoughts. 

Folding it back down, Sesshomaru felt another flip in his stomach. 

The holidays were coming up. 

As per usual, he would be all but forced by his father to take a break from work for Christmas and New Year’s. He would be dragged back to his family home, listening to his brother and father prattle on and on about family and compassion and resolutions— 

And this time he’d have a wife. 

Sesshomaru looked back to the letter, wondering about the upcoming time. 

He knew some traditions varied from family to family, and region to region, but he had no idea just how varied their customs were. She would most likely want to spend time with her own family, given how far they were from her, but the travel would be long and exhausting, especially in the snow that was sure to greet them as they traveled towards the mountains. That didn’t mean impossible though. 

“Sesshomaru?” 

The demon turned to the young woman, Rin at the door and peeking her head in.. 

“Kaede sent up some tea,” she said, slipping into the room, “to warm up!” 

“Thank you,” he murmured, watching Rin make him his cup before fixing hers. 

“May I join you?” 

Sesshomaru accepted his cup from her, noticing how she was getting more and more bold around him, a trait he was not inclined to discourage. 

“If you wish.” 

Smiling, Rin sat in one of the chairs he kept off to the side, both of her hands around the her cup of tea and she kept glancing out the window. 

“I’m surprised you didn’t ask for Hot Cocoa.” 

Rin paused at his comment, looking up to her husband. 

“Because I wanted to join you for a bit,” Rin admitted, “and… well, you don’t like sweet things… do you?” 

The demon paused at her response. He glanced down to his tea; he supposed he shouldn’t be surprised, given how she was picking up on his idiosyncrasies like how he liked his tea and what he liked to eat. She sat with him in silence for a little longer as they drank their tea. 

“If you’re done, I can take your cup with me,” Rin said once she finished. 

“Leave the tray; I’ll have Jaken send it back down.” 

“Sure,” the young woman seemed uncertain now. She had come to stand by the door, her hand on the doorknob, “I’m going to head back, unless… did you need something?” Rin asked, her distance from the demon making him more irritated than he ever thought. 

“Yes, actually; the holiday seasons are coming up,” he informed her, his fingers passing her the card he had just received, “this is from the Yamamoto’s; they’re-” 

“A family with a long history in fur trading yes?” she finished for him, flipping through the long letter. 

“That is correct,” Sesshomaru nodded, “but it did get me thinking of what our future plans were.” 

Rin froze at the comment. Trying to maintain her composure, she swallowed thickly, her head lifting to meet his eyes. 

“My father traditionally invites the entire family over to the winter home for about a week,” the demon continued, “that includes myself and now you, my wife.” 

Rin seemed somewhat saddened by the news, her hands beginning to fidget as it normally did when she was anxious. 

“Is something wrong?” 

“No!” Rin defended, faltering for a moment, “I just… it’s going to be hard… not to have my father around… or my brothers.” 

“We could always go down and—” 

“The roads are too bad,” Rin said sadly, “if it’s snowing now… I can only imagine how it’s going to be come Christmas.” 

“Doesn’t mean impossible.” 

Sesshomaru watched her relax a little at this. It was apparent she was torn, and wanted to do both. 

“It’s your family tradition—" 

“What about when the weather is warmer?” 

At once her fidgeting stopped. Rin finally met his eyes, a smile tugging at the corners of her mouth. 

“My father would be happy to have you join us,” Sesshomaru said, “but if you want to visit your family this winter we could,” he took in a deep breath, “or, we can always go see them in the spring. The decision is yours.” 

“I… what do you want to do?” 

“I’m not partial to either,” Sesshomaru murmured. 

“Then… let’s spend the holidays with your family,” Rin decided, “and… maybe… when the weather’s better—” 

“We can go see your father then,” the demon assured her, coming to stand in front of her. 

“Yeah?” Rin asked, “you’d take the time off work?” 

“Of course.” 

She smiled at him a little more at this. 

“Okay…” she agreed, “I’ll let me father know… and I need to figure out what to send him for the holidays…” Rin stepped up to him, planting a gentle kiss on his cheek, “thank you.” 

Sesshomaru watched her leave, Rin turning back to smile at him before she left him alone. Sighing, the demon walked back over to his desk, pulling his top drawer open and ran his fingers over the letter he’d received from her before they’d gotten married. The contents were a drastic change from the woman who was bringing him tea and inviting him on walks and smiling at him. She wasn’t the type to play with people, and she didn’t seem to be after anything from him, so what was she doing? He groaned, and peeked at the letter; he wanted to think this Rin was real, but the writing was in her hand. So what was he to believe? 


	12. Rumors

The large gala was filled with mingling  people and happily dancing couples. Wine was being drunk by bottles and people were busy laughing and wishing everybody else a Happy Holidays. Sesshomaru and Rin were among them,  returning the wishes and shaking hands. Music was jovial and upbeat, what seemed to be an entire orchestra  had been hired to serenade the people , their instruments polished and shining in the chandelier’s light.

Sesshomaru and Rin had more than a few Christmas events to attend ,  which meant more people for her to smile at  and more  colleagues for him to  mingle with. Rin enjoyed the people, but found that she didn’t have time to meet with her closer friends , and she missed  everyone.  Sesshomaru assured her that she’d see InuYasha and Kagome in a few short weeks during Christmas , and she’d also get to see his father and step-mother. Until the n,  they were stuck with  each other, their servants, and people that pretended to know them.

“You look lovely,” Sesshomaru murmured,  looking over her  burnt orange dress with the  dark topaz earrings and necklace.

“Thank you,” Rin said accepting a glass of whatever was passed to her , her fingers running over the earrings, “you have good taste. Where do you get—”

“ I have a personal jeweler,” the demon said, “ he makes custom pieces for me.”

“Aren’t those… expensive?”

“Of course,” the demon said , sipping his wine.

“ Lord  Sesshomaru!”

The demon groaned at the sound of the exuberant voice.

“Naraku,” Sesshomaru turned to look  at the half- demon approached the two of them, “what can I do for you?”

“I was wondering if I might steal your beautiful wife for a dance?” Naraku smiled, looking from one to the other.

“I’m afraid we’re busy ,” Sesshomaru said.

“ I wasn’t asking  _ you _ ,” Naraku emphasized, “I was asking about  _ her _ .”

Rin felt the  tension in the room rise, and she looked from her husband to Naraku.

“I’m going to get another drink,” Rin quietly interrupted, reaching up to give  Sesshomaru a kiss on the cheek, “ excuse me.”

“So that’s a no then?”

“Another time, my Lord,” she curtseyed to Naraku before she turned to leave.

“Isn’t she just so good?” Naraku commented, watching her go, “ a perfect picture of a Lady in every way.”

Sesshomaru looked for a way  out , but found the half-demon deliberately blocking every way he could leave.

“No child yet?”

Sesshomaru stiffened at the words, knowing exactly what game Naraku was trying to play.

“ I’m afraid not,” Sesshomaru looked to his glass of wine .

“Shame ,” Naraku said, “ well… if you two keep at it, I’m sure she’ll have a child  in… oh… five years or so…”

Sesshomaru’s eyes darkened and his brows narrowed .

“Careful Naraku,” Sesshomaru hissed, “you’re pushing your luck.”

“Luck has nothing to  do with it,” the half-demon chuckled, “ I’m just wondering whether you’re sterile or she’s barren.”

The demon put the wine glass on a passing tray, lest he break in in his hand.

“See, this is why you’re so much more  _ fun _ than your brother,” Naraku chuckled, “InuYasha would’ve just lashed out at me for that but  _ you _ ,” he paused,  his lips curled into a devilish smile, “you’re plotting something… I can see it.”

“ You ’re not worth ruining my reputation,” Sesshomaru said, “ nor are you worth my time.”

“But you’re worth mine…”

Sesshomaru growled, his body tensing.

“I’ll destroy you… one way or another, I’ll send you back to that worthless hole you dragged yourself out of.”

“So scary,” Naraku mocked, “think I felt a chill in the air on that one.”

The half-demon  walked away from Sesshomaru, a large grin on his face and a nod given to Rin as she returned to her husband.

“ I take it I missed something?” Rin asked.

“You don’t want to know,” Sesshomaru whispered , “has anyone been hassling you lately?”

“About anything in particular?”

“Pick something.”

“I’m still considered new,” Rin said, “there’s always rumors about me, but nothing  that’s a concern,” she added after noticing his face.

“If you’re sure ...”

“I am,” she slipped her arm around his .

Sesshomaru  stepped in time with her, wondering if she was hiding anything from him to make him happy.

Their walk was interrupted by an elderly demon. He was a newcomer, though he was very much dressed in the styles of the time.

“Forgive me,” the old demon bowed to Rin, “you’re  Commander Takeo ’s daughter, are you not?”

“I am,” Rin cur tseyed to him, “you know my father?”

“We go way back,”  he laughed, “old bastard’s still hanging on?”

“Despite his best efforts to drive himself to the grave , yes he is,” Rin said with a smile, “he’s not here, I’m afraid— ”

“That’s alright,” he  smiled, “I came to see you, and give my congratulations to the couple,” he looked to Sesshomaru, “and to thank you for bringing  the North  to the West .”

“Thank you,” Sesshomaru shook his hand, “I’m sorry; I’m afraid we haven’t been introduced.”

“Ah! Forgive me,” the man said, bowing low, “I am  Kaito Yamamoto.  I hail from the Northern regions , like your beautiful bride,” he stood, “ it is an honour to meet you, Lord Sesshomaru Takahashi.”

“A pleasure to meet you too,” Sesshomaru nodded .

“Excuse me,” Rin said, noticing she was being called over, “I’ll leave you two to your conversation,” she bowed to  Kaito, “a pleasure to meet you, my lord.”

Kaito bowed back, watching her walk around the crowds to meet up with some of the other women.

“I was wondering how the business arrangement was going,” the demon stood beside Sesshomaru, “and if it seemed like it could be fruitful for others...”

“You wouldn’t be trying  to use my father and our business as a litmus test, would you?” Sesshomaru asked, watching Rin mingle with the other women .

“I wouldn’t dream of it,”  Kaito held his head high, “ especially with how well you and your father treat more loyal and honest businessmen.”

“Get to the point,” Sesshomaru said, sipping his  cognac.

“Keep us updated on the business , and if it’s going well... maybe let me and mine have a day’s head start. ”

Sesshomaru side-eyed the elderly demon.  It wasn’t  the first person who came to them with this idea, but after a few months the offers were starting to become more and more  serious. But Rin’s father was another story.

“Takeo ’s—”

“A tough old codger who would rather eat dirt than deal with politics, I know,” his elder chuckled,  “I know him well.”

“You friends?”

“Hardly call it that,”  Kaito said, “but I respect him, and he respects me , which is more than most have.”

“More than I have,” Sesshomaru commented, watching Rin laugh  at another’s joke.

“I doubt that.”

Sesshomaru glanced to the old demon, him watching to the other men and women milling on the dancefloor .

“He’s a hard-ass, but he’s like that with everyone . Don’t take it personally.”

“Oh?”

“He let you take his daughter away,” he  gestured with his glass to Rin, “that says something. It’s probably the reason so many of Northern businesses are starting to come down to sniff around. You might be our gateway North.”

Sesshomaru huffed at this.  They weren’t the first people  to work with Northern businessmen, but they were never overly fruitful ventures. With technology improving the way it was, however, it seemed like that was due to change , and it seemed like he and his father got lucky  with their timing. 

“Rin.”

“ Hm ?”

He gently took her hand.

“Come here.”

“ Huh?”

She let herself be led to the dancefloor, Sesshomaru spinning her and bringing her in close. Confused, Rin felt her  fingers slip into his and his hand slid over her back. Instinctively, she moved her hand up his arm, a smile tugging at her lips as she grew excited  when she realized they were going  to have their first dance.

He moved smoothly with her in his arms, each step in time with the music and the two managed to keep to themselves  on the floor. Sesshomaru was  in control of himself, and yet was incredibly graceful , even with her in his arms.  Rin always loved dancing, but she never  felt like she was the  most co-ordinated person . In Sesshomaru’s arms, however, she felt  like she couldn’t make a single misstep.

Sesshomaru’s eyes never left hers, and  it made her heart quiver . His face wasn’t hardened and serious, but there was a certain softness in his lines that she hadn’t seen before. She didn’t  care if people were looking at  them, she just happy to have him look at her. 

Somehow, she managed to remember her steps and didn’t trip over her  own feet. When the song slowed to a close, the demon walked her off , her eyes never leaving his.

“I thought you said you didn’t know how to dance,” Rin teased.

“I said I don’t—didn’t,” he admitted , “never said I didn’t know how too.”

Rin couldn’t stop the smile on her face and the butterflies in her stomach .

“You’re very good at dancing ,” Rin sai d , “thank you…”

“For dancing with my wife?” Sesshomaru  asked.

“Lord Sesshomaru?”

Any  retort Rin might’ve given was cut off by a man whispering to Sesshomaru.

“Alright,” Sesshomaru said,  nodding to him before turning back to his wife, “I’ll be a moment.”

There, in the middle of the room, with other people  looking on, he kissed her before he left her for his conversation.

Rin smiled  as he walked off with the man ,  her fingers touching  her arm and she slipped off the floor and into the crowd.

“ Bravo.”

The voice was one she didn’t want to hear. Naraku had an amazing way of ruining the night.

“One never sees Lord Sesshomaru on the dancefloor,” Naraku leaned over, “what a little wonder you must be.”

Rin kept quiet, her face turning away from him.

“Come now—”

“Don’t you have better things to do?” Rin suddenly said, “other than trying to burst my bubble?”

“Afraid not ,” he gently took her hand, “may we—”

“No,” Rin pulled her hand back.

“But you’ll dance with Lord Sesshomaru?”

“My husband?” Rin pressed, “yes.”

“Your husband who shows  more compassion to his businessmen then you.”

The young woman bristled at this. She looked to get away , but the half-demon stuck close to her.

“He’s a good man,” Rin finally said.

“A few kisses and a dance  makes up for his icy demeanor?” Naraku hummed,  “if you believe that –”

“Then you have a chance at being king of the world,” Rin said,  “that must make you overjoyed.”

Naraku’s laugh was one of the chillier ones she’d heard.

“The holidays are coming fast,” Naraku casually commented, “which family will you visit?”

“Not yours.”

“My  my ,” the half-demon leaned towards her, “you’ve managed to  inherit some of your husband’s  icier habits,” Naraku hummed, “ won’t you just entertain me for a moment?”

“No.”

A hand touched her arm, Naraku’s fingers closing around  her bicep.

“I wasn’t asking.”

Trying to pull herself away, Rin felt the grip tighten, and Naraku move closer.

“Sesshomaru’s busy—”

“Lord Sesshomaru.”

Naraku pulled back at this, a sneer on his lips.

“You will address my husband as Lord Sesshomaru,” Rin said, “ even around me.”

A muscle in the  half-demon’s jaw twitched. He looked around the room, taking in the chattering people  around them. 

“ _ Lord  _ Sesshomaru,” Naraku practically spat the word, “ is busy with other matters. Perhaps he is getting something to make his performance in the bedroom more … akin to his performance in the boardroom,” he smirked at her discomfort, “or… could it be,” his fingers touched the back of her neck , “that you Northern women are like your landscape… barren?”

He pulled back with a laugh , Rin feeling her heart hammering  after it had dropped into her stomach. 

“I’m only  joking with you my dear,” Naraku laughed , “I know you Northern women  are more fertile than the earth beneath our feet. Why! Just look at your mother— ”

A loud slap echoed through the golden halls. At once the world came to a stop, all eyes on Rin, with her arm  across her  chest and Naraku with a red mark on his cheek .

“You… leave my mother out of your mouth,” Rin hissed,  pearls of tears forming in  the wells of her eyes. 

Without another word she bowed her head and walked away somewhere,  _ anywhere _ , out of the room. She needed air . She needed out of this  boning and lacing. She  needed to  hear something other than blood rushing through her ears and the clicking  of her heels on tile floor.

Cold air hit her face and chilled her skin. Shutting the doors to the balcony behind her , Rin hid herself behind the brick, drawing in deep breaths and letting it come out of her in white puffs. Her hand hit her chest, and the  few tears that dripped down her cheeks stung. She was grateful for the pain; it made her think of something other than her mother.

And the scene she’d just caused.

No matter what  she did she’d backed herself into a corner. She needed to leave, and it wasn’t like she could scale the balcony or quietly slip out through a set of stairs. T here was one way in and one way out ; through the eyes of every party-goer. Never mind what her husband would think—

“Rin?”

She lifted her head to his voice. The demon stood with the balcony door’s handle in his hand. His amber eyes were staring at her , watching her try to catch her breath.

“What happened?” he asked, shutting the door behind him .

Rin  sniffed, grateful she had calmed herself down enough. Her eyes  weren’t red and puffy and she wasn’t  hyperventilating.

“I… um…” she swallowed, “Sesshomaru I’m so sorry—”

“What for?”

It was apparent he hadn’t heard the mutterings and only came looking for her. She felt like a caught child  about to be chastised by her father.

“Naraku…” Rin paused, glancing to  the ballroom, the party seemingly getting back to normal , “ he- he got a rise out of me…”

Sesshomaru’s expression was something she hadn’t seen on him before. It was a mixture of concern and anger. He pulled back  and looked back to the party .

“I… he…” she took a deep breath, and felt tears start ing to build up, “ I lashed out at him and I—”

“You what?”

Now Rin looked away from him, her embarrassment consuming her . She wished he had yelled at her. The cold whisper made the air  around her feel warmer.

“I… I…”

His hand took her wrist and pulled her along, Rin fighting against herself as she didn’t want to  re-enter the party. Sesshomaru spoke to no one as he pulled Rin along and retrieved their coats.  He said nothing to her  during the ride home , and Rin wasn’t  keep on filling the unbearable silence. A part of her worried that if she said anything, he might order her to be silent.

They arrived home  much earlier than anticipated, and their servants seemed surprised  to see them. The conversation Sesshomaru wanted to have was put on hold  when his  assistant suddenly joined them.

“Lord Sesshomaru!” Jaken  ran up to the two of them, “ since you’ve come early,  a document—”

“Leave it—”

“ Sesshomaru.”

Rin  had taken off her coat, and was starting to make her way up the stairs.

“It’s okay,” she said, “you can go fix it.”

“Rin—”

“I’d… I’d like some time to myself,” Rin told him, “please?”

Sesshomaru studied her for a moment , taking in her tired figure and red  skin .

“Alright,” he conceded, turning to Jaken, “where is it.”

She watched him walk awa y, taking a deep breath and starting to make her way up the stairs. He really was impossible to read.

“Welcome back Miss.”

Surprised, Rin  found her maid walking behind her.

“You two are back early,” Kaede commented, taking in Rin’s red cheeks , “it must be cold out,” she pursed her lips, “I’ll run you a hot bath.”

“Oh! No Kaede—”

“Nonsense!”

Rin’s protests  fell on deaf ears, and Kaede marched ahead of the young woman  and into the bathroom. Feeling as though fighting her would be fruitless,  Rin sat herself in front of the  vanity, and pulled off her  jewellery .

The  one night Sesshomaru decided to dance with her was the one night she had to lash out at someone for a passing comment. Now he was going to be treated as a joke, something someone with his pride wouldn’t allow. He would pull away from her, and all her work for the last six months  was for nothing.  She wiped the tear blooming in her eyes, and  started to take off her nicer clothes.

She was just so tired.

“Your bath miss,” Kaede said, “get in before it gets cold.”

“Thank you, Kaede,” Rin smiled as the old woman shut the bathroom door behind her.

Turning back to the mirror,  she dabbed underneath her eyes once more and then took her maid up on her suggestion.

She sighed as she slipped into the bath , feeling the hot water warm her legs and then her body. Resting her back against the large tub and letting her hair float around her. Kaede had put some soapy bubbles in with her, and a few white flower petals. Rin  cupped a hand and lifted out a handful of water with a few petals, letting the water fall between her fingers .

A part of her wanted  nothing more than to go home, to return to that carefree time when she could yell at someone and not ruin her husband’s carefully cultivated reputation. Six months she’d held her tongue and done everything as right as she could and now, because one man  pushed her too far, she’d undone it all.

“Rin; Kaede said you needed me for something—”

Immediately Rin covered her chest as the bathroom door opened. Sesshomaru obviously didn’t expect her to be bathing, and turned away from her naked body.

Rin wanted to drown.

“Um…” Rin  swallowed thickly , “ wh -what did you say?”

“Kaede said you needed me for something,” Sesshomaru said, keeping his eyes elsewhere, “what was it?”

“Uh… I… um…” she didn’t know what to say; she hadn’t asked Kaede to get her husband, but she didn’t want to get the old woman in trouble, “I… forget.”

It was a horrific excuse, but it was the only thing she could come up with in the moment. 

“Alright then.”

“Actually!”

Sesshomaru stopped leaving , and paused with his hand on the doorframe.

“I-I’m sorry… about today,” Rin said again, “ I didn’t mean to embarrass—”

“He said something about your mother, didn’t he?”

Rin hated how astute her husband could be. Biting her lip, she stared at herself in the water’s reflection ,  starting to see her mother’s feature s in her own. Her father always said Rin looked like he r, but now she was seeing more and more of it. She’d only  passed five years ago, but the memory of her still stung.

“Yes…”

The door shut,  Rin expecting to be alone, but to her surprise, she lifted her head to see her husband  leaning against the door, inside the bathroom with her. The demon looked at her calmly , his eyes deliberately meeting hers. Fortunately, there were still a great deal of bubbles on the surface to hide her.

“I shouldn’t have hit him…” Rin said mournfully.

The demon came to rest his back on the bathtub . He sat on the tile floor with one knee up and his  forearm resting on his thigh . Rin leaned on the edge of the bathtub he sat against, his amber eyes glancing to her from over his shoulder.

“No, you shouldn’t have,” Sesshomaru agreed,  “but it’s not like I don’t understand.”

Another pang of guilt hit her. Her worst fear had been realized; she’d gone and embarrassed her husband. She just wanted to fit in, with him.

“Don’t apologize.”

Sesshomaru seemed to know what she was going to say, and cut her off before she could say it  again.

“Naraku pushed you too far,” the demon told her, “ what’s happened has happened , there’s nothing neither one of us can do about it. It’s not like this is the first fight that’s happened in a  party, and it won’t be the last. You’ll be teased about this,” he paused , “but Naraku isn’t exactly  known for his kindness either ,” Sesshomaru looked to her, “ this will blow over by New  Year’s .”

“Are you sure?”

Her wet hair came to rest on his shoulder. Sesshomaru didn’t push her away. Instead, his hand reached up to run his fingers through the  soaked mane.  Gently, he gripped the back of her head, prompting her to look up to him. Slowly, he  brought his lips to hers, Rin accepting  him without hesitation.

“No,” he said, “ but there were others who probably heard your conversation, and most people enjoy you so—”

“Me!?”

He pulled back, finding  surprise on her face.

“Yes,” Sesshomaru said, “everyone I speak too enjoys your company. You won’t be ostracized for this one little misstep ,” his head tilted, “why does it surprise you that  people like you?”

“Well… I’m not from here,” Rin said, “and…  I’m not  _ used  _ to all this… ”

“ You don’t show it.”

His  forehead touched hers, and he brought her in for another kiss.

“Don’t be sorry,” Sesshomaru told her, “ you haven’t embarrassed me—”

“But I—”

“There’s nothing you can do that would embarrass me,” the demon kissed her again , turning his body , his hands gripping either side of the tub .

The young woman  leaned back as Sesshomaru hovered over her, the demon starting to kiss at her jaw .  Rin tilted her  head back to expose her neck to him , Sesshomaru’s lips trailing down her pale column. His hair slipped over his back and floated in the water , and the sleeves of his shirt were slowly growing soaked .

“ Don’t think that this has ruined everything ,” Sesshomaru whispered , “it’s a moment, nothing more.”

Sesshomaru continued to kiss and suck at her skin, listening to her quietly  hum at his touch.

The demon pulled back when he reached her collarbone, realizing  the situation the two of them were in. She was naked and wet , and he was moving closer and closer. He lifted his hand to cup her cheek before h is fingers trailed  down her neck , over her  clavicle  and started moving down her chest. Rin didn’t stop him,  and only looked from him to his fingers.

“ Lord Sesshomaru!”

Sesshomaru wondered if Rin would object to him drowning his assistant in the bath.

“What!?” he snapped, turning to look at the door.

“I found the missing page sir!”

Amber eyes squeezed tightly at this. When he opened them, he saw  Rin smiling apologetically at him. 

“I’ll be a moment,” Sesshomaru told her, lifting up to kiss her on the forehead before he left her alone.

Jaken was more demanding than he expected, and when he returned, Rin had already fallen asleep . He sat beside her, his fingers running over her bangs and seeing  her face peaceful.

He was angry at himself for leaving her alone with that monster. Naraku had been skulking around them all night, and Sesshomaru knew the half-demon had his red eyes fixed on Rin. Sesshomaru thought  the would woman would be safe among others.  Because of his foolishness, her reputation might be  in jeopardy. Fortunately, Rin was well-liked , and it wasn’t the first fight Naraku had gotten into, so  he suspected she wouldn’t suffer because of this.

But the honeymoon period  for her was ending. More rumors would start circulating and people would start to turn on her for smaller  indiscretions, and he couldn’t protect her from everything.  She could and would do everything right,  but there would still be those who would try and wind her up just to see her snap. Even those who had been born and raised in this society would  succumb to those people.

The demon kissed her  cheek,  grateful that the next few weeks would just be with family. A family that wouldn’t judge her . If anything, her slapping Naraku wold make them like her even more. But he understood her fears; he rubbed his thumb over her cheekbones . She worked so hard for him…

“ Hm …”

This was the first time he’d accidentally woke her. Rin stirred gently , her big brown eyes opening to look up to him.

“Sorry,” Sesshomaru murmured, “ I didn’t mean to wake you.”

“It’s okay,” Rin whispered , “um,” she swallowed thickly, “when… when is our next—"

“New Year’s,” Sesshomaru said,  taking her hand in hi s.

She  watched him run his thumb over the back of her hand before he brought her hand to his lips.

“Thank you,” Rin said, “for the dance tonight…”

“ You  danced beautifully ,” Sesshomaru said , “ that is what everyone will remember tonight.”

“Only because I danced with you,” she grinned, “ you really are very good.”

He  let her hand rest on the mattress , Rin rolling over on her back to look up at him.

“Only because of my partner.”

Rin smiled at his comment, seeing his face soften like it did  during their dance made her heart flutter again. She felt like she could forget  the embarrassment she’d caused them and go back to being  on the dance floor with him . A dance and a few kisses might not change the demon, she knew that, but a part of her was grateful that the  number of times he was pushing her away was shrinking . Her hand covered his, and he remained  where he was for her. It made her wonder what this Sesshomaru would have done if Jaken hadn’t knocked on the  door.


	13. Back for the Holidays

Brown eyes looked out the carriage window, her gloved hand pulling the thick fur tighter around her.

The winters were nothing compared to what she was used too in the  North, but that didn’t mean it was mild in any sense of the word. Snow s till blanketed the countryside, and air still came out of her in white puffs, but it still wasn’t the same. She missed the mountains becoming capped with  snow, missed the warm ciders people would make in large  batches to serve the entire people, missed the snow people she’d make, missed the forts and snowball fights with her brothers.

Missed her family all gathered for the holidays.

It made sense, she supposed, for her  to spend the Christmas holidays with her husband’s new family. She knew her  father-in-law was a kind man, and he seemed more than excited for the new couple to visit. She knew she was to meet her brother-in-law again and the demon’s stepmother,  though she was still uncertain how she would be received. The demon didn’t seem to hold  her on in high reg ard, which worried her somewhat.

What if  the woman w ouldn’t like her by association?

Rin turned to the demon beside her,  he also looking out the window, his usual unreadable expression on his face. She wished he could be  a little more open with her, tell her what he was thinking or wear it on his face.

“What is it?”

The demon’s timing was nothing short of impeccable.

“Nothing,” Rin hummed, “just… haven’t met your family all together in one place is all.”

Amber eyes turned to her, his  orbs glancing to her before he mulled over the answer.

“You’ve already met my father and half-brother and Kagome , ” Sesshomaru started, “ then there’s my stepmother Izayoi . They are the only ones who are coming .”

“That’s it?” Rin asked.

“We have a large extended family,” Sesshomaru said, “ but when it comes to these sorts of events, father likes to keep  it just to immediate family .”

Rin studied the demon for a few moments. Though she didn’t expect him to suddenly become jolly, he seemed to sour more and more as the ir vacation approached. It made her wonder why; she knew he and his brother didn’t get along, but she suspected there was something more to it.

Snow crunched underfoot as Rin stepped to the ground, the demon’s hand guiding her all the way. Fur coat tight around her body and deep red dress trailing behind her, the young woman started to make her way to the front door, husband beside her the whole time. Sesshomaru lifted his arm to slam against the beautiful white door, the gold doorknockers rattling with each knock.

"Yes?"

The man that opened the door was an old demon, his ears pointed, his beard wiry and past his chin, the hair on the top of his head having all but vanished, the only grey around the side of his head. His body was hunched over, and he seemed quite thin.

“Ah! Welcome back, Lord Sesshomaru,” the old man nodded to the couple, shutting the door behind the two of them.

“ Totosai,” the demon commented, nodding to the other, “you’re still around I see.”

“Can’t get rid of me that easily,” the old demon laughed, “I’m a hard bastard to kill.”

“I don’t recall anyone ever attempting such a thing,” Sesshomaru murmured, Rin looking thoroughly confused between them.

“My Lady,” the old demon bowed low to her, “we’ve heard much about  you. It is an honor to meet you.”

“Thank you,” Rin curtseyed, “it’s nice to meet you too.”

“Shall I show you up to your room?” Totosai  asked, looking from one to the other.

“I remember where it  is,” the young lord brushed him off,  encouraging Rin up the stairs, “send our luggage up.”

“Of course,” he nodded, smiling to Rin before he bent over to gather up the suitcases. 

Rin followed her husband, Sesshomaru pulling her along before she could offer to help the old demon. Sesshomaru took her down hallways carpeted wit h a deep green, which was a stark contrast to the paler wood, and gave the whole house a lighter feel. The paintings along the walls were of the demon’s family members, likely long since passed. His door was of the same  wood, and Sesshomaru held the door open for her.

The young woman froze at the sight of a beautiful room complete with a four-poster bed in the room , thick navy curtains with gold cord , and beautiful dark wood furniture with shined gold handles and knobs.

“You grew up  _ here _ ?”

“ No ,” Sesshomaru commented, undoing the buttons on his sleeves, “I was sent to boarding schools and lived with my mother more often  than with my father. But this is our winter home .”

“ Oh, ” Rin wanted to kick herself ;  of course it was his winter home, he’d told her that, “um… where  was your boarding school?”

“Why do you ask?” the demon questioned, pulling open the curtains to reveal a spacious landscape not unlike the one on their property.

“Well… I don’t really know that much about your past,” Rin explained, coming to sit on the four-poster bed , “aside from the fact that you and your father have a summer home in the North… and would stop by to visit us.”

“As I said, I was raised in boarding schools until I became of age, I have one younger half-brother, my parents separated when I was—”

“I mean,” the young woman cut him off, “things that you couldn’t get from idle gossip.”

Sesshomaru’s brow lifted at the comment.

“Such as?”

“Well,” Rin mused, “like… have you broken any bones?”

Sesshomaru’s brow rose at this. He turned to face her, hands in his pockets.

“I’m not one to play games—”

“But it’s the holidays,” the young woman pointed out, feeling the need to find the positive side lest she be driven insane, “that’s the time  _ to  _ play games , ” she paused, “ why don’t you like the holidays? It’s the one time of the year everyone can just breathe.”

Still Sesshomaru remained  stiff.

“ I don’t much like playing games,” Sesshomaru admitted, “and I don’t much like coming home for the holidays.”

“Why not?”

Her husband paused, then turned to face her while leaning on the window sil l.

“As I said, I spent most of my time between my mother’s place and boarding schools,” Sesshomaru told her, “any time I got with my father was rarely time alone ; it was always overshadowed by  my brother and stepmother.”

“Or me… and my father…”

“No.”

Surprised,  Rin watched him draw a deep breath before pressing on.

“You and your family never distracted my father from me. If anything, your father treated me as a young lord . I was al most always guaranteed a week with him alone anyhow after it was all said and done,” he crossed his arms over his chest, “besides, my father enjoyed doting on you.”

“Me!?”

“I think he’s always wanted a daughter,” Sesshomaru explained, “ he greatly enjoys being a fathe r ; if it were up to him, I’d have  a hundred brothers and sisters.”

“Your poor mother and step-mother…”

“Fortunately, my father also respects what his partners want ,” the demon said, “regardless,  you never got to see my father every day, and  then hoard his attention on the holidays.”

Rin’s  response was cut off by  Totosai walking in with their bags. While she tried to help him, her husband beat her too it.

“You should head downstairs,” Sesshomaru said, “I’ll instruct Totosai where to put everything.”

“If you’re sure…”

“My family is dying to  see you again ,” the demon reminded her, “more so than see me.”

“I’m sure they’re—”

“Trust me, it’s you they want to see.”

She  kissed him on the cheek before she made her way down the stairs . She looked at the many paintings and portraits on the wall, all regal demons staring down at her  over their noses. She listen ed to  the sound of voices to guide her towards the rest of the family , though she was so distracted by the paintings  she almost walked into her father-in-law as a result.

“Oh!”

InuTaisho smiled down at her , clearly not surprised as she was.

“Rin,” InuTaisho welcomed her with open arms, “ how are you ?”

“Well, thank you,” she nodded happily, grateful for the hug, “and yourself?”

“Better surrounded by family,” he smiled warmly, “come, let me introduce you.”

Rin felt comfortable walking beside the patriarch of the family, smiling as she talked to him about what he’d missed in her fall and early winter. 

InuTaisho led her into a warm room, with bright sun streaming through the windows and washing the brown leather and cream-colored walls. The furniture was a rich mahogany and all the people in the room seemed buzzing with excitement.

She only noticed that Sesshomaru had appeared when he silently slipped in behind her. He seemed not to want to have the attention on him , as he barely said anything when he walked over to Totosai.

"Izayoi!"

The eldest woman looked up at the sound of her name, standing at the sight of the other two.

She was tall and her hair was impressively long. Even tied in a half-ponytail it nearly went to her legs. Her dress was a royal blue with pink accents, and her make-up was immaculate and her face seemed as youthful as Rin's.  She was surrounded by her son, InuYasha, and Kagome.  All three were in the midst of talking excitedly  until they stopped for Rin.

“Rin, this is my wife, Izayoi,” InuTaisho started calmly, his hand presenting his wife who in turn stood at her introduction.

“Pleasure to meet you,” the woman smiled warmly, her hands bringing Rin in for a hug .

“And you,” Rin nodded, feeling slightly awkward at the suddenness, but enjoying it all the same.

“Now, let’s have a look at you,” Izayoi started, looking up and down Rin’s slender frame as they parted from the hug. “ I’m afraid your descriptions don’t do her justice dear,” the woman breathed, her hands coming to rest on Rin’s upper arms, “she’s absolutely beautiful.”

Rin flushed at the prais e she was receiving,  her smile unconscious and widening as the elder woman’s did.

“Even more gorgeous when you smile,” the woman encouraged, “Sesshomaru is a lucky man.” 

"Thank you," Rin repeated, glancing to the demon that was watching the two of them interact.

"And speaking of," Izayoi started, moving to the other, "how are you, Sesshomaru?"

"Well, thank you," Rin felt like her husband was talking to another businessman instead of his stepmother.

No; Sesshomaru would be more charismatic with them.

"And yourself?"

"Well," Izayoi seemed to become calmer and moved from happy to polite, "thank you."

“And  you’ve already met  InuYasha ,” he continued, gesturing to the young man with the dog ears atop his head, “and  Kagome .”

“ Hello again ,” Rin bowed, Kagome smiling happily before she returned the gesture.

“ And you,” the younger  practically laughed, “ nice to see you again.”

“Thank you,” Rin  said, her attention now turning to the half-demon, “and it’s a pleasure to  see you again , InuYasha.”

“Likewise,” he nodded to her , “how  ya been?”

“Alright,” Rin, “yourself?”

Again, Rin was interrupted by a servant who brought her a glass of wine.  She thanked the demon for her glass of wine, glancing to  Sesshomaru who was listening to what his father was whispering in his ear.

Rin was encouraged to sit between Kagome and Izayoi, where she noticed they’d already had more than one glass of wine, and it as apparent InuYasha had had more than a few. No one seemed to mind , however, and Rin figured since it was the holidays and at the very least the brothers were speaking to each other.

“It’s nice, not to have them fighting,” Izayoi whispered quietly, “ I mean… the odd look here and there but…”

“Brothers will be brothers,” the young woman smiled, Kagome looking up to her curiously.

“You have brothers?” she asked.

“Three,” Rin nodded, “my house was never a quiet one.”

“I’ve only got one,” Kagome commented ,  “a lot  younger than me, but a  little annoying.”

“Funny, my brother’s are bigger and older than me but they’re a  _ lot _ annoying,” the elder teased , Kagome leaning closer at the comment.

“What are they like?” she asked eagerly, “your brothers?”

“Well…” Rin started, finger to her chin as she reminisced , “there’s  Akihiro, the eldest. He’s very well-known academically but has never really been the healthiest person; as a boy he was often sick , so he took to reading as an escape. Then there’s  Mas ashi, he’s the middle of the three brothers. He’s  sort of  Akihiro ’s opposite. Big, bulky, and strong. He joined the military same as father did and he’s… a  Lieutenant now I think? I can’t really keep track of the promotions ,” she sucked in a deep breath, “and the youngest is Ken,” she smiled wider, “he was always the funniest of the three. He calls himself the black sheep of the family but he always does things to make others happy first so,” she shrugged, “he’s never been anything but a gentleman to me.”

“You were right,” Izayoi commented, “never a quiet house.”

"But I was also never bored," Rin pointed out, "lots of fun."

"Even the fights?" Kagome interjected.

"Fair point," the other admitted, "but still not boring."

“So who is set to inherit, if you don’t mind my asking,” InuTaisho  asked gently , “you father seemed like he hadn’t decided.”

“I couldn’t say,” Rin answered honestly, “normally it’s the eldest, and with his education and brains he could succeed,” she seemed saddened by the thought, “but he’s always been so sickly, father worries he might not outlast him,” her fingers ran over the cup,  “Masashi would then naturally be next but he has a tendency to be impulsive  and prefers military life to  day-to-day operatio ns. ”

“And what about Ken?”

The young woman looked to InuYasha, her smile somewhat grim.

“ Ken… loves having a good time, and finds the business boring,” she took in a deep breath, “besides, as good a leader as he is, my father and him don’t have a good relationship.”

“Bad blood between relatives,” InuYasha’s amber eyes glanced to his brother, “wonder what that’s like?”

In response, Sesshomaru’s brows narrowed, his father looking ready to step in to intervene .

“Why don’t we go outside!” Izayoi interrupted , “we can take turns on the firing range!”

“Firing range?” Rin asked, following the group out all the same .

“InuTaisho set it up two years ago, when he learned that Kagome liked to shoot arrows,” Izayoi explained , “when he got a gun, we just turned it into  a firing range.”

“Oh…”

“Don’t worry,” Izayoi squeezed her hand, “ you won’t have to shoot anything.”

Rin nodded, keeping close to her elder and walking out into the brisk cold. Their coats were  brought post-haste  by a surprisingly  round demon named  Myoga , wh o spent a moment dithering on about how  the wind was growing. InuTaisho brushed him off gently,  likely trying to diffuse something before both InuYasha or Sesshomaru said something.

Each took three shots at the three  separate targets. Most were pretty good,  some obviously better than others. Sesshomaru looked picture perfect as always,  InuYasha made a good attempt, and even Izayoi  had a go.  Kagome was by far the best shot, beaming from ear to ear as she took a step back to admire her three bulls-eyes . She shot with a practiced confidence and practically danced back to the group. 

“Why not let Rin take a shot?”

The young woman coughed her into her drink , her hand covering her mouth. InuTaisho looked expectantly at her , an encouraging smile on his lips. 

“Pardon?”

Rin looked from one to the other, her cheeks a light red as she slowly accepted the  gun from Kagome.

“Just take a shot,”  Kagome  suggested helpfully, “ no pressure.”

Rin still looked nervous her drink taken by  the patriarch as he gently patted her  foreword .

“ All in good fun,” he encouraged , patting the young woman gently.

Slowly, the young woman  gripped the weapon tighter, feeling the cold metal on in her hands.

Just a shot; just take a shot and she’d be done. 

In truth she hated guns. Hated seeing them in her father’s house, hated the  shined weapons that were suspended over the mantel of her father’s home, hated the hunting rifle  that her father carried off to join his friends and take down pheasants and deer , and she hated the ceremonial pistols that were encased in glass and treate d as fragile decorative eggs.

The hand that held the  gun trembled , and she could  feel someone telling her something about the recoil, but she could only  hear the heart pounding in her ears. Just a shot, she kept telling herself, just a shot and it’d be all over .

She was very grateful there was nothing but forest behind the three targets, as she would have accidentally hit someone with her shot  going that wide.

Rin lowered the weapon, her ears turning a redder than before and it wasn’t from the cold either. She smiled grimly to Kagome who started to encourage her but then InuYasha started laughing.

“Not even close!” InuYasha laughed, his arm around his sides while Rin flushed  deeper  in embarrassment.

“Why not try again?” InuTaisho encouraged smiling, the young w oman not wanting to meet his eyes .

“ Yeah!” InuYasha continued, giggling, “she might even hit the tree this time.”

Sesshomaru turned to glare at his younger brother,  the half-demon still wheezing despite the  stern look .

“What!?”

“I think you’ve had enough,” Sesshomaru started, eyeing the glass of  wine his brother had.

“Relax,” InuYasha said , “even those of us who’re bad shots—”

“ We’ll let Rin try again,” InuTaisho turned to the brewing fight, “ alright?”

His eldest son glanced to his  brother , the half-demon still in a good mood.

“Tell you what?” InuYasha grinned, “ she hits the bull’s-eye once, and I’ ll  give you  the new horse I just bought.”

“ Bakusaiga ?”

“Yeah, him,” InuYasha nodded, “great horse too. You wanted him didn’t you?”

To this the demon’s eyes narrowed , his father turning to look at them bot h .

“Don’t tell me you bought the horse  to spite your brother!?” InuTaisho interrupted , turning to glare at his youngest.

“He would have!” the half-demon defended, “besides, I didn’t know he  wanted it until after I bought him!”

“The Hell you  didn’t,” Sesshomaru spat, Rin feeling her stomach knot at the anger the demon displayed towards his younger brother.

“InuYasha.”

All  three stopped their bickering at the sound of the timid voice.

“If I hit  two, will you throw in the tackle as well?”

All of them remained quiet at this question, the three sets of amber eyes looking towards her making her feel more than a little nervous. 

“Yeah sure,” he snickered, “ Hell, if you hit three, I’ll hand deliver it all myself!”

“You will?” she asked, “no going back on your word?”

“With my father and brother as witness,” he made a symbol over his heart.

Smiling softly, the young woman  nodded to him before she turned to the target.

This time, her aim was  straight.

_ BANG! _

Her first one hit perfectly in the center.

_ BANG _ _! _

Her second was the same as the first.

_ BANG _ _! _

Her final nearly  went right through Kagome’s  hole.

“Daddy would never let us play with the guns until he was sure we could aim,” Rin told them simply, turning to the group who were currently looking from her to the targets with their mouths open. “I’m a soldier’s daughter,” Rin said, “what? You think I didn’t know how to shoot?”

“B-B-But you’re—”

“A Lady?” Rin finished, “thanks to my mother, yes. But thanks to my father,” she looked down,  “ m y father taught me three things,” she told InuYasha, “ f amily is always first, ” she handed the  rifle back to Kagome, “ it doesn’t matter how many rounds you have if you can’t hit worth a damn,” she stepped back to take her drink, “ and finally, the  most dangerous opponent is the one you underestimate.”

InuYasha was still  speechless as he glanced from her to the targets.

“I’m better with a pistol.”

His ears went droopy at the mention,  eyes wide as he came to look back at her.

“Don’t ever underestimate the opponent InuYasha,” Rin told him with a grin, “as my father would tell you, it is quite easily  the worst mistake you could make, and might  very well  be your last too.”

Feeling slightly proud of herself, Rin stepped back into the house, asking  Myoga for a cup of hot cider to warm her up .

“So, InuYasha,” his brother started, “ when you deliver that horse, I don’t want to see you riding it.”

InuYasha  couldn’t say a word, his eyes still hanging on the door while his father decided to burst out laughing.

Sesshomaru followed his wife ’s scent i nto the drawing room, finding her accepting the warm cup  from the demon. 

“Where did that come out of?”

Rin turned to her husband,  Sesshomaru  leaning against the door, his eyes looking over her.

“I don’t like being made fun of or feeling embarrassed,” Rin answered , “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. ”

“ I would have liked to  have  know n ,” the demon commented , his eyes narrowing.

“I don’t scam people,” the young woman addressed his silent question, “my father would’ve  disowned me if that happened. Besides… Ladies aren’t supposed to know how to shoot… right?”

“True,” Sesshomaru admitted, “ so why’d he teach you?”

“ I wanted to learn, since all my brothers got to do it ,” she smiled at the memory, “my  mother didn’t like when he tried to teach me those things though…” her fingers fiddled with the  cup of warm cider, “she always wanted me to be the perfect lady, upright and pretty and smiling ,” she sucked in a deep breath, “too bad my father had a say … as I got older, I started to hate guns more and more so… I stopped. ”

“Would have thought the daughter of a captain  wouldn’t be opposed to them…”

“I hated how obsessive people got over them,” Rin explained, “I was fine with the loud noises, but it they were things made to kill and my father and his friends just wanted to admire them.  I guess I couldn’t compartmentalize it like my brothers could.”

“You were a very good shot,” Sesshomaru said, “so; what are we going to do with  Bakusaiga ?”

“You tell me,” Rin smiled, “he’s all your yours ,” she paused, “ he sounds like a wonderful animal.”

To this, the demon actually  had to hide his smile, his eyes glancing to his  embarrassed brother.

“He is,” Sesshomaru nodded,  “a rather impressive horse at that,” he murmured, Rin shuffling in his presence.

“Perhaps… we could go riding together with him?”

Sesshomaru looked to the young woman, his expression softening.

“I’m sure he’d like that,” Sesshomaru murmured.

“And you?”

The demon  tilted his head at this.

“Would you like to go for a ride too?” Rin  asked , “with me?”

The demon looked her over,  finding her standing a little straighter and  a little taller. She was still a petite woman ,  and she was still somewhat awkward and innocent, but she was becoming more. Becoming more for him and for her family.

“Of course.”

He pressed his lips to her forehead, feeling her take a step closer to him. As much as he liked to know everything that went on in a person’s head, a growing part of him enjoyed that she wasn’t so obvious to him. He found, for the first time, that coming back with his family wasn’t such a task. If anything, getting to watch her smile and chat with others made the coming days he would be trapped with his brother worth it. 


	14. Christmas morning and night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whew! Thank y'all for your patience! Hope it's worth it ;)

Rin woke on Christmas day to a warm fire in the room and  her husband dressing for the day. Groaning as she stretched,  Rin sat up, sighing as she noticed her messy hair. Patting it down, Sesshomaru stepped up to her, giving her  her brush.

“Good morning,” Rin yawned,  half-wanting to slip back under the covers.

“Good morning,” he said , “how’d you sleep?”

“Well, thank you,” she hummed, “how about you? You seem more restless here.”

“ New environment,” Sesshomaru said casually, “even around family .”

She hummed, 

“When are we expected to go down?” she asked, sitting on the vanity to  apply her creams and oils .

“We are not on a set schedule,” Sesshomaru said, “we can go down when you’re ready.”

“You’re already ready,” Rin murmured quietly, the demon adjusting his clothes at the mention.

“Force of habit.”

He let her take the time to get up and dressed in  an emerald dress with long sleeves and a high collar. She swept her hair up  off her head  and was pinning it up when her husband walked over to her with her present.

“Happy Christmas,” Sesshomaru said quietly, handing her a small box.

“Thank you,” Rin murmured,  accepting the gift .

He waited silently beside her as she slowly opened the  gift.

Rin gasped quietly, looking down at two rings nestled in the velvet cushions . They appeared to be able to lock together , and could be worn as one singular piece of jewelry. One ring was silver, and had a n amethyst  crescent moon in the center with a singular ruby star on the t ip of the moon , while the other was gold and had a  sun set with a yellow diamond set in the center.

“They’re beautiful,” Rin said to the demon  standing beside her.

“I never properly proposed to you.”

She pursed her lips at this.  It was true; any courting or romanticism was taken away from the two of them and Rin never got that sweet bended knee proposal most women dreamed about.  Rin tried not be upset about all of it, knowing how common that was for women like her, but  was still a bitter pill to swallow to hear other women gush about their husbands proposing in romantic parks or after boat rides.

Sesshomaru gently took her left hand and slowly took the two rings, one at a time, and slipped them onto her index finger; first the  moon, then the sun . They fit well, interlocking together. Their bands were small and thin,  neither ring bulky on her fingers and the combined were no bigger than her wedding ring.

“Thank you,” Rin whispered, twisting the bands and noticing how the silver and gold seemed to blend well together , “they’re absolutely gorgeous…”

In response, Sesshomaru lifted her fingers to his lips and gently kissed her knuckles. She blushed a little at this , and couldn’t help but smile.

She finished getting ready and  the demon waited beside the door until she called to him. Turning, Sesshomaru found her taking his hand and slipping a present in his fingers.

“Happy Christmas,” Rin said, closing his fingers around  the grey box.

Sesshomaru paused at her gift. He gently lifted the  lid of the box to reveal a small pin made for neckties and ascot s . It was a flower,  _ his _ family’s flower.

She’ d given him a white cherry blossom in the middle of a  red  hexagon . Each of the six petals was set with a pearl, and the center was a red ruby. From whom she’d commissioned it from he had no idea , as he knew almost every jeweler , but it was a stunning piece none the less.

“I hope you like it,” Rin said, “ I notice you’re starting to like  ascots more and more…”

Sesshomaru kissed her on the forehead, bringing her close to him .

“Thank you.”

Rin  smiled, slowly taking the pin and slipping it into the large tie he wore. Her fingers were careful, and Sesshomaru watched her work.

They walked out to gether, greeting the entire family  that were slowly gathering in the main room.  The family gushed and thanked each other over their presents, Izayoi taking a moment to admire the ring Rin wore on her  finger. Kagome was  bright and bubbly and it seemed to infect  almost everyone. Even Sesshomaru and InuYasha, who had barely spoken two kind words to each other all week, were civil to each other. Though, that might’ve had more  to do with the fact that alcohol was served relatively early and didn’t seem to slow throughout the day and into the night.

Rin half-expected  them to host a huge event for everyone in the community , but InuTaisho  only wanted to keep the holidays for the family. There were a few card games, which Rin found herself doing poorly but her husband was rather successful , especially when money was on the table. When dinner came, it was practically picturesque.  A g listening turkey surrounded by stuffing,  crispy roasted potatoes, and vegetables that were greener than they should be for that time of the year.

It  was an enjoyable feast, with everyone leaving the table almost uncomfortably full. Rin walked with Kagome and Izayoi, the tree of them off to spend some time alone , which left the men of the family to head into a room and enjoy one of InuTaisho’s more expensive drinks.

“It’s nice to have you joining us this year,” InuTaisho said as he handed Sesshomaru his drink, “Rin’s really made an impression on you.”

“ I don’t think—”

“Bullshit,” InuYasha commented, sipping his own glass, “ you’re nicer… well, for you,” he added after a moment, ignoring his elder brother’s glare.

“It’s true,” InuTaisho said, “ normally you’d bite his head off for saying something like that. Now? You’re just glaring at him. A  marketed improvement.”

Sesshomaru just sat back, running his tongue over his teeth .

“How has she been? Settling in?”

“Well,” Sesshomaru said honestly, “everyone seems to like her, and she’s navigated most of the pitfalls well.”

“I hear Rin had a bit of an altercation with Naraku,” InuTaisho commented .

At this Sesshomaru paused. He hadn’t really had a moment to talk about these things with his father , so he suspected that elder might not want to discuss it.

“She hit him,” Sesshomaru finally admitted, InuY asha spitting up his drink.

“Did she really!?” InuYasha laughed, “man! Wish I could have seen it!”

“So do I.”

“You weren’t there?” InuTaisho asked.

“I was  talking with some businessmen when I heard a slap,” Sesshomaru said, “when I turned around to look, Rin was walking towards the  balcony and Naraku was looking both surprised and angered at the same time.”

“And?” InuYasha asked, “was the look on his face as good as we thought?”

Sesshomaru glanced to his brother before back to his father.

“Better.”

InuYasha laughed at this.

“I’m  gonna have to attend more parties with the three of you.”

“Rin might rather you didn’t.”

“How do you mean?” InuYasha asked after taking a drink.

“She was upset that she let herself get pushed so far,” Sesshomaru explained, “ being here has helped her forget the incident, but—”

“I’m sure everyone else will have forgotten it by now,” InuTaisho commented, “and if she’s as loved as you say, they won’t hold it against her.”

“Naraku’s climbed over more people than just us,” InuYasha piped up,  “I doubt he can really spin this.”

They managed to steer the conversation away from  Naraku and business, given how it was one of InuTaisho’s rules over the holidays. Sesshomaru kept mostly quiet, while InuYasha and his father were happy to laugh and tease. The ir night drew to a close when a young woman knocked on the door.

“Sorry to  interrupt ,” Rin  said, “InuYasha? Kagome is asking for you.”

“Oh! Right, thanks,” he sat up, placing his empty glass on the  tray , “night!”

“Good night!” InuTaisho waved, while Sesshomaru simply nodded.

Rin whispered something to InuYasha about Kagome possibly having too much to drink before she turned and waved to InuTaisho and Sesshomaru, the elder demon noticing how his son’s  eyes never left his wife’s form.

“She seems happier too.”

Sesshomaru seemed to take interest in  his drink at that moment.

“Sesshomaru…”

“I have not had nearly enough alcohol for you and I to talk about  this ,” Sesshomaru said .

InuTaisho sighed, leaning back against the  glass liquor cabinet. His son was a stubborn one, especially when it came to his own feelings.

“ So drink up.”

His son paused, looking up at his father.

“I thought you like the holidays to be  conflict-free .”

“ So make it easy for me,” the demon crossed his arms, “ I’m worried the steps you are taking aren’t big enough.”

“Father— ”

“Do you love her?”

The younger demon’s reaction told InuTaisho that the question he’d asked was not one Sesshomaru expected.

“What do you—”

“I’m your father; I know you better than most,” InuTaisho explained, “ I can also gleam that when you say you two sleep in the same bed, that’s all you do.”

This was not a conversation Sesshomaru wanted to have with his own father.

“I can’t give her a child,” Sesshomaru finally admitted, “it would truly trap her. She’s already sacrificed so  much , I can’t do that to her.”

“Sesshomaru—"

“ As it stands now, s he  still  has the option to leave me,” Sesshomaru told his father, “annulment… or affair . If she has a child, all those options for her vanish. "

“You’d let her go? Just like that?”

“She’s still that same little girl who ran around looking for fairies on toadstools,” Sesshomaru sa id, “she believes in happy endings and chivalrous knights—”

“So be one… and give her that.”

InuTaisho was softer now.

“You are deciding how she feels before asking her; that’s moronic, even for the men in this family,” InuTaisho said , “that’s not keeping her safe.”

To this Sesshomaru kept quiet.

“I’m not  some chivalrous knight or prince ,”  he said after a moment , “ I’m the monster  her father warned about.”

“I think he’d warn her about anyone.”

“How do you mean?” Sesshomaru asked.

“Well… he’s gotten more protective of her, since her mother passed,” InuTaisho explained, “ to be honest, when I heard he was willing to give her away to anyone I was surprised.”

“Still—"

“She’s either a woman who’s forcing herself to do everything for her family and doesn’t want to love you, or she’s the little girl who played in the mud looking for frogs,” InuTaisho  looked down to his son,  “she cannot be both. And don’t go thinking  that you’re powerful enough to ruin her , ” the elder demon refilled his and his son’s glass, “never would’ve pictured you for a prude.”

“Father—"

“But what you’re doing isn’t fair ,” InuTaisho handed him his son’s glass back, “regardless of what  you think is going on in her head , it isn’t fair.”

Sesshomaru looked to his glass, taking in the deep brown colour before he  down the rest in a single swallow.

“I’m going to bed.”

“Alright,” InuTaisho didn’t fight his son as he stood to leave,  “ a nd Sesshomaru?”

The demon turned to face his father.

“Whatever you’re not telling me isn’t going to go away on its own,” InuTaisho said sternly, “ it’s only going to get worse.”

Sesshomaru said nothing. Leaving quietly, he made his way to his room, feeling the several dinks he’d shared with his father starting to hit him.

Rin returned a few moments after he did.  To her surprise, Sesshomaru was already lying on the bed. He had undressed but had the co vers pulled up over his bare chest. One hand was over his stomach while the other  rested beside his head, and his amber eyes opened slowly to look at her.

“Sorry,” Rin whispered,  shutting the door quietly behind her,  “didn’t think I’d wake you...”

“Hm...”

The young woman started to take off her skirt and outer garments, wondering what she was going to do about the  drink Kagome  had spilt on her.

“If you need to wash up or anything, you don’t need to worry about keeping me awake.”

Grateful for his nose, Rin quietly thanked him, and shut the wooden door  behind her.  She undressed quietly in the bathroom,  bathing quickly before she returned to a quietly dark room. Using nothing but the light of the moon, Rin walked over to her side of the bed, finding herself much too alert to fall back to sleep. The young woman remained  awake , the sheets around her  chest and her eyes staring up at the canopy.

The week had been much more fun than she thought it could go. His entire family was warm and wonderful, and even Sesshomaru showed some  softening around the edges. Kagome had, after having more than a few, gushed about how much nicer Sesshomaru was around her and how she was really happy to have her as a sister.

“Hey,” Rin whispered, leaning over on her arm, “how’d it  go with your father?”

“ Hm …”

“Are you alright?” Rin’s fingers slipped under his bangs to feel his temperature, “I should get you some water…”

In an instant, Sesshomaru’s arms were wrapped around her waist and he brought his nose to her collarbone . Rin was pushed onto the bed, her back to the mattress and her arms between them.

“Sesshomaru!?”

“If you don’t want me, push me away.”

Rin slowly put her hands on his shoulders,  feeling his lips press on her throat . She could smell the whiskey on his breath and wondered just how much he’d had to drink.

“Sesshomaru…?”

He came to hover over her now, his eyes unreadable  and his long hair falling around her. Her fingers came to grip the wrist that was by her hea d and she just stared up him. There was a moment between them when there was nothing .

Sesshomaru lowered towards his wife, and Rin accepted his kiss . They moved slowly at first, Ri n trying her best to work with him and he moving slowly for her. She opened her mouth when he slipped his tongue over her lips ; Rin found the sensation  odd, but that didn’t mean she didn’t enjoy it. Her husband really was better than the rumours let on.

Now she could really taste the alcohol on his lips . A part of her thought she should push him off, try this again when he was sober. But then again, he wouldn’t try this sober, would he?

They parted to her panting, and her husband ’ s long fingers finding their way up  the  top of her  nightgown . There was a rough ripping sound, and Rin felt her torso be jerked  with the tearing. She was now, very viscerally, reminded of his strength as a demon.

She wondered if there was something wrong with her, for feeling as excited about it as she did.

He paused for a moment, clearly studying her reaction .

“I’m okay…”

Sesshomaru seemed surprised to hear her say that , though he took her encouragement at face value. His lips met hers again, his tongue slipping into her mouth and making it harder for Rin to properly breathe.  Her legs shuffled under his, and the demon  fingers started to  travel down her sides.

He started to move further and further down her chest , his lips parting from hers to press on the  soft skin. His hands were gentle on her flesh, clearly, he was trying his best not to leave too many marks on her. Rin own fingers were on his back, her unsure of where to move or what to do while he kissed and sucked  the valley of her breasts.

She felt his tongue run over  her skin , and she could feel his muscles tense and knot under her fingers . His tongue was running over her neck and jawline as one of his hands pushed  the skirt of her nightgown  up , the material pooling around his  forearm.

“Just tell me to stop and I will…” the demon whispered, lips skimming her throat.

“D… Don’t…”

Again, the demon studied her, something unknown hiding in his amber eyes. Slowly, his mouth returned to hers, and this time she took a more proactive role in kissing him back. Her head lifted off the mattress  and her hands moved to cup his cheeks. He groaned from the back of his throat as her fingernails ran over his scalp , and his  fingers trailed further and further up her thigh.

“ _ HAH! _ ”

Rin immediately clamped her hand over her mouth, toes curling as she felt his fingers slip into her. She tilted her head away from  him as she adjusted  to having  his fingers slide further and further into her.

“ _ Mm… mph!” _

Her legs curled around his body, and he pushed himself  closer to her, his teeth returning to the  flesh of her neck. He was careful with her, and she could feel his eyes watching her reaction s, but for what?  Sesshomaru was whispering something over her skin in a tone she couldn’t hear, and was currently too distracted to listen too .

“ _ HA!” _

What Sesshomaru was looking for he found.  Excitement shot up her spine as he pressed somewhere inside of her that made her body  jerk and twitch. He was  more attentive there now , pressing and rubbing and making her moan more and more. She couldn’t hold it back, and her hands reached above her head and gripped the pillow, her chest swelling and panting.

Sesshomaru  made her body tighten faster than he anticipated, and she shuddered  under him.  She was left panting on the pillows, her body  warm and chest heaving.

The demon looked down at her, watching her as she tried to gather her thoughts. He leaned close to her,  kissing her cheeks as he moved closer to her.

“Sesshomaru…”

Her hand touched his chest and her mood seemed to change. Confused, he leaned back, letting Rin sit up in her torn nightgown. Her face was unreadable and she seemed to be searching for her words.

“Not… I don’t want you drunk,” Rin whispered, hugging him tightly.

“Alright…”

H e held her close, nose in her hair . She could feel his chest on hers,  and  she enjoyed being close to his warmth.

Rin’s fingers ran over his shoulder muscles,  her lips to his smooth skin.

Was it so wrong that  a part of her didn’t want him to stop? But a bigger part of her wanted it to be fully and truly him. Not fueled by any alcohol , but just as he was.

The glint of the moon’s light on her ring made her pause, and she lifted her finger up to catch more of the light. They’d been together for six months, and only now was he beginning to act like this towards her, but he’d always  seem to let her lead and waited for her word. Maybe it was his way of making sure he knew what she wanted ...

“Sesshomaru?”

“ Hm ?”

She pulled back, took his cheeks in her  hands, and brought him back for another kiss.

He didn’t question her and instead pulled her down to the mattress, keeping her close in his arms. 

As she fell asleep next to him , she mulled over the night in her head , trying to remember what he’d said while whispering at her neck. It was odd, but she could’ve sworn he was saying “I love you” over and over again.


	15. New Years

“Kaede—OW!”

Rin squeaked as the woman roughly combed and pulled at her hair. She bit her lip, but it did nothing to dull the pain.

“Are you almost ready?”

Rin turned to look to her husband, the demon already dressed  smartly with his hair in a  tied low . The bottom half was in a braid which gave the  illusion of his hair flowing free.  The suit was a deep navy blue; a stark contrast to the gold she was planning to  wear.

“There!” Kaede stepped back to admire her work, “I’ll get your dress miss.”

Sesshomaru stepped aside to let the old woman bustle past, the demon shutting the door behind her.

“Almost,” she nodded,  her brush running through her bangs once more, the rest of her hair swept up and back in an intricate knot . “There,” she smiled,  “now I just need my dress,” she turned to look at the demon fully, “you look good…”

“Thank you.”

The two hadn’t talked much about that night. At first Rin assumed he had been drunk, but nothing about his behavior suggested he was hungover. She did try to breach the subject, but he suddenly became more interested in spending time in common areas where family might walk in on them. 

Once they returned home, Rin kept  trying to pry,  but the demon acted like he didn’t know what she was talking about. Maybe he  _ was  _ drunk that night, and just particularly good at hiding the signs afterwards. Still, she  kept thinking about  the words  he’d whispered over her body that night; calling her things like “beautiful” and “perfect”.

“Here.”

Rin looked from her mirror to the package placed beside her. 

“Thank you?”

“It’s a New Years present,” was all Sesshomaru said, “open it.”

Curious, the young woman reached for  the velvet case, her hand pulling the  lid open slowly.

“Oh…”

She honestly didn’t know what to say.

The demon hadn’t been cheap w hen it came to her gifts. Diamond earrings with  rubies that looked like they could set the world on fire,  an amethyst necklace tha t was surrounded by gold butterflies ,  a sapphire broach that might kill a man  if thrown from a decent height, just to name a few.

This was not to say any of them were gaudy by any means. Sesshomaru had quite an eye for exquisite jewelry that proudly commanded attention rather than demand it. Most of her pieces were smaller, and they seemed to fit her personality well.

But  _ this _ …

It looked to be a piece of horse brass for a Martingale, specifically for rather large draft horses . The medal was round and  well kept, but clearly not a n ew piece. Her fingers ran over the worn metal, the tips trailing over the  bumps and ridges , feeling her way around the  proud stag.

She looked up to her husband, her jaw slack while he  was in his usual impassive face, the only indication she received was the jerk of his h ead towards their  door .

Silently, the young woman r ose from her chair to move quietly down the stairs,  wrapping herself in a large coat  along the way before  slipping her stocking feet into some woolen boots . The door opened slowly before Rin all b ut squealed and slipped out into the winter’s air.

The young woman reminded herself to tip the stable boy handsomely for not only working on New Year’s Eve but for standing in the cold for who knew how long with her  horse tugging at the rope.

When she was a child, she became fascinated with the brass the work h orses got to wear for shows. Apparently, she had bugged her  father so much he had promised her than when she  got her own beast, he would give her one just like it.

On the day that she was supposed to turn of age, she  got one.

That, and her  rather stocky gelding.

Her father had insisted that she not ride some, as he put it, “slim  prancer ” but a  horse that “could do its own work”. And so, she was likely the only young woman who rode a  rather short draft horse . The animal was a  large one, but stocky, well-built, and had wider hooves than most. It was by no means a tall  horse , but it wasn’t  a pony either . Its mane was long and thick  and  black and his body  a pale brown ,  but given how often it would roll around in the mud and dirt it would sometimes be a greenish-brown, and look like scales .

And he was here with her.

“Ah-Un!”

His name had been something of an accident, but the animal seemed to enjoy it and responded well enough, so she kept it.

The horse was eager to return to her, his neck and body extending towards her outstretched arms.

“Oh I missed you,” Rin whispered, running her fingers through the thick man e while the hose sniffed her  eagerly.

Her arms wrapped around his muzzle and head, holding him close and burying her nose into the front  pieces of his mane. He even smelt the same. She overhead her husband thanking the stable boy , but he kept a respectful distance.

“ Wh … When did you manage to get him here?” the young woman asked, sniffling quietly , her tears one of happiness.

“Just tonight,” the demon shrugged, his own hand extended for the animal to sniff it, “ your father told me he was important to you.”

“He… He is,” she nodded, “so important…”

Her head came to rest on the animal’s forehead, the creature remaining as still as he could as he  let his mistress hold him tightly. Rin cried when she found out she had to leave him behind. Her father had told her that  she needed to conform to her new family, so that meant  leaving behind wouldn’t fit in, and that included the horse. It was the one thing she begged her father to let her have , and the one thing he refused to give her.

“Thank you…”

The demon was grateful for his hearing. Without it, he wouldn’t have heard her  quiet whisper.

The young woman looked up to her husband, his amber eyes watching as  he gently ran his fingers over the muzzle.

“You-”

“ You have given up much for your family,” Sesshomaru explained quietly, “you were owed a little piece of home ,” he paused, “well; you are owed a lot more, but for now,  I’ve brought him.”

“Are you sure?” Rin whispered, her hand running over the soft muzzle, “he won’t fit in here.”

Sesshomaru’s hand was to Ah- Un’s forehead , his fingertips touching the long  mane.

“Who cares?”

He couldn’t see her face, but he could feel how much more relaxed she became at those words.

“We’ll go riding tomorrow,” Rin was promising the horse, “and there’s so much fresh green grass around here when the snow melts … you’ll love it.”

Ah-Un nickered at this, smacking his hoof on the white powder.

“We’re going to be late,” the demon informed her,  gesturing to the stable boy, “make sure he’s well cared for.”

“Yes Milord,” the boy bowed low before he gently took the lead back from the young woman, letting her kiss the animal tenderly before it was taken to his stall.

“I’ll uh… I’ll go get into my dress…”

Sesshomaru stood aside,  watching as she ran into the house.

Ah- U n looked back for his mistress, languidly flicking his tail  as he walked on. He seemed a calm horse, plodding along at his own pace, but he was also rather stubborn, as he refused to move when Jaken first pulled on his reins to hide him  lest they ruin the surprise .  The demon followed her shortly after, getting fully prepared for the cold winter’s night.

“Ready!”

The demon looked up to the young woman, watching as she sl owly descended in her gold gown. 

Rin was never a woman for ostentatious wear, and this dress was surprisingly no exception. The gold was a gentler one,  seemingly bathing the world she walked in in the metallic hue. It trialed behind her, the dress  slightly off her shoulders while  the sleeves were made of tulle that wrapped  around her . It was both tight to her slight curves and yet draped her in the most flattering of ways. 

“ Hope  we’re not too late,” Rin breathed, the excitement of her gift still in her step.

“We’ll be fine,” the demon informed her, slipping a fur  coat over  her shoulders and arms , “you look beautiful.”

Rin’s heart fluttered at the words. There they were again. Him calling her beautiful.

“Thank you…”

The two stepped into the carriage, Rin keeping close to the demon given the chill and his arm was around her waist.  She watched as the  banks of snow seemed to roll like the w aves, going from hill to valley, peaceful and serene , illuminated by the light spilling from houses, full of food and friends as everyone gathered to ring in the new year.

“Do you have any resolutions for the coming year?”

Sesshomaru turned to face her, hi s face calm and impa ssive.

“I rarely make those sorts of things,” he told her, “if I want change in my life, I do it. I find it pointless to make everything  change because of one day.”

“I guess that makes sense,” Rin nodded, the demon reminding her of her father’s words.

“And you?” 

S he hummed quietly as she  thought of her answer. 

In truth, there were more than a few resolutions she wanted to give. Be happie r,  see her family more,  make more friends.

Become closer to her husband.

“I suppose… I’ d like to see more of the world.”

It wasn’t everything, but it was what she was choosing to share with her husband . Anything else, she felt, might be  just embarrassing.

Maybe one day…

T he horses continued to clatter along the snowy roads, Rin letting the carriage jostle her around.

“ Where would you like to go?”

It was odd for Sesshomaru to keep up a conversation with her, but it  she was grateful all the same.

“I  dunno ,” she paused, then, “I’d like to go see my father. And thank him for the presents…”

“He was generous yes.”

Rin had wondered why they weren’t visiting family for New Years , but Sesshomaru told her that  he, his father, and his brother would often visit separate parties, for separate reasons. 

InuYasha would gather his friends  for a New Year’s feast and drinks , InuTaisho would spend time with demo n lords and ladies , and Sesshomaru, who was more business oriented, would join his  compatriots for a night. Rin didn’t mind it so much, as the event seemed  more formal than the other ones they attended , and she enjoyed seeing her dress come together.

They both greeted their rather drunk host and accepted the champagne that was given to them. Walking arm and arm, Sesshomaru did the rounds, Rin standing dutifully beside him as he talked to his business associates. He casually wished them a new year and set up something for January. 

Sesshomaru took Rin onto the  dancefloor for more than one song, all languid pieces, and the two of them moving fluidly in  each other’s arms . Rin would talk to a few women, and they’d all wish her much happiness and fertility, the latter of which Rin would blush at. She wished them success and watched as they would run off to another area of the room for refills or talks with their husband s.

“Ah… Lord Sesshomaru! And Lady Rin…”

The night was  almost perfect.

Rin wanted nothing more than to duck away  from the approaching  half-demon.

“Hello you two!” Naraku greeted the stiff adults like they were old friends ,  “ h ow was Christmas ? ” he looked from one to the other, “I heard you spent it with your father’s family.”

“We did, yes,” Sesshomaru said.

“Not hers?” Naraku looked to Rin, “interesting…”

Rin really wished Naraku could just vanish.

“I hope you two enjoyed it as much as I did,” Naraku prattled on, “ tell me, Lord Sesshomaru, what was your first Christmas as a married man like?”

“It was fine ,” Sesshomaru was very stiff and trying to push Rin away.

“Fine!?” the half-demon laughed, “oh… that’s not something your lovely wife wants to hear…”

“ I’m not offended,” Rin said simply, keeping her tone polite.

“No?” the young man pulled back, “ what an amazing woman you are,” his hand went to his face, “with an amazing strike too.”

“ That’s not what I heard,” Sesshomaru said, “ I heard you walked into a door.”

“A door!” Naraku was laughing now, “what a funny man you are!” his head tilted, “ wherever did you hear a rumor like that? Your brother perhaps?”

“ Like I’d listen to him,” the demon muttered .

“I must have a word with  whomever you are speaking with,” the half-demon said, “spreading awful rumors like that… who would  _ do  _ something like that?”

“Who indeed,” Rin whispered, drawing Naraku’s eyes.

“B ut you know, m y cheek still stings,” Naraku pouted, “perhaps  you could kiss it better , Lady Takahashi…”

“Perhaps you should learn when to speak,” Sesshomaru  said coolly, “ if it transpired as you said, you spoke out of turn, and was struck for it. I do not see why she needs to make any amends. Least of all to you. ”

“At least let me take her for a dance—”

“Over my dead body,” Sesshomaru whispered , his lip curling at the suggestion.

“Be careful what you wish for,” Naraku hissed, eyes narrowing  and making Rin take a step closer to her husband , “someone might be happy to grant that ,” he eyed Rin , “and maybe take care of your wife in your absence.”

Rin tightened her grip on Sesshomaru’s arm,  keeping him close lest the half-demon made good on his threat. From the look in his eyes, she didn’t doubt it for a second.

“ Well;  Happy New Year to you both,” Naraku  smiled to them, “I  sense this will be an eventful year for the  both of you.”

He strode away , throwing one last smirk to the couple .

“Rin…”

She looked up to him, wondering what had come over the demon for him to start a conversation.

“It’s not me you should worry about,” Sesshomaru told  her, pulling  one of  her  hands  away , “I can handle myself.”

“Too late,” she stuck close to him, “ Narak u’s usually more subtle  than that… isn’t he? ”

“Yes,” Sesshomaru glanced over to the half-demon, “ Rin—”

“I wouldn’t marry him.”

Her comment surprised him, and the demon stopped .

“No?”

“I have some sense,” Rin smiled up at him, “ and… I couldn’t be with a monster.”

“But you are with me.”

“How do you mean?” Rin asked, pulling him off to the side.

“ Don’t act like I’m some  c harming Prince,” Sesshomaru  said, “ I—”

“You are not like Naraku.”

Her fingers reached to touch his cheek , her fingertips running over his mark ings.

“Rin—”

“That night… when I asked you to be sober,” Rin tried to hide her blush, “ do you think he would’ve stopped?”

Sesshomaru studied her face, his hand slowly reaching to wrap around her fingers. 

“No…”

“You’re a good man, Sesshomaru,” she  said, “I know showing it is…it’s hard for you,” she swallowed, “but you are.”

The demon kept quiet as he took her hand and turned his face to kiss her palm .

“Thank you.”

“I’d like you to show more…” Rin wasn’t sure why she was saying this,  “it doesn’t have to be to everyone,” she added quickly, “but… I’d like to see it , just a little more… ”

Sesshomaru opened his mouth, clearly unsure of what to tell her. At that moment, t hey both heard the cheering from the rest of the  guests, causing them to turn to the  outlandishly large clock that stood in the ballroom.

Midnight was nearly here.

A new year.

Ne w  possibilities, opportunities ; all  in the coming year.

“Sesshomaru.”

The demon turned to look down at her, her hand tugging at his sleeve . Stepping up to him, the young woman looked up to her husband, her lungs taking in a deep breath.

“Happy New Year.”

Sesshomaru said nothing as he lowered his lips to meet hers, his hands reaching to splay on her back and edge her closer to him. Rin  kept quiet as he brought her to him . Her long, black lashes fluttered close d at the contact, her free hand reaching to touch his chest. He tasted like alcohol and his musky  cologne filled her senses. His kisses were firm, full of  confidence and yet reassuring. 

She didn’t know how long they were like that, but their parting was gentle  and left Rin’s heart fluttering. It was clear; the demon was experienced in such matters.

Something she wasn’t entirely ungrateful for.

“And to you,” he whispered, Rin’s eyes looking u p at him with a light pink on her cheeks.

The amber eyes held something new, something softer and more at ease.

If it was possible, it made him all the more attractive.

A shout from out in the gardens distracted her. The young woman turned to look at all the other  couples; some cheering and toasting while others were doing exactly what she and her husband had just  been engaged in.  The fireworks had already started, and their colors were bathing the guests in colors of greens, blues, reds and golds.

She smiled as her head came to rest on his shoulder, her arms wrapped around his . The demon looked down to her for a moment before out to the  celebrating couples on the patio, all too intoxicated with alcohol  too entranced by the fireworks  to actually notice anyone else around them. Sesshomaru was careful as he  lifted  his hand to cover her s. Taking this chance, Rin interlocked her fingers in his, happy that he  listened to her .

Sesshomaru took the opportunity to pull her to the dancefloor once again , this time with a woman who was ready for their dance. Rin spun with her gold dress ,  smile practically immoveable. They managed to avoid Naraku for the rest of the evening, thanks to Sesshomaru seeming more  determined to keep her away from him.

When they went home, Rin was honestly surprised that her feet weren’t bleeding, but  they were more than a little tender.

“Ow!”

Sesshomaru stopped taking off his coat to look down at her .

“Is everything alright?”

“Feet hurt,” Rin laughed, “think I danced a little too much —"

She squeaked as the demon suddenly  lifted her into the air . Her arms immediately  wrapped around his neck, and she  held onto him.

“A-Aren’t my skirts too big—”

“No ,”  he murmured, “it’s my fault your feet hurt; let me take care of you.”

Rin blushed at his words , at let herself be carried up the stairs and towards their bedroom. He was careful as he put her on the bed, her feet on the floor and her hands still on his arms.

“Thank you,” Rin smiled up at him, “for  carrying me… and for the dances… and for Ah-Un…”

Sesshomaru ’s head ti lted , his hands coming to either side of  her and his lips meeting hers.

“Thank you,” he whispered,  “for…  everything you do.”

Rin found the bed warmer that night ,  as the demon  slept close to her with his lips to her hair and his arms around her. She felt his heart beat a little stronger against her hand , and she was grateful that she stayed awake long enough to feel him  tighten his hold on her. Maybe, for all his posturing, he really did make a resolutio n .


	16. Winter Ride

Sesshomaru woke to an empty bed and light streaming into his room. He was surprised to find Rin missing , and got up to find  her.  He noticed the outfit she wanted to change into was gone and her nightgown was across the stool. Curious, the demon wrapped himself in his deep purple robe and made his way downstairs. It was unusual for Rin to be up and dressed before him , though he suspected it had more to do with  the animal that was now occupying his stables.

Tenseiga took his full retirement well since  he was an old horse . Sesshomaru only made that decision once  the vet told him that the  beast would be fully  blind in no more than three months. Rin was upset, but  she took it in stride, and Tenseiga was still spoiled rotten  with sugar cubes and carrots . She was careful never to give him too much and make him sick , and she would always rub him down with warm water and give him hot oats after he came in from the cold.

The demon walked into the  sitting room, finding her with her knees on the cushions and her arms on the back. She was looking out the window with a big goofy grin on her face.

“What are you doing up?” he asked, coming stand behind her.

“Watching Ah-Un panic your stable hands,” Rin teased, pointing to the horse that was just waltzing around at its leisure, “I should have told you; he has a nasty habit of getting out of his stall,” she explained, “didn’t matter the lock, he could figure it out. Eventually father and I just let him wander. He never goes far.”

As if on cue Sesshomaru saw a groom run out to grab the animal’s halter and start to pull him back, only for the stock horse to stand perfectly still. No matter how much the young man called and nudged and pulled Ah-Un only stood there, looking mildly amused. When a second joined in and started pulling, the horse began to lean away, but managed to remain firmly where he was.

Laughing, Rin sat up from her spot on the couch, and called Kaede over for her coat and gloves.

“Where are you off too?” Sesshomaru asked.

“I promised him a ride,” Rin said, “and I think I need to save your employees from more embarrassment,” she paused, “would you like to join us?”

“Not today,” Sesshomaru told her, “I  have meetings through  this afternoon.”

“Everything alright?”

“Nothing to concern yourself over,” the demon said, standing to join her, “I’ll have a word with the groom about Ah-Un for you.”

He made his way upstairs to ready himself for the day, and found her waiting for him when he returned to the front door.

“We haven’t spent much time together this week ,” Rin said simply, “I wanted to catch up with you.”

“Not much to catch up,” Sesshomaru told her , “work ’s  been busier than I expected.”

“Isn’t that a good thing?” she asked, slipping on her coat, “ I thought you like working?”

“Not when I’m dealing with less  than competent people,” the demon followed her out into the snow .

They walked in unison, Rin doing most of the talking  between them until she came to where three of Sesshomaru’s stable workers were trying to move the very sturdy horse.

“Ah-Un!”

Ears perked at Rin’s voice, the horse began to trot his way towards her, tail and head erect.  The three men stumbled for a moment, but they let him go with a stunned look on their faces.

“Come on,” Rin laughed, “no more mischief!” she tapped the horse’s nose, “time for that ride I promised you.”

The horse stuck its nose in her palm, muscles twitching before it sniffed at Sesshomaru. The demon  turned to the animal, holding his palm out for the animal to slip his muzzle into. Ah-Un followed the two of them into the stable, his head between the couple and turning from Rin to Sesshomaru.

“He likes you,” Rin said, seeing Sesshomaru pat the animal’s neck.

“He’s an intelligent animal,” Sesshomaru said, “it’s apparent he missed you.”

“Yeah…”

Sesshomaru was surprised that the animal stood patiently as Rin brushed him down and began to tack him up. No ties , just the horse standing still for Rin. He had a specially designed bit-less bridle, which was surprisingly ornate for someone from Rin’s family. His saddle was just as detailed, and fit him snuggly. Sesshomaru stood at the end, his eyes darting to his newest edition and the other stallion.

“Everything alright?” Rin asked, standing beside her horse.

“ Bakusaiga and  Tokijin will get at each other if they can,” Sesshomaru eyes both of the animals, “the stable hands are skilled enough to know when to rotate them, but I’d still like to keep them away from each other.”

“You could always geld one,” Rin suggested lightly.

“They’re both purebreds from strong lines,” Sesshomaru turned to her, “out of the question.”

“Ah- Un’s just a mixed,” she patted the strong neck, “and father didn’t want too many stallions in the stable.”

The demon  followed her out, the horse’s reins in her hands though it seemed a formality at best.  Sesshomaru helped her mount up, pausing with one hand on the horse’s neck and one resting on her thigh.

“Ride safe,” he told her, glancing to the horse.

“I’ll be fine,” Rin assured him, “I’m just going down the road and back,” she looked down to him, “why? Did what Naraku  say last  time we met  worry you?”

Sesshomaru didn’t hesitate.

“Yes,” he looked up to her, “if you’re not back in an hour, I’ll send someone to find you.”

“You can always come with me.”

“Not this time,” he gently squeezed her fingers, “don’t linger longer than you have too.”

“Alright.”

Rin smiled, then leaned over to kiss him.

Sesshomaru was much more open with their physical contact, even in front of the staff . It was more than just hugs and touches, but he would steal kisses from her and not stop if his employees walked  in. Parting slowly, Rin  squeezed his hand back and then guided Ah-Un down the road. Sesshomaru watched her trot off  until the trees blocked his view, and he turned to head inside.

Ah-Un seemed to enjoy  his new surroundings, and his nose was up into the air and sniffing at everything around him. Rin enjoyed the long languid steps her horse took, constantly patting him on the neck  and gently encouraging him onwards.

Rin felt herself adjust quickly to Ah- Un’s pace, languid but long, and his large hooves left tracks in the fresh snow. Her leather glove patted his neck,  shivering slightly at the cold breeze. It was getting colder now, and she did need to be more careful. While it wasn’t nearly as bad as her home, the wind on her skin still bit . She urged her horse into a  brisk trot,  feeling his strong muscles move under her legs. Her absence  from Ah- Un’s life was evident in how out of breath her horse was after a few minutes, but Rin knew that  within a few months he’d be back in fighting form.

Their path took the two down a long and winding road, Rin passing by the path to the lake, the small opening made her pause. Would it be frozen over now? What would it look like? The snow was already mounting, and she figured that her horse might tire himself out quickly if she tried to cut through the snow in his current condition. Maybe next time…

A great black beast  suddenly appeared  on the crest of the hill . Startled, Rin  moved aside to let the rider and horse pass. It wasn’t until he was nearly upon her did Rin recognize the rider.

She tasted relief as the large horse passed her, and thought he was simply going to ride on.

“Ah! Lady Rin!” Naraku smiled to her, “I was just on my way to see  you and your husband. What a fortuitous  occurrence !”

Apparently, Rin wasn’t so lucky.

“Lord  Onishi …”

“What have I told you about being so formal with me?” Naraku dismounted smoothly, “ it’s Naraku, please.”

Rin tried to subtly pull Ah-Un back and away, finding it more difficult that Naraku blocked the only way she knew home. She could continue up the crest of the hill, but she would get lost if she carried on any further that way.

“How have you been, my Lady?” he asked smoothly .

“Well,” Rin swallowed, “and yourself?”

“I’m better for having run into you,” Naraku smiled, eyeing Ah-Un, “what an interesting steed you have.”

“He was  a gift from my father,” Rin said,  “when I came of age…”

“Ah yes… that was the same year you lost your mother, wasn’t it?”

Again, he chose to hurt her with that.

“About that time, yes,” Rin admitted , swallowing the pain he was deliberately dredged up.

“Such a hard time,” Naraku  hummed, “and yet, look at what a fine Lady you’ve become.”

Rin  took the chance to glance to her path back home. Sesshomaru said he’d send someone to find her when she’d been gone for an hour; how much more time was left?

“You are a beautiful woman,” the half-demon carried on, “it is really no wonder why Lord Sesshomaru had his eye on you.  Aside from your father’s business, that is ,” he smiled up at her before looking down to her horse, “a woman like you should be riding something more  refined; I have a white mare that would be— OW!”

Naraku recoiled with his hand between his legs . His fingers and thumb were pressing on the bubbling blood around his palm and back of his hand . Ah- Un’s head tossed as he backed up , Rin’s hands gathering up the reins as Naraku glared and her.

“I should have mentioned,” Rin  steadied Ah-Un, “he bites.”

The half-demon stood deliberately in her path, trusting that she  wouldn’t run him over with her sturdy gelding.

“Lord  Onishi ,” Rin bowed, encouraging her horse onward and home , taking careful steps around Naraku , “I owe you an apology—"

“I think you owe me more than that.”

Rin  pulled back as Naraku had one hand on the horse’s bridle while the other gripped her  shin .

“Twice now you have attacked me,” he hissed, “first you strike me, and now your horse mangles my hand,” he tightened his fingers around her leg, “ you owe me more than an apology and a dance.”

“Let go of me…”

She was now stuck between the half-demon and a rather high stone wall. Her horse couldn’t move much given the state of the hand on his bridle.

“Your husband isn’t coming,” tighter still, “and neither is your dear daddy.”

“Get off me !”

Ah-Un was not happy with his current prediction, and seemed like he wanted to get away from the man without throwing off his rider. His teeth were barred and his feet were dancing in the snow . Naraku was stronger than he looked and was able to keep the horse in place without getting kicked by the back hooves.

“You’ve been here  for half a year , and yet you think yo u’re better than everyone here . Just like your husband —"

“ You don’t know me!”

“But I’d like too . ” 

Naraku stepped closer to her , making Rin recoil . His hand became softer, and he moved it from her sh in and up to her thigh , “your husband doesn’t need to know…”

“But he would,” Rin tried to pull herself away,  feeling sickened by his contact,  “you  would take every chance to rub his face in it .”

“Half the fun of having a secret is telling it to everyon e.”

“You’re out of your mind if you think I’d ever  be unfaithful to Sesshomaru,” Rin said, her hand coming down to try and pull him off, “least of all with you.”

“I’m not so bad—”

“You’re  deplorable .”

Naraku flicked his tongue over his lips, clearly enjoying their back and forth.

“I wonder… what he would do if you  _ were  _ unfaithful,” Naraku mused , “do you think he’d lose himself?  Go on a rampage  and kill your lover? Maybe even you? ” his head tilted, “or… do you think he’d let you carry on? I wonder how far you could push it before he snaps? ” he laughed, “ can’t you just imagine his face as he walked into his office to find you underneath another man? That would be delicious…”

Desperately, her boot landed on his chest, her kick weakened by their distance. In an instant, Naraku’s fingers wrapped around her calf , and he took the chance to pull his chest to Ah- Un’s side. Rin’ felt even more uncomfortable with her  leg becoming tucked under his arm.

“Let go!”

“And miss this opportunity ? ” Naraku laughed, “ i f  only  I  was so lucky,” he smiled up at her,  his fingers slipping under her dress to touch the bare skin  on the underside of her thigh , “ to take what even the great Lord Sesshomaru couldn’t have—”

He recoiled as Rin managed to slam her knee into his face. Now she didn’t waste any time spurring Ah-Un on into a canter away  from the man bleeding over his coat. She  took the shortcut through a field, grateful that her horse could fly through snow and over walls like he was born to it , the adrenaline making his fitness a nonissue . Rin looked back only once, and saw the half-demon watching her flee. Though she wondered w hy he didn’t mount up and chase her, she knew he wouldn’t be far behind.

They arrived at home faster than she anticipated , both panting hard enough to leave white puffs in the air. Rin’s hair was starting to slip out  of its knot and fall around her face and even Ah-Un seemed  out of breath. She supposed they must’ve been an odd sight, as the stable hands approached her with cautious worry. Despite knowing she needed to  cool her horse off Rin dismounted and started to move towards the house , leaving her horse to be taken care of by the groom for the first time since she arrived in the West.

“Rin.”

She didn’t want to talk to her husband ; not now. Sesshomaru appeared at the doo r, and stood in her way as she tried to go into the house.

“Rin…” Sesshomaru froze, “why is there blood on your dress?”

Rin stopped, her heart still pounding as she looked down to  where Naraku had grabbed onto her. Where Ah-Un had bit him apparently bled bad enough  for there to be evidence on her dress. Despite the dark navy  blue she was wearing, the red touched some of the white lace. Her  disheveled appearance probably didn’t help h is worry, and she took a moment to try and  calm the strands around her face.

“Rin ! ?”

She didn’t say anything as she walked past him, Sesshomaru following closely behind.

“What happened!?”

“Nothing—”

“Rin—”

“I ran into Naraku.”

She was half-way up the  stairs when she told him. Sesshomaru  stopped a few steps below her , shock on his face.

“He’s probably coming to see you,” she admitted, “ I-I… Kaede!”

Rin ran up the rest of the stairs, calling for her handmaid. Letting her go , the demon returned to the main floor, waiting to hear the sounds of large hoof beats on the  drive.  Rin’s prediction turned out to  come true as Naraku rode up on his massive stallion . Sesshomaru stood outside to meet him, already fuming .

“Lord Sesshomaru…” Naraku dismounted quickly, any trace of his teasing smirk gone .

He didn’t seem as put together as he usually was. In fact, his anger and fury  was hardly hidden on his face as he marched up to the demon.

“I was just out for a ride, and I ran into your lovely wife,” the half-demon  told him, “you apparently gave her a monstrous beast for a present.”

“What did you do to Rin?”

Any trace of the politeness society expected a man of his stature to have were gone , and Sesshomaru just exuded danger. It only got worse when he noticed the healing wound on Naraku’s hand and he managed to piece two and two together.

“You accosted my wife,” Sesshomaru growled , “ HOW DARE—"

“ _ She  _ attacked  _ me _ ,” Naraku  said, “ you seem to  have a negative  influence on her; her father would be very disappointed in you.”

Now the demon  was ready to rip Naraku’s jaw from his skull.

“You touch my wife again, and you will lose whatever  appendage came nea r her,” Sesshomaru said threateningly.

“Who’s to say she didn’t tempt me?” Naraku whispered, “hitched up her pretty little skirt and let me  put my hands wherever I  wanted?”

“Because this isn’t your dream,” Sesshomaru growled .

“It’s not yours either,” Naraku said, “this is the real world, where  women have affairs with other Lords,” he paused, “ and sometimes , plot with their lovers to be rid of their  monstrous husbands —”

“That woman isn’t Rin—”

“It’s not the Rin  _ you  _ want,” the half-demon cut him off,  “but I doubt you even know the real woman you married .”

“Neither do you,” Sesshomaru said, “now get off my property, and don’t return.”

“We need to discuss—”

“LEAVE NOW!” all of Sesshomaru’s staff flinched at the volume  with which  their employer spoke , “or they’ll never find what’s left of you.”

He turned back into the house, slamming the door  behind him , blood rushing in his ears .  He hated to admit it, but Naraku really did know how to get under his skin in the most effective way. Taking a deep breath and steadying his nerves,  Sesshomaru made his way to where his wife was .

When he  announced his presence in the bathroom,  Rin looked up from the bathtub, her left leg  red and wet from scrubbing. Her dress from the afternoon had been thrown unceremoniously onto the floor and she was in nothing but her petticoats and stays. She wasn’t embarrassed to be seen like this, but that might’ve had to do with how  preoccupied her mind was.

“He’s gone,” Sesshomaru said.

“Not entirely…” Rin murmured, turning back to running the soap over he r leg .

“Rin—”

“I’m okay,” she said, more to herself than to him, “I’m okay…”

She kept to herself for the rest of the afternoon, and Sesshomaru let her be. It was apparent she didn’t want to talk to him or anyone else about what happened out there . Even Kaede confessed to Sesshomaru that Rin wouldn’t tell her what transpired between the  her and Naraku, but that Rin insisted that the dress be destroyed and she never wanted to see it again.

Ah-Un  seemed more agitated than usual. He was pacing outside in his winter coat , clearly looking for his mistress. He only seemed to calm down when Sesshomaru appeared,  his hand patting the animal’s surprisingly long muzzle . The demon led the animal back to its stall, keeping the door slightly ajar and making sure that he was well-tended too. Half-wishing the horse could speak, Sesshomaru hung around in the stable for a few moments longer before he went back in for a lonely dinner.

When he finally went looking for her, it was late in the evening and he found her sitting  in the library. Her  arms were wrapped around her legs and she was dressed in her nightgown. The book she  was reading was resting on the table and she was doing nothing but staring at the fire.

Sesshomaru approached slowly,  the young woman barely flinching as he walked around the couch to  stand behind the couch.

“Rin,” Sesshomaru said quietly, “are you hungry? You missed  dinner and lunch.”

“I’m fine,” Rin told him , “thank you.”

He stayed quiet as  he remembered her first few weeks here, too stressed to eat or do much of anything. She didn’t lose that much weight, but we worried that it would start to spiral .

“I’ll have Kaede send you up a plate—”

“You’re not going to ask me?”

Sesshomaru  stopped and  turned back to his wife, who was looking up to him with curiosity in her big brown eyes.

“About what happened?” Rin finished, “ you’re not going too—”

“You don’t want too.”

Rin seemed to relax at his assertion.

“I would ask that you no longer ride alone,” Sesshomaru told her,  “I should have insisted on it earlier this morning…”

“It’s not—”

“It’s not your fault either.”

She leaned towards  him , her head nestled by his hand.

“He just surprised me is all,” Rin said, her exhaustion written on her face , “ didn’t think he’d be that bold…”

Rin even sounded tired. For all the stunts Naraku has pulled, he was now pushing  too far. Sesshomaru felt his jaw tighten, wondering what he could do to keep Rin safe without locking her away in  the house until Naraku either lost interest or disappeared.

“Are you alright?”

She looked up at him, watching as  Sesshomaru came to sit by her feet .

“Yes,” she nodded, “ so long as I never have to see that dress again,” she gripped the skirt of her dress a little tighter, “ and he never puts his hands on me again…”

“Where did he touch you?”

“He didn’t hurt me.”

Her husband looked to her ,  clearly unsure of what to say . They stared at each other for a minute or two, nothing but the sound of fire popping and cracking between them.

Slowly, Rin lifted her nightgown up, first over her ankles then up her shins.

“Here…” 

Her hand touched her calf muscle and then slid up to the back of her thigh , where she could still remember Naraku’s cold  fingers.

“And here.”

She hated how embarrassed she felt.  N araku was the monster in all of this, not her. Rin was brought back to the present by her husband moving over her.

Ge ntly, the demon took her calf  in his hand and kissed her shin . Rin watched his with wide eyes , but she didn’t stop him. His other hand slid up her other leg slowly, his fingers  gently slipping under the lace trim of her nightgown. It stopped at her knee, he using it to prop himself up as he gently  kiss further and further up her shin. 

Eventually,  Sesshomaru’s fingers wrapped around her thigh and his lips came to press on the outside of  the muscle.  He was slow , and his kisses were tender on her leg . Her nightgown was held up by her hands,  her other leg relaxing somewhat and sliding further out under arm. If she had been paying more attention, she would have noticed this was  a very similar position that Naraku had forced her into earlier today.

Taking a deep breath, Rin leaned back to look up to the ceiling , her knuckles touching her lips . When Naraku’s fingers had touched her skin it made her  nauseous and want nothing more than to sit in a hot bath for eternity. With Sesshomaru?  He was  gentle with her, even tender and attentive . It was obvious that he was listening and responding to  what she was both saying and  what her body was doing. She didn’t feel trapped or forced,  and as he  followed her muscles , she almost wanted to tell him not to stop.

The demon lifted his lips  to look up at her , meeting her eyes and keeping contact as he came to hover over her .

“Better?”

Her head tilted at his question,  and  that coupled with her half-lidded eyes made Sesshomaru want her more.

“There’s no comparison…”

He took her cheek in his hand. Closing her eyes, Rin leaned into his palm ,  her lips kissing the inside of his wrist .

“He won’t do it again.”

Rin  nestled her head into his hand , a deep sigh escaping her lips.

Sesshomaru could see the exhaustion in her; despite her instance that she was fine,  the stress still impacted her.  Carefully, Sesshomaru slipped his arms under her legs and behind her back. Rin took the  chance to snuggle close to him, her eyes closing again and her nose pressed against his collarbone. She didn’t protest or fight, but relaxed into him.

“I like this…”

He paused, taking the chance to look down to his wife.

“Oh?”

“I feel safe,” her hands  touched his chest, “and warm.”

Sesshomaru looked down to her , studying her tired face.  No one had called him warm before. His fingers pushed her hair off her face, Rin watching him with tired eyes . Long fingernails ran over  the soft skin of her cheek before it made her way down her neck.

“Get some sleep,” he told her, lowering his lips to the crook of her neck, “you’ve had an eventful day.”

She hummed in agreement , feeling warm blankets settle on her arms and around her body. Her husband sat with her  a moment longer, his hands lingering on her  side before he got up  to get ready for bed himself, his mind spinning the whole way.

Naraku w as being more and more  forceful around him and Rin, and Sesshomaru knew it was only a matter of time before he involved other members of his family. Rin was strong, and though she seemed shaken from earlier today, Sesshomaru could see that she wasn’t willing to be shaken . But how many more incidents could she take? There was no telling how far he was willing to push  someone, and now that Rin was in his sights…

The demon’s  hand curled into an angered claw at the thought.

Naraku was not hurting Rin; Sesshomaru was unshaken in  that resolve. But the question still remained; why now?  For Naraku to  lash out like this something had to change to make him more  desperate, but what? It made little sense to Sesshomaru, and that made him  irritable.

As he returned to his already sleeping wife, Sesshomaru slipped under the covers beside her,  pulling her close and  drinking in her scent. If he was to keep her safe, he needed to figure out what Naraku was scheming , and fast . He could no longer keep her at a distance , and she was being pulled into this one way or the other. Besides, he thought as he closed his eyes,  now that he knew what it was like to have her close,  it was  the only thing he wanted .


	17. Birthday

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello all! Hope the holidays are treating you well, and I hope 2021 treats you all better then this dumpsterfire of a year (and perhaps finally see SesshRin become cannon in the new year?)!

Light snow cascaded around the quieting city. Lamplighters  had long since illuminated the streets and there were several couples milling about, a few right outside Sesshomaru’s office window. 

He hated going into the city to work, especially when a certain  half- demon as starting t o  become more than a  nuisance . B ut he had one particularly neurotic client that refused to be anywhere near the trees, convinced  there was always someone hiding in wait for him , so he needed to put faith into the staff to keep Rin safe.  Sesshomaru  begrudgingly  went to spent the day in town with him, going over every insignificant detail until it was well past closing hours. Fortunately, Jaken was incredibly loyal, and refused to let  his Master work late alone.

“Lord Sesshomaru!”

The demon lifted his head from his last few pages to his eager assistant , his brows furrowed.

“ Your wife is here to see you Sir.”

Confused, Sesshomaru looked up to his assistant, now noticing the young woman standing behind the imp, casually looking out of the large windows.

“Rin.”

She looked up to the sound of her name. Her face was calm, hiding the nervousness Sesshomaru sensed in her. She was dressed  beautifully ,  burgundy  skirts around her booted ankle, her  deep  red  wool  coat not holding a spec of lint on it and her hair was neatly piled on her head , a gold pin holding back the elegant curls.

“You were running late for dinner,” she explained, “I wanted to see if you were doing okay or if we needed to cancel.”

“Some of the figures are taking a little longer than expected,” Sesshomaru explained, “I ’ll be finished soon.”

“Okay,” Rin nodded, “I’ll just wait out here then.”

The young woman didn’t complain as she sat back down in one of the waiting chairs, her purse wrapped around her waist. Properly, she crossed one ankle over the other, shooting him a gentle smile before she deliberately looked  out the window again, watching the happy couples walk around .

Sesshomaru meant to move away, but stopped  to look back at his wife waiting patiently for him, and the demon knew that she’d wait as long as it took.

“Rin.”

Brown eyes saw her husband step aside, the door still in his hand though he was out of the door frame.

“Come in.”

Standing, Rin said nothing as she entered his office, Sesshomaru closing the door behind her.

“Have you ever been in your father’s office before?”

“A number of times,” Rin nodded, “but my father conducted a lot of business  from home and his office was in a warehouse.”

“Indeed?”

“He ’s a trade merch ant,” she reminded him, stepping hesitantly from the doorway, “he liked seeing what happened and when, what was going through his routes, who was supplying it…” her head turned to look at the rich wood, black metal sculptures, and walls lined with shelves. “His office was more bare wood and metal, nothing like this.”

Sesshomaru watched as she walked around the office, looking through his many books. It was her first time in his office in the city, and it was apparent she was interested in where he worked.  She’d been into town a handful of times with him, but he never thought to take her around here ; h e’d always assumed she’d be bored .

Having her sit outside of his office while he worked was not the way for him to treat his wife. Not that having her near him made his work go any faster or any easier, but at least she wasn’t forced to sit outside like a scolded child. She took some time with the books, flipping through diagrams and figures she didn’t understand  in the slightest while Sesshomaru made the decision to put off a few pages and give them to Jaken to take them home for him to sign later.

“How has work been?” 

She  still wasn’t comfortable with silence. Then again, Sesshomaru was finding her chatting normal , and he was somewhat glad she  was still the little girl he’d fallen in love it.

“Long and tiring,” Sesshomaru told her, returning to his notes, “though it is almost over.”

“That’s good!” Rin said, “ guess I came at the right time! I remember what you said about the markets closing and I was happy I got the timing right—” she paused, “I’m doing it again… aren’t I? Talking about things I don’t really know  and just going on and on—"

Amber eyes flicked up to her before back down to his writing.

“It’s fine,” the demon murmured .

Rin didn’t seem to know what to say to that.

Jaken ran in and out many times, taking documents to and from Sesshomaru’s office, pausing every now and then to give Rin a look before he pattered out of the room. One time the demon caught Rin sticking her tongue out at the imp  before she quickly closed her mouth. 

“You have a lot of first editions,” Rin commented after a few minutes had passed , her fingers tapping the spines.

“Gifts, mainly,” Sesshomaru murmured, “I am a hard man to buy for, evidently.”

“Well what do you get the man who has everything?” Rin teased.

Sesshomaru said nothing as he looked up to the young woman, standing on her tip toes to reach a maroon volume.

“You’ve settled on a dinner.”

Rin paused, her fingertips around the book and her heart in her throat.

“Oh.”

She slunk back down to her  heels, unsure of what to say to her husband.

“Did you think I didn’t know it was my own birthday?”

“I knew you knew,” Rin murmured, “but… you wanted nothing to do with it… you wouldn’t let me get you a gift or-or  do anything for you,” she swallowed thickly, “so I thought I nice dinner would do…”

Sesshomaru looked his wife up and down, her standing there in her nicest coat and shoes and hair perfectly styled. Underneath the deep red  coat  was her best dress, taken out to impress him and those around him.

She really had thought of everything.

“Rin.”

Big brown eyes turned to look up to him, widening as his lips met hers.

“Thank you.”

Rin seemed to melt slightly  at his touch. Softening slightly, she  dug around in her purse, pulling out a small box with a red bow.

“Happy Birthday ,” she smiled , holding it out to him.

The demon looked down to the gift she’d given him. It was small, fitting easily into the palm of his hand . Glancing to her, he slowly opened the box, surprised by the present.  He looked down at the  elegant suit pin.  It was small; silver with topaz in the center , and there was intricate metalwork surrounding the stone.

“I… I know you have nicer pieces and all,” Rin said, pulling the pin out from the  cushion,  “but my father insisted that I give it to you.”

“Your father?” the demon asked , letting her stick the pin to his lapel.

“My mother gave this to him during their courting period,” her hands stayed on his chest, “now… he insisted he wants you to wear it ,” she smiled up at him, “don’t worry… you don’t have too if you don’t want too.”

Sesshomaru’s hand slowly came to cover hers , his eyes never leaving hers.

“Thank you.”

Her hand came to his arm, her reaching on the tips of her toes while she planted a kiss on his markings.

“Happy Birthday, Sesshomaru.”

The demon looked down into her big brown eyes. She held nothing but sincerity and honesty in them.

Her expressiveness was one of the reasons he fell for her.

“Sesshomaru?”

He couldn’t help himself.

She squeaked as his lips covered hers, his arms now around her back and neck, holding her close and bringing her to him.  Rin  hugged him back, and the demon could feel her relax in his arms.

“Sesshomaru…” Rin couldn’t seem to find her voice for a moment, “we’re… we’re going to be late.”

He pulled back , looking down at her who fit so comfortably in his arms he never wanted to let her go.

“Sesshomaru—”

“I’ve had a long day,” he told her, “I’m not exactly in the mood for a large party.”

“I wasn’t going to throw you a large party…”

The demon tilted his head, Rin seeming slightly confused  by his assumption.

“The dinner was exactly what I told you,” Rin  said, shrugging , “just you and me, in a private room with dinner.”

Sesshomaru straightened up,  his coat now  over his arm.

“Or,” Rin stepped back to the demon, Sesshomaru not trying to keep his distance this time, “we could go home, and I could make you something.”

“You know how to cook?” Sesshomaru’s brow rose at the implication.

“My mother had some family  recipes she insisted I know,” Rin shrugged , “it’s not… well it’s not as  _ great,” _ she went  red for a moment,  “but it’s… food…”

“You’ve already made the plans, ”  the demon slipped his arms into his  coat,  “ l et’s  be off,” Sesshomaru said, his hand on her back and walking with her out the door.

The dinner was indeed what she said; they were in a private room with no large surprise party. It was peaceful for the two of them,  doing nothing but drinking wine, eating , and talking casually. There were no interruptions, from family or others,  and Sesshomaru was grateful for the  peace.  Rin seemed to do her best to keep it that way, trying not to talk too much , but it was obvious it was hard for her. He appreciated it never-the-less ,  but was finding her  chatting now more relaxing than anything.

They left without any sort of dessert,  Rin observant enough to know he hated sweet things.  Their ride home was just as peaceful , Rin’s hands never leaving his .

“Happy Birthday, Sesshomaru,” Rin said, leaning on his shoulder and looking out the window.

He pressed his lips to her hair, drinking in the scent of the hair oils . Slowly, he lifted his fingers to pull her  gold pin out of her hair, and let it fall down free .  He slipped his fingers through her long locks,  his eyes on Rin surprised face.

“You prefer it down, don’t you?”

To answer his question, she snuggled closer into his chest with a smile.  Taking the opportunity, h is two fingers hooked under her chin and pulled her face towards him. Slowly, the demon lowered his lips to hers, Rin tasting the remnants of  wine and steak .

“Thank you,” Sesshomaru said, “for my birthday.”

“You’re welcome,” Rin smiled, “I’m glad you liked it.”

They didn’t speak a whole lot as they travelled home , and they arrived to an equally quiet house.

“ Your father ’s gift is on the table in the living room ,” Rin said as she pulled off her coat , “and there’s no one around the corner about to jump out and surprise you.”

Sesshomaru  still peeked around, relaxing when he saw no one and nothing but a crackling fire and  a bottle of rather expensive cognac.

“Father always does  know the best places,” Sesshomaru turned the bottle around in his fingers, “I’ll have to thank him ,” he turned back to her, “why didn’t you?”

“Why didn’t I what?” she joined him  in the living room.

“Plan a large party , ” he  finished , replacing the bottle on the table , “isn’t that what you like?”

“But it’s not what you like,” Rin said simply, “and it’s your birthday… so… it should be what you like … shouldn’t it?”

Sesshomaru was still amazed by her simplicity. He watched her step up to him,  her fingers around the moon and sun ring on her index finger.  She lifted up on her tip toes to kiss him , her fingers around his marking . Slowly, the demon slipped a hand behind her back and his fingers unconsciously started to slip between the  strings that held her corset closed. 

Rin didn’t resist as her hands came to his jaw and her fingers ran under his ears,  the demon tilting his head to let her  more access. He moaned quietly, enjoying the feeling of her fingernails on the back of his skull.  The young woman was learning things about him he didn’t share with anyone else, and  the feelings it dredged up confused him. 

Taking a break from their kissing , Sesshomaru slipped off his suit jacket, Rin taking a chance  and pulling off his necktie and then starting on his  shirt’s buttons. The black jacket landed on the  cushions of the couch while  he  returned to his wife. Rin accepted him again,  her hands  moving from  the buttons to his opening chest.

“My Lord!”

The demon really did wonder if he should  start locking Jaken in his room.

“Yes,” Sesshomaru hissed, Rin leaving his arms and taking a step behind him with her hands keeping her corset to her chest.

“Um…” Jaken seemed slightly uncomfortable now , looking from one to the other.

Groaning, Sesshomaru stepped towards Jaken , Rin taking the moment to pull the  corset  strings just a little tighter while the two demons engaged in conversation. She glanced to them every now and then ,  coming to sit on the couch. Her heart started to sink a little at the sight of Sesshomaru beginning to button himself back up. 

“Alright; I’ll be in in a minute,” Sesshomaru told him, Rin suddenly perking up at this.

Sesshomaru approached her, sighing and rubbing his temples.

“Um…”

“I’ll be working late tonight,” the demon said, picking up his suit jacket and digging around for the keys to his house.

“You can’t work tonight!” Rin protested, “you already worked late! And it’s your birthday! ”

“It doesn’t stop because of my birthday, Rin.”

“But— ”

Sesshomaru gave her a look that suggested she not continue  the line of protesting.

Pouting, Rin looked up at him, for one last attemp t to try and take the night off work.

“Sesshomaru— ”

“ This is nothing new, Rin,” the demon turned to her, key to his office in his hand .

She looked up at him, really wishing  she could look a little more intimidating. There was nothing she could say that would make him take the night off , even for his birthday . Even when they were doing that. Her heart sank a little; coming second to his work was something she expected when she married him, but it was starting to hurt more and more. Taking a deep breath, Rin looked up to her husband , and got a really stupid idea. There was nothing she could say, but maybe there was something she could do.

Without a word she snatched the key from his fingers and  slipped it into the front of her corset.

“Go get it,” Rin said simply.

She’d never seen him looked so shocked in all her life.  He just stared at her before glancing down to her chest.

“If you can’t get into your office, you can’t work,” she  put her hands on her hips , “ so, go get it.”

For the first time in his life, Sesshomaru was a loss for wor ds.  In a way, she ’d outsmarted him. Rin was more observant than he gave her credit for; she ’d heard, on more than one occasion, Jaken complain  bitterly that he was not allowed a key to Sesshomaru’s office . While it did mean that if the demon lost possession of his own key he was locked out ,  Sesshomaru was always a very careful man , and it meant no one could move or take anything without him knowing.

Right now,  Rin was making him question whether him having one key was good idea or not.

She sat on the couch cushions, her hands on her hips and her chest sticking out. It was very apparent she was proud of her  idea , though she was trying to keep a stiff  face  about the whole thing.

Him suddenly moving on her surprised her .

“Sesshomaru! Wait! Stop!”

He had her in his arms now, her back to his chest and his fingers  dancing around her sides.  They fell onto the couch, h er feet started to kick as  she couldn’t help but laugh and giggle at his tickling.

“Se-Se-Sesshomaru!”

The demon couldn’t stop the small smile that fell on his lips at the sound of her laughing.

“St-St-Stop!” Rin laughed , “I-I’m ticklish!”

Sesshomaru instead buried his nose into the crook of her neck , inhaling  deeply and listening to her laughter .

Six months  ago he’d have just demanded his key back and walk away . Then again, six months ago she’d never have  been close enough  or bold enough  to take it from him and would have just sat and let him do his own thing.

When Rin turned around, she found her face very close to his. 

Without missing a beat her hand  slid behind his head and she brought him in for another kiss. His hand slid up her  chest , fingers splaying over the  embroidery while he cradled her neck in the crook of his elbow. It was an awkward position , but neither one of them felt any pain or stiffness.

“ Thank you.”

Sesshomaru sat up, key in his  fingers and his wife left lying on the couch.

“Cheater…” she pouted , turning over to lie back on the couch.

“You asked me to retrieve it, and I did.”

He stood now,  striding over to the entrance of the living room.  The demon paused for a moment, turning back  see Rin still on the couch . Her black hair was hanging down over the edge of the cushions, and  it was slightly mussed thanks to his tickling and then their kissing. She smiled at him when she noticed him looking, and the demon could feel his heart miss a beat.

“Jaken.”

Rin watched him call the imp over and speak to him in low tones. Curious, she  raised her head slightly , watching her husband speak and then move to hand something off to Jaken. She was surprised then, when he returned to her with his hands in his pocket.

“I ’m too tired,” Sesshomaru answered her unasked question, “think I had too much wine at dinner.”

“Alright…” Rin couldn’t help put smile at this .

A part of her could tell he was lying, but she knew better than to call him out on it. She stayed where she was, and watched him  walk back to the couch.

“Maybe you should get an early night,” Rin suggested behind a teasing smile, “since you’re so tired and all.”

Sesshomaru tilted his head , his fingers  flicking her bangs off of her face.

“Would you care to join me then ?”

Smiling wider , Rin sat up , her head coming to rest on his shoulder.

“Sure ,” she stretched,  liking the  warm feeling in her chest at the thought that she wasn’t coming second,  “think I had too much wine too ,” Rin pulled back, “um… your father does want to see you … for your birthday—”

“I don’t know if I’m ready for that large a celebration,” he looked down to her .

“What we did really wasn’t a celebration,” Rin pointed out, “it  was just a quiet night—”

“That’s all I wanted,” he lowered his lips to her hair, “ thank you.”

“You’re saying that a lot more,” she said suddenly , looking up to him.

Sesshomaru paused. It was true, he was saying it more and more , but only to her.

“How else will you know I’m grateful?”

She hugged him tightly at this,  standing after a moment before she walked with him to their bedroom , her smile  immovable even  as she slept soundly in his arms , making the demon’s world seem a little brighter.


	18. Sango's Birth

Sango and Miroku’s house was eerily quiet and dark, very much unlike the parties the young man liked to throw. The demon paced the lonely living room, occasionally glancing to the room upstairs where the heavily pregnant woman had stopped walking around and was now on the bed, screaming through the pain. 

Sesshomaru was unsure as to why he was called, but he suspected it had more to do with Rin than him. 

Kaede had been called by Kagome in a panic, and she insisted that Rin and Sesshomaru join the old woman. Once in the home, elderly nursemaid set to work, ordering people around and demanding fresh towels and warm water. Sesshomaru stayed well out of everyone’s way, staying in the living room and occasionally checked in on by Rin who had been turned into Kaede’s assistant. He heard the mumbles and the talking turn into screaming and crying. 

And then screaming and crying turned to silence. 

He didn’t pry, but his ears told him that, while Sango had delivered the first twin fine, there was something wrong with the second. Both mother and child were fine for now, but Kaede was demanding as few people as possible be in the room. 

Kagome was in with Kaede, talking to Sango while InuYasha stuck close by Miroku. Sesshomaru finally ascended the stairs, but kept away from a clearly concerned Miroku. It was weird to see his brother try and be the voice of reason, but then again, it wasn’t a role he was suited for either. Evidently, it was a trait their father never handed down to either of them. 

Sesshomaru took the silent cues and left everyone to themselves. He would do nothing but make the room uncomfortable, and he was observant enough to know this. 

Where was Rin? 

He wandered the house a little more, following his nose towards his wife. He found her in what was the nursery, the walls painted a pale blue and the twin cribs set up on opposite sides of the room, with a wide window hidden behind white curtains. 

“Hello you…” 

Sesshomaru stopped as he looked in on the young woman tenderly cradling the babe in her arms. 

She was standing by the crib, warm white cotton draped over her arms and wrapped around the tiny infant. Her hands kept the neck supported, and her fingers seemed to rub the tiny chest. Her back was to the door, and by extension, him. 

“Aren’t you a beautiful little girl,” Rin whispered, “yeah? Your sister is giving mommy some troubles, isn’t she?” she rocked the baby gently, “don’t worry; everything’s going to be fine.” 

Amber eyes watched her gently rock the small infant, Rin’s smile different than the ones she usually gave him. It was so soft and gentle, and it was mirrored in her eyes. Her body was relaxed and the baby in her arms seemed comfortable against her chest. He crossed his arms and leaned against the doorway, watching the calm scene for as long as he was allowed. 

She just looked so happy. 

Rin started to hum a few notes of a song he didn’t know, swaying in time with the song. Her voice wasn’t always in tune, but she still sang beautifully. He remembered every time her father tried to get her to sing to guests she’d always run and hide. She might not be an operatic singer, but her voice was lovely. 

“How is she?” 

He spoke in low tones, grateful that he didn’t startle her. Sesshomaru hated to interrupt the scene, but as he strode quietly in and had Rin turn to him, the sight of her with a small bundle made his heart quiver. The air of peace and calm stayed around her, and Rin seemed like she was a completely different woman. 

“I think she’s good,” Rin said, “don’t really know a lot about babies… surprisingly.” 

“What do you mean—” 

“I mean, a lot of people seem to think women are automatically experts on babies,” Rin pointed out, “I’m afraid we only know what our nannies teach us.” 

He walked up behind her, looking over her at the now sleeping baby, her face scrunched and the small mop of black hair peeking out under the white cloth. Rin’s smile returned as she looked back to the baby, her body gently swaying as she rocked the baby. The demon’s hands found their way to her hips and her head rested on his chest. 

Sesshomaru found Rin’s silence surprising, but there was also comfort in it. She somehow seemed older now, more mature. There was still the little girl he’d grown to love, but something more, something that made him fall in love with her all over again. 

“Is… Sango okay?” Rin asked, “I haven’t heard anything—” 

“Kaede is an experienced midwife,” Sesshomaru said, “and Kagome has a surprising amount of medical training for a Lady. She’s in good hands.” 

“Oh,” Rin seemed to relax at this, “thank goodness…” 

“She’ll be okay,” her husband tried to reassure her, “her and her second both.” 

“Poor Sango… and poor Miroku,” she looked back to the door before down to the little girl, “but mommy will be okay,” she tapped the tiny nose, “and then you and your sister can make her work extra hard.” 

“How do you mean?” 

“Twins are just… well, they’re a lot, aren’t they?” Rin said. 

“Sango will be fine,” Sesshomaru told her, “she has staff to help her.” 

“And… what about Miroku?” 

He found it interesting she’d mention the young man. Perhaps it was because of how she grew up, or maybe it was how close she was to her own father. 

“Him too,” the demon said, “though, he might not be the most help.” 

“As long as he’s there for the three of them… isn’t that what counts?” 

Returning to studying her, Sesshomaru saw a sadness in her face. She wasn’t ignorant to her situation, especially down here, and she knew she had been fortunate child to have an involved father. He squeezed her a little tighter, feeling her against him soothing. 

“I’m sure Sango’s nanny—” 

“She’s not using one,” Rin said, quietly interrupting him. 

“No?” 

“She asked me about it, since I wasn’t raised by one.” 

“Your mother didn’t use one?” 

“She refused,” Rin said, “liked having the maids fine, but she refused to pass us over to a nurse maid,” she smiled at the little girl, “she did it all by herself…” 

“Hm…” 

Rin paused with the baby in her arms, glancing to the demon watching them. 

“Do… Do you want to hold her—” 

“No!” 

She seemed surprised that he took a step back, and the demon now looked uncomfortable with his sudden outburst. 

“I… I am not good with children,” Sesshomaru admitted. 

“It’s not hard.” 

Taking his hands, Rin got close to slip the tiny creature into his arms, her hands bringing his arms to support her neck and head and keep her safe. 

“There… see?” she looked up to him with that soft smile, “just hold her like that.” 

Amber eyes met her brown before he looked down to the baby, the muscle in his jaw twitching. 

“And if she wakes up? And begins screaming?” 

“Babies do that,” Rin shrugged, “it’s annoying, and not fun, but it’s what they do,” her hand stayed on his arm, “you’re doing fine.” 

Sesshomaru felt his jaw tighten; he was used to doing better than fine. The baby felt awkward in his arms, and he looked from his wife to the child. Rin kept her hands on his, silently encouraging him while talking calmly to the baby. 

What would it be like, with their baby? 

The thought made his stomach tighten, but he was grateful for the sudden screaming so he didn’t need to confront it. 

“What—” 

“Sango is giving birth to her sister,” the demon gestured to the baby, “it’s a good sign.” 

“Okay,” Rin breathed, grateful that the baby was still sleeping through the process, “eh?” she tapped the little baby’s nose, “you and your sister will be back together soon…” 

He saw how happy Rin was being around the baby, and he knew that she’d be the involved mother; preferring to spend her days with her children rather than hand them off to nannies or nurses. She’d probably want the father just as involved as she would be; would he even be able to live up to her expectations? Sesshomaru had been raised by boarding schools, nannies, and private tutors. He’d never been around babies and he’d always avoided children; he wouldn’t even know what to do with his own. A part of him expected that he’d give his own children his childhood. 

The demon caught Rin watching him when he was lost in thought. At first, he assumed that Rin was making sure the baby was okay, but then he realized there was something she wanted to ask him. 

“What is it?” Sesshomaru asked. 

“Just… I’m expected to give you an heir… aren’t I?” 

A question they both knew was coming. 

They never talked about it much, since neither knew how to start the conversation. Though it wasn’t like it wasn’t proposed to them everywhere they went. Rin always made herself scarce at that point, and Sesshomaru managed to steer the conversation away to any other topic. Still, the two never brought it up in private. 

But that didn’t mean he didn’t know the answer to her question. 

“No.” 

Rin looked up at him in surprise, taking a moment to study him. 

“What do you mean no?” Rin asked, “isn’t that my duty?” 

“You must think me exceptionally cruel to want to force you to have my children.” 

It was obviously not the answer she was expecting. 

“It’s not your responsibility to have my children. That’s not what you should live for.” 

“Sesshomaru—" 

“I… heirs are something I’m expected to have, yes,” Sesshomaru admitted, “but… not having them isn’t a failure on your part.” 

“It’s sill my responsibility,” Rin said, looking back to the small infant and taking a deep breath, “and… if you don’t want a child… why did you get married?” 

It was an honest enough of a question, and one Sesshomaru couldn’t honestly answer. It should be easy, shouldn’t it? To admit that he’d been in love with the little girl from the North. So why was he such a coward about it? 

He gently handed back the squirming baby to Rin, the young woman gently starting to rock the squirming child. 

“If you wish to be a mother, you’ll do it on your own terms,” Sesshomaru said, “when you’re ready.” 

Rin studied Sesshomaru a moment longer; when would he start making sense to her? Would he ever? 

“Doubt any of us are really ready,” Rin murmured, turning back to the child, “eh? Yeah… no one’s really ready…” 

“Neither am I…” 

The couple turned to a rather exhausted-looking Miroku. His hair was out of his small ponytail and hung limply around his face. 

“Hey,” Rin smiled to him, “how is she?” 

“Sango’s up and out of the woods,” Miroku seemed relieved to say that, “may we…” 

“Of course,” Rin handed the small baby back to Miroku, “here she is…” 

“Hello you…” 

Rin smiled as she watched Miroku walk off with his eldest. It was only then did she notice her husband’s hand on her shoulder. 

“They’re kinda cute… aren’t they?” 

Sesshomaru looked down to her, noticing the sadness was still on her face. 

“I suppose,” he admitted, guiding her out of the nursery. 

The two joined the rest of the group, including a very exhausted Sango. She was invested in her daughters, as it should be. Kagome and Rin both taught Miroku how to hold his new daughters, and InuYasha and Sesshomaru watched from a distance. When the troupe left, it was late into the night, and they all seemed exhausted. Parting ways with a quick hug to Kagome, Rin set off with her husband. 

They returned home late, and neither one wanted to speak much about it. Rin didn’t even bother to change alone, and already started to take off her corset and skirts, preferring to let Kaede have the rest of the night to herself. She’d worked the hardest out of them all, and the Lade of the House had given her the week off to rest. 

“Rin.” 

She paused pulling off her corset, tired eyes turning to look at him. 

“Do you want to be a mother?” 

She straightened up at this, his amber eyes intense and studying her. Rin’s fingers slipping on her nightgown, and thought about what he was asking her. 

“Yes.” 

The demon slipped his arms around her, pulling her close to him. Maybe it was because it was what society expected of her, but a part of her really did want to have a child of her own. 

“One day,” she said, “and… maybe it’s because of obligation… but… yes, I want to be a mother… even if it’s just to one.” 

Sesshomaru’s lips pressed to her hair, a new wave of guilt ripping through him. 

“Let’s get to bed,” Sesshomaru said, “it’s late.” 

“Yeah…” 

Rin didn’t argue or pursue her line of questions any further as she climbed into bed, resting on her side and her face turned away from Sesshomaru. It took a little longer, but eventually, he managed to fall into a restless sleep. 

He woke suddenly, groaning at the darkness. Sesshomaru breathed out slowly, his eyes searching the darkness of his room. Shuffling slowly, the demon sat up at the sound of someone moving in the room next to his. He got up, wrapping his warm robe around him, and moved to investigate the sound. 

The door slid smoothly open to a woman in her white silk robe with her arms around swaddled cotton, humming a little tune he didn’t know. Big brown eyes smiled softly down at the tiny infant who was reaching up for her, and fatigue was overshadowed by her joy. The smile turned to him when she noticed Sesshomaru at her door, and the demon watched her walk slowly towards him. 

“You want daddy, don’t you?” Rin whispered to the tiny child, “yeah… you want your daddy…” 

Sesshomaru felt comfortable having the child slipped into his arms, Rin staying close as he looked down to the baby, smiling softly at the sight of a gummy smile reaching up for him. He lowered his nose to the tiny fingers, closing his eyes at the cold touch of the tiny fingers on his cheekbones. 

“Sesshomaru…” 

He felt Rin’s hands on his arms, but didn’t want to be parted from his child. Not now. 

“I love you…” 

Her nose was to his cheek, and her lips pressed against his markings tenderly. 

When he woke next, it was to a bright room with his wife dressing for the day. He sat up, trying to ignore the pit of disappointment in his stomach, and instead tried to set his mind to the day ahead. 

“Sesshomaru?” 

He looked to Rin, who was already dressed for a fairly casual day. 

“Do… do you want to be a dad?” Rin asked, “not a father… a dad.” 

The phrasing was not lost on him. He paused at this, mulling over her question before he caught her waiting for his answer. While his dream the night before did not help his mind, what made his answer was the worry in her eyes. 

She was terrified of him doing what he’d always done, brush her question off and leave her to wonder. Knowing her, she’d think the worst, not that he’d given her much reason to think otherwise. The only thing she deserved was honesty, and it seemed it was the only thing he was incapable of giving. 

“Yes.” 

It was obviously not the answer she expected. Sesshomaru saw surprise morph on her face and she didn’t seem to know what to say. 

In truth, he was exhausted trying to keep her out when all he wanted was to keep her close. He had no idea how to be a father, especially the involved one she wanted, but there was no way he could be one if he kept her, and eventually them, at a distance. Rin deserved to have the father of her child give nothing but unconditional love; could that even be him? 

“Sesshomaru?” 

Her fingers slipped in his hand, and gently squeezed. 

“Um—” 

“That doesn’t mean I know how to be one.” 

It was odd for him to admit his uncertainty. But there was a comfort he had around her that was unlike any other he’d known. 

“That’s okay,” Rin smiled, “I don’t know how to be a mother either.” 

He closed his fingers around hers, knowing she was better than she thought. After all, he’d already taught him to be better for her.


	19. Mother

“What are you reading?”

On a cold day Rin looked up to see Sesshomaru walk into his library , an oddity given that he was normally working at this time of day.  Rin herself was lying back on the couch, immediately pressing the book to her chest.  Her days were still very much the same , and she didn’t complain too much about it. However, she was starting to grow more and more excited  for the spring. 

“A book o n plants,” Rin turned the cover over in her hands, “ I want to make sure everything’s ready for spring.”

“I see,” Sesshomaru said. 

Without a warning,  Sesshomaru reached into the book and pulled out a second, smaller paperback. His brow raised, he looked down to Rin who was deliberately looking away from him.  She knew that most people hated  upcoming romance novels, and her husband didn’t seem to like them much either.

“I got bored,” she shrugged, reaching to take back her romance novel, “what’s wrong with these sorts of books? They’re entertaining! You should get more for your library.”

“They’re drivel at best, and put silly ideas in people’s heads,” he said, striding past her and towards his bookshelf.

“They’re fun!” Rin insisted, standing up and following him, “and what’s wrong with escaping the world for a bit? It’s all just fantasies anyway,” she watched him thumb through his shelves, “what are you looking for?”

“ My book o n  land ownershi p with regards to bogs and swamps ,” he continued to look through the spines, “I usually keep them in my office but I must’ve rearranged them …”

“They’re up on top.”

Sesshomaru turned to look at her, her head jerking towards the volumes of books he’d put up there only  two week s before.

“I spend a lot of time here,” Rin admitted, going to grab a ladder and pull it  to him, “it’s  one of the red  book s , right?”

“They are… yes.”

Sesshomaru made his way up the ladder, held steady by Rin. She was right, of course, and he managed to find the registry easily. When h e looked  down, he found her hands extended up, a smile on her face .

“Jaken will yell at you for taking his job,” Sesshomaru said, handing her the book all the same.

“He’s not here, and I am,” Rin brought the book to her chest  while Sesshomaru descended , “how much more work do you have?”

“A bit . Are you thinking of planning something?” Sesshomaru took the book back.

“How about another ride? Ah- U n’s getting antsy again and he likes you. And  Bakusaiga would like some more time out of the stable ,” she suddenly got fidgety, “ and ,” she took a deep breath, “maybe… we could talk about… what happened over the holidays?”

The demon paused now, taking a moment to look up from his book with his tongue flicking over his lips. They hadn’t really talked much about it , though it seemed Rin was starting to grow more and more bold in asking for what she wanted.

“Look… Rin—”

The library’s double doors  burst open , surprising them both. Rin and Sesshomaru turned to watch a beautifully elegant demon striding towards them , smile on her lips and hands open wide. Rin’s eyes widened as she saw the face of a woman she’d only ever seen  in  portraits .

“Ah! Sesshomaru!”

“Mother…”

“Mother!?”

Rin looked from one demon to the other, now feeling severely underdressed in the presence of those two.

InuKimi was a striking woman, who  was dressed in nothing but the finest of furs and wools . She wore a wide hat tilted at an angle and her hands were dressed in dark red gloves. Her dress was cinched tight  and was a mixture of purple and white and her heels were high and polished till they shone. Rin watched her with fascination, noting how none of the portraits did her justice.  Rin gripped the front of her mustard yellow dress, really hoping one of the holes she’d seen in it weren’t that noticeable.

“My dear son!” she spread her arm wide and brought him in for a kiss on his cheek , “how are you?”

“ Well, mother,” Sesshomaru said, rather stiffly, “ what are you doing?”

“I was in town and thought to stop in to celebrate your belated birthday!”

“It was almost  a month ago,” Sesshomaru pointed out, letting himself be brought into a hug.

“Hence the belated,” gold eyes now turned to Rin, “and this is my new daughter, is it?”

“It’s an honor, my Lady,” Rin instinctively curtseyed low, keeping her eyes on the rug.

“Lovely to meet you too,”  InuKimi pulled Rin up and brought her in for a stiff hug ,  “I’m sorry I couldn’t attend the wedding,” she pulled back, “I’m afraid I was out of town…”

Rin nodded, swallowing and trying to not feel so intimidated in her presence. Sesshomaru didn’t speak of his mother much , from what she’d heard, the woman was a perfectionist and  held the highest of expectations for those around her. She was a well-travelled independent woman, and was more than happy to live as such.

“Why are you here?” Sesshomaru was asking her.

“I came to see my dear son and his new wife; do I need more of a reason than that?”

“You should call first.”

“Waste of time,”  InuKimi brushed off, “ is family not welcome?”

“Mother—"

“Why don’t we go  into town and have lunch?” she  said suddenly, looking from the demon to his wife, “Sesshomaru can catch up when he’s done with work.”

“Mother—”

“Come, Rin; let’s get you dressed in something more fashionable,” without waiting for Rin’s response she gripped her upper arm and pulled her towards the library door , “I have outfits for you.”

“I-um— ”

Rin stumbled as  InuKimi dragged her towards her bedroom, surprised when she found the king-sized bed covered in beautiful dresses and  corsets and accessories.

“Now…  _ these  _ are the up and coming in the fashion world!” InuKimi grabbed a dress from the pile and  put it up to Rin’s chest, “and  _ you _ ,” she walked over to the dog demon that had followed them, “this is girl time; you go… do… work, or whatever it is you do.”

“Mother—”

The door was shut in his face, leaving the demon on the other side and Rin alone with his mother. Stunned, Rin looked from  her mother-in-law to the door, wondering what power  InuKimi held over her son to be able to get her way so easily.

“Now… let’s try this on.”

InuKimi worked quickly, pushing the young woman around and pulling very expensive clothes out to hold against Rin’s skin, her humming and throwing the fabric that just wouldn’t do.

In the end,  Rin felt rather uncomfortable in a slightly tighter than usual corset  and a  deep purple dress. Her feet were squeezed into some higher heels and a black hat adorned with beautiful gold butterflies was perched on  the side of  her head. Matching black gloves and a swath of brown fur over her shoulder s completed the whole look.

“Come along my dear,”  InuKimi pulled Rin along, “lunch awaits.”

“ Sh -Shouldn’t we wait for Sesshomaru—”

“He’ll be too long,” the demon woman guided her carefully down the stairs , “there’s only so much time for lunch!”

“Not that long, mother.”

Sesshomaru  was  still  at the bedroom door, his arms crossed and his face tight.

“Long enough that we’ll have to wait,”  InuKimi continued to pull Rin to the stairs, “ come  come ; time is precious.”

Rin looked up at him, genuinely more worried than when she was  first  venturing into high society .

“Rin! Come along now!”

“Sesshomaru—"

“Enough! Mother!”

Now the demon stood between his mother and the stairs. His face was set in a frown, and he was standing tall.

“Now really!”

“You can’t just barge in  like you always do,” he informed her, “ you should have let us know you were coming—”

“ Rin doesn’t mind! Do you?”

Rin really hated having both sets of eyes on her.

“I… well, no but—”

“See?”  InuKimi tried to push  her son aside, “now—”

“But may I have a moment with Sesshomaru?” Rin asked when her mother-in-law  took a rare breath, “ just… to talk about  your accommodations for the night?”

“ _ Fine! _ ”  InuKimi huffed, throwing her hands up, “a moment with Sesshomaru, but then we  _ must  _ be off.”

Rin nodded , letting her saunter down the stairs with her head held high. It was the first moment she had to take a breath, which was  made difficult given her new dress. Sesshomaru seemed just as exhausted by the woman’s appearance.

“What is happening?” Rin whispered, looking from one demon to the other.

“Just… she’s like this,” he pressed at his temples, “it’s best to just go along with her and give her what she wants…”

“But-But I wasn’t expecting to go out today! And-And  if you’re not going to be there—"

“She just wants an hour with you—"

“I’d rather spend an hour with Naraku,” Rin whispered , “why can’t you come now ?”

“I have  a meeting ,” Sesshomaru seemed frustrated by it now,  “that she knew about.”

“You knew she was coming?”

“No,” he shook his head, “but she often asks about my schedule in case she wants to drop in. She  hasn’t done it till now though … ”

“So… what am I supposed to do?” Rin asked, terror in her eyes.

“Just… I’ll be fast, and I’ll ride even faster,” he paused, “she won’t hurt you.”

“But  what if I  disappoint her ? ”

Sesshomaru pulled back at this, watching Rin, usually able to find every bright spot in the  darkness, seem to want to curl in on herself and hide away . His mother was almost impossible to impress , and Rin  wanted more than anything to  impress everyone around her. The demon looked back to the stairs, knowing his mother would be  up any moment. In truth, he didn ’t want to leave her alone, but his meeting could not be left to anyone else. And he strongly suspected his mother planned for that.

He tucked a stray hair behind her ear , pulling her eyes to his.

“You can’t disappoint her; you’re not that person ,” he murmured, “ I’ll be there soon. I promise.”

Folding her lips, Rin  nodded, knowing there was no way should could  do to get out of this lunch. She accepted his kiss, and pulled her furs tighter around her. Making her way down , she found a rather impatient  InuKimi fanning herself in  the doorway, made more peculiar given that it was the middle of winter.

The two women arrived to a restaurant  that Rin always felt uncomfortable visiting. It was posh, and very high class , with polished marble, shining gold, and with high windows that looked down on the people below them.  InuKimi never stopped, walking through the door and gesturing  to the men around her to care for her firs and coats . They were led to a table set perfectly for three, and Rin was now desperately trying to remember which fork and which spoon to use and when.

“Madam.”

“ We’re here for lunch ,”  InuKimi never once looked  to the man who pushed the chair into the table , “and a glass of champagne each.”

“Straight away ma’am,” the waiter bowed low before he headed off.

“The champagne here is excellent,”  InuKimi insisted, “does Sesshomaru take you out much?”

“Oh yes,” Rin said, “ mainly to parties, not so much restaurants, but I like the peace out there so—”

“Wonderful!” the demon smiled up to the  man pouring them their drinks. “Do you like champagne?”

“Uh…” Rin looked to the  bubbles in the flute that was placed in front of her,  “I don’t  really  like to drink wines—”

“No?” the perfectly plucked brow lifted, “are you pregnant?”

“What!? No!” 

Rin’s hand went immediately to her lips, hoping she was not too loud with her assertion.  The other diners  didn’t seem to  notice, and they were busy with their first of many courses.

“I just…  don’t like to drink is all …”

“Pity,”  InuKimi sat back, “I was wondering if I might get a grandchild or two soon …”

The young woman just stared at the spot on the table in front of her. In an attempt to distract herself, Rin smoothed out the invisible  wrinkles in the  napkin in her lap. She just didn’t have the heart to tell this woman her own son wasn’t sexually active with his wife.

Their first courses arrived in a timely manner,  and Rin didn’t seem to  make too many blunders. She continually turned to the door, hoping Sesshomaru would come soon. Before any of the barrage of questions InuKimi had  for her.

“You lost your mother when you were young, yes?”

Like that.

Rin licked her lips , and tried to focus on her plate of cold pasta, her appetite vanishing.

“Yes,” Rin admitted, not liking where the conversation was headed .

“How long ago would that be? Ten years? Nine?”

“ Five ,” Rin swallowed, “ five years.”

“The anniversary is coming up soon, is it not?”  InuKimi took a sip of champagne, “ it’s close to your birthday, if I recall.”

Rin felt her hand turn cold. This really wasn’t the conversation she wanted to have in a fine restaurant like this.

“She died a week before my birthday, yes,” Rin conceded, “ my sixteenth birthday.”

“Which meant you never had a coming out ball like the rest of us women of high society , ” InuKimi sat back, “ how are you adjusting then? Is it hard?”

“It’s different,”  she said, “it’s a lot more intense than up North , ” she paused, “but… Sesshomaru helps… so I don’t embarrass him.”

“Yes… we’re much more fashion forward down here,” the furs around  InuKimi’s neck  was fluffed at this, “ and we like it. Hopefully you can too,” she tipped her glass of champagne  to Rin, “you might need some waist training, but you fit the fashion well.”

“Thank you,” Rin bowed her head,  now noticing how tight the shoes on her feet were, “ I… hope the heels shrink soon…”

“Why ever would you want that!?”  InuKimi seemed offended, “the higher the heel, the more appealing your stride.”

Foregoing any sort of  argument she was sure to lose, Rin instead  decided to thank her waiter that exchanged her empty plate for  a sort of vegetable dish.

“It seems you keep Sesshomaru quite busy these days.”

Now Rin started to feel trapped.

“I’ve barely been able to get an audience with my own son,” the woman laughed, “ if it was just  work I’d understand but _ you _ ,” she paused, “I never thought he’d marry a human .”

Rin  started to fixate  on a tiny cherry tomato , rolling it around the plate . She’d heard this before, but not from her mother-in-law.

“Always thought it’d be a demon,”  InuKimi mused, “like Kagura—”

“Who?”

This she hadn’t heard.  InuKimi paused for a moment, but then settled back into her usual face and  relaxed against the chairs.

“You don’t know?” she pursed her lips .

“We… we never got much gossip up North,” Rin said,  “at least… my father never paid it much mind…”

Steely gold eyes studied her, her tongue flicking over her red painted lips.

“ Never mind,” she smiled, “it’s something Sesshomaru should talk to you about… but nothing for you to worry about ,”  InuKimi looked over Rin’s head, “speaking of!”

Rin kept her gaze downward, ignoring the demon that strode over to them and stood behind the chair between them.

“Apologies for being late,” Sesshomaru said,  kissing his mother on the cheek before he turned to his wife.

“You’re right on time!”  InuKimi seemed overjoyed to see Sesshomaru , “sit down!”

The demon paused , looking from one to the other, clearly questioning Rin’s silence.

“Rin?”

She finally managed to look at him, an odd smile on her face.

“Are you all finished with work?”

“For now,” Sesshomaru admitted, “ but it never stops.”

“It never does,”  InuKimi said, waving the waiter over to them , “but now you can enjoy lunch with the two of us ,” she took another swig of her drink, “and you must dress your wife in something more of the times; she’ll become frightfully out of date sooner than you think .”

“Mother—”

“What? Are you telling me she doesn’t look  beautiful in this?” she waved to Rin, “ this is probably the best she’s looked ,” her head tilted, “am I wrong?”

Sesshomaru’s lips folded as he looked to Rin, who  didn’t really know what to say in this situation.

“ I’ll have a white win e, ” Sesshomaru told a passing waiter .

“So , tell me,”  InuKimi wasted no time, “when am I getting grandchildren?”

Both young adults froze at the question, each  shooting each other glances.

“Uh…”

“Well,” she gestured to the two of them, “ you’ve been married for almost nine months now! By this  time I was  having my third baby shower…”

“Mother—”

“ What?  Your father and I were very fruitful. I expected that quality to be passed to you—”

“Mother!”

Rin found it odd to see Sesshomaru in an uncomfortable situation. Not that Rin was entirely comfortable  with the topic at hand either.

“If you’ll excuse me; I must go powder my nose ! ” Rin wondered if she’d ever grow used to the woman’s spontaneity.

She left the two adults sitting in stunned silence, Rin sitting uncomfortably while Sesshomaru had his head in his hands .

“When the waiter comes back remind me to order a scotch…”

“Think I might need one too.”

Now he looked to her, Rin sitting back and letting a deep breath escape her lungs.

“Since when do you drink stronger stuff?” Sesshomaru asked in low tones.

“ I’d order Opium if it were offered,” Rin grumbled back, “is she always like this?”

“She’s always been a bit much—”

“No; Kagome is a bit much,” Rin whispered,  “your mother is a whirlwind.”

“Then we have her on a calm day,” the demon said,  noticing the worried glance Rin  shot at him ,  “I’m here… hopefully she calms down now.”

Sesshomaru’s prediction only came partially true, as  InuKimi seemed to now split her attention between the two of them, and Rin found Sesshomaru’s interactions with his mother rather stiff and formal. It wasn’t like she was warm either , and she seemed to enjoy the game she was playing with the two of them. He kept glancing to Rin, wondering what had made her mood deflate more and more, though he had his suspicions.

InuKimi insisted on going shopping with them after lunch, and Rin let herself be pulled along.  All the vendors and owners seemed to know her and serve at her beck and call, just how she liked it. Even Sesshomaru was encouraged into a few patterns and styles, his face giving the impression  that he’d much rather be in a meeting with Naraku than here.

The three arrived home much later than either Rin or Sesshomaru wanted, but  seemingly nothing could damper  InuKimi’s exuberance . She demanded Jaken bring them drinks, and Rin got a small kick watching  Jaken scamper around  trying to meet her many demands. 

“I think I’m going to retire early,” Rin said once the sun had set and a fire was started in the hearth. She stood slowly only to bow to her mother-in-law , “it was truly wonderful to get to meet you  InuKimi .”

“A delight to meet you too,”  InuKimi smiled, “ and  if you should ever need anything, please don’t hesitate to call.”

“Of course,” Rin nodded to her,  passing a quick glance to Sesshomaru before she headed up the stairs, leaving mother and son alone.

“How harshly did you badger her?”

Sesshomaru did not waste time nor mince words.

“I didn’t  _ badger _ her,”  InuKimi said, pulling her drink from her lips, “I merely pressed her on a few questions I had.”

“Mother—"

“I’ve never met your wife until today; forgive me for being curious.”

The demon sat back , studying the stylish woman.

It wasn’t that she was a cold mother, and she always seemed to enjoy spending time with him when he was a child. But she was a woman of her own  means, and that meant  managing her priorities a little differently. He highly suspected her eccentricities were a way to keep from thinking too much about the  expectations society had on her.

“She must’ve looked beautiful on her wedding day. I’m sorry I missed it.”

It was an odd comment, and one he did not expect. He kept his head high and poised, just as she taught him.

“What do you mean?”

“You’ve always been terrible  at hiding your emotions,”  InuKimi said, “oh yes, you’re a stoic man, but when you’re feeling something strongly, you show it loud ly . When I said she’d never looked prettier, you made a face that said otherwise. And no one talked about how she looked from her introduction or any other party, so I have to assume it was her wedding day.”

“That… or you’ve spoken with father,”  Sesshomaru said .

“That’s equally as possible,”  InuKimi was unembarrassed, “we still talk; and like I said, I was curious about her… and you.” 

“What do you mean by that?”

“It would seem,”  InuKimi chose her words carefully, “that  your whole world knows how you really feel about her,” he looked back to her son, “everyone except her.”

“You and father only know because you know me.”

“You’ve always been head over heels for her,”  InuKimi said, “every summer you’d wait up all night for your father to come get you and whisk you away up  N orth. I always thought you were just excited to see your father but then when he talked about  the way you acted around her…” she sucked in a deep breath, “you really are as simple as your father.”

The demon stood at this, replacing his glass on the coffee table.

“I need to go check on Rin—"

“I don’t mean to offend you,”  she said to the demon who was walking out the room , “it’s  a compliment; really.”

“Then say it like it is.”

She pressed her lips into a thin line, her expression becoming more serious.

“You didn’t tell her about Kagura.”

Now Sesshomaru stopped.

“You—”

“I thought she knew,” she defended herself , “but… now you have to tell her,” she eyed her son, “unless… you were planning on keeping her in the dark…”

“Mother— ”

“You know better than anyone  how this place works. She’s not shiny and new anymore, and things eventually come out sooner than we want ,” her eyes narrowed and she leaned forward, “t ell her the truth; before she learns the lies. ”

He looked down to his mother, his jaw tightening.  She was right, of course . Rin needed to learn the honest truth before  she overheard a rumor and believed it.

“I’ll be leaving you two in the morning, ”  InuKimi informed Sesshomaru, “you can keep the clothes; consider them my birthday gifts to you both.”

“Rin’s birthday isn’t for another two month s .”

“As is the anniversary of her mother’s death.”

Sesshomaru always wondered how she seemed to know absolutely everything.

“How did you know about that?”

“This isn’t one of those things you can just pass off to an employee,”  InuKimi’s voice became curt, “this will be something she’ll need you for.”

“She needs her father…”

“Sesshomaru—”

“I’ll leave you to your  drink ,” Sessho maru told her,  “I’ll see you off in the morning.”

“Very well,” the demon drew in a  d eep breath . It was obvious she didn’t want to drop the matter but her son was giving her no choice,  “ g ood night my dear .”

Kissing her on both cheeks, the demon bid his mother a fair night and made his way to Rin.

He found her in the bathroom, dressed in a nightgown and  a towel pressed to her feet while she sat on the rim of the bathtub.

“Rin ?”

She lifted her head,  towel in her hand.

“ Is e verything alright?”

“It’s fine,” Rin  hissed quietly as she returned the cold water to her feet , “I just don’t think I’m cut out for the highest fashions is all.”

“Considering I don’t like to pay for them, that’s fine by me,” he said, standing in the bathroom door , “she did say you could keep the clothes; they’re her present to you. For your birthday.”

She paused now, 

“That’s… so generous,” Rin pressed the cloth back to her feet, “I should thank her tomorrow morning.”

“You don’t have to wear them, if you hate them.”

He came in front of her, kneeling slowly and taking the cloth from her. Holding her calf in one hand , he started slowly working the white cloth over  the balls of her feet where blisters had started to take hold.

“I don’t hate them,” Rin searched for the words, “ I’m just…  my feet  _ really  _ hurt…”

“You only have to wear them when she’s around,” Sesshomaru said, “I learned that trick early.”

“How often does she  come around?”

“When it suits her fancy.”

Rin smiled , tucking her hair behind her ear and lifted her other foot to his offering hand.

“My feet thank you,” Rin said , “and… she wasn’t that bad… she just loves you…”

The demon looked up to her, noticing  that odd smile was back on her face. T here was something she wanted to ask but couldn’t seem to find the words.

“Um…”

“What do you want for your birthday?”

Now she stopped smiling. Her birthday was coming up fast, and it wasn’t something she wanted to  talk about. The on ly thing she wanted was something she shouldn’t ask for.

“I… don’t know,” Rin quietly lied, “ I like books… like silly romance novels,” she eyed him teasingly, “ but… flowers are always nice—”

“Do you want to go home?”

A lump started to form in her throat. Taking deep breaths, Rin did her best to keep her emotions down and herself calm.

“We can’t,” Rin looked to the towel, pulling off imaginary lint, “you’re insanely busy and I’m supposed to be here, with you and—”

“I can arrange for us to be  at your home before the anniversary of your mother’s passing; so you can properly pay  your  respects.”

To his surprise, Rin didn’t say anything to this. Her head was tilted down, hiding her face from his.  It wasn’t until he  left go of her feet did she come to hug him.  Sesshomaru felt two arms wrap around his  neck . He was looking down at her crown of black hair, her face pressed into  his chest. Almost stumbling, the demon managed to keep his balance , his arms coming to touch her back .

“Thank you…”

It was in a voice so inaudible even he almost missed it.

“Thank you,” Rin finally looked up to him, her eyes glassy, “ thank you… Sesshomaru.”

He held her a little tighter, burying his nose into her neck. For now, her question was forgot and she was happy just to hug him.  His mother might have a nose for fashion and an eye to read other people, but he wasn’t wrong; who she needed now more than ever was her father . And the one thing she wanted for her birthday was the one thing money couldn’t buy.

She just wanted to see her family again. His mother might call that simple, but it only made Sesshomaru love her even more.


	20. Initiative

Night had already fallen when Sesshomaru  took a precious moment to look out the window.  His workload increasing was not something he’d planned, but as usual, he took it on. Now he was working through a deal  that might give him and Rin a reason to venture North more often , but it would help if her father wrote back to confirm their travel plans. 

The demon  was working longer and longer hours, often coming to bed  to sleep for only a few hours before he needed to be up  for the day’s work. Rin asked him about it, but he only told her that if they were going to leave for her home, he needed to make sure  everything was settled.  Sesshomaru told her to keep herself busy for the trip North, but Rin seemed more focused on the fact that  none of their details had been confirmed.  Her father hadn’t written back in almost two weeks and it was beginning to vex him. He needed an answer, and soon , for her sake more than his. She was going to need her father more than ever, and he wasn’t a particularly attentive husband. He lifted his pen from the paper , stilling .

He thought, not for the first time, to leave her at home when they were to go visit her family. She’d be happier there, away from him.  Why he ever thought he was the husband for her…

“Sesshomaru?”

He looked up to the young woman at his door. She was dressed in a thick  robe; the red velvet draping her  body and tied tightly around her waist. Rin stood with her hands  on the wood, watching him from a distance.

“Did you need something, Rin?” Sesshomaru asked, returning to his  notes.

“It’s late,” she said, slipping into his study , shutting the heavy door behind her, “you should go to bed.”

“I’m still working on this,” the demon told her, “ I’ll go to bed when I’m ready.”

Rin just stood by the door, clearly nervous. She was fiddling with the rope around her waist and was trying to look at something  _ other  _ than him.

“Um…”

“Your father hasn’t written back,” he said , still fixated on his writings, “when he does—"

“I know…”

The demon glanced up to her, wondering what the reason was for her presence. Still not answering his questions,  he stepped quietly to the edge of his  desk, walking around to lean  against the edge of the wood next to him.

“You should come back to this in the morning,” Rin persisted, “I’m sure Jaken wouldn’t mind.”

Now she had his interest. Rin usually never bothered him when he worked , and when she did it was to bring him tea or lunch, and she left when he had a call or a meeting. She never told him to finish up though she wasn’t exactly subtle when she wanted his attention. He knew he worked too much for her liking,  but he was grateful they never fought about it.

“Did you need something, Rin?”

She kept quiet , her lips folding . After what seemed like an eternity, she took a deep breath and met his gaze.

“I’m not a little girl anymore ,” Rin said, her heart hammering in her throat . Slowly, she slipped her finger over his wrist under his sleeve, “and… I am your wife…”

The demon stopped at this.

Rin’s hand settled over his, and he could practically feel her pulse  on his flesh.  Her breathing was clearly something she was focusing on and  there was enough evidence that  this time, she would not let him get away.  He supposed he shouldn’t be surprised by how she was acting, only that it took her so long to do so. But if he were with her in that way, it would ruin her for goo d.

And if he rejected her one more time, it could be her final breaking point.

“Please,” she whispered, “I’m… I’m tired…”

The sentiment was not lost on him.

In truth, he’d dragged it out too long, made too many mistakes when it came to her. She’d done so much for him and this union and he’d only watched her. She’d taken every lead and done the best she could with the limited knowledge she had , and he did nothing with it or about it.

Sesshomaru  slowly  stood, his hands moving to be on either side of her,  his eyes looking down at her.

Wordlessly, Rin swallowed her fear and pulled on the knot that held together her robe, lett ing it  open  to  reveal  nothing.

It was  obvious this decision made her incredibly nervous and unable to  relax. She wasn’t really looking at him, and  her breathing was becoming more and more deliberate. The top of the robe slipped over her shoulder and pooled at her elbows, exposing her bare chest to him. The knot, now looser, was barely holding the  velvet together.

He took advantage of this , tilting his head and capturing her lips with his. She didn’t fight him.  Instead , her hands came to the markings on his cheeks and her fingers touched the curves of his jaw . For the first time, he slipped his tongue into her open mouth. Rin was surprised, bu t kept kissing him back . She wasn’t entirely confident in mimicking him , but she  kept  her lips on his.

He lifted her up onto his desk, Rin gently pushed until her back hit the cool wood.  When he pulled away, s he was left looking up  to him, one of his hands on her hip and the other on her chest. Sesshomaru moved slowly, his hand on the center of her chest  moving to push her wrist up by her head while he slid his long nails under the  velvet and over her thigh. He crept up her  skin, following the curves  of her bod y.

Rin breath hitched and her body jolted  and tensed as his  thigh pressed at her most intimate area. 

“ _ Ah…  _ _ uhn _ _ …  _ _ mmph _ _ … _ ” she did her best to swallow and breathe evenly, the feeling from her lower half making the process all the more difficult.

Her toes were  pointed and curved around his waist, her back arching off the desk and the hand around her wrist was  unconsciously tightening.

“ Shh …”

Teeth scraped over her neck , and his fingers gently trailed down the flesh of her arm. He started kissing and sucking at  the pale skin.

“ _ Hmm… _ ”

She  felt the knot on her robe be undone before both of her wrists were pinned to the table. He said nothing to her as his head lowered to her now exposed chest. Rin felt more than saw his long tongue  run over the valley between her breasts , her skin  moving against his muscle. He didn’t treat one area; he licked and kissed  at her collarbone, around her chest, and then started to move back up to her neck. She tilted her head back, to let him have more access to her skin. Her breathing came in soft sighs and moans, her teeth trying to keep herself as quiet as she could.

He freed her hands in favor of returning to her legs . Rin brought her fingers to her lips, turning her head away from him . She  could feel his amber eyes  looking up at her and  she refused to look at him, lest she lose her nerve.

Long claws ran down her thigh,  squeezing t he smooth flesh as  his hands found their way to the underside of her knees. He was slow as he pulled her even closer still , the robe falling away to reveal more and more skin to him. Fingers found her hips while his lips pressed and sucked harder at the crook of her neck.

“ _ Hah…” _ Rin mewled quietly,  her legs tightening around him.

“Lord Sesshomaru?”

The  squawking voice usually so full of vigor was quiet, but  loud enough that  the couple  suddenly became aware of their situation. Both of them turned to look at the door, now slightly ajar but with tiny hands  peeking out around the edge. His large head wasn’t visible, but  there was no question as to whom had just walked in.

“F-Forgive the intrusion,” it was quite obvious Jaken had seen more than he should have, “Master  Onishi is here for you, sir?”

“Naraku is here? Why?” Sesshomaru straightened up .

Rin  had sat up now , curled into a ball with her arms over her chest , now turning a dark red at the realization that  she was completely exposed. She was starting to put the robe back, and was aided by Sesshomaru’s hand.

“I don’t know  sir; he’s only asked to see you.”

“ Tell him to leave. ”

“H-He’s insisting sir—"

“I won’t be seeing him!” Sesshomaru said .

“That hurts my feelings.”

Rin scrambled to get off the table and duck behind her husband , the young woman now utterly humiliated by the half-demon striding in. Her arms were wrapped around her chest and she felt tears of  embarrassment well up behind her eyes.  Something heavy was  pulled over her shoulders, though Sesshomaru was keeping his body between Rin and Naraku.

“ Well well well ,” Naraku seemed to enjoy himself, “about time, isn’t it?”

“OUT!” Sesshomaru roared,  Rin gripping the back of his shirt.

“No? No room for one more?”

“I said GET OUT!”

Naraku tried to catch Rin’s eyes, his grin like a hungry  jackal .

“ What a pity,” he purred, “ _ finally  _ your husband shows  _ some  _ interest in you and—”

Maybe it was the months of Naraku tormenting him, or the mont hs that he’d spent driving Rin further and further from him, but seeing Naraku standing in his study with a tormenting grin on his face while Rin cowered behind him made something in Sesshomaru snap. At once the half-demon was thrown against a wall, Sesshomaru’s form looming over him and a snarl on his lips . He was completely and entirely finished with  Naraku’s antics , and his arm pressing on the half-demon’s throat said as much.

“Lord Sesshomaru!” Jaken’s squawk went ignored by  the two men.

“Careful now,” Naraku smiled, “I think  your wife would much rather be in my position …”

“ DAMN YOU ,” Sesshomaru snarled , “ DON’T YOU  _ DARE  _ TORMENT HER LIKE THAT! ”

“No? But it’s—”

Sesshomaru ’s forearm pressed a little harder on the man’s windpipe, rage blazing in his eyes.

“You’re done,” Sesshomaru hissed, “with me, with her, YOU’RE DONE!”

“Am I?” Naraku coughed a small laugh, “you’ve said that before… and here  we are!”

“LEAVE!”

“And miss you finally break her? Why—”

“Because if you don’t I’ll ruin you. ”

“Such a threat from a man who’ll have a mistress inside of a year—”

“ SILENCE!” the demon roared, “I WOULD NEVER BETRAY RIN LIKE THAT!”

“No!?” Naraku was laughing now, “ this is an arranged marriage!  You bought her just to— ”

“I MARRIED  _ HER _ BECAUSE I WANTED  _ HER _ —”

“ You took advantage of a situation, same as all of us ! "

“ I __ LOVE HER !”

He didn’t mean to announce it so loudly, but the words seemed to echo in the usually quiet study and none  o f them seemed to want to disturb it.

“Probably  _ not  _ the confession she wanted,” Naraku laughed, “ now I  _ really  _ wish I could have made her mine. Think of how  _ insane  _ it would’ve driven you, knowing she was all mine and there was  _ nothing _ you could do.”

“Go to Hell,” Sesshomaru hissed, his voice quieter now .

“You think just because you love her  that validates everything you’ve done? That it makes your decision s any less selfish?”

“I said go to Hell,” the demon growled , “you’re done tormenting me and her.”

“I’ve barely gotten started,” the half-demon laughed , cut off by the arm pressing tighter on his windpipe.

“You lay one finger on her and they’ll never find what’s left of you.”

“Well aren’t you scary,” Naraku’s smile wasn’t moving , “ almost enough to make someone run for the hills… ”

It was then Sesshomaru remembered where he was and who he was with. He turned slowly to Rin, the young woman watching them  with the robe back over her shoulders and a hand closing it tightly closed. Her eyes wouldn’t leave the two men, and it was obvious  she was processing what she’d just heard.

“Jaken.”

At once the imp appeared, clearly  uncomfortable with what he’d almost walked in on. 

“M-M-M—"

“See  Naraku out,” Sesshomaru said,  turning away from the half-demon , “do not let him out of your sight.”

“Yes sir,” Jaken bowed low to Sesshomaru, “right this wa y sir.”

“Can’t I stay?” Naraku asked, “just for a few minutes more?”

“OUT!”

“Master Sesshomaru has  requested you to leave the premises,” Jaken said, standing as straight as he could, “this way, sir.”

Naraku seemed entirely bemused by the whole situation. He looked from the demon to his assistant,  his red eyes finally settling on R in.

“Have a fair night, my dear,” Naraku nodded to Rin, “remember… this is what you asked for…”

He swiftly slipped out the door, ignoring the eye the demon gave him as he left.  Jaken followed swiftly, clearly wanting to avoid the tension building in the room.  The master of the house then slammed the door shut, pausing for a moment and wishing this had all gone just a little bit differently. Rin didn’t need to say anything , though he knew she would.

Sesshomaru leaned back against the door, breathing heavier than he meant too and refusing to look at his wife.

They weren’t doing well to begin with, and now he’d gone and ruined everything. If he’d just moved sooner, done something earlier,  not been him self —

“Sesshomaru…”

Rin  had moved now, and  was standing in front of him, her arms wrapped tightly around her waist. 

“Are you alright?” 

He almost laughed at the question. Shouldn’t he be asking that?  After what just happened, it wasn’t him that she should be concerned about.

“I’m… fine,” he brushed off, “what about you?”

“I…  uhm ...” she glanced to the door.

“Jaken won’t say a thin g—”

“It’s not him…”

She left the words  hang ,  only serving to  fill the room with more uncomfortable silence. Sesshomaru almost wished she would start chatting about every little thing again, in hopes that th ey  could just go back. But that wasn’t any better, was it?

“ Wh … What did you mean…  you love me?”

He closed his eyes, sighing quietly .

“Exactly that,” Sesshomaru whispered, “ I have since we were young… I did on the day before your mother’s funeral, and I did on the day we married ,” he looked to her eyes, “I do now , and will tomorrow, and will until the day I die.”

Again, Rin studied him. Her brow furrowed in both sorrow and anger . And he didn’t blame her for it.

“Why… couldn’t you just tell me that? ”

“Because you already knew,” he said simply, “you asked me not to  badger you with it—"

“How could I have—”

“Because your father told you when he brought my proposal to you , and you read it  again  in my letter s .”

He made to walk back to his desk, the feeling of unease hardly abating. This wasn’t a conversation he wanted to have with her again. He didn’t want to be told again and again  to give up.

“You… never sent me any letters…”

Now it was his turn to regard her in surprise.

“And… And that wasn’t  what my father offered…” Rin added, “I mean… he said you wrote to him to say you were busy with work when you were supposed to court me—”

“ You were ill that week; when y ou wrote back—” he stopped short as realization washed over him like cold water, “that wasn’t you… was it?”

Sesshomaru wanted to kick himself as he watched her shake her head. He’d really been that blind and stupid .

“Your… your father said that he would tell you—"

“He just… He just told me that  in order for some deals to go through, I was going to have to marry one of the bachelors,” Rin explained, “yours… yours sounded the best a-and I knew you and your dad and-and he said you made it a requirement—" she saw the surprise in his face, “ that… that wasn’t what you said?”

“No…”

The two just stared at each other. Rin seemed to wrestle with every feeling that had come back tenfold since she’d stepped into the house and Sesshomaru was dealing with a rather cruel realization.

He thought it was her way of being nice to him.  He thought she was only trying to be close to him out of some obligation or because she was just a nice person.  For close to a year he’d been walking around like a sour child and let his pride guide him. It wasn’t like the  solution wasn’t staring them both in the face either , he just willingly chose to ignore it .

It was easier to know then to risk being hurt all over again.

“I… have to go…”

Sesshomaru didn’t stop her as she bolted out the door , a hand to her mouth and he could hear her heart hammering wildly in  her chest. He was too stunned to do much of anything at this moment.

All this time he’d been led to believe she knew everything , and she’d thought something different. His eyes looked to the letter in the bottom of his drawer, wondering just how many times  he’d reread what he thought were her words , telling him to give up on loving her, and that she couldn’t care for someone like him. 

He’d given up on bein g with her before things could even happen. All because he willing swallowed lies. It wasn’t hard to figure  out who had played both ends against the middle, and the fallout would be infinitely worse for her.

After all, it was her hero who  had betrayed her. To him, her father was only a relative. 


	21. Confrontation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So happy a lot of y'all liked the last chapter! Hoping I can keep up the momentum! A lot longer of a chapter this time around!

Another beautiful day passed by the study windows as Sesshomaru stared out with extreme disinterest. It had been almost a week since he and Rin had been  interrupted , and almost a week spent without any closure or  conversation.  After the incident  Sesshomaru spent the night in his study, wanting to give Rin her time alone. When he went looking for her in the morning, he couldn’t find her . His concerns were abated when he found a letter from her telling him she’d gone to stay with Kagome for a week or so . Whe never he called to ask, he was told she was doing well. Thankfull y, neither Kagome nor InuYasha pried into what had happened, but he suspected that was more about Rin than him. He found the house empty without her running from room to room, and he desperately needed to talk to her about what happened.

His staff spent the week avoiding him and even Jaken, his ever-loyal servant, preferred to keep his distance. Though Sesshomaru suspected that had more to do with how embarrassed the imp was about walking in on the two of them. Not that the demon minded much;  he was still rather furious that Jaken hadn’t stopped Naraku. The imp would still shuffle in and out, handing him documents and  inquiring about Rin before he would run out the door for fear of being thrown out instead.

Not that Sesshomaru entirely blamed him.

The front door opening and shutting surprised Sesshomaru and snapped him out of his reprieve.  Curious, h e followed the quiet voice down the hall, stopping at the top of the stairs at the sight of his wife taking off her coat.

“Rin.”

He was surprised to see her back so soon. Dressed  in  a pale purple, Rin was surprisingly  well-put together. Her hair was loose down her back and  her make-up w as simple. The clip that held her small side ponytail had small flowers in it , and Sesshomaru remembered it as one of his first gifts to her. She looked up to him for a moment, acknowledging him before she walked towards the living room. The demon made his way down the stairs, following her.

“Rin ; what are you doing back?”

“I have company coming,” Rin told him, barely turning around, “can you please greet  him when he gets here ?”

Sesshomaru stopped at this, watching her slip into the kitchens . He could only guess who she had invited over , and he could only assume it was why she  was so  focused . Her appearance was a shock yes, and though he wanted to talk to her about what had happened the night , he supposed he needed to focus on the day ahead. He did as she asked, finding his servants and  informing them of their  unexpected guest. Sesshomaru then  spent his next half hour waiting outside for his father-in-law.

Despite knowing of his arrival,  Sesshomaru was  still  somewhat surprised by the sight of a massive horse pulling up. Large hooves kicked as the animal reared, straining on the bit with flecks of foam  falling to the stones. Barely waiting for his animal to calm down, Takeo smoothly dismounted  and marched towards the Master of the House. A year hadn’t done much to change him,  and he walked with an air of a man in control.

“Where is she!?”

Sesshomaru raised an eyebrow. The man seemed  angry already , and was clearly not here to play games with anyone.

“I beg your pardon?”

“Where is she? Where is my daughter?”

“ Takeo—”

“That’s  _ Captain  _ Takeo to you!” he threw his finger to Sesshomaru’s face, “now where is my daughter!”

Quietly, the demon stepped aside, letting his fathe r-in-law stride past , Sesshomaru now starting to seethe. Even though the man was a veteran and his relative by marriage, there was only so much the demon could take.

“Rin!”

Sesshomaru followed Takeo t o Rin, finding t he young woman still in  the living room, sitting quietly with  a cup of tea in her fingers , and the rest of the set out on the coffee table .

“ Father…”

Rin stood quietly, but she didn’t move to greet her father.

“What happened!? You said—”

“I needed you here,” she said, “and… you weren’t responding so I had to lie…”

Takeo looked furious at the idea that his daughter would lie to him. In an instant he rounded on Sesshomaru, the demon standing behind his father-in-law.

“Leave—”

“You can stay,” the young woman interrupted her father, looking to her husband.

“I should leave you two alone,” Sesshomaru nodded to the both of them.

“Sesshomaru!”

It was then that Rin moved, only stepping towards  them when Sesshomaru started to move away.

“Please… join us,”  she gestured to the  two chairs opposite the couch she was settled on.

Amber eyes looked from Rin to her father, noticing the man’s frustration hadn’t calmed down . Rin , on the other hand , was quietly  asking him to stay. She  looked lik e she was trying to keep her  emotions in check.

“Alright.”

The demon stepped to one of the armchairs, accepting the cup of tea she offered him. It was weird, for the two of t hem to act as they normally would  given what had happened to them, all thanks to the man who sat opposite the two of them and was now ignoring the cup of tea in front of him.

“You don’t lie to me,” Takeo said coolly, sitting up straight, “I thought you were sick. Or worse.”

Rin sat back,  smoothing out her skirts for a moment before she drew in a deep breath.

“Sesshomaru told me he loved me,” Rin said suddenly.

Both men  now stared at her. Her father’s expression hadn’t changed much, while Sesshomaru was looking from one to the other.

“Did he? ” Takeo seemed in thought,  looking to Sesshomaru , who seemed  just as surprised ,  “ is that why you brought me down here? Because if that’s the case—”

“ Apparently you  already knew… and made sure he didn’t tell me.”

N ow the man took an interest in his tea, reaching for the cup to take a mouthful.

“And why would I do a silly thing like that?” he asked, replacing the cup.

“You tell me.”

Sesshomaru looked from one to the other,  seeing Rin stand her ground and refusing to back down from a man that had survived a rather bloody and dangerous war.

“You lied,” she accused quietly, making her father shuffle. 

It was obvious he didn’t like having his honor  questioned . Now he was starting to take an interest in the cup of tea, swallowing a mouthful  and standing his ground.

“What did I lie to you about?”

“Don’t do that,” Rin shook her head, “you know what you did.”

“I’m afraid I don’t.”

“How about the  pretense under which Sesshomaru and I were married? ”

Again, another mouthful of tea.

“I don’t recall lying about anything.”

“He confessed to you!” Rin said, “he told you he loved me and  you said _ nothing  _ to m e ! ? And then made  _ him  _ say nothing to me!? ”

“That still doesn’t make me a  liar,” her father sat up straighter , “the deal was the same; the details—"

“LIAR!”

Both men were startled by her sudden outburst. Rin  wasn’t a quiet woman by any means, but yelling was not something she was inclined to do. She was a Lady, and she worked hard to maintain that image, even around family. 

“You always said the details make the deal,” Rin said once she’d calmed down a little, “ and his deal, you said, was conditional upon me marrying him. What was the truth?”

Her father kept quiet at this, clearly trying to gauge just how much his daughter had figured out on her own. Impatient,  Rin rounded on Sesshomaru.

“What was your proposal?” Rin asked, heated now, “what did you tell him?”

The demon  met her gaze, knowing this question was coming  ever since Naraku had interrupted them.

“I told him… he could have whatever he wanted. In exchange, you couldn’t be married off, to anyone.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean,” he licked his lips, “ your marriage was never to be made into any deal ; you could marry freely. Who you wanted, when you  wanted. ”

“How did that evolve into—"

“ What does it matter!?” Takeo finally said, “ who’s to say he was being truthful in the first place!? Who’s to say he wouldn’t  just change the deal when it suited him!? ”

“That wasn’t what  you told me,” Rin said to her father , “you told me that  he offered a deal… and that it was conditional upon my hand in marriage. Now he’s telling me that was never a part of it? ”

“You still chose his offer—”

“ But that  _ wasn’t  _ his offer!”

“But it was what I thought yours was.”

Both Rin and her father turned to look at Sesshomaru now.

“ He took what I said  to you, but when he came  back he told me no matter what I offered, you  were already in talks to be married ,” Sesshomaru said,  “ you said if I was serious, it would have to be to me.”

“That’s it? ” Rin whispered, “t hat’s all it took? ”

“ A name came up  that… it made me realize you could be  given to someone who might hurt you,” Sesshomaru admitted, “ so yes… that’s all it took.”

The demon hated the  expression of pain Rin had on her face. She looked utterly betrayed, but by whom it was difficult to discern.

“ So t hat’s it,” Rin whispered, looking back to her father, “he was willing to give you whatever you wanted  and you took th e chance to …” she sucked in a deep breath, “you  took the chance to sell me like a cow…” she hiccoughed, “you promised mom…”

“I promised your mother I’d find you a good husband,”  Takeo  defended himself , “and I did—"

“How can he be a good husband when he can’t tell me how he really feels, because of  _ you _ !”

“That wasn’t what she meant when she said a good husband…”

Takeo licked his lips , clearly uncomfortable with the current situation and  his daughter confronting  him . It didn’t help that Sesshomaru was glaring at him.

“Your mother… she wanted you to marry above… above us,” Takeo said, “the Takahashi’s… they were about as far out of our class as I could get—”

“So it’s all her fault?” Rin pressed, “her fault that you couldn’t tell me? Her fault that  threw his offer away for -for—" she leaned back, “how did you think that was going to work? Was he never going to say it? Were we never going to talk about it!? ”

To this her father eyed Sesshomaru, both men not liking the situation but for vastly different reasons. 

“That’s  not the sort of man he is,”  Takeo said after a moment , “ he’d much rather lick his wounds…”

“ Well, that just solves everything, doesn’t it ? ” there was a bitterness in her voice that came from a very ugly place Rin didn’t know she had, “y ou just didn’t want to look like the bad guy selling off his daughter for a deal,” Rin spat, tears in her eyes, “ you wanted it to be all his fault, is that it!? D o you know how much I  love you? What I was willing to do for this family!?”

“It’s  _ because  _ I knew what you were willing to do for this family ! ? ” her father stood, “I  knew the characters down here! Even if I said no you might still strike a deal on your own! And then what!? You’d be gone! ” he pointed to Sesshomaru, “you heard him! There are people who would have hurt you! And you were too innocent to  discern any sort of threat!”

“ So it’s my fault then!?”

“Rin—”

“ What!? Did you think I’d grow to hate one of you so you figured better him than me? Or is it because of me? Did you think I was  _ that  _ stupid! ”

“Rin—"

“Why couldn’t you have just let him confess to me!?” Rin was sobbing now, “ why did you make it sound—”

“Because if he had  you’d have been gone! Just like that!  I knew how infatuated you were with him a nd if you thought he really loved you I never would have seen you again— ”

“ And then , what , have me live in absolute misery until I came running back to you and then you’d trade off to the next highest bidder!? Or would I have this newfound appreciation for you!? Worship the ground you walk on!? ”

“Never! Rin—”

“Then what!? What was the  _ point _ !? To make me suffer!? ”

“I didn’t want to lose you to  _ him _ ! "

The air seemed to grow even heavier at those words. He now had both Rin and Sesshomaru’s full attention and they both seemed stunned to hear those words come from  Takeo’s mouth.  Huffing, Takeo flopped back into the chair, running his hand through his hair.

“He…  did come to me… begged me not to let you go to anyone,” he swallowed, “ he said he’d give me whatever I’d ask him if I never agreed to arrange a marriage to another … but I knew you’d been going around to others to see what you could do and I knew you were  close to agreeing to something , so I told  him… if it came from  me he never would have accepted it so yes, I said you offered this but then I asked you! I made sure to ask you!”

“And you knew I would say yes ,” Rin sniffed, “since I’m a dumb little girl  who’s too stupid to see anything other than a handsome face, is that it?”

“He wanted to keep you safe! And I was afraid now the idea was in your head you wouldn’t stop even if there was a deal already in place ,” he swallowed, “ yes, I knew regardless you’d pick him above the others but…  look… I kept  what he said from you because I knew it would color your choice—”

“It’s  _ supposed _ too!” Rin yelled, “stuff like that is  _ supposed  _ to change my mind!”

“You were so infatuated with him you wouldn’t have  seen if it was a lie or not,” Takeo retorted, “ why would I add to it!?”

“Because you were  _ never  _ supposed to lie to me!” Rin said, “you  _ promised _ !”

“I didn’t lie— "

“ No!?  What do you call this then!? ” Rin asked, “ miscommunication!? ”

Takeo was looking from one to the other, breathing a little harder than he meant too .

“If you didn’t want me gone at all, you shouldn’t have even offered!”

“ I-I—look—” the former Captain took a deep breath, “ when I heard what he said…  h e- h e said he loved you! So I-I just… well I didn’t expect him to accept it, did I?”

“What  _ did  _ you expect!? Why offer something like that if you didn’t expect him to accept?”

“I  _ didn’t  _ think,” her father stated,  “but we’re here now so—”

“ _ We  _ aren’t!” Rin snapped, “Sesshomaru and I are! But you!? You get to go home!” Rin’s voice caught at the mention of her home, “you get to leave this mess you made behind! For us to sort ourselves out! Both  of us stumbling around in the dark with you holding  the light ! ”

“You-You  don’t have too. You  can come home with me now—”

“Why?” she shook her head, “ why would I go back with you!?”

“Because I can fix this—”

“You  _ broke _ this!”

Rin was  breathing just as hard as her father was ,  trying to calm herself down.

“That wasn’t all you told him, was it?” Rin suddenly asked her father, “what else?”

“Nothing else—”

“ What about that letter?” Rin sniffed, “you said something. You’re the only person who can forge my hand.”

Now Takeo looked stunned. He eyed Sesshomaru, the demon  keeping quiet. Trying unsuccessfully to get more comfortabl e, Takeo folded his lips .

“If you say you don’t know what I’m talking about I will throw you out of here myself,” she hissed dangerously , “now—"

“I… I told him…  the letter told  him that you were only marrying him for the  family… not for love … and that you didn’t want him to badger you with those sorts of things.”

As if the revelations of the day weren’t shocking enough , this made everything worse. Rin closed her eyes at this , looking up to keep her tears back in her eyes.

“How could you do that?” Rin whispered, “to him? To me?” she looked to Sesshomaru,  “ i s that why… you were so distant?”

Sesshomaru’s  hand was pressed to his lips, staring off to a space on the rug , listening and drinking in what Rin was saying. Occasionally, he’d roll his wedding ring around using nothing but his thumb. Now, he looked to his wife , taking a deep breath.

“I thought he told you the whole truth,”  Sesshomaru admitted, “when  I learned you didn’t care for me in that way… I let my pride get in the way. I thought  if  you were doing this entirely under obligation , I should respect your wishes … though, I suppose I wasn’t entirely wrong about that,” she looked down at this, “I thought you were already forcing yourself to do so much that I didn’t want to add to it… I suppose it only served to push you away, and hurt your further,” Sesshomaru  sat tall, swallowing and then, “for that… I am sorry.”

“So… this whole time…  you thought I knew,” Rin was shaking now, turning back to her father “because you played both ends against the middle… w hy would you do something like that? W ere you  _ trying _ to chase him away from me ?”

“I -I—look,” her father swallowed, “ a mistake was made, but it can be fixed now— ”

“ BY WHO M !”

Both men jumped at the volume of her scream . Rin stamped her foot in anger, her hands balled into  fists by her side.

“FIXED, BY WHOM!?” Rin yelled, “your solution is to take me home and leave him here!”

“Rin—”

“You’re the reason we’re in this mess!” she  said, “if you had just been  _ honest _ like you’re  _ supposed  _ too—"

“What does it  even  matter!? He wouldn’t have loved you—”

“YOU DON’T KNOW THAT!”

The cup Rin had picked up to try and steady herself shattered when she threw it to the floor.

“You don’t know what he would have said or done . You don’t know how it would have gone .  _ I  _ don’t…  _ he  _ doesn’t…” she sucked in a deep breath, “do you understand how you’ve hurt us? Do you  _ care _ !?”

She was calmer now, breathing slower and trying to process everything.

“This is  my life you are playing with!” Rin said, “ did you not  _ once  _ consider that!?”

“Of course I did—”

“But it didn’t matter to you.”

Rin was rubbing her temples, taking in deep breaths.

“Would you have even  _ let _ him court me!? Or would you have found some excuse to send him home? Bar him at the door? ”

“I would have— ”

“You told him I was ill and you told  _ me  _ he was too busy with work!”

“Why aren’t you mad at him? He agreed—”

“BECAUSE OF YOU!”

Sesshomaru had never heard Rin so angry in all his life.

“I am upset with him too,” Rin admitted once she’d taken in a deep breath , “he should have told me from the start,  promises be damned,” she held her head up, “but of the two? You’re the deplorable one.”

“He’s not an innocent Rin—”

“His hands are a Hell of a lot cleaner than yours.”

“I was a solider—”

“That’s not what I’m talking about.”

Brown eyes narrowed  as she met her father’s  steely gaze.

“What I did I  did for  you ,” Takeo pointed to  Sesshomaru , “but  him ? From what I’m hearing  he’s been cold… and distant...  he doesn’t really give a damn about  you, do es he ?  I was right, he doesn’t love you, h e just wanted  to win — ”

“She is here because she is doing what she could for you,” Sesshomaru  interrupted , “ I couldn’t force my will on her; she doesn’t deserve that.”

“You said—”

“And  her letter said she didn’t feel the same,” Sesshomaru cut him off, “ I care for her, yes ,  so when I was told she was only coming out of obligation to you I thought I should let her be  and let her find  someone else should could be truly happy with.”

“You’d have let me had an affair?”

Now the demon relaxed, turning back to her. It was apparent the news wasn’t exactly painless.

“Or let  you leave this marriage ; whichever made you happier.”

“ So you weren’t serious,” Takeo accused.

“ I thought  she  wouldn’t love me,” Ses shomaru bristled, “ I didn’t want to force her into doing something  that would destroy her world-view. I made the wrong choices and pushed her away, I admit that —”

“So you’re just as bad as me—”

“No! He’s not!”

Rin immediately  jumped to defend Sesshomaru, standing between the two most important men in her life.

“You were the bravest man I knew,” Rin whispered, “I would have done  _ anything  _ for you and for my family… you were  _ never  _ supposed to lie to me or-or trick me—”

“I know…”

Now the soldier softened , his head hanging low.

“I never wanted you to leave me…” he weakly admitted, “ but I knew you had too.  I thought… I just wanted you to keep some love in your heart for me…” 

“You think I’m that fickle?”  her lip quivered , “you are my father…  I was always going to keep you in my heart.”

“Was?”

She took a small step away from him, her heart clearly breaking.

“This… this person… you were not the man that raised me,” Rin said, “you…  you kept up this charade… even on my wedding day,” she sniffed, “you didn’t just lie to me … you kept it up… ” she took in a shaky breath, “ and… my father… he wouldn’t have done this… not to me…”

“What I did… I did out of love for you! Are he and I really so different?”

Rin looked from one to the other , tears starting to stream down her face. The whole time she’d been furiously yelling she’d only shed a few but now they would not stop.

“Yes…”

She didn’t turn to either of them as she made her way up the stairs, hearing her father call her name  over and over .  Rin didn’t care; she just wanted to go back to before all of this.

The demon did eventually follow, and found her with her  leaning against the cool  pane of glass of their bedroom . Her eyes were still puffy and red and she seemed to be keeping an eye on the chestnut animal galloping down the dirt road.

“Your father left,” Sesshomaru said, Rin keeping her eyes firmly out the window and staring at nothing, “are you alright?”

“Is he?” 

Sesshomaru sat next to her, studying the woman who  wouldn’t even look at him.

“He left on his own two feet, if that’s what yo u’re asking ,” he informed her, “ I didn’t throw him out,” he added a moment later.

“You should have…”

Sesshomaru kept quiet at this, deciding not to tell her how her father begged him to bring his daughter back, going so far as to cling to the demon’s jacket  and shake him. The Captain didn’t cry or sob, but he did seem panicked. He left informing Sesshomaru  that he would be back for his daughter.

“You should have told me .”

The demon looked up at her , his jaw flexing tightly. She was right. Heart-broken, upset, angry, and entirely right.

“I  thought I did.”

He handed her a folded piece of paper.  Confused, she took it, and Rin  looked to see  a handwriting that was very similar to her own. It was that damned letter. Slowly, she read the contents, her throat thickening.

There was no compassion in the words for Sesshomaru or what he felt towards her. While she didn’t know what Sesshomaru had confessed,  she doubted  he deserved any of this.

It was blunt and direct,  even starting with  _ I _ _ understand you think you love me _ .  Whoever had written the letter was telling Sesshomaru that, while she accepted the proposal, she did  want to love him, and so he should cease pursuing her.  _ You’re already marrying me, isn’t that enough _ was a particularly cruel phrase that stuck out to her. There were a few competitors, like  _ you’ll never change what you are _ _ ; how  _ _ do you think I  _ _ can love  _ _ something like  _ _ that _ and _ I’ve heard you out, so don’t badger me with it any longer _ . She almost didn’t blame him for how he acted. 

Almost.

“Why…” she asked, finally looking up to him.

“It was written in what I thought was your hand,” Sesshomaru murmured, “ and… I was so blinded from  feeling rejected I just… accepted it.”

“And you still went through with it? After this? ”

“If I rejected the marriage, it would have ruined your reputation … ” he paused, “ and it’s what I thought you wanted.”

She took a few deep breaths, swallowing .

These sorts of marriages were much more common than she’d like to admit, and it wasn’t like the two of them were entirely exempt from  it. But to know her father had lied to her and more…

“I’m sorry,” she whispered, “what my father did… I wish I understood why—"

“ Your father… h e wanted to keep you safe and close,” Sesshomaru said, “I… understand that desire…”

“But you haven’t lied to me,” Rin sniffed, “or… if you did… you didn’t know you were.”

He looked away from her at this. It was true;  he hadn’t knowingly lied to her , but that didn’t mean he was truly better than her father.

“Do you still want to be here?”

Now she had his full attention.  The demon  drew in a deep breath , and  persisted with a question he didn’t want to ask.

“Married to me, I mean,” Sesshomaru asked, “now that you know what you know… do you still want to be married to me?”

Rin felt her heart stop in her chest.

“It would be an annulment… not a divorce,” Sesshomaru explained, “you would be well cared for, and we would keep it as quiet as we could. You wouldn’t need to go back to your father, but you don’t need to stay with me either.”

She didn’t say anything about this, her lips folding and her heart racing.

Did she really want to be here? She was doing all this for her father and her family, because she thought there was nothing  else she could do. To know it was all a lie…

Her father wasn’t entirely wrong; she’d always been attracted to Sesshomaru. Always found him handsome , but always thought he’d be unobtainable ; that they were two people who knew each other and nothing more . To think he actually loved her…

“If… if my father had come to me and said what he should have,” Rin chose her words carefully, “I… I’d have asked you to say it to me yourself,” she looked up to him, “so I want you to say it. What would you have said before all this happened? ”

It was clearly not the answer Sesshomaru expected. He was stunned for a moment or two, but then relaxed.

“I would tell you… that I never wanted to marry a human,” he started, “but when I thought of you being shipped off to some unknown land the idea vexed me more than I thought it would. You were the best part of my growing up and I didn’t want to lose that. I saw it start to happen on the day your mother died. I saw the little girl with muddy skirts and even muddier feet who would laugh about fairies start to fade. I could already see how society was forcing you away from that little girl; and I wanted to keep her around, at least in some sense. ”

“Why?”

“A ll the stress of society, every etiquette lesson, all the expectations I was set to inherit… I’d see you splashing in the river looking for frogs and, for a moment, those worries wouldn’t be there ,” his golden eyes met hers, “ I just wanted to stay in those moments, with yo u, ” he flicked his tongue over his lips,  “ y our father was right; what I did I did selfishly. I can hide behind the veil of protecting you all I want but  it was nothing but selfis h.  I made an impulsive decision and let my  bruised pride decide things for me . I listened to the letter because… I don’t know why ,” he paused, “maybe because it said what  I always thought you would say…”

“You thought I would say this?” Rin tilted the letter to him.

“ I thought you’d truly feel that way about me yes.”

Rin looked down to the note, her fingers tracing the  penmanship. She always thought he’d have more confidence in himself; could this really hurt him that bad?

“Do you regret it? ” Rin asked, “marrying me?”

He studied her, his fingers  twisting his wedding ring.

“I want to say yes,” he said, “but I can’t, because I don’t, ” he looked to  her, “what I regret is not talking to you; face-to-face. I regret not going down to court you regardless ,” he slipped his fingers around her hands, “ I regret pushing you away… only because I didn’t want to hurt. But marrying you? I think that’s what I ’ve wanted my whole life.”

Rin had never seen the expression in Sesshomaru’s eyes. Slowly, she lifted her fingers to his cheek, her thumb running over his markings.

“What made you think I couldn’t love someone like that?”

“It won’t be given freely…”

That was it; what he was truly terrified of , and what he feared he’d already ruined by simply accepting a deal he shouldn’t have.  It wasn’t like she didn’t understand; that’s what she feared her whole life too, but she’d always promised herself to make the best of  a situation like that.

“How do you know if you never ask me?”

Sesshomaru leaned into her warm hand,  seeing her smile softly through her sorrow.

“ Besides… i sn’t a lasting love… isn’t that built , rather than discovered?”

“ I… suppose…” he murmured, “ to tell you the truth… I never thought I’d get to be in love… or  marry you.”

Her husband thought for a moment ; he couldn’t dwell on what he thought wouldn’t happen . It did the two of them no favours.

“Tell me what you want,” Sesshomaru  said , “ if it’s my power, I’ll do it for you.”

With a sniffle,  she turned to look out the window. Her hand fell from his face as she felt the cool metal of her own wedding ring. There were so many things she wanted; the full truth, a fresh start, a proper chance  at this.

“Right  now … I just want my dad back…”

Sesshomaru  took her in his arms  as she curled in on herself and cried. Her father, he one man she trusted beyond all else , had betrayed her . He’d manipulated them both but it was her he’d hurt. The demon’s lips pressed to her long locks as he listened to her sob .

“Please,” she whispered, “please don’t let him take me back…”

“Not if you don’t want to go,” he promised her.

Her hand gripped the lapel of his suit jacket, pulling herself closer to him.

They could only blame her father for so much ,  and despite everything , he was still  the father she loved so much. His  betrayal hurt her more than she could bear .  There was so much they needed to work through, but for now Sesshomaru needed to make sure  Rin  was in a good enough place for them to start. And he was determined to do it with her, not for her.


	22. After the Fight

Sesshomaru moved quietly through his house,  hating how  empty the building had become. Pausing by a window, he looked out at the unusually mild day, with sun shining brightly down  over the melting snow, wishing that the weather was a mirror image of his home.  Her father had returned a few times, as he’d promised, but Rin refused to see him. Sesshomaru didn’t immediately turn him away though, but he still didn ’t let him upset Rin any further. 

Rin didn’t even try to  pretend  to be alright around Sesshomaru anymore . She was listless and tired all the time, and seemed to space out more and more . She’d been sleeping in later and later, but it seemed to be a restless sleep at that. Rin would eat, but not much, and she seemed perpetually distracted.  Her days of crying had slowed, but what was left in its wake was worse.  She was back to the way she was in their first few weeks of marriage.  Sesshomaru hated how lost he felt when it came to her and her emotional state ; he didn’t know what to do or even where to turn . He wasn’t her father, and he wouldn’t pretend to take  that place in her life. 

“Rin?”

He’d walked into their bedroom where Rin had been sleeping alone since  meeting her father. She was still lying there, barely unmoved since she went to bed last night. Sesshomaru thought it would be best to leave her be, though it didn’t  lessen his worries any. 

“Rin?”

The young woman stirred, opening her eyes to see her husband standing over her.

“If my father’s back I don’t want to see him—”

“He isn’t,” Sesshomaru shook his head,  “ mine is . He’s come to join us for lunch , and  he’d like to see you too.”

“Lunch?” Rin groaned, “it’s too early for lunch—”

“It’s half past eleven.”

Rin slowed now, the time clearly a surprise  to her. It was obvious she wasn’t  aware of her own mood or how distant she was being.

“I’ll be down in a minute,” Rin said, pulling off the blankets .

“You don’t need to rush on our account ,” Sesshomaru told her, “I’ll send Kaede in , if you’d like.”

“Sure…”

Fortunately, Kaede  was still very attentive to Rin. Kaede was gentle with her ,  still encouraging to dress presentably and to get out of bed . While the most Rin would do was move from room to room, it was still something. E ven Jaken  helped her . He’d made no comment about what he’d almost stumbled in on, and consistently brought her food and tea, making sure to choose ones  that  would  relax her .

Rin appeared downstairs , presentable for company , much quicker than either Sesshomaru or his father anticipated . She paused at the sight of the elder dog demon , running her hand over her skirt before she came to the two of them.

“Hello,” Rin  curtseyed properly, “it’s lovely to see you again.”

“Hello,” InuTaisho brought her in for a hug, “how are you?”

“I… don’t know,” Rin whispered ,  feeling her face starting to crack .

Her husband looked away at this, and his father watched her start to struggle.

“Come!  We’re starting to have warmer and warmer days , let’s enjoy this one while we can!”

To this  Rin smiled, accepting the demon’s arm and walking with him to the table  in the conservatory , where Sesshomaru had set everything up for the three of them. She took the seat that the eldest dog demon pulled out for her , sitting politely while Sesshomaru took his place opposite her.

“This looks lovely,” InuTaisho commented,  unfurling a napkin and placing it on his lap , “Rin?”

“Oh! Thank you,” she said, accepting one of the smaller sandwiches from the plate her father-in-law offered her .

Sesshomaru watched his father  study Rin. The young woman  was very much aware the attention was one her, but it was painfully obvious she didn’t want to talk much about it.

“Have you been eating well?” InuTaisho asked, watching as Rin  fiddled with her food.

“Yes!” Rin seemed distracted,  “yes I—”

She caught Sesshomaru’s eye , his jaw tightening at her lie.

“Well enough,” she admitted quietly after a moment .

“ I see,” InuTaisho took an interest  in his cup of tea.

“Why are you here?”

Rin’s voice was soft , and it was apparent she wasn’t even going to attempt to hide her exhaustion . InuTaisho sat back, taking in a deep breath.

“Sesshomaru told me… what your father did ,” InuTaisho broached the topic gently, “I’m so sorry.”

Rin pursed her lips, poking at the soft bread .

“How much… did you—”

“Sesshomaru… he told me he was going to talk to your father about the business,” InuTaisho eyed his son, “then… well… Takeo reportedly took Sesshomaru’s deal, and added on the marriage stipulation. Reportedly, that stipulation was from you. But if you’re asking if I knew your father’s  true intention in all of this… then no. ”

She nodded , her breathing becoming less and less steady.

“I’m sorry… he lied to you—”

“I’m not the one hurting.”

Rin fell silent, her brown eyes  becoming distant .

“What did he tell you?” InuTaisho asked,  asking the questions Sesshomaru hadn’t.

“He… said because I was looking, he might as well give me some suggestions,” Rin swallowed, “I thought this was his way of encouraging me. Sesshomaru’s deal… well… it was the best of the choices I had and I knew you two … and my father … he might’ve swayed me… I’m not sure anymore…”

To this she looked to Sesshomaru , the demon still unsure of what to say to her.

“I can’t speak for him,” InuTaisho said, “and I won’t defend what he did ,” he drew in a deep breath, “but… I can  ask how  you are doing?”

“I feel lost,” Rin admitted, “I can’t understand why he did this to me…”

“I suspect he fully doesn’t have an answer to that either.”

The young couple looked to him, Rin in surprise and Sesshomaru’s brows narrowing.

“When your mother died… your father was rather shaken,” InuTaisho said, “ he started… I don’t know… I think it brought everything dark in his life back in one moment. From what I heard—”

“ I found her.”

It was an odd confession , and one neither  Sesshomaru nor his father  knew about it.

“She was just lying on the floor… she wouldn’t get up,” Rin swallowed, “I kept shaking her and she just wouldn’t get up. Father kept staring at her… telling her to stop being silly… I think they had a business dinner to go to…”

“It sounds like he didn’t take it well,” InuTaisho concluded, affirmed when Rin nodded.

“He would say she was the only reason he had a normal life,” she said .

“From what I could see  as an outsider looking in, it seemed his  reality started to crumble when your mother passed,” InuTaisho said gently, “ I don’t think he’d ever fully dealt with the war, not that I blame him , b ut your mother ’s death brought it all back.  He  started making worse and worse decisions, wouldn’t talk to me  or others about it… I think he was trying  to keep his reputation intact while everything else fell around him. But he was slipping; on top of which, he started to isolate himself, with you. Anything you were invited too was met with immediate rejection —”

He stopped when he saw the look of  betrayal cross her face.

“You never received an y invitation s to anything after your mother died… did you?”

Rin shook her head miserably. 

“It makes sense now,” Rin admitted, “ I always… I never questioned it… I just assumed my father would tell me if anything came. When nothing did… we weren’t some noble house… so I wasn’t really surprised.”

Sesshomaru saw her deflate a little more , hating how  disappointed she was. It was apparent her father had done what he could to isolate her after the death of her mother, but he’d done it in a way that  kept her in the dark.

“It sounds like he wanted to  lock you up and throw away the key…” InuTaisho murmured, “I’ll bet he was chasing away every suitor that came  to him. ”

“If I hadn’t been looking…” Rin trailed off, “ I saw him suffering… I just wanted to help, and it was the only thing I could do… so I went looking without telling him. When he found out, ” she bit her lip, “he yelled at me… for the first time since I was a child.”

“You  were doing what you could, just like all of us do,” InuTaisho said,  “it’s not your fault your father reacted the way he did.”

“ His heart… it’s been poorly,” Rin sniffed, “I  think when my mother died… I think he always thought he’d go first…”

Sesshomaru watched her struggle. It was hard for her, to think so ill of her father but to worry for his  health at the same time. As much as what he did  to her was  something she wasn’t ready to forgive, she didn’t want him gone either.

“Your father probably  want ed to see you cared for before he  die d ,” InuTaisho gently cut in, “ I bet when Sesshomaru confessed, he found  a way to make sure you wouldn’t suffer much when he passed , ” he  eyed his son, “but… I think  there was a part of him that couldn’t let you go to anyone, not after he’d lost your mother , and especially because of how much you remind him of her. It must’ve felt like losing her all over again . He’s seen the worst horrors imaginable in this world and saw his wife succumb to them too. H e must’ve thought that would be your fate. S o… he lied , and tried to keep you away from your husband. ”

“That’s still no excuse.”

“It’s not,” InuTaisho agreed , “but your father dug himself into a hole that he couldn’t get himself out of. He wanted you safe and with him but he also wanted you cared f or by a husband who he knew  would care for you.”

“ Both o f those things  can’t be true, ” Rin whispered, “ he didn’t need to drag us in with him.”

She was crying now, tears slowly dripping down her cheeks. Rin dabbed her cheeks with her napkin,  taking in deep breaths.

“ I don’t understand why he wouldn’t just  _ talk  _ to me,” Rin sniffed , “and why he sent that letter pretending to be me—"

“ Sesshomaru probably wouldn’t have listened if it had come from someone else,” InuTaisho whispered , “ and your father… he’s always been in charge. For as long as I ’ve known  him he’s been a stubborn man; and it’s always had to be his way. Unfortunately, his way was split.”

Rin just stared at her untouched food, watching the tea grow cold on the table.

“Excuse me,” Rin said, standing, “I’m… going to go for a walk … I think…”

“Do you need either one of us—”

“Rin likes to walk alone, father,” Sesshomaru quietly interrupted , standing with his wife, “I’ll get your coat.”

To InuTaisho’s surprise, Rin just nodded, standing awkwardly by the table.

“I’m not asking you to forgive your father , you know,” InuTaisho told her, once they were alone, “or even to understand him. But I want you to  be okay; in general.”

“Thank you,” Rin sniffed, “I… I think I will be? It’s just a lot to process… with him and Sesshomaru—"

“ He really does love  you, you know.”

The demon smiled at Rin’s surprise.

“ My son was never subtle around you ,” InuTaisho whispered,  turning  when  said son  returned with his wife’s coat , gloves , and scarf.

The eldest dog demon watched as Sesshomaru helped her into her winter gear before he  walked her  to the back door .  As he rejoined his father, i t was InuTaisho that noticed her look to her husband’s retreating back before she slipped out the door .

“How is she? Really?” InuTaisho asked his son as Sesshomaru sat back down.

“You just saw her,” Sesshomaru said, “ this is a better day.”

Nodding sagely, Sesshomaru’s father turned to his  cup of tea.

“What are you going to do?” InuTaisho asked Sesshomaru, “knowing what you know now?”

“How do you mean?”

“ Come now; h er hero has betrayed her,” InuTaisho whispered, “ the one man she thought she could always count on has let her down —”

“I won’t replace him .”

“ And y ou can’t,” his father shook his head, “ so be her husband. Neither one of you knew what was going on, not full y, you were caught up in this too ,” he paused, “I hope…”

“I was under the impression she knew,” Sesshomaru snapped, offended by the insinuation ,  “that’s what her  letter told me. I would have refused if  I knew what he really did, ” he looked away, “ not that I’m much better…”

Tilting his head, InuTaisho looked questioningly at his son. Sesshomaru, on the other hand, was more contemplative .  He kept thinking that, had things been just a little bit different, he might’ve done something similar to keep Rin safe. It was a chilling thought, but one he needed to entertain if he was to avoid that route.

“I don’t think he knew what he was doing,” InuTaisho  reiterated , intruding Sesshomaru’s thoughts, “not entirely, at least. I think his desire to keep her  with him and  safe spiraled well out of his control. I think it started small ,  keeping her close and watching over her at events,  and b efore he knew it, he was trying to shut her off from the world. You… you’re aware of it now; what you do will decide who you are. ”

“I should have figured it out sooner,” Sesshomaru said, “it was obvious ; she wouldn’t be so cruel, not even to me. ”

“Maybe it’s because it’s  what you  thought she’d say about you.”

Brow raised, Sesshomaru  looked to his father, the elder sipping on his tea casually.

“If you’re going to continue to spout that nonsense, I’m going to ask the universities to bar you from  the ir lectures on Psychology.”

“It’s not the pulp fiction you seem to think it is,” InuTaisho said, replacing the cup, “and it’s not entirely wrong. ”

Sesshomaru shook his head and  reached for his own cup of tea. This was not the conversation he wanted to have with his father.

“How are you?”

Sesshomaru’s brow rose.

“ What do you—”

“She wasn’t the only one lied too.”

Saying nothing, the younger of the two leaned back , crossing his arm s over his chest.

“You like being in control,” InuTaisho sipped on his tea, “ when you got that letter… I always wondered  what was in it,” he mused for a moment, “ but you made your resolve, and you st uck to it. Now that resolve has crumbled,” he looked to his son, “ so? How are you?”

Sesshomaru looked away from his father , staring out at the window and looking  at the footprints Rin had left in the snow. He wasn’t the one who mattered. Not here, and not now.

“I’m fine.”

“Bullshit.”

InuTaisho stood now, coming to his son’s side and putting his hand on Sesshomaru’s shoulder.

“That’s not Psychology, that’s me being your father.”

The  squeeze was more comforting than  Sesshomaru was willing to admit.

“I don’t know what made him pick you,” InuTaisho said, “maybe it was our history, maybe it was the fact that you rode up to talk to her, maybe it was that you said you loved her, ” he tilted his head, “but you must’ve  done something that made him think he could solve all his problems with you .”

“ If he just wanted to keep Rin he could have—”

“I doubt it,” the elder demon  murmured, “she was  looking for a  way to fix his financial troubles ; if his business continued the way it did,  he would have been forced to accept any help or bankruptcy . He saw his daughter slip away , and figured he could keep her close by sending her to  you, and then he lied about why so she  wouldn’t get close to you. He wanted to be the most important man in her life. I’m not saying that what he did was right,” he added quickl y once he saw Sesshomaru’s reservations , “ I’m also not saying it makes sense either. But it’s the solution he  came up with.”

“His solution hurt Rin.”

InuTaisho found it interesting how defensive Sesshomaru grew over his wife . He could feel Sesshomaru tense under his fingers at the thought of Rin suffering. It wasn’t like the elder dog demon didn’t understand his son’s frustrations.

“ I never said it was ideal ,” InuTaisho agreed, “so what are you going to do about it now?”

“Father—”

“The past matters, but you need to be in a good place in the present to examine it ,” the elder said , “ so stop looking for excuses and just be with her. Let her know you, now that your ego can move out of the way and you can quit with this pity party of yours . ”

“Father—"

“You want her to love you,” InuTaisho gestured to the  woods outside, “ she’s already interested in you;  go earn it ,” he paused, “if you want, I can go out with you—”

“I am not a child anymore, father.”

InuTaisho  sat back with a grin as Sesshomaru left him to his lunch. Jaken could be heard pattering around, gathering things for his master and sending him out the door. Bundled in his own coat, gloves, and scarf, Sesshomaru  left his father for Rin, following her footprints through the woods.  He found her sitting against the large tree , her boots on this time . She’d wrapped her coat tighter around herself, but the cold didn’t seem to matter much to her.

“Rin…”

Big brown eyes looked up to him. Her nose and cheeks were tinged with pink , and it appeared she’d calmed down.

“Is it time to come in? Is your father leaving? ”

Rin extended her hand to him regardless, patiently waiting for him to take it and pull her up to return home.

Inst e ad, Sesshomaru sat next to her,  his forearm on his bent knee and his arm against hers.

“No. You can stay here as long as you’d like. ”

Curious, Rin didn’t question  him as she shuffled to sit a little closer to him.

“I still don’t understand,” she whispered after a moment.

“Maybe that’s a good thing.”

“How so?”

“It doesn’t sound like…  I think to understand him you need to hurt like he does,” Sesshomaru murmured, “ he went too far.”

“He did…” Rin swallowed thickly, “I’m—”

“Don’t apologize for him. I don’t blame you for what he did. ”

Rin fell silent , but the sigh didn’t go amiss on Sesshomaru.

The two of them just sat there , breath coming out in faint puffs and the two of them looking out into the thicket of tree s. Eventually, Rin’s head came to his shoulder, her cheek against  the fur on his coat. It was peaceful between them for the first time in weeks.

“Why don’t we go into town next week? ”

It was odd for Sesshomaru to be the one to break the silence between them. Rin looked to him, her head tilting

“ Alright… but why ?” Rin asked , digging through the snow with her heel.

“Because I want to spend some time with you; alone ,” he looked down to her, “and you need to take some time away from this place.”

“I don’t—”

“How else can you heal?”

She  hummed at this, looking back to the  dark trees that littered the property.

“ You’re…  it’s just us… right?”

Sesshomaru felt her arm tighten a little around his.

“ Yes ,” Sesshomaru slipped his arm around her waist , pulling her closer to him,  “it’ll just be for a  few nights. Just us , for you.”

“Okay…” 

Her lips pressed against his cheek , surprising him.

Leaning back against the tree ,  with Rin’s head on his shoulder and the  feeling of her lips still on his markings, Sesshomaru felt  the fading day become a little brighter.


	23. Into Town

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's later than usual! Haven't been as top as I usually am!

Winter was swift to roll into spring, and in almost two weeks’ time the snow had made way to mud and then daring greenery. A carriage rolled down the hill, pulling Sesshomaru and Rin  down into town for their trip into town for the week. They had packed up and set off with a very dejected-looking Jaken left by the front door , the little imp clearly upset caring for his Master’s business for a week alone. 

Surprisingly, Rin remained quiet through most of the trip. Since her father returned home, she’d felt a  weight off her shoulders  and had been able to focus on herself a little more. Given how it was still around the time when her mother had passed, she was still somber and quiet , and almost refused to go in rooms before people . Kaede didn’t chastise her, but instead walked before her mistres s, almost announcing her arrival.

Now, as she swayed slightly in the carriage,  Rin glanced to her husband, the demon looking out his own window.

Growing up, she’d had such a crush on him that she’d do everything she could just to sneak a peek when he came to visit. She thought she was just like every other girl to him. She’d overheard him on more than one occasion talking about how he loathed “air-headed idiots wh o flitted around him”. So why her? What made her so special that he had to keep her safe from the world? 

After their conversation, the two seemed not to know how to breach a topic like this. Which only made their situation that much more awkward. Rin still dealing with the remains of her family and Sesshomaru not one to engage in a heartfelt conversation, let alone start one.

“What is it?”

He  looked to her now , Rin studying him for a moment longer. It made her wonder how much of his attention she really had.

“Nothing,” she murmured, resting her head on his shoulder.

She could practically feel him relax und er her as his body adjusted to her weight. His eyes returned to staring out the window, but the back of his hand was now against her thigh . On a whim, Rin lowered her own fingers to his, feeling the long digits wrap around hers.

When they finally arrived,  Rin took the opportunity to stretch, taking in her surroundings, from the cobblestone streets to the tall buildings.  She looked up to the  townhouse the two were staying at for the  week. While Sesshomaru suggested two days, Rin  requested they stay for a little longer, and he obliged. It was apparently his father’s townhouse, and the two were borrowing it for the time being. 

“Bring them up to our room,” Sesshomaru told the  man who popped out from the doors to greet them before he turned to lead his wife by the arm.

Rin took it willingly, walking with Sesshomaru through the  pristine white halls and gold accent. She looked from the  room to room, all furnishings polished and cleaned for their arrival , and everything in its proper place;  everything was just so posh. Even after a year of living with Sesshomaru, the amount of wealth he had still stunned her.

Which was to say nothing of the room.

They were taken to the top floor of the townhouse , Rin pausing at the sight of the large Master bedroom. It was about as big as their one back home , adorned with burgundy rugs, silk curtains, and a large four-poster bed that sat proudly in the middle of the room.

“Here we are sir.”

“Thank you.”

Sesshomaru turned to talk to the man, probably instructing him for the week while Rin walked through the room only to find her way out to the balcony off the bedroom.

“Wow…”

Rin’s hands found the railing of the balcony, staring out over the  city.

“I assume you enjoy the view?”

Her husband appeared behind her , their  attendant for the week now gone.

“It’s amazing,” Rin said,  “our market cities aren’t anything like this.”

“No?”

“No,” she looked up to her husband who had stepped out to join her,  his hands beside hers on the railing,  “they were bustling, but mostly smelled like fish,” her smile faltered a little, clearly remembering  a happier time with her father.

“Dinner is in two hours,” Sesshomaru said, “you can freshen up and get changed if you like .”

“Thank you.”

She did as he suggested, changing into one of  InuKimi’s less uncomfortable gowns and making herself more presentable. Sesshomaru, too, had changed , looking even more handsome in his suit and pulling his hair back into a  loose ponytail.

Dinner was at a beautiful restaurant , with marble floors and columns, men and women in the highest fashions , all wearing jewelry that would feed families comfortably for years.

“This place is beautiful…” Rin whispered, looking up to the large chandelier above the tables.

Sesshomaru said nothing as he sat opposite her, ordering wine for the both of them.

“My mother would’ve liked it here…”

Now Sesshomaru looked  fully  to her, noticing her fiddling with the ring Sesshomaru had given her at Christmas.

“I think she would’ve admired yours,” Rin said quietly, “she always wanted to be on the up and up on trends and fashions… not that  my father ever cared… always said there was no point in paying for cloth when it was just going to be ripped.”

She trailed off, wishing she could talk about something,  _ anything, _ that wasn’t her family.

“It’s not as fun as you might think.”

Rin focused on her husband, the demon thanking t he waiter that poured them their drinks.

“My mother always insisted that I was to be  in the latest styles, and must never look out of place,” Sesshomaru picked up the glass, “though I felt like that was my  duty… I never cared for any of the fashions.”

“No?”

“I tend to stick with crowds who don’t care for that sort of thing,” the demon explained, “ appearance matters, but trends don’t.”

“What about your friends?”

He paused.

“How do you mean?”

“Well… what did your friends like?” Rin repeated, leaning forward slightly.

“I didn’t have any.”

Rin seemed surprised at this.

“Why not?”

“Being wealthy… most came to befriend me in an attempt to get something from me,” Sesshomaru admitted, “ I learned early not to trust most,” he paused, “but there was an exception.”

The young woman smiled quietly at the implicatio n, hating how her heart fluttered slightly .

“Thank you,” she suddenly blurted out, “for… taking me out here… and not being… you know…”

“ Be what?”

“Well… you know,” her cheeks went red now, “for not… working for a week—”

“ Why would I do that? It’s the anniversary of your mother’s passing.”

And there it was. Finally, out in the open. Rin took a deep breath, finding grief to be an odd thing. The anniversary of her passing was still hard, but growing easier and easier . It was her birthdays and holidays that were more challenging now.

“ Thank you,” Rin smiled to him,  feeling his fingers slip around hers as her eyes grew misty.

Rin was impressed that she could pull herself together in enough time to have a pleasant  meal with her husband. They didn’t linger long, and Sesshomaru had them out and into the cool night rather swiftly.

“Come,”  Sesshomaru murmured , “ we’re safe to walk back .”

“Alright.”

She stepped in time with her husband, looking around at the city all lit up around her. Her mind did drift, wondering how her mother would have reacted to her marriage to Sesshomaru . Rin remembered  distinctly how her mother wanted to have a small apartment in the city, just for  trips like the one she was on now.

“This way,” Sesshomaru ’s words broke into her thoughts and he  guided her towards the pond, “they light it up at night.”

“Really!?”

Rin was excited now, and they walked through the  budding trees together . She looked around at the lanterns strung up around the park path, giving the whole path a rather romantic look as opposed to an eerie one. Sesshomaru watched as she looked to the new buds planted and the few flowers starting to peek through.

“Are you feeling better?”

Big brown eyes met his, her mood lighter now .

“A little,” Rin admitted, “it still hurts…” she looked around, “but this is nice… it helps me forget… for a bit. ”

Sesshomaru hummed, looking  up to the trees and the dripping  water.

“Rin…”

They paused, the demon taking the chance to turn to Rin.

“I—"

“Well… what a surprise ! ”

Rin  really  loathe d that voice.

“Whatever are you two doing here?” Naraku’s ability to step from nowhere was a rather impressive one .

“Lord  Onishi ,”  Rin kept close to Sesshomaru, still embarrassed by what had happened , “what a surprise to see you.”

“What are you doing Naraku?” Sesshomaru asked coolly.

“I was just out on the town and saw the two of you and thought I must see what you’re up too,” his smile flashed in the dark, “so? What are you two up to?”

“It’s a private walk with my wife,” Sesshomaru kept his body between Naraku and Rin, “leave us.”

“Perhaps I can join you this time!”

The implication was not lost on the couple.

“Come now! Don’t be shy—”

Sesshomaru deliberately stepped between Naraku and Rin,  eyes narrowed teeth bared.

“My apologies,” Naraku smiled, “it appears I’m interrupting you two, again,” he turned to Rin, “ give my regards to your father .”

“Thank you for your concern,” Rin managed to get out, Sesshomaru just fuming at the implications.

“I’ll take my leave. My Lord, My Lady,” Naraku courteously tipped his hat to the two of them before he sauntered off, his hands behind his back and head held high.

“Naraku certainly has the habit of ruining a good night… doesn’t he?” Rin asked, finally breaking the silence.

“You learn fast,” Sesshomaru commented dully, “he’s like a parasite you can’t get rid of.”

“And comes up at the worst possible time,” Rin said, “repeatedly.”

Any hope of privacy they might’ve had gone, the two returned to the townhouse in silence, Sesshomaru all but ordering the doorman to not let anyone into their townhouse . Rin left him to his business, slipping upstairs and getting dressed in her simple nightgown . When Sesshomaru returned, he found her sitting in a chair on the balcony, chin in her palm and eyes looking out at the lamplights.

“You’ll catch a cold out here,” Sesshomaru murmured, joining her all the same.

“You were going to say something, before Naraku interrupted us,” Rin said quietly.

“I was,” Sesshomaru admitted, sucking in a deep breath, “I was going to ask if you were going to go through with having sex with me, that night.”

Rin’s shade of red was nowhere near as impressive as it used to be, but it was still impressive.

“I thought we said—”

“We’ll stop talking about it when there’s nothing left to talk about.”

Jaw set, the young woman took his advice, and came inside. When Sesshomaru was in, she shut the door behind them, locking it tight.

“It’s been almost a year, ” Rin whispered after a moment, her voice watery, “and this marriage  _ still  _ hasn’t been consummated. So… I started to wonder… if it might be  _ me— _ ”

“It’s not.”

“You’ve had sex with other women,” she pointed out glumly, “don’t act like you haven’t. But me, your wife? ”

“That still doesn’t make it you.”

“Then what is it? Or… was it?”

Sesshomaru took a deep breath, and left her side to take a seat on the  edge of the bed.

“A man like me was never going to marry someone like you,” Sesshomaru finally admitted, “I was going to be with some cold demon aristocrat and we were going to live in complete misery until the day we died. That was what my marriage was going to be, and that was what I was prepared for,” he looked her over, “but then I got you, and you were a warmth I wasn’t prepared for.  Add to the fact that I received a letter from you that all but called me a monster … and since you were still fairly naïve to the world…”

“I know enough,” Rin quietly defended herself.

“You read fantasies and romances and fairy tales,” Sesshomaru said, “you read stories with happy endings and true romance and women being swept off their feet,” his jaw tightened, “I  didn’t want to take those things away from you.”

“Why not?” Rin asked, fingers fidgeting.

“Because they make you happy in ways I couldn’t .”

Rin’s lip folded at this. True, she loved stories with happy endings and true romance, as cliched as they might be, but that didn’t make her a blind fool.

“Those books… I know that fiction is often based off of reality,” she was choosing her words carefully, “but I’m not an idiot; I know the difference between the two.”

“I know,” he looked up to her,  “ but  I’ve already done so much to you,” he said, “I didn’t want that to be added to the already growing list.”

“We’ve been over this,” Rin stood in front of him , “I knew what I was signing up for when I agreed to marry you,” she paused, “even if that wasn’t the whole story…” 

“Knowing and living are two different things.”

“So is protecting me and infantilizing me.”

Sesshomaru’s head tilted at this.

“You making all the decisions for me isn’t protecting me,” Rin repeated, “you deciding how I should feel isn’t giving me any voice and you not telling me why doesn’t help me make the smart choice.”

Sesshomaru kept quiet, more so out of not knowing what to say rather than social expectation.

“I don’t expect you to explain everything,” his wife stood as tall as she could, “but asking for more than you’re giving me now isn’t a stretch,” she swallowed, “I was raised in this society you know… I know how to handle myself, and I haven’t made too many blunders, I don’t think,” she took a deep breath, “I’m not some maid born with no status that you tricked; I was trained to be a Lady.”

“Rin—”

“I know you want to protect me,” she sat beside him, taking his hand in both of hers, “but you can’t lock me in a cage. I want to live my life. I want to have fun and experience new things and life and-and that means I’ll get hurt yes… but… well… that’s what life is, isn’t it? Good and bad? Sunshine and rain?”

“What if I don’t want you caught in the rain?”

“Then I won’t get to feel the sun,” Rin smiled sadly, “you don’t need to lock me inside… but you can always give me an umbrella.”

“I suppose I’m doing what your father did…”

“I… In a way…” she paused, “but not entirely,” Rin said, “you’re listening to me…” she trailed off, “I’m surprised you’re not angry… about this.”

“I am.”

Her cheek was caught by his hand.

“But not towards you,” he added, “you’re not some social-climber or someone looking to extort money; you made the choice because it benefitted your family. Or, so I thought.”

“I made the choice because I wanted to marry you.”

Genuine surprise crossed Sesshomaru’s face. Rin thought it was an odd sight, but chose to explain herself.

“Any choice I made would have benefitted my family,” Rin said, “but only one offer came from you.” 

“Why?”

“I know I like you,” Rin said, “physically, at least,” she went a little red at this, “but you? The real you? You haven’t let me in enough to know. I said yes because I knew you when we were little, and I liked you back then. You only grew more and more composed and confident as the years went on. You were everyone’s… myself included… idea of perfect.”

“I am far from perfect.”

Sesshomaru gently took her hands in his, holding onto her fingers with his.

“I have been hopelessly in love with a girl from my childhood, and had given up the very idea of being with her before I entertained it,” he lowered his lips to her knuckles, “even though she agreed to marry me, it felt empty and hollow, and I let that cloud my judgement when it came to her and her voice. Instead of talking to you about any of this I just let it fester, and kept you in the dark about everything,” his eyes met hers, “how is that perfect?”

“It’s not,” Rin agreed, “but I’m tired of perfect… or trying to be perfect anyway or living in a world that wants to appear perfect,” she looked him over, “but I know you’ve had to look that way all your life… which is sort of silly.”

“Silly?” Sesshomaru repeated, his brow raised.

“Life… well it’s supposed to be messy, isn’t it?” she looked around, “well, not  _ this  _ messy, mind you,” Rin admitted, “but it’s not perfect.”

“Rin—”

“Is it wrong for that silly little girl you loved so much to actually like you back? Even just a little bit?”

Her husband  seemed stumped by this. It was odd, Rin supposed, that for all the planning and preparation Sesshomaru did  in his life, that something this simple might throw a wrench into his plan.

“I never said she was silly…”

“How can I prove it to you?”

Rin’s nervous energy wouldn’t be contained. She stood up now, walking around the room.

“How can I prove that I genuinely, openly, like you for you? And not because of this situation? What do you want me to do?”

Sesshomaru wa tched her walk around, the young woman looking at him and waiting for his answer.

“Nothing.”

It was obviously not the answer she was expecting.

“You’ve shown what you’re willing to do for me,” Sesshomaru said, “for months you did everything. Now it’s my turn.”

“Sesshomaru—”

“Let me prove to you I was worth that work,” he looked up at her, “but only if you want to stay.”

Rin hated that question. Sesshomaru had made it clear that she wouldn’t be an outcast in society, and that she’d be well-taken care of if they parted, but did she really want to go? It was still one she didn’t really know the answer herself.

Bending over, with her hands on his thighs, s he kissed him. Sesshomaru did push back,  his hand cupping her cheek and fingers starting to thread through her hair.

“Do want to treat me the same way my father did?” Rin asked, pulling back.

“No,” Sesshomaru didn’t even hesitate, his eyes looking into hers.

“Then trust me to make my own decisions.”

The demon studied her for a minute more,  finding her confidence something unlike he’d seen. She still spoke softly and still seemed  unsure in society, but around him she was being unapologetically her.

It made him love her more.

“Alright.”

With a smile, s he  bent back to kiss him again, pausing with her lips just over his. Swiftly , she stood up and  locked the door.

“Naraku won’t interrupt us this time.”

“He wasn’t supposed to interrupt us last time,” Rin commented, “why does he hate you so much?”

“Naraku… I was  once close to his sister , Kagura .”

“Close…” it dawned on Rin what he meant, “oh…”

“The two of us… it was suitable, for the both of us,” Sesshomaru said, “ but I found out she was feeding her brother information,  _ intimate  _ information , about me and my business affairs. Naturally, I was furious, and broke it off with her and her brother, publically.”

“And since reputation is everything around here—”

“Kagura hasn’t been see n since that night; it’s why you two haven’t run into each other,” Sesshomaru said ,  a twinge of shame in his voice, “and when I  broke it off, Naraku’s reputation suffered too; he’s been desperate to return it to where he once was. When he and his sister hung around me, that was easy enough, but when I  humiliated them, everyone else took notice, and broke ties with him too.”

“So… that’s why  he’s been so persistent…”

“That’s not the only thing .”

Rin flopped back on the bed, her black hair spilling on the embroidered  blankets and looking up at her husband.

“When your father’s financial woes made it to us, so too did the knowledge of th e young woman looking to marry to help said business,” his eyes met hers, “this was just after I’d  disavowed Kagura . I’d overheard Naraku speaking loudly about getting ‘a  Northern  jewel ’ who would bring him more respect than money could buy. ”

Rin  looked down at this, feeling her stomach tighten .

“I kept thinking about what he’d do to you if he managed to get his hands on  you,” Sesshomaru murmured, “ I knew your father would see right through him, as would you, but  it still didn’t calm my anxieties. I feared if  your father grew more and more desperate,  he might overlook Naraku’s past and let you go to him.  It’s part of the reason I went to see your father;  let him know the details about Naraku,  and convince him to take the deal to keep you out of harm’s way.”

“Naraku… he’s  dangerous but… it’s not like he’s killed anyone—”

She stopped when she saw the look he gave her.

“When I say Kagura hasn’t been seen, I mean ever,” Sesshomaru said, “I don’t know where she is.  She hasn’t attended any public events, haven’t been to any fashion shows or garden parties; n ot even staff at her house have seen her .”

“You think Naraku killed her? His own sister?”

“I do ,” Sesshomaru nodded, “ and others. Unfortunately, I have no  evidence.”

“Others?”

Rin rolled over to her stomach at this, the demon turning to face her.

“Do you rem ember the old perfumer? The one Naraku kept quiet close too?”

“The one who had a stuffed wolf in her house ? ”

“Her, yes,” Sesshomaru nodded, “Naraku has a habit of getting close to rich, older women , and then once he’s in the ir w ill, the all somehow pass on.”

“ How hasn’t that raised suspicions yet?” Rin asked, “shouldn’t someone have seen—”

“They don’t all die the same,” her husband explained, “some  fall ill and die in their beds, others collapse, s ome have accident s on their property or their horses , and o ne’s locked away in an asylum and he’s  convinced her to give him power of attorney over her estate. It’s raised a few eyebrows, but no one’s been able to  prove anything.”

Rin mulled this over, chewing on her lower lips. Sure, she’d read about people  like this in her novels, but it didn’t happen in real life, did it?

“I couldn’t let  any of  that happen to you ,” he whispered, “I won’t.”

It was a promise, and not one he was about to take lightly.

“ So… what are we doing then?”

Sesshomaru raised his brow.

“How do you mean?”

“I mean… are we going to get in the middle of some wildly complicated hair-brained scheme to  expose him in public?”

Now the demon looked thoroughly confused.

“No,” Sesshomaru shook his head, “where ever did you get an idea like that?”

She shrugged, “I read a lot,” she explained , a small smile spreading on her lips and her chin sank into the puffy duvet,  “it might put one or more silly notions in my head.”

“ Hm …” even he could hide the upward curl of his lips , “regardless of your stories, that’s not what I intend to do,” Sesshomaru said, “ I don’t need to delve into  anything so complicated , and I won’t be getting you involved either.”

“You’re worried for her…”

Now all teasing was gone from Sesshomaru’s face.

“ Kagura is not a woman to just vanish,” the demon  murmured , “ she’s stronger than most women, and never backed down without a fight. Since I don’t know where she is …” he noticed her studying him , “what?”

“Nothing,” Rin shrugged, “just… your mother mentioned her once… something about you two almost getting married?”

“I was never in love with her. Kagura… what she and I had was what was expected of both of us,” Sesshomaru admitted, “and I think she had genuine feelings for me. I didn’t realize how deeply she’d felt until it was too late, and by then I’d caught on to her and her  bother’s little scheme. When I broke it off publically, I think it hurt her more than she let on.”

“And you.”

Rin sat up on the bed now, her fingers in her lap.

“It sounds like you trusted her,” Rin concluded , “why would you  do it so public otherwise? ” she tilted her head, “or be so hurt…”

“Rin—”

“It’s okay to be hurt,” Rin said  quietly ,  coming to lean on his shoulder and wrap her arms around his  chest , “and it’s okay to worry about another.”

Sesshomaru’s fingers  reached to her wrist , his cheek leaning against  her crown. Being close to her never failed to  calm him. It really did bring him back to when he was a young man without all the expectations society had forced on him.

“Thank you .”

Rin straightened up, surprised to hear Sesshomaru of all people say things like that.

“For what? ”

The demon turned to her, his nose touching hers.

“ For being  someone I can trust,” he  whispered before he kissed her deeply , “through it all.”

Rin’s head came to rest on his shoulder, a small smile on her lips. Though it was a small thing, being the only one who heard what he’d said wasn’t nothing to him.

“I’ll keep you safe,” she promised him, hugging him tightly ,  and keeping her arms around him. For the first time in forever, they didn't feel like complete strangers in bed, a feeling neither one was keen on giving up. 


	24. Rin's Birthday

“Here! This one next!”

Rin accepted the gift from Kagome, looking around for the opening before she started to tug at the paper.

After the end of their week away,  Sesshomaru had surprised Rin with a celebration at Kagome and InuYasha’s house. Kagome seemed more than happy to plan the party, collecting presents from the friends Rin had made down here as well as getting the food  prepared  and having a cake made. InuTaisho and Izayoi were also in attendance, both giving her a warm hug and neither one addressing  the absence of her father.

Kagome seemed a perfect party host, making sure everyone, even her brother-in-law, was enjoying themselves.  Full of good food and even better wine ,  the party had broken off into small groups around the living room, Kagome sitting right next to Rin on the couch as she handed presents to her.

“Sango and Miroku send their regards,” Kagome said as she handed Rin another gift, “apparently they’re swamped !”

“They have twin girls! I would be too,” Rin said , accepting the present all the same.

It was  a beautifully decorative  bridle , something that made Rin smile. It was perfectly suited to Ah-Un, as it was  bitless . She glanced to Sesshomaru , giving him another smile. Rin’s fingers put the  bridle to the side,  alongside the other gifts from her family and friends. 

“I think that’s it for gifts,” Kagome hummed.

“We can all just relax for a bit,” Izayoi cut in, her hands on her daughter-in-law ’s shoulders, “I’ll see how dessert is coming!”

With a flurry of skirts and a hug to Rin, the woman made her way to the  kitchens,  letting the groups  mingle and talk amongst themselves.

“So…”

Kagome shuffled closer to Rin, taking advantage of  the  conversations the others were having.

“How is it?” Kagome asked,  glancing to Sesshomaru, “with him.”

“It’s fine, Kagome,” Rin said,  refusing to divulge more than she already had.

“You two are better?” the young woman pried.

“Yes,” Rin nodded, “a lot.”

“Good.”

Rin squeezed back, Kagome  accepting what Rin told her. From what the young woman could gage, Kagome didn’t know too much about the entire situation, and for that Rin was grateful.

“What did he get you?” the young woman looked around Rin, “he didn’t give me a gift to  add—”

“He gave it to me this morning.”

“Oh?”

The coy smile and  tone did not go amiss on Rin. 

“Not  _ that _ !” Rin whispered, gigglin g along with Kagome.

“But you’re not wearing any new jewelry …” Kagome trailed off.

“He didn’t  _ get  _ me jewelry,” Rin said,  digging thro ugh her pockets to pull out an envelope.

Curious, Kagome looked inside, pulling out smaller packages with Latin names written in beautiful script.

“They’re flower seeds,” Rin explained, “he has some landscapers at our house now planning out flower beds and some of the staff are getting the conservatory ready. If I like the designs… then I can start planting them in a month or so.”

“That’s so sweet!” Kagome gushed , handing the packages back, “let me borrow some!”

“I’ll see if I can get them started,” the young woman said, “ hopefully…”

Kagome lapsed into silence with Rin, glancing over to  Sesshomaru, who was in a relatively casual conversation , for them at least.

“So,” Kagome gently breached the  unspoken topic, “Sesshomaru told us he told you about Naraku.”

Slowly pulling the drink from her lips, Rin snuck a quick peek  back  to her husband who was  now  talking to his father about something.

“He did,” Rin admitted , fidgeting now.

“And ? ”

Rin took in a deep breath.

“ I… don’t really know, ” Rin  hated saying that, “I knew he was dangerous… but I didn’t think he’d be a monster ,” she hung her head, “I  hate that my father’s actions might be justified…”

“They weren’t.”

Now Kagome was sitting beside her in more of a comforting manner.

“This doesn’t make what he did  right or justified,” Kagome said, “you’re not a child.”

The young woman leaned into her friend, wondering just how long Kagome had truly been  in the thick of it.

“But his persistence is weird,” Kagome admitted, “he’s always been out to  humiliate Sesshomaru and InuYasha, but he’s not usually  so focused and determined . Maybe Sesshomaru went and  pressed on a nerve he didn’t realize and now it hurts Naraku. ”

“Is it because of me?”

“I don’t know,” her friend shrugged, “maybe he thought he could use you? ”

“Great,” Rin huffed , “he’s already getting bolder…”

“You’re safe here ,” Kagome put her arm around Rin’s, “you can come to us like last time, and Sesshomaru will do everything in his power to keep Naraku away.”

“I know,” Rin leaned into her friend’s side , “but for now, can we just ignore reality for a bit?”

“Okay,” Kagome pulled her tighter, “ and when reality comes back, we’ll still be here.”

“Good,” Rin laughed,  grateful that her friend was willing to hear her out.

Sesshomaru relaxed a little when he saw Rin at ease  with Kagome. The week she’d spent with his brother and sister-in-law had clearly brought them closer, and the demon  was grateful Rin still had someone to turn too.

"How’d she  take it?” InuYasha asked suddenly, sipping his wine and standing be tween his brother and father.

“Better than I expected,” Sesshomaru said, “but given the month she’d had …”

“She’s an intelligent woman,” InuTaisho interrupted, “a little  isolated sure, but not a moron. ”

“I would’ve thought her dad would’ve told her about stuff like this; trying to make this place sound as bad as possible.”

“He probably didn’t want to scare her too bad,” InuTaisho said, “ or maybe he thought it would shock her  into coming home.”

“She’s here now, and she knows now,” Sesshomaru said , “and I’m willing to bet she  _ was  _ told about  dangerous people , but she probably didn’t think they’d be so close to home.”

“She’s a tough young woman; she put up with you for  almost an entire year,” InuTaisho casually commented, ignoring the look his son shot him , “she’s smart enough  to know when to come to you for help .”

“Father—”

“Let her enjoy  her birthday,” InuTaisho whispered , “you can sort all that out at a better time.”

“Sesshomaru?”

Rin surprised him, now standing in front of the demon.

“May I steal him for a moment?” Rin asked, smiling wider when she got an  ‘ of course ’ from  her father-in-law.

She stuck her hand out to  her husband , the demon taking it and following her out the door to the garden.

“Kagome wants me out  of the house for a bit,” Rin explained, “I think she wants to get the cake ready. So , I thought we’d go for a walk. Sorry for taking you away from your father and brother. ”

“It’s fine.”

They walked in time towards the forest Kagome and InuYasha kept on their property . The air was mild,  and neither Rin nor Sesshomaru  felt the need for a coat

“Thank you, for my birthday,” Rin smiled up to Sesshomaru as they walked in time around Kagome’s garden , “ it was wonderful to spend it with Kagome and InuYasha and your father…”

“I’m glad it made you happy.”

They walked for a moment more, Sesshomaru checking to make sure that they were well away from the house before he paused.  Rin watched as he pulled out something from his breast pocket, looking at it before he gave it to her.

“ This is a birthday present from your father,” Sesshomaru murmured,  Rin taking the small envelope from him , “you don’t need to open it, if you don’t want too.”

Rin folded her lips, looking to the browned parchment. Her fingers ran over the opening,  taking a moment before she opened the envelope. Rin hesitated over the letter, but she did pull out the few small packages  he’d sent her.

“They’re seeds,” Rin smiled softly,  “from home…”

Sesshomaru kept quiet, knowing that it was partially him that h er father  sent her the present he did. Sesshomaru was honest with Rin , telling her that her father kept in touch with him, and he was  telling him how she was. Rin didn’t tell him to stop, but insisted that she wouldn’t talk to  him.

“I can hold onto them, if you’d like.”

“No,” Rin said,  “I ’d like to  have them… maybe plant them,”  she surprised even herself as she pocketed the gift .

“Oh?”

“If I’m right… he sent me my mother’s favorite flowers ,” Rin told him, “I still want to see them … ” she looked back to the letter, “I don’t think I can read this just yet…”

The young woman  put her hand on his arm ,  reaching up to give him a kiss on the cheek.

“Thank you,” she murmured, “you didn’t need to give this to me—”

“ Yes, I did,” Sesshomaru said .

“Even… if it makes me upset? On my birthday?”

“Isn’t that when I give you an umbrella?”

Her smile was something he would never tire of. Rin took the chance to explore a little more, leaving her husband to watch  her  walk towards the woods . She turn ed back to watch  and wave to him, and  reminded him vividly of  the day he’d arrived for her mother’s funeral .

He and his father were already on the road when they got the news, both to be in attendance to Rin’s coming out ball. InuTaisho insisted on seeing Rin and her brothers and father now, and Sesshomaru did not o bject. When they arrived, it was to a distant Takeo, who seemed very out of sorts and seemed to  wander his house without being present. While his father tended to his old friend, Sesshomaru went looking for Rin, whom  Takeo was mumbling something about her needing to come in.

He didn’t need to look far, and found her sitting on an old swing just up the hill on her father’s property.

For some reason, he’d never really seen Rin as a woman until now. She was dressed in a simple white dress, with her bare toes scraping the dirt. There was a book in her lap, and her brown eyes were staring blankly at some spot in front of her. Perhaps it was because any trace of innocence or child-like joy was stripped from her face rather than her figure that he was seeing her differently.

And h e hated it.

Misery had no place on her face, especially when a smile looked so good on it. That little girl that used to fish for frogs and make her mother scream by releasing them in the house was gone now, and Sesshomaru found himself wondering how to bring her back. As he  s tepped up to her, he noticed that  she had dark circles under her eyes and the light was gone. She  wasn’t crying , though it seemed  only for a moment now, and a there was still a shiny track down  her cheek.

“Oh… Lord Sesshomaru…”

Only now did Rin realize he was standing in front of her. Quickly running her hand over her cheek, she dusted what she could off her dress before she stood up. The book was now to her chest, her arms crossed as if she were guarding it.

“Forgive my appearance,” Rin said, bowing low, “I wasn’t aware we were expecting company…”

“My father and I were on our way when news reached us,” Sesshomaru told her, “I’m…” he paused; apologies and empathy were never his thing, “I’m sorry… for your loss.”

She nodded, acknowledging but not necessarily accepting.

“Where are your brothers?”

“ Masashi is off for training… he’ll be getting the news shortly, if he hasn’t already,” she looked back to the house, “ Akihiro had a bad reaction to-to the news,” she took in a deep breath, “he’s in bed now, resting on doctor’s orders.  Ken’s locked himself in his room; he won’t come out or speak with anyone or eat anything.”

Rin swallowed, glancing from the demon to the ground as she wondered what to say next.

“I’m sorry,” she finally said, “you came all this way and—”

“Don’t concern yourself over it.”

Comfort was not something that came naturally to the demon, but Rin  didn’t seem to be able to carry the conversation on her own.

“What are you reading?”

“It’s a book of fairy tales,” Rin explained, looking down at the book for a moment, “my mother used to read this to me when-when I was…”

That was all it took.

Tears fell from her eyes. At first she tried to wipe them away, profusely apologizing to him.

“Uh...  uhm ...”

She hiccoughed, now desperately trying to  get rid of her tears.

“I’m  sor-ry ,” Rin sniffed , “y-you came all this way and-and—"

Rin couldn’t seem to stop, and Sesshomaru didn’t know what to do. All his worldly training, all his lessons and etiquette and degrees from established schools and he didn’t know what to do or say to the crying woman in front of him.

“I’m sorry! I-I thought—”

The young woman  continued to cry, clearly embarrassed in front of the demon . Her knuckles were  fruitlessly  wiping  away her tears , and her chest was heaving with each breath. Sesshomaru came to stand beside her,  hoping it would help him feel less lost with her.

“Rin.”

A warm coat was placed on her shoulders, keeping the wind off of her skin. Sesshomaru was careful with his hands, keeping one on her shoulder and another on her elbow as he helped her to his side,  the book still to her chest while one of her hands was clamped to her mouth.

“Your father wants you inside. Come.”

Rin didn’t fuss or fight as she walked alongside him.  He supposed it was odd, him in a formal and fitted suit and she in a simple white dress and muddied feet, walking together back to the house. Rin paused a few times to take a breath, but she made her way inside on her own two feet, feeling more embarrassed when she saw Sesshomaru’s father sitting by hers.

Her father almost immediately sent her to her room to get properly dressed for company. InuTaisho told her that wasn’t necessary, but her father insisted. She only returned when Sesshomaru and his father we re about to leave. Dressed in black, Rin held the demon’s coat over her forearms, looking from the two men to her father.

“Here you are, Lord Sesshomaru,” she said, handing it back to the demon.

It was then  Sesshomaru’s fingers brushed over the back of her hand , and he had to fight the urge to pull her in for a tight hug and take her away from her pain .

“Sesshomaru?”

Brought back to the present, Sesshomaru saw Rin watching him with a smile tugging at the corner of her mouth.

“You seemed lost in thought,” Rin teased, “what are you thinking about?”

He watched her approach him, hands behind her back .

“You.”

Rin laughed at this .

“What is it?”

“Nothing,” Rin’s cheeky grin would not leave her face, “ who’d have thought you were a romantic at heart? ”

“ You’re the only one to ever  bring this out in me ,” Sesshomaru said quietly .

“Yeah?” the young woman seemed to  enjoy their teasing more and more, “no one else?”

“No one else, just you ” Sesshomaru promised,  his hands on her  elbows as he returned to kiss her again , “ it’s only ever been you. ”

“Hey… Sesshomaru?”

“ Hm ?”

Rin looked up to him with big brown eyes,  “ are you happy?”

The question seemed to come out of nowhere, his head tilting .

“With me I mean,” Rin  clarified .

“Where did that come from?” Sesshomaru asked.

“You’re always asking if I’m happy with you,” Rin shrugged, “ but… are you happy with me? ”

The demon’s jaw flexed at her question . Happiness was not something he could easily describe, and it was not something he would freely admit to feeling. But with Rin?  He looked down to her, the young woman waiting for his answer.

“Yes,” he answered simply, kissing her  on the forehead , “having you with me makes me feel … I don’t know how to describe it… but I know I don’t want it to stop.”

Rin  felt her heart beat a little harder at this. 

“You’re usually so good with words,” Rin teased, her hands on his chest.

“I usually say very few,” the demon  reminded her , his hand sliding over hers, “I  would’ve thought it bothered you.”

“Why would it?” she asked  “ b ecause I’m so chatty?” Rin  shrugged , “I could say the same to you ,” she paused for a moment, “ you don’t say much, but that means what you do say matters . ”

“Rin—”

“I told you, didn’t I? I picked what I thought was your offer,”  she said, “ I knew what I signed up for , with you, anyway,” Rin added after a moment , “you were never the kid to p lay with me or my brothers , and I knew when you were coming to my coming out  ball I probably wasn’t going to dance with you ,” she rested her cheek on his chest, “but the  fact that you were coming at all … that meant something to me.”

Sesshomaru’s fingers slipped around her waist, his  lips to the crown of her hair .

She was right, of course; he was only coming to see her off into society. He wouldn’t have danced with her, and he’d have regretted it for the rest of his life. 

And he was content with that fate. He would be a footnote in her life at most, and she would never know  how much her smile meant to him.

To know that sh e knew  who he was all those years ago…

“Come on,” Rin tugged h is arm, “ I think  Kagome wants us in.”

“Alright.”

He followed her back , watching her smile light up at the sight of a chocolate cake covered in a layer of whipped cream. While she had insisted that no one sing her any songs, she was still just as excited to  share a piece with everyone. The demon stayed by Rin, watching her  enjoy the sweet confection while never forcing him to have a bite , but he could still taste it on her lips when they kissed each other good night , and for once he didn’t mind the sweetness. He found that since letting himself enjoy it, it was something he was beginning to crave. 


	25. Wedding Dress

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's later than usual! Real life caught up with me and had a bit of a shake-up this morning (black ice isn't fun! Stay safe out there y'all!) but I'm fine, and the chapter is here!

Water splashed as  Rin’s feet kicked in the bath tub, her head leaning back as she relaxed in the heat. When they returned home  Sesshomaru went right back to work, and Rin would spend time in the part of the garden Sesshomaru had landscapers make for her and under her direction. She loved feeling the dirt under her fingernails again , and it helped that here was a place in the conservatory where she could start a small seed nursery. She did see more and more of her husband , especially for dinner and in the evenings , and he kept closer to her.

Her gardening meant more often than not she would get herself and her skirts dirty, which Kaede chastised  her for and demanded she take more frequent baths.  The old woman would run the tub until it was steaming  and made her mistress stay in there for at least half an hour. Tonight Kaede was  complaining of a headache, and  Rin let her retire early, though not before getting another earful about how  a Lady was to act like a Lady.

Toweled off and drying, Rin slipped in her warm robe and walked  into her bedroom, pausing at the  sight of the stunning white gown the was hanging  on the door to her closet.

Kaede told her she was airing out Rin’s wedding dress to check for any stains or  mold growing, so now Rin was left staring at the white gown with nothing but a towel wrapped around herself an d her hair still wet damp . Gently, her hands reached out to run over the lace, the careful craftmenship  smoothly falling through her fingertips.

It really had been almost an entire year, hadn’t it?

On a whim, she pulled it off the  hanger .

She held it in her fingers for a moment longer, feeling the lace slide through her fingers again before she let her robe drop and stepped into the dress. It was easy enough for her to lace up on her own, and she  was quickly in her  white wedding dress again.  Rin looked at herself in the mirror, surprised  at how much better she felt in her wedding dress.

It still fit her well, and she turned around to look at the back of the flowing gown. With her layered hair still drying,  it wasn’t as free-flowing as it had been on her wedding day , but it still  complimented the dress. She turned to look at her back , wondering what she’d have thought if she had walked down the aisle today, knowing what she knew. Rin could still remember her father’s arm as he walked her down the aisle, and it hurt knowing he was lying back then too.

Sesshomaru had told her that her father was still writing to him, and seemed like his health hadn’t taken a turn for the worst, which did let Rin breathe a little easier . She doubted very much that she would ever be ready to speak to him,  but she wasn’t naïve to the fact that time was never guaranteed.

That was when she noticed Sesshomaru standing at the doorway.

A year ago , she’d have jumped in surprise, but now she just stood quietly in their room, her eyes meeting his. Sesshomaru kept quiet, as he always did , and watched as Rin pulled her hair over one shoulder and let it fall.

“Kaede was just airing it out,” Rin explained qui etly, fiddling with some of the bead ing, “and I wanted to try it on…”

Without a word, Sesshomaru quietly shut the door, and walked up behind her . He turned her to the mirror, his arms around her waist and his fingers splayed  on her abdomen.

“You looked beautiful then too,” Sesshomaru whispered, pressing his lips to her hair.

Rin smiled unconsciously at his words.

“Kaede will get mad if she catches me,” Rin said,  taking a step from him, “help me?”

Sesshomaru nodded, coming to  slip his fingers between the lacing of her corset and gently tug the strands loose . Rin’s hands were over her chest and she would occasionally glance to the demon , who would, in turn, catch her eye at exactly the right moment.

“There,” he murmured after a minute, “that should be loose enough. ”

He stepped back from her, and turned to leave the room, only to be stopped by Rin’s hand on his wrist.

“Sesshomaru…”

Rin was slow as she  stepped up to him, her other hand keeping the dress to her. With a deep breath Sesshomaru watched as Rin let her  dress fall to the floor and exposed her self  to him once more.

“I want my wedding night… before my wedding anniversary.”

The demon looked down at her,  the young woman stepping out of the pool of white silk and lace to bring her naked body close to his. Her hands pressed on his chest and  her eyes looked up to him, closing as he brought his lips down to meet hers. Sesshomaru’s own fingers slid down her back , settling  on the curve s of her back . With her in his arms, he took careful steps back to come to sit on the edge of the bed, Rin now standing over him for a moment.

Her knees came to settle on either side of his, and she felt her husband’s hands move from her back and around her hips.

“If you’re serious about this,” the demon  murmured , his long fingers sliding up her  inner  thigh , “ let me…”

His answer came in her kissing him again, her hands cupping his cheeks . She hummed quietly as Sesshomaru kissed her back , one hand pushing her long hair back and off her face . Her fingers trailed from his markings, down his neck, and finally to  his tie with her Christmas present holding it fast.  Sesshomaru was the one who undid it, making sure to place the ornament somewhere  they couldn’t lose it.

Rin moved carefully with his shirt, slowly pulling off each button of the white shirt until  she came to his vest and coat, which Sesshomaru helpfully removed for her. She leaned back as her husband’s chest became exposed to her . Her hands ran over the smooth skin , pushing the white shirt further and further off of him.

Sesshomaru ’s arms slipped out of the sleeves as he brought her back in for another deep kis s, this time with his lips travelling to the underside of her jaw and down her exposed throat. Long black hair slipped over R i n’s shoulders as she tilted her head back for Sesshomaru’s teeth and mouth to worship her skin. He managed to move with her, keeping her body on his while his back found comfort against the pillows.

“ _ Hah! _ ”

Rin’s whole body lurched forward as she felt two fingers slip into her . Her chest was suddenly on his and one arm was at his back while her other gripped the top of the headboard.

“ Shhh …  shh …” Sesshomaru whispered, his  tongue running up her neck before he started to kiss and suck at her collarbone.

“ _ Huh… mm… _ ” Rin’s hips shuffled as he  adjusted t he  foreign thing inside of her.

Her back unconsciously arched  as she felt Sesshomaru nip at her collarbone . Slowly, her fingers let go of the wood and drag up the back of his skull ,  her nails digging into his hair. Sesshomaru moaned at this, his head tilting up to meet her lips, tongue plunging into her mouth once more.

Rin’s arms tightened around Sesshomaru’s neck, holding onto him tightly . Blood pounded in her ears and  she tried to focus on her breathing.

“ Shh …” Sesshomaru kept shushing her, “just breathe,” she could feel his nose against her neck , “only when you’re ready.”

“ _ Ah… uh- _ _ uhm _ _ … _ ” she swallowed thickly, “ _ I-I—” _

His fingers pressed up in one swift motion, making her gasp a little harder . She mewled under him, her toes curling  and body tightening .

“You’re so beautiful...”

If anyone had told her  her husband was capable of such sweet words she would have had them investigated for madness. But now, with sincerity and desire dripping from his voice, she found her breath catching and her chest rising at the words.

“Can... can you say that... again?” she asked quietly .

“You’re beautiful,” he obliged, his lips to her skin, “you’re so beautiful. ..” he paused, and then, “I love you.”

Sesshomaru said it without anger or frustration or out of obligation. It was because he wanted too , and that made her heart jump into her throat. On instinct, she brought his lips to hers,  growing more and more addicted to his touching. Her tongue slid over his, taking short gulps of  air  and not wanting to be apart from him.

She started to calm down as his body came closer to hers , his fingers slipping out of her and moving to take off his pants.

Her curiosity got the better of him and she looked down, blushing even more  when she noticed how hard her husband was because of her. Deliberately looking away, Rin tried to focus on something other than the very handsome demon now looming over her.

“Rin.”

Her fingers were to her mouth, and she  tried to  figure out what the right response was.

“It’s alright, Rin.”

As if he knew her thoughts, Sesshomaru gently took her hand and brought it to his lips.

“Just be honest...”

She finally looked back to him, wishing his amber eyes weren’t so piercing or vivid in the darkened bedroom.

“I... I’m okay,” Rin swallowed, “ I want this... I want you...”

“It shouldn’t hurt,” he said, “tell me if it does.”

Rin nodded dumbly, glancing down for a moment before her blush returned.

Her hand still in his, Sesshomaru slowly brought her fingers to his chest, silently  encouraging  her.

“ I am yours too,” he whispered, bringing her attention back to his face before he returned to their kisses.

Rin’s fingers ran over the toned flesh of the demon above her, his lips refusing to leave hers and his fingers sensually slid up and down her sides, his body becoming more excited by the soft hums and moans she let slip. Eventually, she started to move up  over his shoulders and run along the muscles of his back , her nails starting to press and  dig in.

They started to  tense as he  opened her legs more.

“ Shh ,” he whispered, his lips returning to her neck, “I’ll go  at your pace ... even if you stop.”

“ _ I... uh... _ ” Rin swallowed, “ I... don’t want to stop...”

The demon tiled his head somewhat, looking down at her.

“I... I’m happy... it’s with you...” she finally admitted , pressing her bare chest against his.

“Tell me why,” he asked, his  fingers splaying on her back.

“Because you love me.”

Sesshomaru brought his nose to hers, Rin ’s fingers digging into his scalp.

“ And... because I love you too...”

All his life, the young Lord had been told he was better than most. Better educated, stronger,  more ruthless; he was always destined to be great and do great. He was supposed to be stoic and cold and uncaring. 

And  when  she said those simple words to him, he felt  his supposedly icy  heart beat a little stronger .

“I’m not lying,” she whispered ,  pulling him in for yet another kiss ,  “trust me.”

“ With my life.”

His arms under the back of her knees , Sesshomaru started to slowly ease his way inside her, watching her face for any signs of pain.

Rin kept looking from him to his abdomen, clearly more nervous than anything . She  had her hands on his biceps, her fingers twitching  as she unconsciously tightened and tensed. Sesshomaru didn’t seem to mind, and  in turn, buried his nose into her hair, drinking in her scent deeply.

He stilled once he was inside her, feeling Rin fidget and twitch under him. One of his hands was on her crown and he pulled back to catch her looking down. It was no surprise; she was a curious woman, and she was  still so new in some ways. One of her hands trembled slightly as she let it rest on her abdomen.

“Here...”

Sesshomaru guided her hand again,  letting her feel where he and her were connected. Big brown eyes met his honeyed amber before she pulled her fingers slowly from his and slipped them around his back, lifting off the mattress and kissing  him deeply once more.

His first thrust caught her by surprise, and  she audibly gasped . Her nails managed to leave dark marks in his flesh , and her legs  tightened around his hips.  Sesshomaru ’s hands gripped her hips as he thrust in again, coaxing a moan out of Rin as she found the feeling less and less uncomfortable and more and more enjoyable.

“ _ Se-Sesshomaru—” _

The demon loved hearing his name tumble from her lips like they did.

“ _ Uh...  _ _ haah _ _... _ ”

She started to cling to him tightly, each breath coming out in moans and mewls that were growing increasing in volume.

He’d never been with a woman so innocent and honest about her desires, never had someone who was so honest and open with him .

One arm wrapped around the back of his neck while another ran down the curve of his spine, her own fingers feeling his muscles relax and contract. She was whimpering and crying out, her body seeming desperate to grow ever closer to him.

At one point Rin seemed to grow nervous that others in the household might hear them, but she soon became less and less concerned as her taunt body fell back against the cushions , her fingers reaching up to grip under the pillow . Sesshomaru took the opportunity to lower his teeth to her chest, his kiss turning into a  bite that was stronger than he meant too.

And if Rin’s reaction was anything to go by, she loved it.

Her toes gathered up the bed sheets and she threw back her head to cry out . Instead of pulling away from him she managed to turn her body closer .

“ _ Se-Sesshomaru,” _ Rin gasped, “ _ mo _ _ -m- _ _ ah-more— _ _ oh-oh please! _ _ " _

He hastily obliged, running his fangs over her pale neck,  harshly biting down and then tenderly licking the  marks he was leaving on her.

Rin panted as he thrust into her repeatedly, her back arching as her body tried to figure out how to deal with the unrestrained pleasure. One hand slid to the back of his neck to collect a fistful of his long locks while the other desperately clutched the bed sheets as though it was her only anchor to reality. 

She could feel his long nails drag over her hips and thighs,  he careful not to leave any marks on her that she did not ask. He seemed to know based on how she reacted what he could do to make her feel better and make this more pleasurable for her . Rin felt nothing but good while Sesshomaru treated her in ways she didn’t know she wanted.

The demon could feel her tightening around him,  making him groan in pleasure. She wasn’t the only one making noise,  but he  just wanted to hear more from her.  He nipped and nibbled at her jawline,  part of him loving how she let him mark her body. Her hand on the back of his head gently pushed him closer when he met the crook of her neck,  and Sesshomaru’s teeth  elicited another  sharp cry out of her.

It was then  she climaxed.

Sesshomaru felt her whole body  become taut like a drawn bow, and he heard her  cry his name out. It was too much for him, and he felt himself follow suit. Normally, his stamina would be more pronounced ;  maybe it was because of who his partner was for the night , but he was breathing just as  hard as she was.  The demon staggered for a moment,  making sure to keep himself over her and not collapse on top of her  body. He was left looking down at his wife , the young woman evidently trying to process what the two of them had done.

Rin just lay on their bed, covered in bite marks and sweat . Her long, black hair was splayed over the cream sheets and her bangs were matted on her forehead. She seemed to look off in the distance while she  tried to regain her breath , her chest rising and falling at a slow, rhythmic pace.

“Rin...”

She looked up to the man who called her name,  watching as a curtain of silver hair slowly slipped from his ear . After a moment, and with a tired smile, she reached up to him,  feeling him fit  comfortably into her arms.

“You’re warm,” she whispered, nestling against his  neck.

“As are you...”

Rin curled in tighter to her husband,  feeling his arms wrap tightly around her waist. Unconsciously, her fingers ran over the lines of his face,  feeling her husband closing his eyes and kissing the palm of her hand.

“Hey...”

Her fingers tilted his head towards hers, feeling her heart flutter at the gentleness in his eyes. She saw him meet her gaze, then look downwards to see the dark marks he’d left on her. Fingers trailed over her collarbone , pausing at the forming bruises on her skin .

“Sesshomaru.”

Rin’s lips were to his cheek, gently kissing hi s marking.

“Thank you... ”

“Rin—”

“For listening to me.”

She pulled back, smiling as she met his eyes. Sesshomaru felt his heart beat harder in his chest at the sight, and he came to bury his nose in her neck, closing his eyes and letting his body rest beside her s.

“Sesshomaru?”

His fingers ran over her cheek, Rin leaning into his hand.

“You’re not  nervous anymore,” Sesshomaru commented, feeling her curl close to him.

“Because it’s you...”

“You say that so  easily ,” the demon murmured , Rin laughing quietly.

“It just comes easily when I’m with you,” Rin said, “ so do a lot of things...”

“I know the feeling...”

She hugged him back tightly,  knowing that the reason she felt different with him wasn’t purely because of the sex. Rin didn’t lie when she told him she loved him , and it didn’t come out of nowhere either.  The rest of the road a head wasn’t easy, but it wasn’t going to be a lonely one, for either of them. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't worry, not done just yet ;P but I do want to thank you all for your patience and feedback. I really do listen and I do adjust. You are all wonderful and amazing people!


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